Gwyneth Paltrow on Her ‘Super Ballsy’ Daughter: ‘I Always Follow Her Lead’

10/11/2016 at 08:00 AM ET

Gwyneth Paltrow Harper's Bazaar
Alexi Lubomirski

Most moms probably expect their kids to follow their paths in one way or another. But for Gwyneth Paltrow, it’s quite the opposite when it comes to her daughter.

“My daughter is super ballsy. I always follow her lead,” the actress and lifestyle businesswoman, 44, shared about 12-year-old Apple for Harper’s Bazaar‘s November cover story. “I actually don’t need to encourage her to take risks. She likes to push herself; she wants to see how far she can get.”

Adds Paltrow, who is also mom to 10-year-old son Moses with her ex-husband, Coldplay frontman Chris Martin, “It’s really inspiring to see that in a young woman.”

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Gwyneth Paltrow Harper's Bazaar
Alexi Lubomirski

Even though Paltrow credits her older child with developing her own strength, the mom of two and Goop mastermind can’t deny that their upbringing has played a role.

“In my case, I’ve borne these two kids into a particularly strange circumstance,” says Paltrow, who has spoken in the past about the importance of keeping a family dynamic despite her conscious uncoupling from Martin.

“They are going to have to fend off a lot and protect themselves from a lot of projections and prejudice about who they are, coming from the family that they come from,” she continues.

It’s no surprise that Paltrow’s children are strong and independent already, considering her own upbringing.

“[My dad’s] whole parenting philosophy was to give my brother and me the skills to be grown-ups and the curiosity to ask the right questions,” she says. “I don’t know if I came to this life with [my drive] or if it’s something that came to me in my childhood, but I do feel that some of the things my parents said to me and how they raised me really stuck with me.”

RELATED VIDEO: Gwyneth Paltrow Says She Regrets Announcing Her ‘Conscious Uncoupling’ with Chris Martin on Goop

Paltrow continues,  “I remember when I started acting and didn’t get a part and was really jealous of the girl who got it. My mom [actress Blythe Danner] would say to me, ‘If you don’t get a part, that means it’s not your part. It’s just not yours. You will have your parts.’

“It really recalibrated me at a very young age to where I could be driven because I was trying to achieve things for myself, and that had nothing to do with what anybody else was doing.”

Paltrow admits that although she is thankful for the character traits her parents helped instill in her, that experience came with a lot of tough love — specifically, one instance she remembers when she was at the pinnacle of her film fame.

“I was sitting with my dad, feeling great about my life and everything that was happening, and he was like, ‘You know, you’re getting a little weird … You’re kind of an asshole.’ And I was like, ‘What the hell?’ I was totally devastated.”

Gwyneth Paltrow Harper's Bazaar
Alexi Lubomirski

“But it turned out to be basically the best thing that ever happened to me,” she continues. “It’s the difference between someone who loves you more than anything in the world giving you criticism and getting it from some bitter stranger on the Internet … I’m so grateful to him for doing that. He was such a no-nonsense guy in that sense.”

And considering her personal opinions on growth as she navigates her 40s, it’s no wonder the Iron Man star’s daughter is a powerhouse.

“If you haven’t taken all of life’s incredible knocks and disappointments and used them to become a fully integrated, self-expressing person by the time you’re 40, then what can I tell you?” she says.

Jen Juneau

FILED UNDER: Gwyneth Paltrow , News , Parenting

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Showing 11 comments

Lilly on

Self absorbed goofball.

megan on

Her face is photoshopped to heck in the first two photos. And her kids are not going to face “prejudice” for being the children & grandchildren of famous, wealthy, white, amicably divorced people; give me a break

Anonymous on

Ugg.. to unattractive… photos and words.. Trying to reinvent herself for in order to get work. Not happening in the age of film.

BettyBoo on

I heard she is still an asshole, she sounds so full of herself. I feel sorry for kids of stars, their parents marry four or five times, moving from one home another and most of the time are troubled just like their creepy parents.
And this new thing uncoupling, its called DIVORCE.

Anonymous on

I really want to like her, but yeah, she is remarkably condescending and superior.

Jane Gryte on

She is not that thin in real life, and the photoshopping is beyond creepy. She is also the most ARROGANT woman ever to walk the planet. Her Goop team is so ungrateful. They did a store in NYC last year, and my friend said Gwenyth never would talk to any of the people who worked on the deal. She also got PAID by GOOP every time she did an appearance on behalf of the company. Robbing her own company for her wallet.

eive on

I actually like Gwyneth. People are so bitter and angry because she can’t relate to you. Some people are born have’s some are born have not’s. You wanna see a self absorbed bitch, look at Jillian Michaels, not Gwyneth Paltrow.

Iowa Girl on

After looking at the first picture, I’m wondering why women wonder why they are objectified…. And the photoshopping is beyond belief. Way to give young girls body image anxiety!

BooBoo on

I think she’s beautiful…albeit completely out of touch with reality. Oh, and she has a great singing voice.

Dad calling.... on

Wow, Gwennie, I think your Dad was on to something. Might want to revisit that….

marilyn on

Who let the dogs out?