Tori Spelling Doesn’t Regret Dyeing Daughter Stella’s Hair: ‘It Was a Choice I Made’ with My Daughter

03/10/2016 at 02:10 PM ET

Tori Spelling wasn’t surprised by the backlash she received when she allowed her 7-year-old daughter Stella Doreen to dye her hair.

“Everything we do, I feel like, there’s some people that are like, ‘Great!’ and some people, ‘Not so great,’ ” the Beverly Hills, 90210 alum told PEOPLE Now. “That’s just part of being in the public eye.”

Tori Spelling Stella hair dye
Gregg DeGuire/WireImage

Despite the public’s reaction, Spelling, 42, still stands by the decision to color Stella’s long locks.

“It was a choice I made that I made with my daughter,” she explains. “That was a personal choice. It was something she wanted to do. It was something I agreed to do with her during the summer break.”

It turned out to be a learning experience for both Stella and her mother. Stella learned she never wanted to dye her hair again while Spelling, who has three other kids with husband Dean McDermott — Finn, 3, Hattie, 4, and Liam, 9 on Sunday — learned “the more we tell [children], the more they’re going to say, ‘Now I’m curious about it because I’m not allowed to do it.’ ”

Spelling adds, “Stella did it. She was 7 and she got it out of her system.”

In the video with PEOPLE Now, Spelling also opened up about how she and McDermott, 49, started over after the cheating scandal. “We learned how to communicate because we didn’t know how to communicate,” she explains.

Spelling will appear on this season of David Tutera’s CELEBrations, premiering Friday at 9 p.m. ET on WEtv, and in Tori and Dean’s Spring Picnic, premiering March 20 on the Cooking Channel.

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Showing 118 comments

Charlie on

“‘Now I’m curious about it because I’m not allowed to do it.’ ”

Exactly. We just saw this with my cousin; Aunt & Uncle wouldn’t tell her ANYTHING about sex and would only let her do Bible-based, abstinence-only education. She’s now pregnant.

You have to pick your battles. Hair dye isn’t permanent. It isn’t a tattoo. It isn’t alcohol that can damage your body. It isn’t a cigarette or tanning bed that can cause cancer (I’m looking at you, Tan Mom. I’m also proud to be from one of the first states to ban UV tanning services for minors.)

This is one of those learning experiences that it’s OKAY to let your kid have. “Well, I tried a different color and I didn’t like it. Lesson learned.”

jm on

She’s 7 – what about setting some limits – yes picking your battles is one thing but there’s also NO – BECAUSE I SAID SO!

Paula on

Mother of the year award again…….smh!

Smr on

It’s her kid, ppl need to mind their business! The hair color wasn’t that drastic in change.

PCC on

If the daughter was 13, it would be one thing. Yes, the more they are curious the more they want to do it, but at seven you can’t stop that from happening.

LeeToo on

You fried your own hair, now you fry your daughters? horrid.
btw – you could be OUT of the “public eye” is you stopped shoving yourself and family into it!

MIM on

For me and my daughters, it’s about the right of passage, and at the right time. 13 is the earliest my daughter will get her hair colored. why is everyone in such a rush for their daughters to grow up. I don’t think she’s a “bad mom” I just feel somethings should happen at an appropriate time and 7 years old isn’t it.

Sal on

@charlie you don’t think the bible knocked her up, do you?
@paula well she’s better than the old one post selfies…

goodie on

The 7 yr wanted to dump bleach on her hair…..we agreed together.

Nica on

What a dingbat! Be a parent and say no. We’ll discuss again when you’re 13 or whatever.

Guest on

Why would you put something potentially carcinogenic on a child so young? Care a little more about your child’s health, or at least get educated.

Kelly on

So easy to sit behind a computer and judge, isn’t it? I made a deal with my 8 year old son. Good grades and he gets a blue stripe in his hair. Oh the horror!

Stephanie on

what a dumb@%$

Michele King on

@Charlie I agree that there are worse things this child could have asked for. Yes, hair color is not permanent, but the chemicals in hair dye can, and do get absorbed by the scalp. Also, seven years old is a little young to be giving in on harmless requests such as these. I think a lot like you in the regard that it is easier to give in to the things that do not cause permanent harm. I just would never allow it for a child that young.

Tata on

It’s okay everyone. Once her daughters turn 13, if they ask for breast implants, she’ll take them to a plastic surgeon to have implants. Silly,ugly cow

SMH on

It’s hair dye. She didn’t have the child’s limbs removed. People need to flipping relax.

Laura on

How could she be struggling financially? Candy’s paying her rent and covering all food and tuition bills!

Ariadne on

Already whoring her daughters out as child models. I guess they have to eat, right? I mean obviously no one’s hiring her or her husband. She is shameless.

Kate kearney on

Holy F. seriously? You bleached a kids hair? Being a parent is about saying no when your child’s whims have negative health and psychological effects. She wanted to have blond hair because of her blond mother (scratch that- bleach blond mother).

krtmom on

She’s an idiot! You don’t dye a 7 year old’s hair. What’s next? A nose job at 10?

nasty on

now Tori stop bleaching YOURS

Cyndi on

Just when you don’t think these people could get any worse, they do. “Just part of being in the public eye” ??? Tori, my God you’re stupid. You and your ridiculous husband can be in the public eye all you like but insisting on putting your kids there is hideous and unacceptable. You just don’t get it. You and your creepy husband are the worst parents ever for doing that to them.

nicole on

tori and her family stopped by my store a few months ago. the kids were all so kind and well behaved. dyed hair or not, i’d say they are being raised very well.

Tracey on

My daughter had been asking since the age of 7 to dye her. Most likely because she saw Mom doing it. My rule was that she had to wait til she was at least 15. Being the strong willed child she is, she kept pushing to have it done earlier and I refused. Our compromise was to have some coloured extensions put in. She was happy, Mom was happy and with the amount of time it took to put the coloured extensions in, she decided she didn’t have the patience to sit in a chair waiting for hair dye.
Colouring your child’s hair at 7 doesn’t win you the award for worst Mom of the year. It may not be the smartest thing she’s ever done and certainly other options could have been figured out, but she doesn’t deserve to raked over the coals for her decision either

GuessWho2 on

I hope she at least chose a dye that doesn’t have as many chemicals.

Barbara on

I don’t understand why people freak about hair color. Its the LEAST invasive thing you can do to alter your appearance. I let my daughter get blue streaks in her hair if she got a good report card. Who cares?!

Martha on

OR…how about we stop sticking our noses in other people’s business and let them raise their child the way they want? It’s not like she is breaking the law.

traci on

What a pill this one is. Bad judgement seems to be the prevailing theme in her life. She’s lucky the kid’s hair didn’t fall out. Going that blonde can result in problems… and on a 7 yr old head? Oh my. Stupidity reaches a new level for her.

guest on

oh good, so she is turning her kids into mini me versions of herself just like her whack job of a mother did to her. Talk about perpetuating child abuse. Now she is in debt and reduced to doing psychic commercials. what a joke.

Marlena on

I dyed mine the first time at 16…….my mom’s rule was yes I can do it but I had to save my own money to pay for it

Alex Rodriguez on

who cares.
all your kids are going to get toasted because of global warming.
“Thanks for leaving me a SHlTTY PLANET mom!”

Meg on

I wouldn’t allow it but every parent is different. Hair dye doesnt hurt the child. Not a big deal.

Leslie on

Didn’t know coloring your hair was a crime. And don’t bother spouting off about the harsh chemicals….WTF doesn’t have harsh checmicals in this world? Never saw a headline that read “Death by haircolor’!!!! SMH!

Ella on

Tori isn’t the worst mother out there. But, I don’t think letting your daughter dye her hair at 7 is intelligent either. When you bleach your hair, it is permanent. I doubt Tori is going to let her daughter walk around with four inch roots, so I imagine Stella will be getting another dye job soon. Go with extensions.

So on

So many judge mental people! Big deal it’s hair will grow back. My mom never allowed me to do anything with my hair. So when I moved out I chopped it and started dyeing it. My daughter asked me if they color their hair and I let them it’s not a big deal. I did it myself and it was an often thing. I let mine 10 year old get pink on the bottom of her hair. It was fun. Pick your battles and this one isn’t a big deal.

Michele on

When do seven-year-old decide what’s good for them?! What’s next , a tattoo ? Wow ! be a responsible parent it’s OK to say ” NO ” to your children .

nana on

Where is the broke can’t pay her bills Tori getting $ for hair dye?
her daughters are modeling? Can their folks live off them?

josie on

Did anyone else notice “what appears” to be cut marks on the wrist and a bruise on her right arm on the first picture of her and Dean? Maybe it’s a bad camera angle or she leaned against something and it left an impression mark. It looks weird…

Pam on

7 is awfully young. I started coloring my hair about 12, my mom didn’t let me I just did it, and got into a lot of trouble, still kept doing it. My daughter wanted to perm her hair and color her hair at this age but I said no, she finally colored it for the 1st time about 2 years ago at 14. It is a parents choice, and it isn’t permanent it just seems silly and vain for a child so young, but she is in Hollywood. I guess it could be worse she could have let her pierce her belly button or something a little more extreme and long lasting.

nana on

Where is tori getting the money for hair dye? She can’t pay her bills?
so her daughters are modeling, can the parents live off their money?

CC on

Sorry she is too young. My mom wouldn’t let me dye my hair until I was old enough to pay to fix it, cause she said “you will ruin your hair then want me to pay to get extensions and I am not doing that”. So when I was 17 with a job I was allowed to dye my hair. Guess what? Didn’t want to dye it anymore. The point of being a parent is to tell them no because it is good for them, not give in because they are just so curious. Plus she could have used wash out sprays or chalk to do something cute with no chemicals. My rule for my future kids.. no chemicals on your hair until your 18 and can pay for it yourself lol

Just Saying on

Tori looks good (looks healthier than she has in a long time)
As for her daughter dying her hair – it’s okay to let them do things once in a while – not like she killed someone.
And now she knows she doesn’t want to do it again.

Anonymous on

Hopefully, Stella won’t ask if she can smoke crack.

Anonymous on

Stupid woman. Lousy mother.

Marcia Gerber on

It is hair dye not a tattoo. Her daughter, her choice! Pick your battles and don’t sweat the small stuff life is too short!

mic on

everybody hatin on tori remember gwen stefani dyed her sons hair too. not much outrage over that.

Brandy on

Why is she saying “Summer Break”? It’s March????

Amy on

II remember wanted to color mohair at age 10 when it started turning from blonde to brown. My wonderful mother refused and I thought that she was the meanest mother on earth. But I grew up and thanked her for it. I would never allow a small child to do that!

Sally on

Seriously, who cares. In today’s society, kids of all ages are expressing themselves in different ways. This isn’t abusing the child in any way and it’s not a choice you have to make, so shut the f*** up about other people living how they want to live.

Missy on

I am all about picking battles, but there should still be limitations. In my opinion, 7 is much to young to give her the control to decide on coloring her hair. I would have said that’s something we will do when you are 12 for example. Why not have play wigs and dress up clothes instead of already doing the “big girl” activities. Too much too soon will usually bite you in the butt later.

Jennifer on

She did it for the summer break? Ummm, It’s only March Tori.

Callie on

Not a big deal people. Just hair color and it will wash out, relax!

Ann on

@Michele King: First you said, “Yes, hair color is not permanent, but the chemicals in hair dye can, and do get absorbed by the scalp.” Then you said, “Also, seven years old is a little young to be giving in on harmless requests such as these. ” And, “. . . . .it is easier to give in to the things that do not cause permanent harm.” So, even though the chemicals in the dye can be and do get absorbed by or in the scalp it is harmless and would not cause permanent harm? I’m confused. I was almost agreeing with your pot until I got to that part.

Anita Friday on


L on

I just don’t understand the attitude …. I am not saying she is a bad mum but she is certainly lost some values….

jennifersparisi on

“It’s the price of being in the public eye!”

First of all, dummy, you could get out of the public eye any time you choose. You’re the one going on all these stupid reality shows and then you beg for your privacy?

Secondly, you’re a MOTHER! If my seven year old wants to dye her hair, I would say no. If she asks why, it’s a simple: “Because I am your mother and I said no. You are beautiful just the way you are and don’t need to change how you look.”

It’s called being a parent. Look it up.

jennifersparisi on

“That’s just part of being in the public eye.”

First of all, dummy, you could get out of the public eye any time you choose. You’re the one going on all these stupid reality shows and then you beg for your privacy? And if you don’t want to be in the public eye-quit posting pictures of yourself, your husband and your kids all over the place.

Secondly, you’re a MOTHER! If my seven year old wants to dye her hair, I would say no. If she asks why, it’s a simple: “Because I am your mother and I said no. You are beautiful just the way you are and don’t need to change how you look.”

It’s called being a parent. Look it up.

NOS4A2 on

Tori Spelling will do ANYTHING to get attention. She is a talentless, useless waste of space.

sval on

Ok – I really don’t care that she dyed her daughter’s hair – parents can do whatever they want. Only problem with it, is that hair dye is EXTREMELY toxic and causes cancer. I would never expose my daughter to that – especially even before puberty. If she wanted to use a toxic free option – go ahead. Of course, most people aren’t aware about all the chemicals they douse their bodies in every day – so she’s not really to blame.

Cari on

Her kid, her choice. Nobody else should care.

Gia on

She’s only 7 and got it out of her system? This is the craziest thing I’ve ever heard. What else does this poor kid want to get out of her system and will Tori allow it? She bleached the poor kids hair to pornstar blonde.

seabot on

It’s hair. Are people really upset about this?

Kate on

She could have told her daughter that her hair is such a beautiful color that she couldn’t bear to dye it. Hair dye on a tender young scalp can have bad side effects. I wouldn’t have done it. What next? Tattoo, piercing? I wouldn’t have let her do it until she was 15 or more…and even then I’d push for gentle highlights instead of a full on dye job.

Tara on

@kelly…you win the idiot mother award too. An 8 year old boy with a blue stripe in his hair?! Pathetic…hope the kid was mocked and laughed at…I know I would encourage my child to do so.

Anonymous on

She dyed her daughter’s hair? so does gwen stefani dyed her sons hair.

skigirl25 on

OMG! A seven year old? Tori has never been to bright!

Tim on

What’s the drama about dying hair? Is there something I’m missing?

It seems totally harmless and fun to me.

Jess on

Back when I was young (many, many years ago), it was not uncommon to get a Toni perm around this age. I had very fine, straight hair and my Mom gave me one. Of course those perm kits were cheap (made for people without any cosmetology experience), so it came out luke crap. However, when it grew out, I ended up getting a pixie. Oh, then there was Sun-In, a horrible product that I used on myself at 13, and I ended up with orange hair. Needless to say, but I will anyways, these two experiences taught me to go to professionals.

ellwn on

So what. Big deal. Woopdeedoodle! Children have been dying their hair for centuries. And piercing their ears. And arguing with their parents.

People there are worse things a parent can do!

Carry on Tori! 😊

rubyovertherainbow* on

Shame on You. A mother doesn’t die her childs hair, period.

Inky on

She’s a moron.

Pam Pioro on

Tori is such a screwed up person & now she is going to screw up her all her kids. These kids are so young & just because they say I want doesn’t me an they should get it. She will destroy her hair as he has to re-bleach it over & over. Does this Mother have any sense???????? No wonder you are so broke & screwed up. A grown person & Mommy still pays the bills?????

Anonymous on


NSandven on

As a cosmetologist I’ve never had a seven year old come in and say she wanted her hair “bleach blonde.” She made this decision on her own.

EM on

Tori, The Gift of No is a great article that you may benefit from reading. Children need limits and expect them from us. She is 7!

LikeMotherLikeDaughter on

Tori is turning into her own mother.

Van on

She is making her daughter like herself to bleach and re-bleach hair over and over.

Cheri on

Who cares!? In the 80’s and 90’s we were perming and dying our hair at that age. No one waited until they were 13 and no one was criticized for it. People need to mind their business and stop trying to parent others kids.

Shan_Strick on

When my brother was 8 years old he wanted to get her ear pierced. My dad took him and let him get it done when he was 9 years old because he caught him trying to do it to himself with a safety pin. My brother wore that earring until he was about 17 years old. He is now in his 30’s, married with a great wife and 3 kids and works for Berkshire-Hathaway. He is honestly the most together of all of us kids.
I would rather let her go and get her hair colored so that it’s done by someone who knows what they are doing than have her go to a friends house and try to do it herself.

irishmry24 on

I’m showing my age, but, when I was a toddler, there were hair dyes on the market, all brands, to keep your baby’s hair blonde . When my hair was turning from blonde to red- and then brown, mom used that for awhile. I guess she’d have been crucified now, along with plenty of other moms. I’m sorry for Tori, that the public s in her business so far. Your kids seem okay to me.

LPG887 on

Why would a child that young even think about hair dye, peroxide and changing their hair color? My children at that age were not obsessed with their appearance. They were happy to play outside, ride their bikes, go exploring, swimming and enjoyed family travel adventures. These Hollywood kids are doomed with such air heads for parents who are only concerned about how they look and are not taught values or stressed education to develop their minds.

Marta on

Hmmm why not tell your 7 year old daughter that her hair is beautiful the color that it is??!! She’s 7 NOT 17! If your seven year old is able to control you now I worry about the future. It’s ok to say no and have limits.

heather on

Sure Tori, or you bleached her hair so they looked alike in the modeling gig. I guess someone in that family needs to make some dough!

Pat on

I fail to see what the big deal is about dying her daughter’s hair. Her daughter probably saw her mommy doing it, and wanted to be like mommy. Like trying on makeup and high heels. It is just hair color. Something fun to do. It will grow out. Do the people who have a problem with this also have a problem with black people straightening young girls’ hair??

Trish on

who watches these desperate tori shows?

Marcus Erectus on

If she wanted to indulge that particular whim, why not choose a harmless and very temporary compromise like Halloween spray color? Would have satisfied the attention span of a 7 year old, but I guess it would take an actual adult to think of it.

Guest on

So now she’s dyeing her kid’s hair for publicity and having the kids model to bring in the $$$$?

When will Tori hit bottom?

AnnaM on

She is too young for those chemicals on her head….period. That is disgusting.

What the? on

She stripped her 7 year old’s hair of its natural color? Wth??

Debra on

She’ll do anything to stay on tv

Lisa on

Hair dye has chemicals – what an idiot. It is my guess that now she will try to get her kids some modelling or show biz gigs to cure her money woes.

Hannah17 on

I don’t think it’s a big deal but of course she took a lot of flak for it. Look at Gwen Stefani’s son. His hair has been dyed for years. I saw a photo of him with his dad this week pushing a grocery cart, not a hint of dye in his hair. Not a big deal. Back off and mind your own business. One dye job is not going to harm her physically. It’s not like she’s sucking on a joint or robbing the liquor cabinet.

Anonymous on

For god’s sake she is too young to have hair to bleached blonde!

Vanessa on

Her daughter is only 7 years old, should enjoy childhood instead dyeing her hair like adult.

Sarah on

For summer break? Only early March now

IT--2--IT on

The INTEL RUN Hollywood franchise slum
and its ‘challenges’.



Gail Carpenter on

Oh, It is alright to tell your child they are transgender, but not alright to let them dye their hair. Bull.

jayne steiner on

So if the kid wants to jump off a bridge you would allow that too ? She is 7 yrs. Old.

Anonymous on

The picture/ modeling happened last year. As she said, over summer, she agreed and the modeling followed.

Tara, I wish I could say what I want.

Gina on

I allowed all mine on summer break to color when they where and to get theirs ears pireced. Boys include , now grown and in their teens yrs. I HAVEN’T had a problem. Yes , for sticking up for your family. Rest of you mind you own damm business.

Sue on

No big deal! It’s just hair color that will grow out. I
Would have been tempted to frost my daughter’s hair
Because that’s what I’ve done to mine for decades!

Sarah on

She is losing her innocence to have her hair bleached blonde.

Mary on

Quit criticizing; none of us are perfect parents. Every one if us can pick apart another parents decision. She is not the first child to get a dye job and she won’t be the last.

Anonymous on

7 years old is just too young, add at least 5 more years may be fine.

life goes on on

She does anything to have a short moment in the news. Disgusting. She should have her husband get a real job, he is a lazy con.

guest on

I don’t have a daughter but I have 3 nieces and the fact of the matter is girls start that whole thing earlier and earlier these days. Makeup, mani/Pedi’s, wearing thongs and coloring hair. I would like to think that if I have a daughter I would say no but who knows once your in that situation. I definitely think that emphasis is put on looks too soon these days. Why should a ten year old feel the need to get nails done or eyebrows waxed. Let them enjoy being a kid and not worrying about that any earlier than they have to!

Peachy on

Tori clearly doesn’t know the meaning of setting limits with her kids. So if stella wanted to start dating or eat chocolate for every meal, would that be ok too?? You don’t let kids do anything they want just to “get it out of their system”.

Sam on

She is bat crazy dyeing her 7 year old daughters hair, but she is probably not aware of all the chemicals in hair dye…or perhaps she is, but doesn’t care!

Sherae on

It’s hair dye, people. She didn’t dye it green, it’s less permanent than pierced ears, and it was for modeling purposes. There are kids that shave their heads for broadway and nobody says a word. This is becoming a bigger deal because it’s Tori Spelling. There are do many other things to be concerned about .

Smooth on

Now I’m confused, she can’t afford a house is having to rent, her mommy is pay all her bills but she can scrape together enough $ to bleach her daughters hair. WOW the priorities are impressive

Dajoka on

Here’s a suggestion Tori, dye your hair black and change your last name to Kardashian. Get what I’m sayin?

sarah on

Yup she doesn’t know the chemicals for her 7 year old so harmful to the head skin.

Carol on

It’s just hair color. Not permanent. I probably wouldn’t do it to a 7 year old, but it’s not as if it’s child abuse. From all accounts her kids are polite and well adjusted, and that’s what matters.

Charlie on


You’re an idiot. I’d say more, but your reading comprehension is clearly poor.

I keep forgetting these forums are filled with, “Yeah huh, Food Babe said!!! *duck face*” women who believe in “Mommy Knowledge.”

Thank goodness in real life I hang around other women with a graduate education that included actual science.

kristina on

It’s one thing to throw some temp hair color like the pink stuff that washes out than the stuff that is semi permanent and fries your hair. A 7 year old shouldn’t need to get anything out of their system lmao. She should be playing with barbies and watching cartoons.

Sarah on

I think a few hilites of color is fine but to lighten her whole head from scalp to ends is just dumb..and unsafe. People forget these are chemicals….and ll it would take is for her to scratch her head and rub her eye and there would be major problems! Stick with hilites protected in foils on the kiddos…it’s way safer!

Brittany Marie on

The comment section is hilarious. This is the age of helicopter parenting; let us censor our kids, tell them”because I said so” without giving a reason. Newsflash, many kids already have a solid hook of what’s going on in the world, and saying that seven is just too young to know what they want is ridiculous. While you do draw the line where you feel comfortable as a parent, don’t sit there and blast another for something silly like a dye job. No one is a perfect parent, and I would encourage your ALL to turn your attention to the more serious things our kids are dealing with nowadays, like bullying, depression, mass school shootings, etc.

victpria on

What if she wanted to drive?