Hannah Storm on Post-Pregnancy Sex: ‘It’s a Miracle That Multiple Children Are Actually Conceived’

03/08/2016 at 07:15 PM ET

If you’re not feeling like cozying up to your partner immediately after giving birth, you’re not alone.

“Sex is nonexistent for the first couple months,” new mom Coco Austin says in PEOPLE’s Mom Talk series. “It definitely changes … you don’t get the okay to even have sex or go to the gym until 16 [weeks].”

She continues, “But you don’t even want sex, that’s the thing. Everything is about the child and nothing is sexual in your world. I never thought about this!”

Hannah Storm Coco Austin Ashley Williams Mom Talk

ESPN SportsCenter host Hannah Storm, who has three daughters, knows the feeling.

“You don’t feel attractive, that’s a huge part of it, and you’re tired,” Storm, 53, says. “It’s a miracle that multiple children are actually conceived.”

In fact, PEOPLE editor Janine Rubenstein is trying to unravel that mystery herself.

“I’m trying to figure out — of course, you want a baby and you have that feeling, like, let’s have a baby, and then you have one and you realize how wonderful and how terribly hard it is and you’re like, how do you come to the mindset to have another one?” she asks.

Austin, 36, also brings up the tricky logistics of even trying to conceive again.

“At night, the dogs, the baby — we all plop into our bed and it is a full bed,” she says. “So there’s no alone moments with your husband.”

Actress Ashley Williams, 37, who gave birth to son Gus in October 2014, offers Austin some advice: “Give it time. And also, there’s places to have sex besides your bed,” she says with a wink.

— Andrea Park


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Showing 26 comments

junk on

her husband has three kids. He needs NADA MAS. He did not need THIS one; he had two already, one of each.

wendyw2407 on

Don’t they mean 6 weeks? lol I have never heard of having to wait 16 weeks to do all that, that’s almost 4 months! I think it might be a typo.

Lucky1 on

I hate stories like this, because they make it seem like every woman doesn’t want to have sex with her husband after the baby comes. After my first baby, we waited the requisite 6 weeks, though I’m not sure why. After my second baby, we were back at it after 2 weeks (and yes, I did have tearing and stitches). I tend to believe a lot of women use 6 weeks as a really lame excuse. Jump back into it, ladies!

Jaki on

Wendy – Not a typo, Coco said that. But it is 6 weeks unless something bad was happening. I think she was just flustered talking and screwed it up.

Junk – So Coco can’t have a child because her husband did before her? Wow.

These little clips would be better if they didn’t talk over each other. It’s like a free for all and it doesn’t sound good to listen to everyone or just one person speaking.

Stephanie on

Ummm, I got cleared after three weeks to have sex after all three of my pregnancies. 16 weeks? Maybe she’s just using that as an excuse to not have sex with her husband lol. Honestly, using the new mom excuse for not enjoying the many benefits of sex with your husband is so overused. You make time for something that means a lot to you. If she can find time to post all those pictures she does, she can certainly make time to enjoy an active sex life…that is if she really wants it.

wil on

16 weeks? Is that a typo? The typical advice is to wait until 6 weeks after, though you will be sore for much longer than that. I’m almost 3 months pp and sex still hurts quite a bit.
I agree though about not understanding how women come to the mindset of having a second child. I had my perfect baby boy in December of 2015 and it has been wonderful, but I have ZERO desire to ever be pregnant or give birth again. One and done!
Also why does NOBODY warn you about how awful your first post-partum period will be? I’m not talking the volume of blood, though that is part of it. I’m talking about the PAIN. It felt like I was going into labor again! Pure misery!

Momof3 on

It does get better. With my first child I felt like I was living in a fog for about a year–baby adjustment and finding my confidence as a new mo-not knowing what I am doing mode. It’s normal to have such a life shift and adjustment period. Yes, sex can be painful after the first because your body has just been through a traumatizing event–but it does get better, easier and you do find yourself (and a richer self too) again. A glass (or 2 or 3) of wine for the first time you have sex post partum (and I recommend as soon as your doctor clears you and you feel up to it too–to make that connection again with your husband, etc–and connect with that part of yourself too) For the “one and done” set—I will say. I get it. The pain, swelling and soreness after my first was NOTHING like the uterine contractions after my 3rd. It feels intense at times, like labor all over again. BUT labor itself is easier after the first and your body does remember what to do–so it does get a bit easier. Hang in there.

Sarah on

I find this article so sad. Becoming a mother does not mean you lose your desire for that aspect of your life. And I don’t mean doing it for your husband- having sex helps you retain that fun, passionate, connection with your spouse. I ended up having children 14 months and 12 months apart but sex during pregnancy and after pregnancy can be just as good and you can feel just as desirable and DESIRING with just a teeny bit of effort!

Em on

Sarah- you’re painting with a broad brush, there. Effort is not the only factor here. My sex drive got turned off like a switch when I was about 8 weeks pregnant with my first. 4 years and one more baby later and it’s still just not there. I’ve tried many things- hormone testing, erotic books, sensual aromatherapy, porn, Ben-wa balls. It’s just gone. I have flashes or moments of something but it’s maybe 5% of what I was before. It’s depressing!

Your personal experience is just anecdote and doesn’t represent everyone.

Sara on

The baby shouldn’t be in your bed. They have bassinets that are bed height these days. Even co-sleeper beds that attach to your bed. Putting a baby in your bed can be dangerous and leads to your child always wanting to be in your bed until they are 4ish.

angela on

Ok everyone is different, interesting to know these women talking about their life after having a baby, yeah I can relate to what they talk about.

EWh on

Sara- sorry but you’re wrong on both counts. Being close to your baby in bed can be very safe if done correctly. Both of my babies slept with me and currently sleep in thier own beds happily at night. My primitive instincts told me to keep my newborn baby near me whenever possible, so I did and it worked perfectly! Do what’s right for you.

me on

Everybody is different. Some women don’t feel like doing it and others fall pregnant again just weeks after having one. I’ve never heard about the 16 weeks thing.

IT--2--IT on

———TAVISTOCK mind control ‘engineered’
—————————- – – – RED ALERT.

Anonymous on

Hahaha they’re funny

Liz on

I agree with Stephanie and Sarah. I was ready to have sex after four weeks, with my doctor’s blessing, had no pain, and it felt wonderful to reconnect with my husband again physically. I feel bad for the women who have problems with getting intimate again after birth, but everyone’s experience is different.

Luisa on

16 weeks? On average it’s more like 6 or 7 weeks.

megan on

Aww, Coco. Considering your baby was carried by a surrogate, I think it’s safe for you to be intimate again real soon

Sarah on

Some people don’t feel like doing it and others may do, it depends on a person. I feel bad for the women who have problems with getting intimate again after birth, but everyone has different experiences.

smpalesh on

megan – She is breastfeeding so explain how she supposedly gave birth by surrogate?

Robinepowell on

So basically Ice-T and Coco aren’t going to have sex for about four months, lol! I wonder when she’ll realize she goofed on the time frame.

Anonymous on

I have 5 kids from 4 pregnancies. After my first, I had massive tearing and complications from the birth and didn’t have sex for close to 5 months after she was born. Bethany slept with us until she was 2.5 and she was still breastfeeding. Nothing wrong with co sleeping. She is a perfectly happy and healthy now 11 year old.
Claudia is 6 and slept in our bed until I stopped breastfeeding her at 14 months. Micah & Bodhi are 3 and slept with us until they were 15 months and self weaned.
Our youngest is 5 weeks. She is sleeping soundly in my bed currently as she is being breast fed. She will continue to sleep in our bed until she is weaned. 5 weeks in and Olivia is perfectly happy doing so.

With all my pregnancies, particular my first and 3rd (the twins) I didn’t have sex with my husband for a long while. All my children were born naturally and it is bloody sore and tender for a while. lol. My hubby never once pushed me to have sex before I was ready. None of my children have suffered from co sleeping.

Everyone has a different experience. If you have sex 3 weeks pp, great. If you have sex 3 months pp, good for you.

liz on

I was having sex after 3 weeks, after birth with an episiotomy and baby sick in NICU, sex was a bonding thing. Please do not think ALL women dont want sex after childbirth

Beth Campbell on

Get the baby and the dogs out of your bed!! It’s a marital bed, not a commune!

As the mother of four kids, for me, those moments alone in our room came to mean more, intimacy, emotional and physical, is absolutely a must if you want to succeed as a couple and as parents!

barnacle bille on

What a stupid shallow lame comment from a bib dumb cow moooo

Elise on

Coco….for God’s sake – wear a bra that fits! There is absolutely NO excuse for her to not wear a properly sized bra. The size and fakeness is bad enough, but those horrors spilling over the cups? Cheap, dime store floozy.