Bill Hader: My 5-Year-Old Daughter Has a Potty Mouth!

07/17/2015 at 06:45 PM ET

According to Bill Hader, his eldest daughter is a princess – with a potty mouth.

During a Thursday night appearance on The Tonight Show to promote Trainwreck, his new movie with Amy Schumer, Hader sat down with host Jimmy Fallon to tell some hilarious stories about his three daughters.

In the clip – which has some NSFW language – Hader describes how 5½-year-old Hannah is obsessed with all things princesses and loves to wander around their home dressed as an elegant, pretty princess – until she realizes they’ve run out of cereal.

“She’ll walk in and I go, ‘Oh hello, Hannah, how are you?’ and she’s like, ‘I’m going to make my breakfast,'” explained Hader, imitating his daughter’s elegant gait as she strolled around the room dressed in full princess attire. “And then she walked into our pantry and saw we had no cereal and I just hear her go ‘F—!'”

Bill Hader Trainwreck Tonight Show Jimmy Fallon
Douglas Gorenstein/NBC


The comedian and actor couldn’t help but laugh as he described Hannah’s outrage at the cereal shortage as she came storming back into the room.

“She goes, ‘Woah! Where are the Fruity Pebbles? Where are the Fruity Pebbles?!'” continued Hader. “And then I went in and saw we had no Fruity Pebbles and I was like ‘F—!'”

The former Saturday Night Live star is also dad to Harper, 3 this month, as well as 7-month-old Hayley Clementine.

“I know, it sounds like a fake name,” said Hader with a laugh. “She’s never going to be able to get a fake ID, or anything.”

Trainwreck is in theaters now.

— Aurelie Corinthios

FILED UNDER: Bill Hader , News , Parenting

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Showing 19 comments

Lorna on

She picks it up in the home, so parents have a potty mouth.

thinkingtoomuch on

Why not pour granulated sugar and artificial dyes down her throat? Yeah, fruity pebbles, breakfast of (rotted teeth) champions.

I was surprised Fallon didn’t point daughter is the same age as Bill’s youngest.

And excuse me but Hayley Hader, Hannah Hader, and Harper Hader? Why no Hader Hader, or Hater Hader? or Harder Hader? What the? They had only the letter H among their foam alphabet pieces? Good grief. And Jimmy said it sounds like a fake name, as if Franny Fallon doesn’t sound like a fake name…

it never seems funny to me when little kids swear (note to Modern Family scriptwriters). It’s just lame. Not offensive, but also not funny or giggly cute. Zzzzzzz

anne on

Yes, real funny. Too bad her parents don’t watch their mouths when she’s around.

Manners Matter Everywhere! on

Monkey see, monkey do. Yes, kids learn first at home, then take
it to the schoolyard where their parents blame it on another kid.
Nice parenting guys! (sarcasm)
But Heaven help if someone calls THEM a name!

Jane on

So funny and so what, everyone says F.

Anonymous on

no not everyone cusses there’s no need for it it shows lack of self respect and for others. Low class.

Zav on

Everyone knows to how to says f, even 3 years old.

Dena on

It is really not funny and it is their job as parents to teach her that that is not appropriate language. But I’m assuming she is probably learned it from them. And it’s not going to be so funny when she is in school and she is getting in trouble for using that kind of language and they are getting phone calls.

anne on

I saw the movie last night, he is awesome in it.

Susannah on

That was a cute story but he feeds his daughter Fruity Pebbles? It’s not the ’70’s anymore, we know how bad those cereals are now, full of sugar and not much nutrition .

Bon Jour Kitten on

Something to be so proud of.

guest on

I wouldn’t be laughing about that. It’s not funny at all. Just dumb. This child obviously says what she wants. She will probably go to a school for celebrity kids and the teacher will be scared to say anything either.

diana on

Being a single, working mother of two boys I swore quite a bit around my young children. What can I say, my mother and grandmother did the same. Somehow my young my boys never copied me. but before my oldest started Kindergarten at a Catholic School, I wanted to be sure he was profanity-protected in an era when washing-your-mouth-out-with-soap was not just a saying. I talked to him about not using swear words and why. Being a very intelligent 5 year old he thought about it and said “ok, but I think you should tell me all the swear words so I know what they are.” I couldn’t dispute his irrefutable logic so as he sat in his little chair next to me I ran thru the list. He listened quietly and when he was done said “I think you should tell them to me again.” The end of the story is that I didn’t repeat the list and he was never in danger of having his mouth scoured.

Andrea on

I love how everyone is quick to judge his parenting skills because his daughter dropped the f-bomb. I’m sure he immediately reprimanded her. Can you honestly say you haven’t done or said something other parents don’t agree with? Yes, kids learn this kind of behavior from their parents. However, it doesn’t mean the parent is constantly cursing in front of their kids. It doesn’t mean they’re a bad parent either. An adult only has to say the word once in order for a kid to pick it up. I say that from personal experience as a parent. Besides, there are far worse things he could be teaching his kids.

Tee on

Have to admit that I’m glad to read through the comments and see that I’m not the only person that isn’t amused by this story, not the only person that doesn’t find it “cute.” There’s nothing cute about anyone cursing, never mind a young child doing so. I understand that even the most careful of adults slip and say the occasional curse word but if a child is using it in context like that, it’s clearly not because she’s picked up on it from the occasional slip. That means that kind of language is used around those children all the time and that makes me sad. Jah, I realize that raising children is an “to each their own” kind of thing and that not everyone holds the same standards and morals. But I don’t know… ::shrugs:: This just isn’t funny.

Angela on

Most of the commenters are being totally unfair and unrealistic and just plain preposterous.

It is TOTALLY possible for a child to pick up a word like that from hearing it ONCE, including the context, and if you don’t think so, you don’t understand how smart kids can be, especially when it comes to language acquisition.

It’s also entirely possible that she DIDN’T hear the word from her parents, but even if she did — if you are judging him and his wife, you had better be PERFECT yourself.

Secondly, you ought to realize that the anecdote is being told in a context of a joke, so that doesn’t mean that the parents laughed at the time, or that they didn’t pull her aside and teach her that it’s a bad word. Naturally he’s not going to talk about that part on the talk show. Those of you saying “apparently she can say/do whatever she wants” ought to be ashamed of yourselves for making such an assumption.

martina on

Bill Hader is talented and adorable. But honestly, a 5 yr old girl saying this stuff is kind of awful. I can’t imagine my 7 year old don’t that. Whatever happens, we don’t curse around the kids. I am sure they hear all kind of words at school and on the playground, but it doesn’t occur to them to repeat it. My 4 year old picked up ‘damn it’ at camp, and he had a long talk about that. F-bombs are just not that cute…

Shawna on

I fail to see how this is funny. If any of my children ever said that they would be in serious trouble.

Anonymous on

Not funny about saying cursing words from a 5 years old.

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