Marla Sokoloff’s Blog: Learning to Love Two

11/24/2014 at 02:00 PM ET

Celebrity blogger Marla Sokoloff is going to be a mama again!

Since audiences first got to know her at age 12 as Gia on Full House, Sokoloff has had many memorable TV roles — Jody on Party of Five, Lucy on The Practice, Claire on Desperate Housewives — as well as turns on the big screen in Whatever It TakesDude, Where’s My Car? and Sugar & Spice.

Sokoloff, 33, most recently played Dani on ABC Family’s The Fosters.

She wed her husband, music composer Alec Puro, in November 2009 and the couple — plus pup Coco Puro — make their home in Los Angeles.

Sokoloff is expecting their second child in April, a sibling for 2½-year-old daughter Elliotte Anne.

You can find Sokoloff on Twitter and Instagram.

Marla Sokoloff Blog
Courtesy Marla Sokoloff

Please excuse my absence from writing this blog … I’ve been a wee bit under the weather. Not from the flu or the common cold. Nope. I had a good old-fashioned case of morning sickness!

Actually, evening sickness to be exact, that seemed to rear its ugly head around 5 p.m. every single night. By the time my sweet husband came home with whatever food I was dreaming about earlier in the day, I simply couldn’t even look at it, better yet eat it.

The first trimester seemed endless and I’m happy to report that I’m back to my old self again.

If you read my previous pregnancy blog, you may remember that I didn’t have one single second of nausea. For a minute there I wondered if I was even really pregnant! Truth be told, I even took a few extra pregnancy tests in between doctors appointments just to confirm. I wasn’t crazy AT ALL!

Quite the contrary this time around. (Except for the crazy part — that’s here to stay.) This pregnancy has been extremely different and on top of the sickness, every second seemed to be spent fighting off the debilitating exhaustion that comes with the first trimester. Let’s just say that little Elliotte got her Dora the Explorer fix in those first three months!

My sweet family is expanding and we are all very excited about it! Elliotte is telling everyone that comes within an inch of her that she’s going to be a “big sister” and asks me every single day, “When is my baby coming?”

She tells me she is going to teach the baby how to crawl and talk and, more importantly, cry. From my very blurry memory — newborns do not need a lesson on crying, they seem to have that part down!

I’m hoping that this abundance of excitement sticks around once the baby comes. In the meantime, my husband and me are doing our best to prepare Ellie for her major life change. We discuss the upcoming addition, but not ad nauseam (excuse the pregnancy pun!) and generally wait for her to bring it up as to not overwhelm her.

Even though Elliotte is clearly jazzed about having a sibling, I can’t help but have a heavy heart about how it may make her feel once the baby comes.

For the past 2½ years plus, my little girl has been my everything and when I look at that face, I’m positively blown away by her. She’s a constant source of laughter and happiness and I can’t help but question — am I about to crumble her entire universe?

I know that sounds crazy, but I guess it’s just another part of the ever-present mommy guilt that lives at the pit of my (growing very quickly!!) stomach. I’m sure all of you second/third/fourth time moms know what I’m talking about.

Elliotte is used to my husband and I giving her our full attention and now she will have to share said attention with someone who is really going to be taking a lot of it in the beginning. I know the reality of her asking me to play with her will have to wait until the baby is fed, changed and comfortable and fun little outings like our impromptu trips to Disneyland may need to be put on hold until we are all settled into our new lives.

Marla Sokoloff Blog
Courtesy Marla Sokoloff

I know in my heart of hearts the greatest gift is a sibling. I consider my big brother Jared one of my best friends, and although we had our fair share of brawls as youngsters, I couldn’t imagine my life without him.

He and I are constantly there for each other and we have a bond that truly can never be broken. I can only dream of the same connection for my kids, but before their friendship blossoms, (no pressure kiddos!) I know we will have some growing pains to get through.

Don’t even get me started on how Coco Puro will feel about this new addition!

Since becoming pregnant again, I’ve asked my own mother if she felt this same guilt and if she was able to love me as much as she loved my brother once I arrived. She always just looks at me with a smile and a simple, “You will love them both the same, I promise. You just do.”

Hard to imagine that my heart will grow even more in the coming months.

I want to share a poem that a mommy friend of mine sent to me. She read this often while pregnant with her second child.

It took me about 15 times to get through it because I could barely see through my tears, but once I was able to finish, I realized it was exactly what I needed to hear.

There is so much beauty and excitement that’s about to come my way, and I’m truly feeling way more blessed and lucky than I could have ever dreamed of.

If any of you have any advice on the subject I would love to hear from you. You don’t have to be a parent — older siblings, it would be great to hear from you as well about how you felt when your little brother or sister arrived.

Leave a comment below (I read them all, even the not-so-nice ones) or send me a tweet @marlasok.

Please grab a tissue and enjoy this poem … wish I could give the author credit but the author is unknown.

Marla Sokoloff Blog
Courtesy Marla Sokoloff

Loving Two

I walk along holding your 2-year-old hand, basking in the glow of our magical relationship. Suddenly, I feel a kick from within, as if to remind me that our time alone is limited. And I wonder: How could I ever love another child as I love you?

Then she is born, and I watch you. I watch the pain you feel at having to share me as you’ve never shared me before. I hear you telling me in your own way, “Please love only me.” And I hear myself telling you in mine, “I can’t,” knowing, in fact, that I never can again.

You cry. I cry with you. I almost see our new baby as an intruder on the precious relationship we once shared. A relationship we can never quite have again.

But then, barely noticing, I find myself attached to that new being, and feeling almost guilty. I’m afraid to let you see me enjoying her, as though I am betraying you.

But then I notice your resentment change, first to curiosity, then to protectiveness, finally to genuine affection.

More days pass, and we are settling into a new routine. The memory of days with just the two of us is fading fast. But something else is replacing those wonderful times we shared, just we two. There are new times — only now, we are three.

I watch the love between you grow, the way you look at each other, touch each other. I watch how she adores you — as I have for so long. I see how excited you are by each of her new accomplishments.

And I begin to realize that I haven’t taken something from you, I’ve given something to you. I notice that I am no longer afraid to share my love openly with both of you. I find that my love for each of you is as different as you are, but equally strong.

And my question is finally answered, to my amazement. Yes, I can love another child as much as I love you — only differently.

And although I realize that you may have to share my time, I now know you’ll never share my love. There’s enough of that for both of you — you each have your own supply.

I love you — both. And I thank you both for blessing my life.

— Author Unknown

Marla Sokoloff Blog
Courtesy Marla Sokoloff

xo,

— Marla Sokoloff

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Showing 42 comments

Tee on

It will be an adjustment, for certain sure, but your family will be even better for having another little one in it! I look forward to reading your blog as you go through this second pregnancy!

Rebecca on

Great post, Marla. (by the way, I LOVED you on The Practice, and I’m kind of geeking out a little bit here!) 😀

I am an older sibling, and I really wish I could give some advice, but sadly I was only 14 months old when my younger sister was born, so I didn’t really know what was going on, so there wasn’t much adjusting needed for me, haha.

However, I do recommend the “gift trick”. It would work like this. You give Elliotte a present from her baby brother or sister, and include a note that says that they want to say how excited they are to meet her! Then, you ask Elliotte if she would like to go pick out a present for her baby sibling as a thank you! Then she will feel more involved, and it also helps her relate to the baby as being an actual person (and the gift thing might also be a bit of bribery haha 😉 which may be a bit difficult since Elliotte is only 2.5 years old and may not fully grasp the idea of having a sibling. Plus, it’s super cute 🙂

Also, if Elliotte is for sure super excited and happy about having a baby sibling, then you also could “trust” her with an important secret about her baby sibling’s gender or name, or help her choose between two names or the middle name or something, so then she feels more involved, and then she may have a special connection to her sibling because she helped choose their name.

Anyways, just some ideas. 🙂 thanks so much for your post!

Lynn on

Elliotte is a beautiful little girl!

Jay on

My son was a week shy of three years old when his little sister was born and I was worried he would be jealous of her since he was old enough to clearly remember all the alone time with my husband and I. We wanted him to feel really special and helpful as a big brother so I made him a “big brother kit”. Nothing crazy just a plain canvas bag that I made an iron on decal for with a picture of his favourite thing (John Deere tractors lol) and his new big brother title. I filled it with stuff to occupy him at the hospital so that he didn’t feel left out when people were paying attention to the new baby – a small puzzle, mess free colouring pages, snacks and a little doctors kit so he could check the new baby over. Oh and a big brother tshirt and a little sister shirt for baby girl. It worked for us, he wore his new shirt with pride and told all the nurses about his new baby sister. Good luck!!

JL on

Marla – I have really enjoyed reading your blog and your daughter is lovely! I have never commented on here, but had to this time because what you wrote sounds so exactly like I was before my son was born. My daughter was only 22 months when he was born and he was a beautiful surprise. I spent so much of my pregnancy worried about all the same things you are, I even felt guilty about whether or not I was making her life worse (despite the fact that, like you, my sibling is my best friend).

All I can say, is that it has worked out better than I could have imagined. My son is an absolutely beautiful gift and blessing, just like my daughter is. They love each other so much, and our house and hearts are full with joy beyond measure. Yes, there have been bumps in the road and some jealousy, but I promise it is awesome. It will be okay – better than okay, really, more like amazing. I think in a few years they will really be best buds and it will be a nice age gap. Just make sure you carve out special Mommy time with her and she’ll do fine.

I have to say, though, that once the new baby is here you’ll worry if THEY are getting the short end of the stick because, as you said, Mommy guilt is always there about something. Good luck and all the best to your beautiful, growing family.

Morgan on

As a mother of 4 and there’s a huge age gap between my first 2 and my last 2! My first child also a girl was 2 1/2 when her brother was born she didn’t seem bothered by it at all she really seemed to welcome him with open arms she loved be around him all the time and I always tried to include her in everything I did with him which she really liked I don’t think she ever felt like she was unwanted or replaced! But we also took her to do “just her dates” with my self, her dad or the both of us with her that worked out really well!! Now they are 13 and 10 and love each other to death still even though they do have their moments!! 🙂

My next 2 came later years down the road the older 2 took greatly to having a new baby brother to take care of!! 🙂 But again since they we’re only kid’s we still did the one on one dates and both of us dates with them each I still really think that helped! When my 4th and my last was born my 3rd child was 2 but he didn’t seem fazed by a new baby coming we again did all the same thing’s we did with the older 2 and that again worked out great just can’t tress enough try to include her as much as possible even if she doesn’t quite understand I think it pay’s off in the long run!! 🙂

Good luck, congrats and best wishes!!..

Kristi on

Great post! I had those same feelings while expecting my second. Your Mom is right. Somehow we are able to love them the same. There is no way to explain it just like how you can’t understand the love between a mother & child until you become a mother for the first time. I LOVE seeing my girls bond and grow together.

Keep your sweet Elliotte part of it all. She will know her role as sister and will love being included. My oldest was the greatest little helper. Getting a diaper or clean onsie, helping me read to her baby sister or rocking her to sleep.

Everyone just fits and will find their place. Focus on the joy that is coming instead of worrying about your time as 2. I promise the one on one time with my girls I have now with each is so special.

Your heart will surprise you! I promise!

CF on

The night I went to the hospital to have my second, I could barely tear myself away from my 3 year old girl. It was really emotional to know that we’d never again be just us. And the beginning is an adjustment–my older one has always been super loving to her baby sister, but it was more my adjusting! And now, they are 4 and 1 and the cutest little twosome. I LOVE seeing them together and knowing that their relationship is totally independent of me and my husband. It does feel like a gift they each have.

Also, a friend told me in the beginning something that really helped as I was feeling so guilty about how little time I was spending, comparatively to the first time!, staring at my baby, just being with her. She said, “she needs you less because she also has her sister. Her sister needed all of you because that’s all she had.” It really is true.

good luck!

OG on

Good actress, loved Marla on Desperate Housewife’s.

Gigi on

I can totally relate to this! I have a 2 yr old daughter and I’m 7 months pregnant. It’s bittersweet that my daughter won’t be my one and only anymore.

Jenny on

I hardly ever comment on posts, but this one is straight from my experience as well. Our daughter was a little over 2 1/2 when our son was born. As I got further along in my pregnancy it just seemed to hit me that our daughter wasn’t going to get all of our attention anymore. I felt a full range of emotions about it.

I am the middle child in my family & my sister is 18 months older than me, my brother is just 15 months younger so I know like you what it’s like to have a sibling/best friend. I guess it was about 2-3 weeks before our son was born that I started crying (crazy hormones!!) all the time worried about how she would feel. But like everyone else says, your mom is right. It’s crazy but the love just multiplies to include the newest blessing.

I don’t think I have any advice, we just prayed and went with the flow. My parents bought her a doll she could take care of when I was taking care of her brother. She loved him from the beginning, she had her moments of course but they adjust for sure. Just make sure you give her “special time” with just the two of you & she will do great!!

Congratulations on your exciting news!!! You’ll do amazing!!! One is fun, two is (harder but) double the fun!

Cricket2.0 on

I liked the poem. It’s very true. I have a 3.5 year old and a 17 month old. It’s true that your heart grows twice as big for twice the love. It’s an amazing bond to watch. I got lucky in that my oldest was never jealous. He helped with everything. Even insisted on helping hold my boob while breastfeeding in the beginning. Haha. He loves his little brother.

NEL on

What I did with my daughter was, after my son was born, when I was able to, I took her out to breakfast, just me and her. My husband was home for some time during my maternity leave, so I didn’t have to constantly be with the baby. I was able to give her attention as well.

ourlifewithms on

Thanks for your honesty here– I’m 10w preggers with my second and my first little guy is just 25 months now. I’m worrying about the same things…this poem was perfect (and of course made me cry!!). I appreciate the other suggestions on how to handle this transition. I still am coming around to the notion I will love my second as much as the first…

Jillian on

Congratulations Marla! I have been reading your blog since the beginning and I was just so happy for you when I saw the headline- Learning to Love Two! My older son was just over 2 1/2 when he become a big brother. I promise you that I never had as much anxiety as I did trying to figure out the logistics of welcoming baby #2 and how my son would be affected by the whole situation. It all worked out wonderfully.

My two sons love each other immensely, and I do feel like the greatest gift that my husband and I will ever give them is each other. It is somewhat like your “Mastering the Art of Letting Go” blog… I learned to let go of my older son as an only child. It was incredibly sad for me at first, but I did it and got easier the more I saw how happy he was to be a big brother. My boys are now 4 and 1 1/2 and it’s just awesome getting to watch them grow up together.

The moment that they meet each other is incredibly special. I suggest keeping it just you and your husband and the kids for that moment. Allow yourself time to adjust to your new family. A big sister present for Elliotte from the baby is a great idea. We gave my son a special present from his brother when he came to the hospital. He was just amazed that his baby brother knew exactly what toy he would like! A year and a half later he will still tell me that his brother gave him that present when he came to visit us in the hospital.

Best of luck to you and your family!

Julie on

Your poem is exactly what I needed to read right now. I recently found out I am pregnant with my second child. I keep looking at my 18 month old thinking about going to places with him like the library, parks, or just going on walks which are such special times to me. I keep picturing those special times coming to an end when I have the baby. The poem made me realize those times will be different but that different is going to be okay.

just because on

My oldest was 4 1/2 when her sister came along. She was in school all day and had friends and already knew how to share because she was older. We lost a baby when she was 2 1/2 so the age gap was a little bigger than we had planned. There were 2 1/2 years between my second and third and 14 months between my third and my fourth. They have all been fine with having new siblings no matter their age. I worried about the 14 month age gap but I made sure to give them both plenty of attention and it has all been good so far. The youngest is 3 now.

One thing my husband and I don’t do is alone time with each of them because I feel like we are a family and so we do things together. It also makes the ones who don’t get to go very sad and confused so we include them all.

Oh and my heart has plenty of love for all 4 of them and even though I worried that the babysitter would be loved more than me, nothing is as important to a child as their parent.

Nicole on

I’m the oldest in my family. I have a younger brother and sister. I cannot imagine a life without my siblings. We are all pretty close in age so I don’t remember a time when they weren’t around and that’s ok with me. My mom always says that one day her and my dad won’t be around and it will just be the 3 of us. She has a good point. Its nice knowing they will always be there no matter what. There really is no bond like the bond of siblings. Its such a special thing.

I know Elliotte will be forever grateful that she will have one of the best and most important roles in life, that of the big sister 🙂

Clinton on

Congrats on baby 2! I just had my second child 6 weeks ago and know exactly what you’re worried about, and am here to offer some words of wisdom from my still fresh experiences.

First off, there WILL be an adjustment period, where you’ll probably be with the new baby all the time, nursing/diapering/etc, and feel like life as you knew it has flown out the window and you’ll never have things the way they were with your first child. But then the newborn duties slow down a bit, you recover from labor and you start to really maximize that time with your first and being extra super fun mommy in the moments it’s just you two.

You’ll also be really tired and short on patience at times, but your love for the first will keep you going in those moments with a crying baby, and the sweet snuggly newborn love will keep you going when your first is being a testing toddler.

Eventually, you’ll find a rhythm, just like the poem describes, and you’ll watch the love grow between them as it’s grown for you.

I remember crying my eyes out over the tidal wave of change at about 1-2 weeks after my second daughter came, but things improved shortly thereafter and are slowly but surely getting more manageable and wonderful every day.

Have faith, have fun and good luck!

Anonymous on

Just the thing I needed to read at this point in time! Also expecting number 2 and have so many emotions rolling around with regards to number 1. On the one hand I feel guilty for having another one so soon (2 years difference), on the other hand I know it’s such a gift for my little boy to have a sibling. Then I also feel guilty because I’m not paying as much attention to this pregnancy as I did the first…. Oh boy – lots of emotions 🙂 Thanks for posting this!

Mandy on

So glad to read your blog again. Congrats on the new bundle of joy.

Momma on

Marla, you are adorable and that poem totally made me cry. Congrats!

Melissa on

It is a gift for all. It’s just more love for everyone. (And I secretly tell both my kids they are my favorite). It was fun when they got older and figured out I was telling both of them 🙂

Mandy on

As I sit here sobbing reading your post I am thankful for your words that ring so true for myself. My daughter just turned 3 and we are expecting her sibling in May. I have been so anxious about all of the things you have said and feel a little better now knowing I am not alone.

Thank you for sharing and the best of luck to you and your family!

Mommyx2 on

The mommy guilt is short lived thankfully 🙂 I felt the same sadness & dread while pregnant with my daughter as I knew my one on one time with my son was limited & I started to feel resentment toward my unborn daughter for that. But the moments he was born it was gone & my heart grew to love her as much as my son. They’re just under 2 years apart so his time as an only child was so short that he couldn’t remember it since he was so young anyway. It’s a balancing act but once you get in a routine it will just become the new normal.

I was so happy to read your blog because I felt the same guilt just 3 years ago & thought I was the only one. My sister just had her second so it was good to be able to reassure her that its normal.

Marianne on

I had the exact same feelings as you and my daughter was the same age as your daughter when I was pregnant. I had many a tear-filled, pregnancy-hormone induced meltdowns over the thought of ruining my daughter’s life.

I’m now 6 months in of having my son and the bond they already have is unbreakable. It is amazing not only getting to love on 2 children but seeing the love between your children. Enjoy your pregnancy….oh and you’re about to be very busy 😉

Guest on

I know some will energetically disagree but I think an “only child” is not the way things are meant to be in nature – it happens, but it’s not the ideal. And when parents focus ALL their attention on one child it’s also a form of pressure for that kid. I think it doesn’t prepare them for the real world where they have to negotiate and jostle to get a place for themselves. Once a sibling comes along things are more balanced and realistic. Be grateful you can have more than one child and enjoy the chaos that comes with it!

jacksamoa on

Great post! I had those same feelings while expecting my second. Your Mom is right. Somehow we are able to love them the same. There is no way to explain it just like how you can’t understand the love between a mother & child until you become a mother for the first time. I LOVE seeing my girls bond and grow together.

Ozz on

Nice blog. Happy for her on the new addition!

Dawn on

Every child reacts differently, and often the effects of sibling relationships won’t be fully realized in a particular situation until adulthood. Some end up being best friends, and some end up really resenting each other, despite parents’ best wishes.

A study commissioned by the CDC in 2013 found that effects of sibling rivalry can last a lifetime and cause mental disorders. It’s fun seeing them play together in the sandbox, but ensuring that they grow up adult friends is a much more complicated matter, involving many factors that parents cannot always predict/control.

lali on

Marla, I know it feels impossible to not worry but give it a try. Enjoy your pregnancy now that the puking is done! It’ll be good for Elliotte to see you happy and (somewhat) relaxed.

My daughter was 3 years 3 months old on the day my son was born. I have no idea if the things I did to prep her helped or if she would’ve been fantastic with him either way but it can’t hurt to share her experience.

From the very beginning we always referred to him as her baby or her baby brother. He was never the “new” baby. She had the final say on the color his room was painted and his bedding (already narrowed down to 3 acceptable choices). Instead of a baby shower we had a baby brother party. The invitation was her smiling face with the bump. She opened all the gifts as we explained how each one would help her take care of her baby. The last gift was a Big Sister shirt for her.

The hospital offered a Big Sibling class and part of it was a tour of the maternity floor. Nothing traumatizing like watching someone give birth! The main focus was to show the kids what the rooms look like (so they don’t worry when they see mom in a weird bed with a lot of machines all around) and so they can see how tiny a newborn actually is. There was also a lot of discussion and crafts. One of the best things was they decorated “hospital bracelets” for themselves. That really prevented her from feeling left out when she visited and the baby, my husband, & I already had ours.

The thing that was most important to me was that she be the first one to meet the baby. He was in the rolling cart thing so she could see I was free for her. We snuggled in the bed and waited until she asked to see him. Luckily she fell right in love. They are so freakin’ cute together!

Your babies will love eachother and you will be obsessed with the joy they bring one another!

Anonymous on

Don’t worry Marla. While it’s not the same, I have two dogs. At first, I was worried what would happen once I got a second dog. Would the first dog feel jealous? It turns out I can love both dogs and they love each other. Who would have thought things could work out so well!

Shawna on

It is hard to believe when you only have one child but you truly will love them both with the same intensity you feel for your first. My son was 21 months old when my first daughter was born. I remember all of the feelings you, and the poem, are describing. Seeing the relationship develop between the two of them, and realizing that I could love two separate children so completely, was, and continues to be a wonderful journey. When my son was 5 and my daughter was a little over 3 I had another daughter and my heart grew again, as did the amazing sibling bonds between them. My children are now 14, 12, and 9 and I truly feel the best gift I’ve ever given them in their lives is the gift of each other. They are truly each other’s best friend, and fiercest champion, and I know their lives are made complete by that sibling bond. And I am equally, but differently, in love with all three and can’t imagine my life without any of them.

VG on

Loved reading the blog, especially the poem, very well written. Good job!

JB on

Hi, I am an adoptive mother, and I love your article above. I have a beautiful daughter named Summer, who we adopted early in the year. Summer is almost 2 years old now, and we are just about to adopt and bring home her new baby sister. I have been feeling a great deal of stress thinking of how much I will miss my one-on-one time with Summer, and I have been so worried that she will miss it too when her sister comes. She has had her daddy and mommy all to herself, and I have been so worried that she will feel sad sharing us once her sister arrives.
I am coming to realize, that although this may be a feeling she goes through in the short term, in the long term, the gains are too amazing to even begin to describe. The love and friendship; it is astoundingly beautiful. They will be able to grow up together, and as they come to understand their adoption, they will be able to identify with each other in regards to their roots, and go through the questions and feelings they have with each other as well. Together they will have a strength that otherwise would not exist. It is so hard to express in words, and I appreciate everyone posting here who is trying to do so, and thank you Marla for the article.

Morgan on

I feel as though I could have wrote this. I have zero morning (all day) sickness with my first born (he will be 2 in Feb). However, this little one which I am due in June with has got me purely exhausted and sick. I remind myself how thankful and blessed I am but I have the same thought cross my mind- how will I ever love this baby as much as my 1st and how in the world will it all make sense. I have faith that it’ll all work out. Many blessing to you and your family!

Ashley on

Such a pretty little girl! Welcome to the new baby too 🙂 I know they will be best friends.

Valarie on

Their new girl will be a good playing friend for her daughter.

jandljensen on

This is beautiful! Your whole story Marla. I feel very much connected to your feelings in that I am going thru the same exact thing!! Just entered by 14th week of pregnancy and am starting to emerge from my nausea coma. It was exactly how you described it – 5pm came and it hit hard. My husband would bring home all this take out food that sounded so good an hour earlier and I would eat cereal only to throw it up later. It’s so so tough. My daughters viewing choice was curious George and I fought the mama guilt so bad that she was watching tv too much. Then a friend told me “the benefit of your bringing a sibling into the world for her far outweighs anything you might do to screw her up in this season”. I had to laugh. It feels amazing to feel like a somewhat normal person again. Thank you for your genuine thoughts. I too worry so much that my daughter won’t feel as loved or that I may not love the next one as much. But a mamas heart just grows more and more. Cheers to second trimester and enjoying our daughters before the next one comes!

Tiffany Mullinix on

My daughter was 4 1/2 when our son was born. I was so scared that I wasn’t going to love him as much as I loved her. The night we left her to go to the hospital to be induced I cried the whole way there, I was nervous that she would be upset with us gone and that the next time she saw us there would be a new person in our family that would take up most of my time. Once I held him in my arms I understood what everyone was talking about, your heart grows and makes room for the same kind of love that you feel for your first child. 3 years later they bicker and fight but love each other so much! I love watching them interact and be sweet and caring to each other when they think no one is looking. It is definitely an adventure and you will figure it out as you go along! Best of luck!!

Annoyed on

Seriously? I’m so tired of posts from mothers about how they’re somehow victims because they love their children so much. Count your blessings! Do you know how many women would give their left leg to be pregnant just once, let alone twice? Get over yourself. You’re going to have two beautiful children whom you love dearly. You’re fine.

Priscilla on

Great blog, so many people can relate to this. Congrats!