Kristin Cavallari: Baby Before Marriage ‘Worked for Us’

09/26/2013 at 03:00 PM ET

Kristin Cavallari The Bump
Jeff Schear/WireImage

Kristin Cavallari does not regret the road she took to her happily ever after.

Despite discovering she was pregnant shortly after announcing her re-engagement to Jay Cutler, the reality star admits she would pick the same path if given a second chance.

“That was just what worked for us. We got engaged really quickly — after only eight months,” Cavallari, 26, tells The Bump.

“We definitely weren’t ready to get married then and so we put everything on hold and we ended up having the baby before. I think that when we did get married, we were absolutely ready.”

The couple — now proud parents to son Camden Jack, 13 months — have come full circle, having recently tied the knot in June. “Everything happens for a reason and it all works out how it’s supposed to,” the newlywed says.

Open about Cutler’s presence in Camden’s life, Cavallari insists her husband is a great parenting partner and thrives while on daddy — and diaper — duty.

“He is an amazing dad and he has been since day one. He helps me with everything,” she shares. “He’s not the kind of guy that doesn’t want to change a diaper. He’s very hands-on and it’s adorable to watch your husband with your little boy. They’re so cute together.”

Now that football season has started, Chicago Bears quarterback Cutler is in game mode, leaving the new mom on her own one night a week. But the break gives Cavallari plenty of time to catch up on her pampering!

“I can put a face mask on and do all my girly stuff when he’s gone, and it actually works out really well,” she explains.

However, despite getting “excited” over game time, the start of the sport is bittersweet for the tight-knit family.

“Football season’s a lot of fun around here, but at the same time it’s also kind of scary,” Cavallari says. “Jay’s gotten hurt the last couple of years so it’s definitely hard in some ways — but overall it’s a lot of fun.”

As Cutler fulfills his football obligations, Cavallari has been equally focused on her own career, which includes her jewelry, shoe and clothing lines. While she’s been “fortunate” in balancing baby and her brands — the first-time mom often works from home — the juggling act hasn’t always been so easy.

“I remember when I first had him, I had to go to L.A. He was seven weeks old and I had to go to a photo shoot for my shoe line,” Cavallari recalls. “I was breastfeeding him and so it was a challenge to stop every two hours — or hour and a half really — to breastfeed and then to get back in the groove and go take pictures.”

She adds, “Those moments are harder, but overall I’m very, very blessed that I’m able to work from home.”

— Anya Leon

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Showing 69 comments

sandy on

um did you have a choice??! it’s called an oops.

Emma on

That sweet baby was a surprise, not an oops!

Anonymous on

Sandy, they did actually. They could have got married before they had the baby or not got married at all. We all have choices.

nicole on

they said the babys a really good surprise

maryhelenc on

Marriage does not necessarily make a family strong. I think when you have a surprise pregnancy, maybe you shouldn’t just run down the altar. Learn to co-parent, work together, and see if the relationship will make it. Then if it does; make it legal. She makes a lot of good points.

chuck on

it’s a trap!

Anonymous on

Well, let’s see about that in 5, 10 or 15 years. You had no other choice so of course, it worked. And you better work VERY hard at your adult relationships because you made irresponsible decisions and now you need to live up to very heavy and real responsibilities.

Zeze on

It worked out better for her to seal the deal!

Anonymous on

What choice does she have but to say that now? “Whoops, really screwed that up?” At least she’s focused on her baby and husband.

Amanda on

To Sandy: Not necessarily. Some couples do plan having children without being married. This isn’t the 50’s anymore.

Niki on

Oh geez, nice try. You got knocked up whenhe broke up with you. Please stop trying to sell us some fairy tale. Talk to us in 20 years if by some miracle you’re still married.

Anonymous on

It was a great way for her not to lose him a second time.

Lk on

Please she planned it, Jay comes from a very traditional family. It was the only way he was going to marry her. She can spin it all she wants.

sara on

So they weren’t ready to get married after eight months but they were ready to have a baby together? I don’t get that at all. Having a baby should be a bigger decision than getting married. It’s definitely something you should be more prepared for. Maybe that’s just me.

Gigi on

I can’t imagine not being ready to marry someone, but being ready to have a child with them. I think it’s called accidentally getting pregnant and having to deal with the situation. Don’t try and sugar coat it. We get it.

Sharon Murphy on

Nice plaid jacket Jay,

Anonymous on

What is she suppose to say? It’s a dumb question to ask anyone since she can’t hop in a time machine and re-do anything. They seem happy – isn’t that all that matters. My husband and did the same thing and 10 years later and four more kids have taught us that nothing can ever be really “planned”!

Suzzzz on

Discovered she was pregnant “shortly after the were re-engaged”…yea right. She is a bit old for the OOPS…don’t know how that happened! TRAMP TRAP!!

joanne1965 on

Seriously? You got pregnant on accident, unplanned…If this is your way of justifying it, then you are quite immature and irresponsible.

Barbra on

Dear Sandy…there is something called contraception. Yes, women DO have a choice of whether or not to get pregnant of contraception is practiced the correct way.

Anonymous on

Sandy, my goodness you are such a negative person. Who are you to critique someone else’s personal life as if you have always made the perfect decisions(not). She said they did what was right for them.

Getting pregnant isn’t a oops when you are in a committed relationship and having unprotected sex. He certainly didn’t have to marry her just because she had what you called a oops. There a lot of women out here who aren’t married and have oops out of wedlock. It takes a real man to stand up and do right by the woman and their child. You do have women who choose not to marry their child’s father, but that don’t make them any less respectable.

Alison Howell on

Wow…lots of hateful comments. Who cares if they got married or had a baby first? As long as they are happy together and raising their son together, why does it really matter?

Anonymous on

Everyone is a critic. People, get a life (aka your own) and quit worrying about what others, especially celebrities that you don’t know, do. Geeze.

DS on

It’s very interesting that no one is saying, “If he didn’t want a baby, he could have used a condom.”

Selena on

it worked really well for her. Weren’t they broken up when she “realized” she was pregnant? Then they got back together? Yeah, worked REALLY well for her! Oldest trick in the book!!

Gigi on

Really have a child to see if ur good at co parenting know wonder kids are so mess up now in days what ever happen to adopting a dog

Gigi on

If it works for her then fine, but I would never do something like that, I think it’s wrong. I got married then had my baby and I think that’s the right way. When my child is older I will teach him to get married first then have children and have an honorable family. I’m not putting others down for not being married I’m just saying my family is very traditional and out of wedlock kids would not be accepted.

Jenn on

The wedding was only back in because of the pregnancy. Sad…

Cynthia on

“Everything” does not happen for a reason, “everything” happens because you both lack the character and values to do marriage the right way. We’ll see how long this one lasts.

Cynthia on

No one expected any better from Cavallari, but Cutler has kids that look up to him and had a chance to be a role model. She should keep her comments to herself instead of trying to justify their behavior in the media.

Jane on

She had a choice whether to get married right away, wait, or not at all until after becoming pregnant and I do agree it was better that they waited. But given a second chance I think the best thing would have been waiting to get married in the first place.

Anonymousresponder on

Funny, I wonder if she’ll teach her children it’s okay to do the same. Whatever happened to being on birth control and or condoms? I guess the same thing that happened to self control and responsibility. I guess when you have a spouse that makes millions it doesn’t matter as much.

WooHoo on

I don’t care when she had her baby but I still can’t stand her.

Mztmom on

Jay’s a BIG baby in his own right. I think it’s so stupid when people say we weren’t “ready” for marriage but we had a kid anyways. The kid NEEDS you to be ready for marriage. Every child deserves two parents. I think she got pregnant to trap him for his money.

Alayna on

I think the only reason why she says she would pick this path again is because it worked. If it had worked the other way she would say the same thing. Even though I like a traditional path- I’m happy for them and happy their family is working. I love them!

Aud on

I wasn’t planning on ruining my pregnancy with a marriage. Ten years later, me and “my baby’s daddy” are still together and unmarried (with 2 more kids). 🙂

britt on

you weren’t ready to get married, but you were ready to have a child together? Pfft.

Cindy on

That’s because Kristin and Jay have no morals, which explains baby before marriage.

unlsted on

How sad for the CHILD, who has two totally self-centered parents who have no regard for his welfare or what’s right and wrong. They were ready to have a child but not ready to be married…yet?? What kind of topsy-turvy world is that??

ImALadyToo on

Ready to have a baby but not ready to get married?!?!?!?! Because having a baby is so much less a responsibility, right? Stupid is as stupid does.

ImALadyToo on

Amanda – this isn’t the 50s any more? Of course it isn’t. People had morals in the 50s. Today? Not so much.

Ginag on

She certainly made sure he was not going to dump her for a second time…..a baby usually takes care of that, at least for the short term. He won’t stick around though….just watch and wait.

focal point on

No, not everything happens for a “reason.” Sooo much suffering in the world, and for what reason, you bubblehead? Such a facile and insipid cliche. My favorite is “he helps.” Your husband helps you? Do you “help” him? Husbands aren’t hired parental substitutes. The kid belongs to both of you. As for “baby before marriage worked” — we’ll see in a few years. We’ll be watching! as for what Gigi said, I was ready to have a child with someone after we’d been together years; but I would never be ready for marriage, because I think it’s lame.

focal point on

she had to stop breastfeeding to do photos? oh no….as awful as having to carry water four miles from a filthy well while nursing, or having to chop the cane in the field, or having to pause because your father is beating you…oh yeah. she has it rough. she should read “Half the Sky.”

Daniela on

Not for anything, but just because someone is married before having children doesn’t mean they have morals. In the 1950’s, getting married before kids was the thing to do. But men cheated on their wives, beat them, and often left families. Today, women and men are married and live 2 lives.. marriage doesn’t equal morality.

Secondly, if you watched her E! special or ever followed Cutler on twitter when he still had an account, they cleared this stuff up.

Thirdly, if you have a brain you will know what no matter what interview given, comments get taken out of context all the time. Grow up and stop judging. She didn’t say they did what was RIGHT. Just right FOR THEM.

Ivixen on

I’ll never understand how people can say they are ready for the lifetime commitment of a child but not yet ready for the commitment of marriage. Seems like it’s just a trendy thing to say because it doesn’t make a lot of logical sense.

Ivixen on

“Everything happens for a reason”? No, things happen as the result of choices people make.

Tara on

Surprise my arse! She locked that down. Sorry, Cutler couldn’t go thru with the wedding and bailed a week before and texted his proposal…. It’s the only way Cutler would go through with anything.

Libby Bush on

I have NEVER heard such NASTY & RUDE COMMENTS! I’ve been with my husband for over 20 years & married for over 16 years…I was raised Catholic & never really thought about having a baby before marriage.However,if I knew how my life would take an unfortunate turns of events health wise, I most definitely would have had a child as soon as I could have…MARRIED OR NOT! Every baby is a BLESSING & I for one can only pray that it’s in God’s plans for us to have one. I have a girlfriend that got pregnant on birth control so if its gonna happen, its gonna happen.

aby on

We were married a year exactly when our amazing suprise came along but we had already been together 9years so married or not it wouldnt have made a difference. Being married is very nice and I think parents should be but i dont think it makes or breaks a relationship/makes you good parents at all. She seems so much better now than back in the hills, couldnt stand her!

Lotte on

“We definitely weren’t ready to get married then and so we put everything on hold and we ended up having the baby before. I think that when we did get married, we were absolutely ready.”

Am I the only one who seems to think this loop-comment makes NO sense at all? If you’re putting everything on hold because you realise your relationship is still too short to be tying the knot, shouldn’t you be taking equally strict measures to prevent a BABY from happening? Seeing as that’s by far a much bigger and scarier commitment to have?

kouzes on

babies prior to marriage “works” only if you have no morals

heather on

They’ve been married for a few months. Maybe she should say it’s worked so far.

lc on

of course it worked out for HER! It got Jay to marry her after they had broken up

H L on

Um, why is she doing clothing and such? I mean really, if we could all be stylists I am sure we would love it, but come on. Laguna beach’s leftovers have wannabe celebs, and to be frank, it’s laughable. Secondly, if you aren’t ready for marriage because it’s “too soon;” so is having a baby, if that’s the way you are looking at it! Nothing wrong with having a baby first, but don’t try to justify it by saying it was “too soon” to get married.

tina on

What a bunch of bitter old biddies on here. Kristen and Jay didnt have to get married, why can y’all just be happy for them. They are a great family.

Diana on

“I’ll never understand how people can say they are ready for the lifetime commitment of a child but not yet ready for the commitment of marriage. Seems like it’s just a trendy thing to say because it doesn’t make a lot of logical sense.”

Spin the argument around and it doesn’t make sense either. Just because two people are married does not mean they are ready to raise a child. At the end of the day, all that matters is that a child has two loving parents. Whether they’re married or not doesn’t make much of a difference. It baffles me why people care about it so much.

Selena on

If Cutler continues to play like he did yesterday, he’ll dump her before the end of the season. And really, it must suck to wake up every day wondering if the only reason he married you is because you were too stupid to keep from getting pregnant. Seriously, it’s not that difficult to figure out.

Erin on

someone is trying to act like she didn’t get knocked up…lol…oh please…why wouldn’t you want to spend time as a couple before having a child, to experience married life before you make the huge commitment of bringing a child into this world? I will never understand how people can pop out babies but then delay marriage, makes zero sense

D on

Seem’s like they both got what they wanted a baby and a marriage.. she’s come a long way from Laguna Beach and The Hills and she’s prob. the only adult from the rest of the cast except for LC!! She’s also smart by staying out the press and in the public eye every now and than

Leeann on

Here’s what’s wrong with this:
” it’s adorable to watch your husband with your little boy. They’re so cute together.”
How about, It’s adorable watching him with OUR son??
“I can put a face mask on and do all my girly stuff when he’s gone, and it actually works out really well,”
Because you can’t do that stuff while he’s home??
“We definitely weren’t ready to get married then and so we put everything on hold and we ended up having the baby before. I think that when we did get married, we were absolutely ready.”
This just doesn’t even make sense!

I give it 5 years max.

deb on

Seriously, I wish you the best, but you’ve only been married a matter of months, would like to hear from you 10 years down the line.

Jenn on

It worked out better for my Fiance and I as well. We have year old twin boys. I am tired of being judged by society for not being married. It’s a piece of paper- I have thought the same thing for a long time- even before my situation occured, that marriage does not neccessarily make a family. Would I have preferred to be married? Well, yes. But it’s not what happened and I have no regrets! I do, however, think that Kristin perhaps got knocked up to stay with him instead of just moving along.

Marisa on

Oh pls!!! You baby trapped the poor dude!

Brenda on

Oh I’m so tired of people acting like Cutler wasn’t part of the baby making process. Women always hating on other women. He went to Vandy and is a smart dude, if he didnt want to get her pregnant he should have wrapped it up. There are surprise pregnancies all the time. They got pregnant when they reunited not during their breakup. So he was not with her cause she was pregnant and wasn’t forced to marry her either. They seemed happy and is raising their child, so whats the issue. You can have a broken engagement, work things out and be all the better for it. perhaps her being pregnant put things in perspective, so what.

ann on

She shouldn’t have to explain anything to anyone. It’s her life and she can live it how she chooses. I hate it when people use their own beliefs to tell everyone else how he/she should live. Everyone does not believe in marriage…I personally think it’s overrated. The divorce rate is so high because many marry for the wrong reasons.

veronica on

I had to work for you what else were you going to do.

Nicki on

This is shit she said ages ago. Holy crap!!!

Nadia on

How old are some of you? Some of you are so judemental it is not your life back off. I became pregnant after 2 months of dating my son father we been together over 5 years now. We were in engage but I did not want him to marry me because I became pregnant so the ring became a promise ring. Guess what I am becoming a nurse condoms and birth controls are not 100% . You know what is ? not having sex .It is my life and other peoples life if we do not want to get married it is our lifes. Guess what common law as me and my son father are we still pay the same taxes as a married couple. Also even if we were to break up I still have the same right as a married persson in Canada and I am not sure if it is different in other countries. Big chunk of the world are not legally married and are doing fine and allot of your ancestors were not married before having kids. How do you know your ancestors were not out of welock children?