Elisa Donovan’s Blog: How to Handle the First Week with Your Alien

11/15/2012 at 08:00 PM ET

Thanks for welcoming our newest celebrity blogger, Elisa Donovan!

Best known for her roles as Amber in Clueless and Morgan on Sabrina, the Teenage Witch, Donovan currently stars in the ABC Family franchise The Dog Who Saved Christmas. The latest installment, The Dog Who Saved the Holidays, will premiere in December. Following that, she will costar in MoniKa, set for release in 2013.

Donovan, 41, is also a writer and yogi. A recovered anorexic, she assists in counseling and supporting young women struggling with eating disorders.

She lives in San Francisco with her husband, Charlie Bigelow, and their 6-month-old daughter Scarlett Avery.

She can be found on Facebook, as well as Twitter @RedDonovan.

Elisa Donovan's Blog: How to Handle the First Week with Your Alien
These are the moments that remind you it’s all worth it – Courtesy Elisa Donovan

For the record, I’m an idealist. I’ve always been a believer in the ultimately gracious and supportive energy of the universe. A relentless optimist. I’m the person that believes in being the exception to the rule.

Call it my non-conformist punk rock youth roots, but I’m actively irritated by a bandwagon. One of my biggest aversions to a clambake being those who cop out on the rest of their lives once they have a child.

So when people say things like, “Oh when you have a kid everything changes, you’ll see“, and “See if you feel like having sex after you’ve just cleaned vomit and poop off of your shirt for the third time in an hour,” and “Who can put on makeup or change out of sweatpants (that I’ve been wearing since early April) when I barely have time to pee?” it makes me want to run screaming from the room.

I couldn’t wait to have a kid myself so I could prove all of those unfortunate defeatists wrong. I would show them that Life Is Beautiful and having a baby is A Gorgeous Miracle and I’m Eternally Grateful and Amazed, and Jeez Why Do People Make It Seem So Hard?

Let me stop right here and say: Everything I ever said about being pregnant and being a mother before I got pregnant and became a mother, might be bulls*#%.

People always talk about that first drive home from the hospital as “the longest 20 minutes of your life”: those terrifying minutes when you have your new baby in the car for the first time and you’re en route to your home, where you have absolutely no idea what you will do when you arrive.

For Charlie and me, that drive was bliss: loving the movement of the car, our daughter slept the whole ride. Living only 10 minutes from the hospital, I thought maybe we should drive around the block a few times (or up the coast for a few days) before going home, to prolong the peace and false sense of control we thought we had.

Elisa Donovan's Blog: How to Handle the First Week with Your Alien
Scarlett in her first nightgown and cap – Courtesy Elisa Donovan

Yeah, the car ride was cake. It was the first night at home that was the zinger. After swaddling, shushing, swishing, swinging and singing a freakin’ Hail Mary, Scarlett was still wailing like a rock star at the top of her lungs. There we were: two full-grown adults at the utter mercy of this teeny-tiny monster in her swing with her tiny little snore and interrupted breath, whose every move scared the crap out of us.

“Are you hungry? Is your diaper wet? Do you need to be picked up? Do you need to be put down? Are you trying to tell me something? Do you want me to shut up? Should I leave? Should I stay? Can I get a vowel??? … Am I bad parent? They should make you get a license for this!!!”

Scarlett finally did calm down (I’d love to tell you what it was that worked that made her sleep and give you the magical solution for when it happens to you, but — I was so exhausted I was hallucinating by the time she was quiet, so I have no idea what actually happened).

Then we spent the next two hours lying in bed peeking over the covers holding our breath, checking to make sure she was still breathing every five seconds.

One of the sick ironies of new parenting is that when your baby is crying, you are terrified you’ve done something wrong and you must do something right immediately! But when they’re not crying, you’re convinced they’ve stopped breathing and probably need medical attention.

These little beings rule your world in a way that is debilitating, mesmerizing, totally unexpected and utterly consuming. It’s a double-edged sword of a specific kind of torture for the parent, one which I hear ends — somewhere around the time the child reaches the age of 32.

And if you think your mind was on the lam when you were pregnant, just wait ’til you give birth. During the first two weeks of your little extraterrestrial’s life you will not know what day it is, where you are, who you spoke to, what your telephone number is or where you live.

Elisa Donovan's Blog: How to Handle the First Week with Your Alien
Faking us out, feigning sleep – secretly about to erupt – Courtesy Elisa Donovan

The first day that Charlie went back to work, he came home in the afternoon to find me wandering around the house, crying, shuffling various items from room to room and mumbling.

As a mom you constantly feel like there is something you need to be taking care of every single second (because there is), so whenever the kiddie is having a blissful moment of rest, you want to take advantage of that 10 minutes to scrub the poop off the wall and brush your teeth and move the load of laundry into the dryer and wash the bottles and change the sheets and empty the dishwasher … and …

You will get by on adrenaline for an impressive amount of time, but there comes a moment when the sleep deprivation reaches a crescendo from which the only way down is a freefall nosedive into the muttering, puttering mess of goo that Charlie found me in.

“Ummm — E? I think you need to go to sleep,” he suggested.

After my initial resistance, and a few more tears (Yes, it’s okay if you cry more than your kid in the beginning. I certainly did), I acquiesced and let him walk me over to the bed and literally put me in it; all the while still mumbling, “…Where are the … I need to … diapers … laundry is … crib?”

Be not concerned. Things will even out, you will gain back your faculties and your mind will return to its prior state of brilliance — okay, yeah I don’t really think this part is true. My daughter is six months old and I still ask things like, “Who is that?” — referring to someone we just spent the evening with the night before, and “I never said that, I don’t remember ever having that conversation, Charlie” regarding a lengthy conversation I invariably had with Charlie not a few short hours before.

I have heard this behavioral phenomena referred to as “new mommy brain” and I have heard that this too, passes — around the time the mommy reaches the age of 82. At which point it is replaced by general senility which no one faults you for; in fact you get credit for simple longevity (rightfully so) and everyone marvels at your wisdom and awesomeness.

Elisa Donovan's Blog: How to Handle the First Week with Your Alien
Positive affirmations hat – Courtesy Elisa Donovan

So here is the real straight-up truth, with no idealistic sugar-coating: each terrifying and disastrous moment of those first weeks was, without exception, followed by a breath-taking, awe-inspired tear-jerker-of-a-beauty of a moment. Every single day consists of both.

And this my friends, is how the human race forges on. This is how we continue to procreate and evade extinction. Because there is the existence of the two. Somehow, that tiny little hand with its tiny little fingers gripping my comparatively giant-sized mitt, has the power to slay me — erasing my memory of the marathon sleep deprivation and the buckets full of spit up.

I so purely, entirely and unconditionally adore her. I didn’t know it was possible to love something so much.

If there is one thing I can recommend with complete assuredness and confidence based on my limited experience of pregnancy and giving birth and motherhood thus far, it’s this: Let go. Prepare as best you can, and then just let go of every expectation, hope, fear, need and idea of what’s going to happen. And everything will be perfect.

It is hard and scary to begin this whole new phase of life full of responsibility. It is stressful to try to predict what’s going to happen, while not knowing how the sweet little bean you’re carrying is going to enter the world, or how you are going to manage her arrival. But I have learned that the majority of all of this is beyond my control.

I had plans and beliefs about what I wanted to occur, of what stories I wanted to be able to tell. And thus far, very few of those things have wound up going down as I anticipated they would; and I have wound up with very different stories to share (believe me — I have birthing stories and breastfeeding debacles that in no way-shape-or-form were supposed to happen to ME! Don’t worry, we’ll go there in the upcoming blogs…).

I have tried to be at ease with all of it, and miraculously for the most part I have been. Because I believe it’s exactly the way it was meant to go. I believe my willingness to trust that, however it was all going to shake down was right, has really and truly served me more than anything else.

Elisa Donovan's Blog: How to Handle the First Week with Your Alien
Fierce love (note the dark circles under my eyes) – Courtesy Elisa Donovan

SO. What to REALLY expect in the first weeks of being a parent? Expect not to know what the holy heck is happening, but love it anyway. Expect in one moment to know exactly what you’re doing, and in the next to be convinced you are totally lost. Expect that nothing will go as planned, and everything will be perfect.

I might encourage you to trust. And I might beg you to have a sense of humor.

Have faith that whatever is happening is the right thing. Your baby is going to come into this world in exactly the way that he or she sees fit. Existence is inherently divine, so trust that you’re being taken care of.

Help your little bean to feel welcome to enter the world, and then let go. Just let go.

— Elisa Donovan

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Showing 88 comments

Acorr on

Loved it!!

edward russell on

cute baby

Kristie Lyn on

Your are an amazing writer and I truly love reading your blogs!

I just had my first baby …he is one month old! The car ride home and just being out of the hospital felt amazing. Being able to welcome your baby into home! Showing them all around the house! I loved every moment of it!

I totally did the same thing walking around the house starting one thing and then doing something else then going back to the first thing and I’m still doing it wondering when will my brain come back…how long will I feel like this?!! But it is worth every moment I took into my sons eyes falling in love with him all over again. Holding him for hours on the couch!

I did the same thing when my husband went back to work…he came home to me sitting on the couch crying my eyes out saying I don’t know if I can breastfeed am I doing this right?! Is he still hungry?! But I am learning slowly he will let me know if he is or if his diaper is wet or hello mom pick me up!

I look forward to your next blog! 🙂

Anonymous on

Great outlook on parenting and life! Love her posts.

Em on

I just loved this article. I am 5 months pregnant (today!) with my first, and am terrified of what’s going to happen, with all of these expectations & horror stories….I feel better after reading Elisa’s article. Thank you!! I also loved it, because my husband & I call the baby, “our little bean”. =)

Hen on

Waaah-hahaha! I was crying from laughing so hard at your post. Every bit true for a rookie “first-timer”. Been there, done that and 4 yrs later I look back on my first experience with my baby in those first few months and I miss it and don’t miss it at the same time.

I’m gonna love your blog- I can tell already. Congrats !!! Keep us moms enjoying and laughing. Like they say, if you don’t laugh you might cry! LOL Keep up the good work new momma.

K on

Loved this post–it is all such a bumbling mess at first, a blur of tears and sweats that you’ve worn for 48hrs straight, and painful boobs and….AWE at these little human beings who somehow are a nightmare and perfection all wrapped into one bundle of sweet smelling baby-ness!

Juill on

Loved this blog post!!!! So honest, funny, thoughtful…OMG! GREAT writing!

besimon on

Not to take anything away from your experience (being a mother is the hardest job ever), but we’ve been talking in the office this week about a diary entry I read from a pioneer woman. Her day went something like this: got up, made bread, milked cows, fed chickens, fed children, tilled field, HAD BABY, washed clothes, washed floors, etc. Thank goodness we live in this time.

Bugsmum on

Love this and 16mths down the track I remember is with a haze that only alcohol and sleep deprivation can cause.

I remember crying everyday for her first 2 weeks and can’t remember why, I do remember telling my poor husband NOT to be nice to me or hug me cause he’d make it [the crying] worse.

Thank you for sharing those beautiful photos with us all. She is stunning!

Loving your blog.

Mom2EnS on

Brava, Elisa! You told it like it is in the best possible way- with humor and gratitude, and just the right amount of reality. And thank you for sharing such gorgeous, natural photos of you and your baby. Makes this mom feel better!

Evie on

LOVE your blogs. You are such an amazing writer mama! I think every mother can relate to those few weeks that it will be unpredictable but blissful. Can’t wait to read more of you blogs!

stacey on

looooved this blog!! by far one of the best i have read!!

Monica on

Ah yes. I love it when people that don’t have kids list out the things they will NEVER do when they have kids. I like to laugh and say “If you say so.” cause it all goes out the window the minute that kid is born.

Pure adrenaline will get you thru about the first 3 weeks or so and love will get you you thru from 6 weeks on after you get your first smile from the baby that before only ate, slept, screamed and pooped. The joys of motherhood… But worth every darn second!

Evanie on

You are awesome. I love this. You had me literally Laughing Out Loud at my computer.

Learning to let go of preconceived expectations is probably the best advice you can give a new mom. That and an exercise ball you can sit on while bouncing your baby to sleep….(otherwise such a back-breaking endeavor!)

I’m so looking forward to your future posts!

Megan on

I usually don’t leave comments, but this blog is so good! The writing is fantastic and the point of view is refreshing, honest, and so accurate.

Thank you for describing the doubled sided -ness of having a child. So many blogs these days focus on the negatives of having a first child. Yes, its work! But they never reveal how tightly the good and bad are tied together during those first months.

STL-Sara on

I am only 6 weeks into my first pregnancy and hope you continue to blog for my entire 40 weeks and beyond! You are hilarious!

Allison on

I had my baby girl almost 5 weeks ago and EVERYTHING you wrote about in your blog this week is 100% true! Thank you!!!

Anon on

That may be the most beautiful, accurate description of that time that I’ve ever read. Spot on!

JC on

I really, really like Elisa’s blog and hope People can convince her to submit more often. The pregnancy and mood swing one was laugh out loud hilarious. I never knew she was so funny. And this one was just sweet and honest. Period. I love her writing style and can relate – times two!! Keep it up, I so enjoy her. 🙂

CDK on

That was perfect, and hysterical, and beautiful and just so so true. And the statements at the end were just beyond wisdom. Great blog.

Misty on

Love this blog!

tree on

This is the most realistic post on the first one week with a newborn I’ve come across in a long time…maybe ever. Great job. I’m saving it to remind me down the road. Thank you!

roxyb5 on

So true… So hilarious, thanks for sharing…

Ld626 on

Beautifully written, and as a mom of preemie twins who entered the world three months early and who just came home from the hospital – I feel exactly the same way.

Anonymous on

Loved this post! I really love the way she writes.

Jennifer on

Perfect! Absolutely perfect! Everything you said is so, so true! I was also crying from laughing and remembering like another poster said! Love it!

Kerry on

Love love it!

ges on

Wow its all so true. Love her writing.

Mick on

Beautiful, and so, so true. Now, wait until you have #2 AND a toddler to take care of as well. 🙂 I didn’t get dressed before noon for a year. There’s no sleeping when the baby sleeps, etc – you pass out at 5 am after being up most of the night with a newborn, and at 6:30 your toddler is up, hungry and ready to be entertained!

bcjen on

We are all perfect parents….til the baby comes out. Then reality sets in.

I absolutely loved your way of saying things. I suggest you YouTube a little video series – a “First Year of Life with My Parents” type of thing. (if you make loads of money of this I’d like some credit. I need the money to find the cure for Mommy Brain. My kid is 9 and I still haven’t returned to my former “brilliant” self pre-child. It could be the brain surgery I had, or my age (46) but I think it’s probably child-related. 😉 You can find me at badlycrafted.com)

Beth on

The biggest thing first timers (and every timer after that, really) can do is roll with the punches and get as much sleep as you can! I look back on the newborn days and wonder how I functioned before my 16 month old started sleeping through the night (which by the way, happened with no special “sleep training” at one year.) Best of luck to all the new and “old” mommies out there! It does fly by, so enjoy that which is enjoyable.

BNJ15 on

Thank you for your honestly describing the first weeks of motherhood. My son is now a year old and I’m just starting to gain back my footing. During those first few months I remember searching for a blog that made me feel like I wasn’t the only hot mess out there. I couldn’t find anything that truly described just how difficult the experience can be for new moms. I look forward to reading more of your truthful and hilarious stories in the future!

lstrz on

You hit the nail on the head! Awesome writing about the start of a new life with baby. Congrats!

Wendy on

lol – awesome blog! I remember when I was expecting my first son 19 years ago. He was due in June and I remember thinking how great it would be because he could sleep and I could garden and do yard work and it would be fantastic!

sigh…. He cried 24/7 and didn’t sleep through the night …. EVER!! I remember just lying on the couch nursing him and eating pbj sandwiches and crying for days. And then 13 months later, clearly sleep deprived!, we decided in our infinite wisdom we should try and get pregnant again. which we did… immediately. and had a repeat performance.

I think the first full night’s sleep we got was when our youngest son was 3 years old. Strangely I don’t remember many other details of those few years!

You definitely just have to roll with it and know that although some days you honestly do not think you will survive one more second without sleep, of course you will and suddenly they are young adults and leaving home and you would give anything to have those days back. 🙂

julia on

really, really, really loved this blog! loved everything she had to say… i can relate to everything and her positive attitude to trust the journey is something i have to keep doing even now with an 19 month old! thank you so much for sharing!

Lucille on

That was the most accurate baby blog I’ve ever seen on people!! Great job and hilarious!

Briana on

I also have a six month old little bundle of joy and I just want to say that pretty much everything in this blog is EXACTLY the same thing that we have been going through!! (and six months in it is still going on!)

molly.one on

I love her writing, her honesty and candid sense of humor! She is right- let go (when you can) and remember most things just will work themselves out. Forget about the clean floors and dishes for moments and either enjoy your baby or some much needed sleep! And it only gets crazier (but easier, too) as they get older. I have a 4 yr old and soon to be newborn boy again (next week!) and I just hope I can remember some of these things she has written b/c it does become a blur! Can’t wait for her next post!

Beach Mom on

Agree! Amen! Now back to those dishes, laundry, shower (yeah right!), scrubbing, dinner… Because baby is sleeping soundly and the monitor is glued to my ear :-). Congratulations on your precious baby and welcome to the ride of your life!!!

Anonymous on

This is a great blog. I love this : “when your baby is crying, you are terrified you’ve done something wrong and you must do something right immediately! But when they’re not crying, you’re convinced they’ve stopped breathing and probably need medical attention.” It is so true.

Sara on

This made me cry as it is EXACTLY what happens/is happening! My little peanut is three months and is the best thing ever! Even when throwing a complete fit! ha

Liv on

I have three kids aged 1 – 6 and I really love reading your blog Elisa, because it is honest and funny. It is the only baby blog I read because all the others annoy the CRAP out of me with their sanctimonious BS. The only advice I ever give other mothers is to “surrender” to it, which is exactly what you’ve just said here.

Anonymous on

I almost liked this post. The confusion and emotional roller-coaster sounds familiar… but then: Expect that nothing will go as planned, and everything will be perfect.

No, everything is not perfect. Your child can have colic, you can have post-natal depression, anything can go wrong and be too heavy to bear.

I think the important thing is to 1) be ready to accept that things don’t go as planned, 2) cherish the good moments, 3) listen to yourself carefully and 4) get help if you feel too lost.

Cathleen on

Love the name Scarlett! And a well written piece.

shannon on

Mom of 3 here with 4th due in jan. Article was cute, but i am totally dumbfounded at how “scary” and “terrifying” the first weeks were made out to be. Did the baby have respiratory problems? Why were you checking on her breathing every 5 seconds? Why were you worked up into tears? I don’t get it. Its a baby people, not an explosive device. Take a deep breath and CHILL.

She is totally beautiful.

N.H. on

I don’t have kids at the moment so I find all of this overwhelming but incredibly interesting at the same time.I love your posts and your outlook on the whole motherhood experience. You are a talented writer, looking forward to reading more….

Lana on

Thanks for the information. I am expecting my first in May.

Brandy on

I love your blog! It is so refreshing and makes me laugh so much b/c its all stuff my husband and I went through as well! I have a 4mth old baby girl and her name is Scarlet Avery! Great taste! 🙂

Sarah on

Yep all true!!!! I was horrified they let us leave the hospital with this tiny human and without either of us knowing what the heck we were doing!!! Thank goodness for grandparent to guide the way. Otherwise I would have totally lost it. Truly a wonderful and terrifying experience rolled into one.

Amy on

Wow we apparently lived the same first few weeks after bringing home a baby! Thanks for your honesty and sense of humor! My daughter is 2 1/2 and we just did it all over with my son who is 8 weeks! They are so incredibly worth every rough moment.

Harley on

Holy hilarity, Batman! That was a fabulous blog entry!!! You have a penchant for writing 🙂

aprilmama on

Amen, sister!

gillian on

Absolutely right! Brought tears to my eyes how absolutely correct she is. I am not the eternal optimist and still my thoughts of what should be, and what actually happened were the same. wow. Guess im not the only one, and cant wait to go through the craziness again!

Still Life in San Francisco on

You are such an amazing writer, Elisa!!

I am seven months pregnant, and you basically have me scared to death. 😉 I suppose we’ll get by!

momtothebup on

As a first time mom to a soon to be 1 year old I feel like I am just now coming up for breath.

At one point during those first few weeks my husband came home to me bouncing on the exercise ball, half naked, nursing my daughter and crying because I couldn’t get her to stop crying and sleep long enough to get a shower.

Now that its all over I miss her being so small.

Great blog and a spot on description of those first few weeks.

Anonymous on

I haven’t enjoyed reading a blog this much in ages! Love her sense of humor. Amber, Amber, who knew? 😉

Diane on

I couldn’t agree more. No matter which # child it is that comes home (I have done it 4 times), the feelings are the same. It terrifying the first time, after that isn’t only scary.

The first year is the most amazing, because when I started on the journey I didn’t know anything about the “little alien” I brought home or how would I figure out what needs to be done? By the end of 12 months, I had a beautiful little person who was mobile, could communicate in some way, had (and still does) opinions, and a fabulous personality. Best journey I have ever taken.

lorraine on

Love this post. So honest and true!

Samantha Grant on

I have to say that was so awesome to read and so true. I am gonna have my daughter read this… she is almost 10 weeks along right now and the biggest worrier that I know. But maybe reading this will help her be at ease when the baby comes. Thank You for bein so open & honest!!! Its very refreshing!

&& Congrats. She is a beauty! 🙂

JE on

Enjoyed your blog! As a mom of two, those times are sweet, but I have no desire to experience them again. Pure exhaustion. I would highly recommend the Angel Care monitor to get some sleep though. Best investment ever!

lovely123 on

When you look at how innocent a baby/child is you wonder how or why anyone would want to hurt something so precious.

4mom on

What a little cutie! You are very accurate in your blog about what to expect. I fell asleep in the recliner while my newborn was nursing and when the phone rang I jerked her arm that I was holding. Of course she cried and I cried and when my husband came home I told him I was the worst mother EVER! He just looked at me and took the baby and told me to go to bed. It was definitely what I needed. It does get easier or maybe we just get better at managing. I have four now and the youngest two are 13 and 27 months. I don’t get bothered by too many things anymore, and I also don’t get very much done. I LOVE IT! They will grow up and move out someday so enjoy every second.

Dawn on

Lol! Exactly right, Elisa. It gets better, but it never, ever ends. The terrors just change. Your daughter is beautiful. I love the name Scarlett. You made me smile and get teary-eyed in the time it took to read your blog. Huggles!

Vanessa G on

I loved the blog. I found it fun, easy to read… However I also hope that people won’t take it as the only accurate portrayal of how the first weeks with your newborn are. I had my son after 36 hours of labor which were not as terrible as people imagine. Was I in pain, some. Did I take the epidural-no. The hospital staff were great and I’m truly glad they were there to coach us, come to the house a day after I came home from the hospital for a follow-up visit…

The truth is, my husband was there with me every step of the way, we were able to rest because he helped me. Yes I breastfed for 14 months (even when I went back to work). I think what I often read is moms who are overwhelmed because the dad is not involve enough since the beginning.

I remember I was told you won’t be able to go to the restaurants, movies, happy hour or anything else when you have a child. I also thought yeah that’s not true and I was right. I received the best advice from a mother whose kids were so well behaved, so self sufficient. She told me to let my husband help even if he doesn’t do things my way even if it’s not exactly how I would do them. It’s the best piece of advice I can give anyone, because is the best piece of advice I was given.

If we keep stepping in when our husbands, boyfriends, partner want to help and not letting them do things, they will stop offering to help and that’s when mothers become overwhelmed… Parenting is a team effort and support. If one doesn’t have a husband, mothers, sisters, friends are more often than not there to help us. We just need to be willing to accept their help and not try to be superwoman. It’s ok for us not to be perfect.

abbyreph on

You are a very talented writer! I’m impressed.

angelina on

@Shannon, you have never checked a sleeping baby just to make sure it was still breathing? Wow, most mothers, do that…I think that is normal. I’m pretty sure it is one of the biggest fears of your sleeping newborn when you are a new parent. Respiratory problems or not.

mamay on

@angelina… shannon points out that she is the mother of 4. Once you have that many kids, each successive one is no big deal. Moms with lots of kids like to pretend they even treated the first one like that…. but we know better.

Stephanie Reed on

Let me just say, out of all the bloggers, I absolutely love Elisa’s the best. I smile/laugh/cry with each one, and I think the pictures are absolutely beautiful!!! (Yes, even the one with “dark circles.”) Amazing blog, amazing woman, and amazing mother. Thank you for taking the time to write this blog, Elisa. 🙂

Isabelle on

I love your blog and your writing! It’s hilarious and true and sweet at the same time. My children are 13 and 10 now and I still remember those first months with a mixture of nostalgia and terror. Funny you mention asking for a vowel. One night, I was breastfeeding and half unconscious, and every time my baby would latch on and off, in my mind I’d see a Wheel of Fortune contestant spinning the wheel and asking for a vowel. Good times! 😉

Cathy on

I just had my third and fourth ( that’s right, twins!) and I will say, I was so silly, thinking it would get easier, but it hasn’t. What is true, though, is that I love them so much, that in the day light hours, and sometimes in the night ;-), it’s all totally worth it.

RainDance on

What an awesome blog. Loved this.

Amanda on

Normally I do not bother with commenting on these blogs being that I still do not have children but I felt compelled to express my gratitude to Elisa Donovan for writing this blunt, but respectful look at being a new mommy.

Thank you Elisa for writing on your experience so far and keep up with the blog- your writing style is very eloquent and amazing- but get that sleep when you can, even if its only for 5 minutes from what I hear LOL. Scarlett is such a beautiful baby 🙂

momaswell on

You need to have a blog every week! You are my favorite of all the bloggers because you are hysterical and dead on!


lol this was awesome! i am 6 month pregnant with my first, very excited and scared of what may come but this article was great! thanks for sharing! 🙂

Janeen on

Love her blog!!

Big Fan on

Cute little baby

stephcomfort on

Basically the best “Mom” blog ever written on this site. I was truly impressed and entertained.

d on

LOVE this. well said. i felt exactly all of this with my first, but could never have articulated it as well. beautiful pictures!!!

Karen on

One of the best blogs I’ve read on the first few weeks with baby! Great job.

Mimi on

Beautifully written…can’t wait to read your next blog. =)

Jamie on

What a beautifully written blog! All of your words are totally relatable and utterly truthful! I look forward to reading your future posts!

Meredith on

I love this! I’m a mom to 2 daughters, the eldest being 7 and the youngest is 5. Elise’s experience sounds *exactly* like my own with our first. I would hover over her pack n play just to make sure she was breathing. I lost my mind and much sleep. And I can totally relate to breaking down and crying, while walking around the house muttering to yourself. A very funny yet candid post about what it’s like to be a first time mom!

Charli on

This was awesome. It was funny and heart warming. The pics are beautiful! My favorite part-One of the sick ironies of new parenting is that when your baby is crying, you are terrified you’ve done something wrong…But when they’re not crying, you’re convinced they’ve stopped breathing and probably need medical attention

loveslit.blogspot.com on

Wow. Shaking my head and laughing at the part where you write that if the baby is crying, you’re convinced you’re doing something wrong, and if they’re sleeping peacefully, you’re terrified, wondering if they’re still breathing. You captured those early days beautifully.

Lynn on

This is some of the best writing I’ve ever read on People. Thanks for sharing, Elisa!

Tyson Harold on

wow very nice.

Valerie Jensen on

Great story! I loved when you said things will even out. It seems like they always do. My daughter is pregnant with our first grandchild and I tell her when your baby comes just trust and have faith in your instincts and that is what you said. I love that. Thanks