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Lisa Kudrow’s Son Julian Never Wants Siblings

07/16/2012 at 11:00 AM ET
Chris Delmas/Visual Press

Lonely only? Not so for Lisa Kudrow‘s son Julian Murray.

During a Monday appearance on Bethenny, the former Friends star shared that her 14-year-old son isn’t looking for his parents to expand their tight-knit trio — not now, not ever!

“He doesn’t want siblings. Since he could talk he’d say, ‘No, no I don’t want a sister or a brother,’” the actress, 48, recalls. “Someone would get pregnant and he’d say, ‘But you’re not, right?’”

Still, Kudrow admits the future of an only child has her feeling sorry for her son.

“I feel bad. Only because he alone will have to deal with his parents when they’re old,” she says of herself and husband Michel Stern.

But, according to the Web Therapy actress, it seems as if her teenager already has a solution to the parent problem.

“Hopefully he’ll marry someone with a nice family too and he’ll have a family,” she explains. “He wants to have a lot of kids.”

– Anya Leon

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Showing 155 comments

Shannon on

Spoiled child alert.

J on

^^ Yep.

Kayte on

Yes, I would be concerned about a child who demanded that his parents not have any other children. That is obviously not a child’s decision and indicates that he always wants to be the center of attention. I hope their decision not to have more children wasn’t based on Julian’s input.

Lau on

I doubt they decided only based on what Julian wanted! But it’s good if they took his thoughts into consideration, I believe.

What’s wrong with not wanting siblings anyway? I never did either and I’m far from spoiled. Life as an only child is very enjoyable, as I’m sure is life with brothers and sisters.

I’m sure Lisa and her partner never wanted another child too badly, because if they did they would’ve had another.

Amber on

Creepy, weird, and wrong. I would never let my children make decisions about my reproductive life.

Alysssa on

People are so stupid and judgemental sometimes. You see children with siblings being as spoilt as only children, it’s about parenting, not about having siblings to fight over toys with. If you’re a lousy parent, it does not matter how many children you have, you’ll still raise spoilt children. Fending the “only child” stigma is a terrible reason to have a second child, as is the first born asking for a sibling.

kirsty on

My daughter is five and has also said she does not want a brother or a sister. I am not letting her decide if we have anymore kids, that is up to us! She may be a only child but she is certainly not spoiled and I really hate that people always think that!

pollyhanaha on

Sounds normal to me. I believe as a child gets older & is an only child they would not want to share Mom and Dad. But! I highly doubt that had he been “presented” with a sibling that he would have turned up his nose at them. I feel he would have loved that baby and be thrilled to be an older brother.

meghan on

My oldest brother used to tell my mom he should be an only child. Her response would always be to get pregnant. He’s gotten used to the three of us, though. ;)

Tam on

My husband and I are both only children and we talk about having one kid vs. two. We were both fine growing up as only children and neither of us are spoiled.

Mina on

I am one of 4 and I hate it. I cant stand my siblings. I hate that whenever I get something, they bytch that I’m spoiled because I’m the baby. Which makes getting gifts and favors stressful for me…I walk on eggshells. I always say I dont care what they think, but it hurts to be called names by your own family. It sucks to share EVERYTHING growing up. Never had privacy. We arent “close” even tho we are all close in age. We never had special moments or talked or stuck up for one another.

I thought maybe we were just crazy, but my boyfriend is the same way with his sibs. They just dont have the bond. We are closer with our friends.

I really resent people who have multiple kids and say that only children are lonely…or they gave their kid siblings as a gift or things like that. Yea, it can be a gift and they can get along….but it can also go the other way. Its a 50/50 chance. Not ALL families with multiple children automatically get along.

Mommytoane on

Meh, I think shes using it as an “Ok” to not have more kids, more than saying she went with what her kid wanted.
As far as being the only one taking care of parents…a lot of times it comes down to one kid in the family doing a blunt of the work. I’ve seen many large families go through this and its always the same. One kid does all the work…the rest expect part of the will.

Nancy on

Leave the poor kid alone. My only child says he doesnt want siblings either and he is the farthest from spoiled there is. We are CONSTANTLY getting compliments about how sweet, inclusive and kind he is and how he ALWAYS shares. He is 10 years old. He is a happy, productive child.

For some of you ignorant people’s information, we couldnt have bio kids and we could only adopt one. We did not have a choice. But you make the best of the situation you are in and we ADORE our ONLY child.

Also, I have a sibling and we dont get along and she would never be there for me in a crisis. So thinking that a child HAS to have a sibling to be with him in adulthood is ridiculous!!

Amy on

That’s truelly a horrible thing to put out there about your child. It really doesn’t infer anything positive or enlightened about your child, so this statement doesn’t sit right with me.
My children are 10 years apart and I hate the bad rep that only children get! They say anything remotely selfish ( because children are never selfish, right?) and are deemed bratty.
Unfortunately Lisa isn’t helping the situation.

Stupid comment, stupid topic!

Kim on

I think the way this article was framed it makes her son sound like a selfish brat dictating the mom’s choices. He may not want a sibling taking away Mom’s attention now, but as he gets older I think he will regret not having a brother or sister to share memories with. Family functions will be lonely when there are no siblings around. I look forward to holidays and family events if I know my brother and his family are going to be there so that we can all be together and the kids will be able to play with their cousins. It just brings more to the table once he gets married! Not to mention when the parents get old and eventually pass, he will have a sibling there to help him cope and make decisions. Just saying!

Barbi on

The article makes him sound like a spoiled, selfish brat. I would adopt triplets and teach him about sharing and caring.

Hea on

I’m an only child and I never wanted siblings. Didn’t get any either. It was not about being spoiled or craving all the attention. I just never wished for anyone to come into our tight knit trio. Lucky for me, no one ever did.

Eliza on

To me, he doesn’t sound spoiled in the least. I’m an only child, and when I was a kid I really, really didn’t want siblings. I’m not sure why I felt that way, really, it just seemed natural to me that I was an only child. (I must add that my parents never based their family planning decisions on my childhood opinions, but I ended up being an only child anyway, and I’m still perfectly content with that.)

JM on

Wow some people here have some real problems with reading comprehension. she doesn’t say that the reason they never had any more kids was BECAUSE he didn’t want any siblings. she’s just saying that he’s happy being an only child. for christ sake, perhaps people here could at least pretend they have a very basic ability to read, you know, people might think you are a little bit dense otherwise.

as far as siblings go for myself personally, i have one brother and i adore him, always have. sure we would argue sometimes, but i have never for a second doubted how much i love him and how much he loves me. i have never wanted to be an only child and always felt a bit sorry for those who are. almost all of my friends who are only children wish they had had a sibling.

jessicad on

He doesn’t sound spoiled at all in my opinion, and she’s so funny and such a good actress. I see nothing wrong with having one child and giving them all of your attention, I know plenty of people who have siblings and are spoiled rotten. To each their own though, we all want different things. I miss Friends and wish they would do a reunion!

Amy on

Umm last I checked, my kids didn’t get to decide if I wanted to expand my family. This kid is obviously rotten to the core and very selfish!!!!

Doreen on

It’s NOT up to this child to make the decisions! She’s such a flake that I wouldn’t be surprised she listens to her child about this. Ridiculous and the child seems selfish.

nicole on

she can adopt if she wants cause 48-old baby wise unless the next kids a surprise lol

Mina on

Just because you dont want siblings doesnt make someone selfish, it makes them human! Friends are just as easy to come by. I have lifelong friends who were there for me when I needed them. I dont need siblings (even tho I have them). They never give me the time of day and treat me like crap even as adults just like they did when we were kids.

Bringing another kid into a structured, scheduled life is HARD not only on the parents but on the sibling. You think you get stressed as parents?? Your other child gets stressed too…just in a different way.

When he is trying to do his homework and the baby is screaming crying, its a distraction on his academics. When the baby touches his stuff, breaks his stuff, and tries to steal his stuff, its stressful on him. When the baby wakes up in the middle of the night crying and wakes him up, he gets tired the next day at school and falls asleep or cant concentrate. Having to share personal beloved things because its the right thing to do, or cuz mom n dad say so (its nice to share). Rarely any privacy. Sometimes its really sucks having siblings.

I think Julian sounds like a very mature boy who knows how he feels and isnt afraid to communicate with his parents about his desires, concerns, and thoughts. Thats a good quality. So he is being bashed for being honest? Good Lord!

Lila on

So it’s ok to have another child because your existing child is asking for a sibling, but it’s not ok to listen to their opinion if they enjoy being the only child? Gotcha (rolls eyes).

I was an only child and loved it. My daughter is also an only child and loves it. She has expressed to us she doesn’t want siblings. Just as many kids express to their parents that they do want siblings.

There is nothing wrong with being an only child, or enjoying being an only child. There is nothing selfish about feeling your family is complete when YOU feel it is complete. I hate that people equate having one child with being selfish, and I hate even more those children are labeled spoiled and lonely. I know several spoiled and lonely people who had siblings.

joan on

From the interview, it sounds like Lisa never wanted another child and her son was just happy with it. and NOT that they did it for him.

nattya61 on

Good for them. Being an only child is a gift. We wouldn’t have it any other way in our family either.

crescentmoon on

And WHO said that because of him they decided not to have more? Maybe she couldn’t or her husband couldn’t. They are the only ones that can make the choice and change it. Lisa is a very smart woman- not dumb enough to think “Oh, this is what my child wants, this he will get.”

Tara on

“The article makes him sound like a spoiled, selfish brat. I would adopt triplets and teach him about sharing and caring.”

Yes! Please just adopt kids you don’t want to teach your child a lesson. That is obviously the smarter choice than valuing your childs opinion about something that would affect his life.

Lisa and her husband are both very smart people. I believe he is a scientist? I am sure they weighed the pros and cons of having more children and decided against it. Good for them for knowing what they want and not caving under the “you must have at least two” pressure.

Alex on

I would never be concerned about a child who said he/she didn’t want his/her parents to have anymore children. For an older sibling, do you know what it’s like to have all the attention from your parents and then have that removed? How would you feel if your spouse brought someone home and said, “Honey, I wanted to have another wife/husband.” Yes, I understand it’s not the same thing, but it really is. We are all individuals with different wants and needs. Some people need/want someone of the same sex. Some people need/want someone of the opposite sex. Some people long to have siblings. Some people don’t long to have siblings. This boy expressed his opinion, which he is entitled to. Whether the parents act on it is up to them. But I am a mother of an only child, and if someone wants to call my son names based upon his only status, be my guest. I couldn’t care less. But it’s amazing how many of you have a stereotype of only children when you don’t even know the child. Shame on you.

Vicky on

I actually never wanted my parents to have any more kids after me, and demanded that. I’m the youngest of 3, and grew up hearing my brother and sister say that they didn’t get enough attention because of me. Truthfully, I loved/love my parents, but they were always good at giving attention to one child at one time.

Sandy on

THIS is a typical reaction of a parent who has SPOILED her child rotten, either that or she has put it in his head not to want a sibling because she does not want to have another! I don’t thing you let your child make the decsions- that’s the parents job. Good luck with this kid cuz it’s gonna always be about what he wants.

Jay on

I found nothing wrong with her son’s statement. Maybe because I am an only child I might be a little bit biased but you never know what happens. You have as many kids as you can take care of. In my case, I was a miracle baby born to older parents. If my parents could have had more they probably would have but they were terribly lucky to have me. These comments saying he is spoiled and what not are ridiculous….its not said in a mean spirited way, just he doesn’t want other siblings.

blu on

LOL, her son kind of looks like a young David Schwimmer.

Britt on

I don’t see anything wrong with what he said. I was the same way. Granted, most of my friends had so many siblings, they hardly fit into their houses (I was home schooled, so a lot of my friends had 8 or 9 siblings), so I had some fears. My parents never did have any other kids, but that was their decision – not mine. I don’t automatically label a child like that as “spoiled”. Children who are not grateful – those are spoiled children.

ecl on

What is the obsession on this blog (on this post and in general) with calling other people’s children (that you all know nothing about) spoiled? First of all, kids will be kids. So your kids never put a foot out of place? Fat chance.

Second of all, why aren’t kids allowed to express opinions? I am happy to let my son express his. It doesn’t mean I always listen to him, but sometimes I do. It’s called respecting a member of the family. Some of you are too obsessed with having ultimate control over your children. Lighten up!

Karen F. on

I am the oldest of six children, my husband is the second of five. We ended having four children. I don’t think it would have bothered him whether we had one or four. I know that none of my children were deprived and they have turned out to be good adults. There are people who are better off just having one child.Having one or four children is a lot of work.

Jenn on

I think she was joking around and a lot of you are taking this waaaaaaaaaaaay too seriously. I laughed when I watched the video.

Alex on

Sandy, your post is incredibly ignorant. Do you have an education?

Ramona on

Amber – how is this any different than the kids who beg for a baby brother or sister? Isn’t that letting the child dictate your reproductive life as well?

I highly doubt the opinions of children really factor that much into parents’ decisions. But it’s good to hear of an adolescent who is actually happy and content with his life and not whining about what he doesn’t have!

Anonymous on

Kim- My mother is an only child, and as she would be the first to tell you, her family get-togeters are anything but boring! She may not have siblings, but she DOES have cousins whom she is very close to (so close, in fact, that she always says she considers them to be her siblings rather than her cousins!). So for her, family get-togethers are a time for her to catch up with and have fun with her cousins (unfourtnately, they all live pretty far from her now).

Mommytoane- You hit the nail on the head! My father has two siblings, but after his mother died, he shouldered pretty much sole responsibility for helping his ailing father (his older sibling lived pretty far from their father and his younger one had issues of her own). So having a sibling definitely does not always guarantee that you will have help once your parents become elderly and start depending on you more and more!

As for this article, I don’t see anything wrong with what Lisa’s son said. She also never once said that it was because of his preference that she and her husband never had more kids. So I think that calling him spoiled for saying he doesn’t want siblings is a huge leap to make.

All of that said, what I find most amazing is that Lisa has a 14-year-old…and is still married to his father! Sadly, that seems like such a rarity in Hollywood these days!

Seriously?!? on

I’m an only child and I HATED it! I also graduated with 4 other only child girls and we had a pact that we’d grow up and never put our kids thru the same thing. One of them actually stayed with her husband an extra few months, just to get pregnant, since they only had one child at the time. Sadly, she knew she wanted to divorce him but desperately didn’t want her daughter to be an only child like she was. :(

When people I know have one and are thinking of having another, I always encourage them to do so.

The “lonely only” isn’t so much a myth in my circle.

Just my opinion/perspective.

indira on

Im an only child and i too find it weird when kids make that demand of their parents but, kids can be prone to jealousy. I’d find it more bizarre if the parents considered the childs opinion in the process. Please.

Hea on

@ Amy – SERIOUSLY? Rotten to the core? Because of what you misinterpret nonetheless. How horrible of you to say so.

Rena on

I see nothing wrong with not wanting siblings. To be honest, I never wanted siblings. Only children are awesome, in my opinion.

KD on

I don’t find a thing wrong w/this child being honest…she didn’t say she allowed him to rule her thoughts did she? Wow people here really read into stuff. I have one child and he will be an only child, my choice, I don’t think it’s his responsibilty to take of me or his father when we are old. An only child doens’t mean a child is lonely or lacking ppl in his/her life, having siblings doesn’t mean life is perfect, I know many who have siblings that don’t get along, don’t talk, etc….

Lila on

I think it’s sad that a happy, well rounded child is called “spoiled” just because he IS happy with his life. I guess he should be whining and complaining about how he NEEDS siblings. Would that make you guys happy?

Birgit on

I was raised as only child. I always wanted to have a little sister or brother but my mom could not have more kids. I accepted. Now I raise my only child – boy now almost 10 years old. My son wants to have a little brother or sister. I’d love to have one more but could not as we were struggling after my son was born as I was 37 years old. Honestly it is nice to be an only child as get attention and affection from parents. For me, right now, it is better to have one kid…as I am happy as long as my son is healthy. I enjoy watching my son growing.

Kim on

Every only child that I know HATED it and made sure they had more than one child of their own so their kids wouldn’t have to go thru what they went thru..most of their complaints are that friends come and go but a sibling is always with you and also that they always felt like an adult b/c they are always aloen with their parents and never really felt like a kid, among other reasons, but mainly they just were really lonely..even with lots of friends and cousins it’s not the same as having a sibling sharing a home and memories with you..

Lila on

Well Kim, I was an only and LOVED it. So many perks! And I had tons of friends that I am still close to even know that I am almost 40. I was never lonely, never bored.

So there you go, you now know an only child that didn’t hate it. And if you read the previous comments, you will see there are plenty more- including Julian.

Kim on

That’s great that you guys are so happy being only children. I just think it’s great to have a bigger family with lots of siblings, cousins, etc. as I have had a positive experience with that, and maybe if you would have had them you would be positive about it also..but everybody has different experiences in life.

Lila on

And maybe you would have liked being an only child Kim. You never know. But the fact is that HE is happy being one, and that should be all that really matters. He shouldn’t be forced to have siblings because someone else thinks he maybe would be happier.

It’s great when people are happy in there lives, and it’s not up to us to tell them they shouldn’t be.

donna on

i have three children…20, 18, and 6. The two eldest children were more like twins because of their close age but the 6 yr old is almost like an only child because of the major age difference between her and the two oldest…if i were a little younger I would definitely consider giving her a sibling because being an only child is lousy..she has no one to play with or confide in as she would had she a sibling closer to her in age…

Nana on

Wow, so much judgement! I have a sibling and we have never been close, despite being only 2 years apart in age. I was spoiled rotten as a child. I now have a 9 year old daughter and I decided very early on that I would not have any more, AND, my daughter has always said that she didn’t want siblings. My decision to stop at one was very personal, but some of the factors included financial health, mental health (my own..lol) and family dynamics among a few. I am always talking to other “onlies” and doing research and I have found that the majority of onlies are VERY happy that they were only children and research has shown that only children are less likely to cave into peer pressure (because the relate to mom and dad’s morals and values vs. peers), are usually more aticulate and open to new ideas. It ultimately comes down to how your child is raised. I continually get people who question my decision, which absolutely floors me!! Who are you to judge?

Amanda on

Great for them! Having siblings has its pros and cons. I loved having brothers and sisters, but its all I ever knew, so I couldn’t compare it to anything else. I was the third child, and two more came after me. I hated all the teasing and fighting, but overall I’m glad I have my brothers and my sisters in my life.

Its just all what someone is used to. I feel like I will forever have this unbreakable bond with four other people for the rest of my life, I think that’s pretty amazing! We all don’t talk all the time, but I know if I needed anything all of them would be there for me. I have had many friends come and go, but my sisters and brothers will be there for me no matter what.

Emry on

I didnt know she was married or had a kid, i loved her on friends!!!!!!

Amy Caires on

When I was growing up, I wished I was an only child. I still do, even now. I’ve never gotten along with my sister.

NM on

First of all, it’s NOT the child’s role to say whether his parents expand their family or not. Second, this is a VERY spoiled rich kid. Just an observation from reading this article. Why else would he not want a sibling? If he gets all of the attention from his parents, and anything he wants, and a sibling comes along, guess who then gets all of the attention?

NM on

@Lau-You may be an only child and weren’t spoiled, but the difference between you and Lisa’s son is, that he’s the child of a celebrity. I don’t think you have that “luxury”.

Kim on

Sounds like she’s letting her child rule the home. What business is it of his rather or not his parents chooes to have another child. And trust me, just because you have more than one child it doesn’t mean they will ALL step up to care for aging parents. My sister does NOTHING for my elderly Mother. It’s all left to me to do.

MRJ on

How did we get spoiled rotten and DEMANDED no siblings from this article. He just said he didn’t want any siblings. There is not enough info in this story to determine he is spoiled.

danelle on

most kids dont want brothers or sisters but dont mean they dont love them . i was raised the second of five kids we were all close growing up now we hardly ever speak we not on bad tearms but just have our own lives.

Ayla on

I’m sure if she wanted more kids she would have them. I seriously doubt she is letting her 14 year old son tell her she can’t have children. She never said “We aren’t having anymore children because my son doesn’t want a sibling”. She’s just stating that her son doesn’t want a sibling.

Karen on

I laughed at the people that posted that he is spoiled or weird that he didnt want a sibling. Most parents TELL their children how great it will be to have a sibling because THEY want one. If the child is told the truth, they will never have their parents to themselves again, no child would ever want a sibling. I gave my child a sibling because I wanted one not because I made her think she wanted a sibling.

Carmen on

I think she is taking for her child. Who is the adult here?

dee on

As an only child he might want to reconsider. Unless you marry someone with siblings you’ll never be an uncle. It can be very lonely and when your parents get older the decision making can be hard to bare alone. Such as a decision on if a parent should be taken off life support. When your parents are gone you are alone unless you have a great extended family as I do. Sometimes being an only child is the only option for parents like mine that wanted more but it didn’t happen. Then you have to listen to people’s ugly remarks the rest of your life about spoiled only kids.

Athina on

Most people I know that have siblings only see them at family dinners. I guess there’s more to fill the seats around the table. Otherwise, they don’t appear to be good for much else.

Charli on

I don’t think she is saying her son dictated but there are a number of considerations to having additional children. Sometimes parents have more than one child for the children and she didn’t have that pressure. I think it’s cool. You people are too judgmental and read too much into stuff.

Lala on

As someone that feels family is very important, my worry would be once his parents pass. I’m sure he has a great extended family, and will probably marry, but having siblings to lean on is wonderful.
I also find it interesting, that he wants a lot of kids — but isn’t interested in his parents having more kids.

Cinder Lou on

My sister (2½ years older) never wanted a sibling either, and actually wrote in her college memoirs that her life as she knew it changed for the worse when I came along. She and I have never gotten along, and my parents never seemed to intervene when she exerted her will over me. Make no mistake: I’m glad I’m here. Had I been given the choice, though, I might have voted for ‘no siblings’ either.

Diana on

This is a little different but my sister just had her 3rd child and her oldest boy told her over and over he DID NOT want a little sister. He only wanted brothers he told her that he wouldn’t help if she had a girl and guess what she had a girl and he is the biggest help and the little girl lights up when she sees her older brother.

I doubt that Lisa and her hubby let their son decide. And i doubt that if she did have another child he would have been upset. Kids say all sorts of things. They are just stating how they feel. She is the parent and she decides if they have another child.

KrisAnn on

I’m an adult only child. It was alright when I was younger. I did always want a brother or sister. I wasn’t completely spoiled with gifts but with time from my family. They always had me at the center of everything.

I never wanted an only child, I always wanted siblings and lots of children. While I have a wonderful immediate family, I no longer have parents. They passed away much too early and with no siblings, I feel lonely for childhood memories with someone. However I see the turmoil with my husband’s siblings and I’m glad I don’t have that added stress.

jones on

I think her comment probably has to do with the fact that people bug her about only having one and ask whether he every asked for sibilngs. I doubt they decided not to have other children merely b/c of what he wanted, but rather made their decision and use his response to deflect criticism that he feels deprived for not having siblings.

Me on

Oh THAT’d be the day that my children would tell me whether they’d grant permission for more children. And she thought that was just fine and dandy? Perhaps she needs some therapy on who the parent is and who the child is.

L ANN on

I loved Lisa Kudrow playing Phoebe on Friends…..but can’t stand her as a real life person. Sorry Lisa. I’m sure it’s not going to make or break her day.

Trish on

I am the mother of an only child. It took 5 years for me to conceive him. My husband and I always felt bad that we didn’t give him a sibling but we used to always ask his opinion if he wanted a sibling and he always stated no. He enjoyed being an only child and he was happy with the way our family was. He used to always say that once you have perfection, why would you want another child-lol.

He is 19 yrs old now and he has always been a great child. We have never had any problems with him, he is very appreciative of everything he has been given. Still to this day when he gets up from dinner, he thanks us and when we do the grocery shopping he thanks us. How many kids do that? So to say an only child is spoiled and a brat is just plain idiotic.

I agree with the post that state even kids with siblings can be spoiled and brats-believe me, I know a few. My son has a very good friend that he grew up and that we consider our 2nd son. He goes on vacation with us every year and he calls us mom and pop and I believe he will always be there for my son and for us so sometimes a friend can be closer than a sibling.

I think everyone should feel blessed that they have children because there are alot of people who can’t and we shouldn’t be so quick to judge other peoples lives.

Marge on

Holy crap she’s 48?! She looks fantastic! And I feel bad for him. He’s going to regret it when he’s older. It’s not about taking care of his parents but having someone around that you know will always be there no matter what. I may not get along swimmingly with my brother but I know he will always be there for me.

seriously. on

People readers scraping the bottom of the barrel as usual. Lets compare my five year old only child to your multiples in a stressful situation and see who wins the well behaved child award. She has great manners, more than i can say for some of the “adults” here.

Kat on

Her being 48 years old probably suggests that more children are not forthcoming. If she’d REALLY wanted more kids, she should have had them earlier in her life AND her son probably wouldn’t have had an actual opinion (that mattered) about the subject. Also, this kid wants all the cash that she’ll inevitably leave behind.

gracie on

If I was 14 again, I wouldn’t want a new sibling either at that point!

ifyouonlyknew on

I grew up an only child and never cared one way or the other. To say that a kid is spoiled or that she’s hurting him because he’s an only child is plain….STUPID!!!!! I had tons of cousins and friends around all the time. I never lacked in anything because my parents have always been a TEAM and they raised me in a way that I never felt something was “lacking” in my life. I love that she says tight knit trio…I always felt (feel) like that. The 3 musketeers! Bottom line…what works for one family may not work for another, who is anyone to judge.

Daisy on

What a bunch of judgmental, holier-than-thou, smug jerks.

Melisa on

I bet her son is actually a sweet kid….but she should have had a little more foresight before she let this article come out. Obviously people are only going to assume the worst of him.

Eliza on

The alacrity with which people are willing to say nasty things about a child whom they’ve never met and aren’t likely to meet really surprises me. He’s a kid who’s happy with the way his life is – that’s a wonderful thing! And, as many have pointed out (but many others have neglected to notice), Lisa never said that her son’s opinions had any bearing on her family planning. In my experience, happy families come in all different sizes.

Jenny on

To each his/her own, but seldom does a child, even at 14 know what they will want in a few years. One word of warning, if he finds a nice gal with a big family like Lisa says, you won’t be seeing him much unless you plan on spending all the holidays at his wife’s house, because that’s where they’ll want to be!

Chris on

I’m an only child and yes I had to deal with the issues of my mother’s declining health at the end. I hated it cried, and cried over decisions I had to make. But, there was a silver lining in the end I didn’t have siblings who were fighting with the decisions I made. No one was there to fight over anything. Growing up I never even thought one way or the other whether I had a sibling, never thought about it till I was grown. And the only child syndrome, that’s a crock. I was not spoiled in the least, I was disciplined (spankings reigned back then). I grew up to be a nice unspoiled and very giving person. So people give up on the stigma you put on us onlys.

Anna on

How convenient. How very, very, incredibly convenient. Lisa is obviously assuaging her own guilt for devoting herself to her career (which never really materialized after Friends) and not having another child by falsely (yes, it’s false if you know any kids at all) proclaiming that this is what her CHILD WANTED. “I’m such a great parent because I abided by my son’s wish that he never have a sibling!” I call b*ll cy*t on this wholeheartedly. The child decided nothing. Please, fellow posters, do not fall for that. Having one child was HER decision.

Lisa, please do not make excuses for having only one child. Your own choices for your life are perfectly acceptable especially in this day and age. There is nothing wrong with your decision to have only one child. If you have a problem with YOUR decision to have only one child, then please talk to someone about it, but please, please do not ever put this on your one child publicly or privately. If you feel that time got away from you and you are now unable to conceive, then consider adopting if another child is what you want. But don’t put it out there.

As for taking care of aging parents, you and the whole world know that it will never be put on your son. You can afford to take care of yourself and your husband and a whole town of aging parents. You and all your “friends” are set for life.

Sal on

Spoiled brat!

Guest on

I wish some of you mothers could realize how incredibly stupid you sound sometimes. I know many of you believe it is a competition of who is the better mom (which is clear in every People article about babies), but it’s really not up to you to judge someones parenting off an interview of less than 10 sentences. Get a life and worry about your on families.

lol on

why would he care if she was pregnant??

Anna on

Guest, if you have a problem with the right of readers to comment on articles, then please take it up with People Magazine. Obviously you are here commenting too, and you obviously have lots of time to read all comments based on what you yourself said, so if that is the way you feel, then maybe YOU should get a life and worry about your “on” family lol. Stop judging other posters, they have every right to post their opinions on celebs who put themselves and their lives out there for public consumption. If you think it’s wrong to post opinions (except for your “on” perhaps), take it up with the magazine’s website but leave the rest of us alone.

KrisAnn on

Why do they all have diffent last names? Obviously I know she probably uses her Kudrow as her stage name but her husband is Stern and her son (with her husband) is Murray? I think it’s getting more rare to have a whole family with the same last name.

Camille on

Wow people are judgmental. So the kid doesn’t want siblings–so what? There are times that I wish I didn’t have any either. There are many families where the kids would have been better off had the parents had the sense to stop at one!

Guest on

Anna, please forgive me for not pressing the w on the keyboard hard enough. It seems to have really upset you

Snow on

I didn’t read most of the responses, but my personal advice is to never actually listen to your child when they say this. Mine told me this since he was little too. Unfortunately I was not able to have more kids, his father passed away prematurely, and I worry. ALOT. We don’t have a large family to support him when I’m gone. My siblings have no children (and prospects are not looking good). Yes, hopefully he’ll get married and have lots of kids. But what if he doesn’t? What if he gets divorced. I say do it despite what they tell you. Unless of course you don’t want to, and it really depends on the situation (i.e. the closeness & size of your extended family).

Cara on

I doubt they literally let their son dictate that, but are merely relaying antidotes in humor.

leslye on

My son is an only child and we couldn’t have another. I always felt bad about the fact that he had no brothers or sisters and asked him one day about that. He told me don’t feel like I am missing anything I have friends who have lots of brothers and sisters and I get to have that feeling of siblings but then I get to go home and I am the only one. He knows that the responsibility will be on him as I age but he is more than willing to accept that and wants to be able to help with my needs as I age. It all depends on the child really and how you raise him. Only children are not lonely they make lots of friends and socialize very early and very well.

dmills on

how does this Bethenny chick have a talk show?? Give me a break!!
Bonnie Hunt only gets a show for 2 seasons, and this reality chick becomes famous and gets more than one tv show. where is the talent!??

Kerri on

My son is a 3rd generation only child on my side of the family. We initially wanted more, but he was a fussy baby. One day, I had that perfect day with him and realized I liked the dynamic of our family as it is and I abandoned the conception treatments I had started. (I’d been told as a teen I was barren… he was a BIG surprise.)

As a 6-year-old, he spent time with a family friend while I was at the hospital with my mother having surgery. They had a 2-year-old who did her best to get his attention by doing all the things 2-year-olds do… and while he reportedly was patient with her, he decided then and there he wanted no siblings. That decision had long before been made by his dad and me, so it was good that he was on board.

I was the lonely only who requested a sibling at every gift-giving occasion, but my son, not so much.

Being an only is hard enough without people constantly assuming we are spoiled and always get our way. I’m sure if Lisa and her husband really wanted to add to their family, they would… with, hopefully, a healthy dose of counseling for their first-born.

Ann on

My gosh, people, she was telling a story about her kid. Why is this turned into spoiled kids, etc? Do you think she really let her kid decide how many she had? Stop reading things that aren’t in there. It does not make her child look spoiled. My eldest used to cry when I was pregnant with my third because he did not want another brother…I never took it as him being spoiled or anything negative.

lovely123 on

I have four sisters, three of us have more than three kids each. The middle one decided not to have any and never regrets a day of not having kids. She and her husband are very happy, and as sisters we always go to her place since we can enjoy time alone without kids. Nothing wrong with none or having just one. You get what you get and move on.

lovely123 on

By the way, I LOVE the name Julian!

Tara on

@KrisAnn–I believe Murray is her son’s middle name. So he’s Julian Murray Stern. :)

kasia on

i also never wanted siblings and not wanting them doesn’t make kid spoilded. still my parents forced sicter on my head and from time to time expected me to look after her and love her. never happened.

Kay on

I love how everyone insists that they weren’t spoiled as only children and their only child isn’t spoiled…so in other words, spoiled children are only existing in multi-children families??

Amanda on

Jeez this kid doesn’t sound too controlling. I hope they chose not to have more babies based on his desires. If so in another couple years this kid will be in a lot of trouble when he gets out into the real world and sees he has no control of anyone.

Cathleen on

I have seven siblings, and growing up I LOVED having siblings, and I still do. However, I understand that if her son is 14 and has lived his entire life without siblings how he might not be keen on getting any siblings now. Just because someone is an only child does not make him or her spoiled.

Jen on

If they would have had another baby when he was only 2 or 3 he wouldn’t have known a difference, he’s 14 now, I don’t blame him. I have an older sister who is 3 yrs older, she hated me from the start and has been rude to me my entire life, has always made me very sad I don’t have a nice sister.

Jen on

Kids don’t always have to take care of their parents when they are old, especially if they die quickly like mine did. I think it’s weird when parents say their kid has to take care of them in old age. I would never put that burden on my childdren that’s mean. I’d rather go into a nursing home than feel I am a burden to my kids, no way would I want that, not their responsibility, they have a life to live and I want them to live it!

iamnotheretoimpressyou on

Selfish kid. As if he gonna look after his parents when they are aged. Shocking too that his parents obey this insane kid. Sine when kids decide for their parents especially when it comes to having more kids??? weird family :(

Jones on

Being an only child is the best!!!! I would never have it any other way.

Sarah on

This isn’t some kind of stereotype. Often children with no siblings have problems sharing, want to be the centered of attention. Yes there are exceptions to the rule. Most of the time I can tell right away if someone was an only child. It isn’t difficult to notice the differences. When you have siblings you learn early on, roles, sharing, supporting, even arguing, compromising, that you don’t get from being an only child…

feeg on

I don’t think it’s necessary to have more kids. I have 10yrs older brother, he moved out when I was 15, I left my town because of studies and growing up was like being an only child. I have some childhood memories, he taught me some things…but you know he has his family and that’s his priority.I always wanted an older sister, and now I think it’s absolutely normal not wanting any siblings. Maybe Lisa and her husband adopt child when they get older and he move out. I don’t think their son is the reason of not having kids.

Rae on

In the scheme of things, this is truly innocuous. Her son didn’t say anything disturbing that Lisa Kudrow needs to address with a therapist. I’m one of six, and had to share everything. I had a friend, who was an only child, and she had to share nothing. She said she enjoyed that aspect of being an only child, and I understood it.

Betty on

I am an only child and love it. My parents are my world and they gave me the world. I am forever grateful and thankful for my parents. They could not have more kids and that was fine with me. I turned out great. At the age of 45 I have the life most can only dream about. There is nothing bad about being an only child. I applaud Lisa for her statement and I see nothing wrong with her child sharing his thoughts about not wanting siblings. After all she and her husband could have had another child if they had wanted one.

Saffron on

@Mina The only one in your house that would get to be an only child is your eldest sibling so quit complaining that you have to share with other people (which by the way is GOOD for you to learn because everyone has to share this planet with everyone else). Just be glad your parents had more than one child otherwise you wouldn’t be here to complain about having siblings. (BTW – I think your siblings are right, your parents have spoiled you to the point that pigs wouldn’t eat you if you were slops.)

Rose on

Well, since she’s 48 it’s a moot point.

Beth on

Hate to say this, but I never was close with my sister. I would have been fine as an only child. Matter of fact, we are now so divergent in our lifestyles, it was almost like we were never raised together. We are so different. Growing up we fought a lot. I never wished I had a different sibling, I just sometimes wished I didn’t have any sibling. I know that sounds awful, but it’s truthful and I know I’m not the only one out there who feels that way.

My daughter is an only child right now (she is only 3 though). I am really not positive that I am going to have any more children. Sometimes I feel guilty about it, because she is a very social little girl, and I don’t want her to be lonely. But I remember my experience, and I’m afraid it would be the same for her. Also, I think just having another child just to have a “playmate” for the first is absolutely wrong!

AC on

Smart kid. Siblings are nothing but a pain, especially when your parents are elderly and need care. There is always one who does all the work and provide all the care and then the other who just want to know when they can expect their inheritance check. I wish my parents had stopped at one.

Pam on

As a Mom of one child who will probably be an only, I feel I must say to everyone that sometimes people are lucky enough to have only one child and they cannot have any more. If she had wanted another, it is not likely that she would say that on national TV, but rather she would say she only wanted one.

Infertility is the most difficult thing for a normal person to deal with so people should really be careful with their comments if they don’t know the story behind everything. She is probably far removed from the time when she was trying to have a second so it is easier to say these comments about having one and be so non chalant about it.

Janie757 on

Who exactly runs this household – sounds like the kid has the final say.

Katie on

Wow! That’s crazy. I want more someday only have one and my son is 5 and keeps egging for me to having another and he really wants a little sister he keeps saying for the past few months. Being a single mom you can’t just make that happen lol. But as long as Lisa and her husband are happy that’s all that matters. I can’t imagine being 48 and having another though. I’m 30 and only have one and refuse after 35 lol. I’m tired as it is and finishing my Master’s Degree, get no help from the other party, and am working full-time.. and he starts Kindergarten this fall we have a lot of things we’re doing :)

Joyce on

Okay everyone…..Lisa is a comedian!!! If you watched the video interview it is obvious to anyone watching, she was speaking light-heartdly. Don’t always look for the worst in celebrity comments on here, because as parents we all have witty children who make us laugh and we go to work repeating the outrageous things they have said. My girls comments haven’t affected my adult decisions…. Oh my!

MollyBee on

Ummm…Why does Kudrow’s kid look like Schwimmer?

Jenn on

Most parents of only children are already prepared to have the child be respectful, share and socialize properly.

lyn on

I doubt she made the decision to have one based on her son’s opinion. My only child keeps asking for a sibling and I am certainly not having another one just because he wants one.

Shannon on

I guess he got his wish.

teresa on

Since when do parents let children make life decisions. Why would he be even involved in their choice. This is absurd

RG on

Good Grief some of you people need to take a chill pill. Judgemental much????? My daughter, who is 22, tells me she has always loved being an only child. Sure we tried to have another child, but it just wasn’t in the cards. So just breathe and let others live their lives as they wish!!!!

AP on

Wow, did this article bring out the comments! (And a lot of haters as well!)

As so many people have pointed out, she never once said that she and her husband put off more children because that’s how her son wanted it; just that being an only was his preference.

I have one brother less than two years younger than me. We fought like cats and dogs growing up and had I been asked what I thought back then I would have gladly wished he was never born. Of course, with time and maturity, we outgrew that behavior and now get along, but I still wouldn’t say we’re close. If he ever needed anything that it was in my power to give him I’d do it, but honestly don’t think I can say the same about him. So, even with a sibling, I always wished I had had a sister to be close to or an older brother to look up to. Having siblings doesn’t automatically guarantee close-knit, bonded harmony.

My daughter is an only. We tried to give her a sibling for a while but it never happened. When she was young she always wanted a brother or a sister and said she hated being an only, but now that she’s 18 she’s happy to be the only, probably because she realizes that at this expensive point in child-rearing (computers, cell phones, cars, college, etc.) she wouldn’t have the opportunities and things she has were there other children to have to provide for.

I also think that her above average vocabulary, reading and comprehension skills are as advanced as they are because she basically spent so much time with myself and other adults and had direct, one-on-one interaction. I read a couple of other comments that this has been proven…don’t have any facts or statistics myself, that’s just my opinion, but she has always excelled at certain things and I have to think her having all my attention to herself had a part in it.

I just know that I personally know of MANY families where the subsequent children don’t even speak or walk for a delayed period because the oldest/older siblings speak for them or carry them around.

And, back to Lisa Kudrow’s son, as far as people saying he’s obviously a spoiled brat, I ask them how they know this.

I actually volunteer at an animal rescue where her family recently came in to adopt a dog that they had seen online. (She is a great animal advocate who always rescues, so thank you Lisa!) Not only was Julian quite content to be adopting an unfortunate dog from a rescue rather than asking for a designer dog from a pet store, but he wanted the poor little Maltese mix that had cataracts and was obviously far from perfect.

To me, that shows that she has raised a compassionate and loving boy with a good heart, rather than a spoiled and selfish brat who could have demanded one of the cute little puppies or a more perfect, healthy and “manly” dog.

Haters will find a reason to hate anyways, but there isn’t anything in this article that indicates her son is an obnoxious or spoiled brat in any way.

lw on

I think people are reading WAY too much into the article. Where does she say that she allowed her son to decide whether or not she and her husband should have another child? She simply said that he was never into the idea of siblings. Does everyone need to be?

I have a younger sibling and we’ve always been close. We may fight (we are sisters, after all) but never intensely enough to cause a rift. We’ve also always been close to our parents. I know that I am very lucky in that regard. I’ve dealt with clinical depression issues in the past and having a great family is what kept me going during those dark periods. That having been said, I’m sure that people without siblings can have rich familial experiences as well. Every family unit is different – that should be celebrated.

Mom Of Twins on

What wrong with him not wanting siblings? I never wanted a sister, and don’t have any. I have 4 wonderful brothers and my parents. I couldn’t have asked for more.

bh on

If he’s saying he wants lots of kids, that means he isn’t happy being an only child.

Holly on

I was an only child and it would have been really good if I would have had another sibling, I had best friends but when you get older, your family is there for you, your frineds aren’t always there. I now have twin boys and am glad they will have each other and I also am hoping they will marry into a big family since ours is small.

Macie on

I have one child and she is happy, but not spoiled. At a young age she said she didn’t want siblings. She saw many times how brothers and sisters sometimes don’t get along and it bothered her. I always explained that it is okay and they are working out their differences, but it wasn’t something to get upset about. My husband is in the military and he is gone a lot. We decided it wasn’t meant to be that we have another child. It was hard enough on our only child and we didn’t want to put another child through it. I have three brothers and growing up I was always teased and picked on. So, having siblings can be fun, but also a trial as well. I am not ruling out having another child, but it would be a huge age gap. Everyone tells me not too. So, I am just letting God make that decision for me.

Sue on

Here’s another side. We had one for 6 years, listened to pressure he must have a sibling surprise twins. Not easy for many reasons.

Mom on

She never said that she was letting her son make the decision. She simply told a story about her son not wanting siblings. That doesn’t make him spoiled. He is allowed to have his own opinions. It does make alot of you very judgemental though.

ShaniaP on

I think this is taken totally out of context. I believe it was a light hearted comment made by Lisa Kudrow, who happens to be a funny lady, and by no means a declaration that her son dictates the family planning. He might just be very well-adjusted. There is no 1 definition of an only child. My nephew is an adult only child, by NO means spoiled or selfish but he was lonely growing up. I am extremely proud of him as he now serves in the United States Army.

Kathy on

I’m an only child and I wouldn’t have it any other way… In regard to taking care of my parents – after watching what some of my friends are going through with their siblings and a decision being an only child is much easier I’m the only one who needs to make a decision no arguing.

iantoad on

I highly doubt he is the reason they didn’t have more children. Chill out people.

Sunny on

Some children are just meant to be only child. He already knew what he wanted and he got it. I am only child myself and it have a lot of adventages and more. Someday I hope to have a big family myself even I am 32 years old.

Pita J. on

Circumstances worked out that I was only able to have one child and he is far from spoiled. It’s ludicrous to assume any child without siblings is given whatever he/she wants. I have friends who have 3-4 children and overindulge as a means of avoiding conflict. Why do people on this sight analyze every posted comment to death? Everyone’s manner of expression is different. If I was a celebrity, I’d avoid becoming a subject on this blog at all costs!

Sunny on

I am only child myself and NOT Spoiled at all! I took care of my parents when they are getting older and I am 32 years old. Yes, its a lot of responsbility in taking care of your parents but it really worth it. Yes, it’s great to be only child and it has great advantages and more. I want to have a big family myself.

Jennifer on

I have a cousin who is in his early 20’s, and is an only child. He is one of the most well-rounded and non-spoiled human beings I have ever met, and at times he acts way more mature than his parents (which is saying a lot). He gets asked constantly if he cares about the fact that he is the only one, and he has said that he actually prefers being an only child. He never stated why he does, but I think one of the reasons is because he knows others who have siblings and knows that siblings don’t always get along. So if he doesn’t have siblings, there’s less people to argue with. He may not always like the undivided attention he gets from his parents at times, but he says that he wouldn’t want it any other way.

I highly doubt that Lisa Kudrow’s child is spoiled just because he is the only one. Maybe she tried to have another after her son but it just didn’t happen. I know for my Aunt, she tried for almost 10 years to get pregnant, and when she finally gave birth to her son, she said that that’s enough for her because she knew how hard it was for her to have a pregnancy stick.

Amy on

And he would have received a sweet little, ‘that’s nice, dear’ as the husband and I procreated away (if that’s what we wanted to do)…

Kris on

We use comments like this or joke ‘this one is enough to handle’ to cover the pain of infertility following our 1st child. I’m happy for them if they are truly happy. There are lots of kids who have siblings who are spoiled too. Don’t be so quick to judge people!

Anonymous on

I am not an only child, but I am a daughter of one and I have a good friend that is one as well. My mother and my friend were NOT spoiled. My mother’s parents died long ago and I did not know either one of them maybe if I did I would have seen my mother having to deal w/ caring for them. My friend that is an only child of divorced parents. Her mother remarried but her father did not. I feel bad for her in the father sence because he comes from a family history of dimenca and if G-d for bid something happens to him she will have to make a decision recarding his care and I honestly do not think that she can do that. Although her mother has told her that if something happens to him she will help her make a decision on what to do.

ellie on

when a friend was pg, her 3 yo would say “No Grilles” only boys.

cowpatty on

It’s a sad, sad day when you give control of the size of your family to a child. I can’t fathom a responsible parent doing that, actually. Kids change their minds constantly, one day they love tomato soup, the next day they hate it. They also adjust and adapt to whatever’s presented to them. My 10-yr. old daughter cried buckets when we announced there would be a new baby in the family. By the time he was born, she would barely let anybody else hold him, lol.

Rachel on

My only child actually WANTED a sibling, but since I was older and since it was decided I needed a hysterectomy, We stuck with the one. He is the kindest, most generous child you could ever want, plus he’s an Aspie, which makes me sort of glad we didn’t have more, because he has taken up all our time and resources, working to get him into the right school, finding him OT, PT, etc.

I spoil him to pieces. I’m not at all ashamed of it. He gets tons of hugs and kisses and love, and his Aspie self loves this sort of positive attention.

Lucre on

Lisa, you shouldn’t feel guilty, there are your decisions, your OWN decisions! And please, leave her alone! Lisa I LOVE YOU♥

Lila on

“This isn’t some kind of stereotype. Often children with no siblings have problems sharing, want to be the centered of attention. Yes there are exceptions to the rule. Most of the time I can tell right away if someone was an only child. It isn’t difficult to notice the differences.…”

Actually, that IS a stereotype. Studies have proven it not to be true. Studies also show that only children are happier and do better in life (as a whole). I am guessing the moment you discover someone is any only child you start making assumptions because that is how you feel about them. I bet all the moeny in my bank account you couldn’t pick onlies out after spending the whole day with them. What a dumb-@ss thing to say!

I do think children with siblings are more prone to be bratty because they constantly have to share. I’ve noticed that with multiples, as soon as one picks something, the other one automatically wants it. And then the mom has to choose. There is usually crying involve. My daughter doesn’t mind sharing. She shares with her friends, at school, at activities. I have never once seen her have an issue (since her toddler years) or had a complant from a teacher, etc.

And for the 800th time- she never said he chose their family size. She only said he was glad he didn’t have siblings.

Nicole on

Some of you people really need to stop judging and stating incorrect stereotypes. My son is an only child and he does not want siblings either. It just so happens that my husband and I do not want anymore children either. But if we did, we would. We have gotten many compliments from his teachers on how polite he is. I made sure that at the age of 2, he started going to preschool so that he could socialize and learn to be around other children. he went three days a week for 3 hours a day. Onlies are not all spoiled rotten. I have one brother and we hardly speak, only at family functions. And like Lila said for the 801st time-she never said her son dictated how many children she was going to have!

Rena on

“If he’s saying he wants lots of kids, that means he isn’t happy being an only child.”

What does him not wanting siblings have to do with him wanting kids? In that case, if people with sibings only want one child, does that mean that they aren’t happy having siblings? Lisa Kudrow has siblings, but has only one child. Heather Locklear has siblings, but just one child. My parents have siblings, but they only wanted one child. My best friend has siblings, but she only wants one chid.

Selena on

I would trade my siblings for a different family that wants and has a singleton. LOL (but seriously) :(

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