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Hilary Duff: Motherhood’s ‘Biggest Shock’ Is No Sleep

04/24/2012 at 03:00 PM ET
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After the arrival of son Luca Cruz, first-time mom Hilary Duff thought she could do it all.

That is, until the actress received the “biggest shock” of life with a newborn: the lack of sleep!

“The first week I was like, ‘I’m doing this, I’m good. I can not sleep, I can do this.’ I don’t know where you get that energy from,” Duff, 24, tells PEOPLE. “Then it hits you — the fatigue.”

Fortunately, it didn’t take long for Duff to adhere to the number one parenting advice she received throughout her entire pregnancy.

“So many people were like, ‘Take naps when your baby naps,'” she recalls. “So I tried and it really helped a lot. I thought when he was napping that was the time I could do all the things I needed to do. It’s a fine balance.”

But two weeks later the late-night feedings turned a corner and Luca has been nothing short of a star sleeper, the proud mama raves.

“He’s really a good baby, I promise. He sleeps really well and he’s on a good schedule,” says Duff. “He sleeps a good five and six hours a night, which is just amazing. I am so grateful.”

Despite the stroke of luck when it comes to her easy-going son — Duff admits she was a “terror” of a baby — the new mom is still hoping that Luca doesn’t prove to be too good to be true.

“I’m waiting for the tables to turn. I’m like, ‘How do I have this wonderful baby?'” she says with a laugh. “[My mom] said when I came, she was like, ‘Where can I send you back?’ It was nothing like with [my older sister] Haylie.”

With each day bringing small milestones for the 5-week-old, Luca’s latest accomplishment is his sweet smile, according to Duff. New dad Mike Comrie, however, isn’t quite convinced.

“He’s staring at your mouth when you talk to him [and] he laughs a little bit,” she says. “My husband keeps telling me it’s gas and I’m like, ‘No, he loves us so much, he’s already smiling.'”

All the emotions of becoming a mother has prompted Duff to partner with Johnson’s Baby Cares for their Save the Children campaign, which reaches out to families in need during natural disasters.

“It’s a crazy statistic to learn that 90 percent of American children are living in a high risk area for natural disasters. I can’t imagine what it would feel like being in the thick of that,” she admits.

“Really wanting to get involved,” part of Duff’s contribution to the campaign has been helping in the assembly of the 5,000 Johnson’s Baby Care Kits. “It can help so many people just to have these kits ready to be sent out in times of crisis and need,” she says, adding that she uses the line of products on her own son.

“I grew up with [Johnson's Baby] so it has memories tied to it. It’s nice to keep the legacy going.”

Having once been told she could never grasp the sudden surge of a parent’s heart until she was one herself, Duff shares that it has all come full circle — and she’s got the unconditional love to prove it.

“You don’t realize it, you can’t understand it until it happens,” she notes. “You’re holding your baby and looking at him and your husband and thinking, ‘I would do anything for you.'”

– Anya Leon with reporting by Julie Jordan

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Showing 80 comments

Shannon on

Shock? Lack of sleep is one of the first things people tell you to prepare for. l:)

blessedwithboys on

Hilary, I hope you’re co-sleeping at night to make up for all the time you’re away at the gym.

Tee on

No matter how many times you’ve been warned, lack of sleep can still be shocking! I’m glad to hear that Luca is doing well otherwise! Hilary, you sound like you are really soaking up every moment of motherhood. I’m so happy for you!

Blessedwithboys, I have been reading your comments for awhile now and I just don’t know what to make of you. Do you set out to be so nasty? Do you act this way on purpose? Do you not realize how you come across? Seriously, what makes you act so ugly?

Maggie on

Blessed, your schtick is SO OLD. Her being gone for an hour for a Pilates or spin class is completely fine. Guess what? I’m an attachment parent, breastfed for two years, coslept and homeschool my son. But when he was an infant and had terrible colic, my favorite time of day was when my husband would get home from work or my mom would come over and I would go for a run and get far, far away from the screaming. Your judgment of other moms is extremely sad.

Jen on

Sleep Deprivation Syndrome is awful. It will make you wackadoo. Please have someone watch the baby so that you can sleep. They don’t stay babies long enough.

Josy on

It was a shock to me! I would cry at night just from missing sleep lol thankfully my baby was also like baby Luca and quickly learned to sleep at night but I have extreme respect with parents that have kids with colic.

SupportEachother on

She sounds like she’s doing a wonderful job and adjusting at her own pace.

Blessedwithboys, I have to say, you are quite judgemental of others and really truly negative every single time I see your name on one of these posts.

Why do mothers insist on bashing other mothers? It makes me sick that we can’t be supportive and positive, no matter what parenting choice. The woman went to the gym to breathe and get away for a bit. I’m sure your “boys” were always perfect angels and you never wanted one minute of peace. Stop being a martyr because no mother believes you. Why don’t you try being nice for a change?

See, if I was all negative like you, I would say you may be blessed with those boys, but they may not be blessed with you if you walk around being horrible. Lord help your sons when they choose partners one day. Wise up lady.

lyndzi on

The most brilliant headline ever! Is Hilary really this dumb? Join the parent club!

Jenny on

I wasn’t prepared for the level of exhaustion I felt with my first child. I knew I’d be tired…but I was EXHAUSTED. I would get anxiety as the night came knowing I’d be up for most of it with a crying baby. I can relate.

RKF on

@Blessedwithboys – Shouldn’t you be on an “I hate life” forum? You’re entitled to your opinions, of course, but what is the purpose of consistently spewing negativity? Are you bored and need attention?

As for some other comments, what is wrong with some of you? I don’t think she’s “dumb” because she didn’t realize how tiring motherhood would be. People likely don’t realize the extent of the tiredness until actually experiencing it.

Hilary seems like a sweet and loving Mom.

mary on

You would have thought I was a pro after all I was having a 4th child and was well into my 30’s. Let me tell you, lack of sleep was horrible. Every child is different, every pregnancy is different. So what comforted one child did NOT work for the other(s). You can be told ‘you will be tired’ but until you are there is just no understanding.

There is nothing wrong with going out doing gym, pilates or jogging I had to learn to let go of my ‘type A’ personality and let the grandparents and husband parent and grandparent their way, (after all the grandparents raised 5 and 6 kids respectively and they all survived and grew up wonderful people) that was all possible so I could go running, shopping, clean or catch a nap which was crucial in order for me to be a productive parent and wife.

The judging of other mothers is something horrible. I do NOT want my children judging other children I want and encourage them to be supportive and respectful of others and when adults act in a certain manner you are in essence teaching your children to behave in such a manner. Is that really what you want for your children? After all you can still have an opinion, but there are better ways to opinionate.

Steph on

The exhaustion and lack of sleep is shocking to many first time parents! I thought it would be no problem and I could easily get through it- I’d never felt exhaustion like that before and the feeling was exactly that….SHOCKING! Good on her for taking the time to exercise….it’ll make her a better mother if she is taking care of herself in some way.

anon1 on

sometimes it is best for your newborns if you do take time away (just an hour or so) for yourself to maintain your health. mothers need to care for their children first, and sometimes that means taking one hour a day to work out or take a break from the baby to keep them sane. if she was going out all day every day then i would question her parenting. but seriously, working out one hour or two doesn’t mean the baby isn’t bonding with haylie.

Lisa on

LOL, the title of this article cracks me up (the way its worded)… ahh paging captain obvious! But I totally agree with her. It is shocking and nothing anyone can ever prepare for. Those first few months are brutal. Although beautiful at the same time.

Jillian on

I get what she means about not understanding the sleep. It isn’t like she didn’t think it would be hard….she just didn’t understand the extent of it. Kinda like when you take too much food because your eyes are hungrier than your eyes or you eat more than you intend to and you are super full because you misjudged how hungry you were. People are too deep and over analyze.

NJ

Liv on

I am a first time mother to a now 4 month old and the sleep deprivation has been by far the hardest thing for me to cope with. Everyone tells you to prepare for it and I thought I was ready, but how can you be when you’ve never experienced anything like it before?

Mya on

Co-Sleeping definitely helps with the sleep issue but I can’t fault her for getting some time away! When I had my first I never expected it to be so exhausting or time consuming.

Getting away – even an hour a week was so important for me.

He’s now 2 and I don’t leave him anywhere but I have my days I wish I still could!

torgster on

Gals, why do we even waste our energy responding to posts by Blessed, the smother mother? She’s clearly delusional and I feel sorry for her kids. Perfect candidates for bullying as they will never learn independence or be allowed to think for themselves.

Jenny on

Liv, AMEN!! So true! I have a 4 month old as well and it really is something that you cannot prepare yourself for no matter how much you try! You certainly expect it – but the reality is SO DIFFERENT!! And I think mothers definately need to take a little bit of time for themselves or else we’d all go insane!

Hilary sounds like she has settled nicely into motherhood! It definately is challenging and hard work, but so rewarding at the same time! We should all be encouraging each other! :)

Kate on

blessedwithboys, just curious to know what you’re doing to make up the time you spend away from your kids while you’re busying acting like an idiot on message boards?

Sarah J on

All I know is that you can tell expecting parents again and again about lack of sleep and how hard it’s going to be, but you really just don’t get it until the baby comes. There is no way to “be prepared” mentally and physically for your first baby. I have never been that tired before in my life, but those weeks are short and soon forgotten :). She seems like a great mom.

Shannon on

Time to hire a nanny honey.

Holiday on

Hillary is so right, the lack of sleep is just so hard and you cannot prepare for it. My kids were both awful sleepers. My son was 3 before he slept through the night and my daughter at 23 months never has either.

Anonymous on

Shannon- She’s stated before that her husband and mom help with the baby and watch him when she goes to excercise and stuff, so I don’t think she needs a nanny. :)

Anyway, normally I like what Hilary has to say, but I don’t like her comment about Luca “being on a good schedule”. A baby Luca’s age shouldn’t be on a schedule! When they’re that young they need to be fed on demand! But that being said, Hilary sounds like she’s loving motherhood despite the sleep issue!

Marky on

Blessedwithboys just doesn’t get the point that many people don’t agree with co-sleeping, or nursing your child when they get home from “kindy”, or enveloping yourself so much in your children that they don’t learn to stand on their own two feet, ever.

In the meantime, her two boys are learning to bully from their mother, in-between nursing sessions, since that’s what she does on this board. blessed may mean well (who knows?), but she is hateful, overbearing, judgmental, and so pushy it is beyond rude. The old saying is: “The road to hell is paved with good intentions”, so if she does have good intentions, they are lost in her rhetoric.

Moms need “taking care of”, too, in order to best meet the needs of their child. As a parent of 5, and a foster parent of 45, I had to learn that a few hours a week just kicking back, having lunch with a friend, or sitting on the deck reading, gave me an extra burst of energy that helped me be the mom who ran, played, laughed and listened to my children–all 50 of them.

Hilary sounds as if she’s doing a great job, and having your child be so “attached” to you they have no ability to be with anyone else is not doing them a favor. She’s a lovely young mother who is doing the best job she can to meet the needs of her child. No one needs to criticize her for that…..

Jillian on

Anonymous, How many children do you have? I am pretty sure, you don’t have any.

Having schedules with children is the best for them. Starting at this young age is the best time. Having had many children myself, I can attest to that, as can everyone I know and my doctor. My friends who had no schedule from the beginning paid for it and their children suffered.

Good job Hilary at having your baby on a schedule, which benefits him!!

NJ

Rebecca Jayne on

The lack of sleep was a shock to me too! Yes, a SHOCK! You know you have to get up and feed them, but what that entails exactly and how long it takes to get them back to sleep was unexpected (or that they don’t go back to sleep at all sometimes!). She sounds like a very nice young mother. I wish her all the best!

And good for her for taking that tiny amount of time for herself. Seriously, she’s taking care of that baby around the clock (that’s 168 hours a week), so if she spends 4 or 5 hours doing something for herself I congratulate her. The few times I had help I’d leave and go park my car at the park and sleep! Lol! I wish I could have had the discipline to go to the gym!

MiB on

Anonymous, most babies develope their own schedule once their internal clock has adjusted to the day and night cycle, so Hilary saying that Luca is on a good schedule doesn’t mean that he is on a schedule someone else than him has decided. Most of the babies I have known have slipped into some sort of schedule or routine after a couple of weeks, where they have tended to sleep at certain times of the day and get hungry at other times. That is perfectly normal (even with babies that nurse on demand) and doesn’t mean that they have been forced into that pattern.

If you think about it, you probably start getting tired at the same time of night, hugry at the same times of day, you might be an early bird or a night owl. Babies are the sme, their pattern just changes a lot more often as they go through growths spurts and developemental stages. Even exclusively breastfed-on-demand babies can slip into a routine/schedule after just mere days, the routine will probably change in a couple of weeks, after every growth spurt, at every developemental stage, after every sickness, but most babies do nonehteless have a routine of sorts.

GGMT on

I like how she discusses this stuff, from what she’s been saying she sounds like a down-to-earth person. Being frank about the difficulties of becoming a parent for the first time is refreshing, seems like celebs always make it look so easy. It’s just crazy to hear her say “my husband,” because it seems like yesterday that I would watch her on Disney after school, or read headlines along the lines of “Hilary: All Grown Up?” Time flies, man oh man!!!

sara on

blessedwithboys. Are you out of your mind? Have you not been watching TV? Cosleeping in NOT recommended, EVER. Do you have any idea how many babies DIE from cosleeping? A mother was just convicted of child indangerment because her baby died from cosleeping and the father is about to go on trial also. There first child died from cosleeping. They were told of the dangers but did the same thing with their second child. This infant is now also dead. Blessedwithboys, God blessed your children by keeping them alive since you did not suffocate your babies in the middle of the night because you adhere to cosleeping. Babies need to sleep alone, in their crib, on their back.

Jenny on

@blessedwithboys what a ridiculous comment to make. She has already has people commenting on her weight and her baby is not even 2 months old yet, so she is going to the gym trying to get back to what she was and she has people like u judging. She can’t win!! She seems like a great mom, and any mom who doesn’t give themselves an hour here or there to do the things they enjoy need to loosen the reins. The child is with his grandmother when she’s at the gym, not a hobo she found on the street!!

Rebecca on

I agree with Maggie, No mother should feel judged for taking time for herself, you gotta take care of yourself if you expect to be able to take care of anyone else. Kudos to Hilary for taking that time!!

christa on

Every mother goes through this, you are not the only one.

Erin on

Please! This damn celebs with babies can get sleep whenever they want. I’m sure she has a live in nanny. Why do you think celebs keep popping out kids – they don’t have to raise them! No pity for Hilary Duff.

Sarah on

You absolutely do not realize just how tired you will be until you live it. And if you try to explain it to a pregnant woman with insomnia, they just don’t get it. I know I didn’t!

KD on

I think alot of parents have shock set in about many aspects of being a first time parent. She’s normal…amazing how many women who are parents spout negativity to other momther’s and not support them. We all have different choices over how we raise our children. I was lucky that my son slept well like Hilary’s and was on a schedule – I personally think a schedule is a good thing and yes it can change a little but the basic routine helps my son (who is 3) and I have a productive day and night. I suffered from lack of sleep and stress w/ having a preemie and a 6 week stay in the NICU.

As a parent I don’t think we ever truly get back to sleeping well…sure my son gets about 10 hrs of sleep at night but every now and then he still needs me or wants a drink so my sleep is sometimes disturbed…AND he’s up bright and chipper every day by 6am!!! I’m jealous of those mom’s who get time to hit the gym after baby..I think it’s both physically and mentally a much needed time apart. I know for me having ME time makes me a better mom, recharges me to pick up where I left off. I wish Hilary the best.

Melissa on

Even though people tell you that you will miss out on sleep you don’t realize how much until the baby actually arrives. So I think her comments are perfectly warranted.

As for the people making negative comments, Grow up! Everybody parents differently and I think most people will agree that giving the mom or dad a break for an hour or two a day is healthy. It helps the parents recharge and lets the baby get used to other people caring for it so that it is not a shock when the parents are away from them later on in life. They know that mom and dad are coming back and they will be ok without them for a few hours.

The judgmental people also are not “pefect” They show themselves to be less than perfect by bashing people. How wonderful is that?

amanda on

I love Hilary and she sounds like a great mom….reading this actually made me kind of sad…my daughter is 4 and I barely remember the exhaustion in the beginning. I guess that wasn’t the important stuff to remember.

Guest on

This is one thing people will warn you about with a newborn, but you can’t really grasp how exhausting it is until you actually have the baby and are actually doing it. I just had my 4th baby…and let me tell you…I just might die from sleep deprivation.

Keep it up! It all gets better around 12 weeks old.

sandy on

blessed with boys- guess your very jealous- because you sound SO bitter and angry OR maybe your title holds some other hidden anger that you need to acknowledge and deal with. obviously you have issues if so many people took the time to comment about you.

Brooke Lynn on

I have a 12 week old baby that wakes up every hr.. work full time, so no time to sleep. Even though it’s my 3rd child, no sleep is still a shock. Contrats Hilary, your doing a great job with the little one. Make time for yourself, you deserve it.

Audrey on

How refreshing!!! Someone who actually gives an honest account of what new motherhood is like. As wonderful as it is and this period is a short one’ it is the reality of newborn babies. I remember saying to my husband that I hope I wasn’t so exhausted that I didn’t enjoy that time and thankfully if I was…my children won’t remember. Love her honesty, clearly she is hands on and not letting a nanny do all the work!!!

Beth on

Really dear? That was a shock? Well get used to it….

justamom on

well all i can say is….you certainly are blessed with boys, but those poor boys arent blessed with a negative nasty and ignorant person like yourself. I have 5 kids and with every child i had from 22-37 years of age, something different happened that i didnt expect. With every child i could not wait to have an hour to myself to go to the gym. I worked from home with them, they were always with me so when daddy came home (i live 700 miles away from family), i was out that door like a shot with barely a peck on the lips for daddy. The great thing was, that hour or hour and a half (gasp), made daddy happy too because i was in a much better mood and very appreciative. Hilary Duff seems to be a darling mother with a normal life. You however might want to get some therapy.

Beth on

Blessed? Maybe he is having Daddy time. Must be nice to be a SAHM who has nothing better to do than judge another mom. You must be on BBC, those women are the nastiest. I see nothing wrong with her taking a few hours a week to get herself back in shape. I wish I could do the same.

LuckyLady on

@ERIN-sounds to me like you are nothing but a jealous bitter person. You have no idea what kind of lives any of these people live as well as the fact that just because they have enough money to have a nanny doesn’t mean they have one. I would love to have a nanny help me out and it wouldn’t mean that I would be a bad parent because of it. People that are judgmental are usually the ones who want what others have.

Sharon on

I know how she feels, but sleep deprivation is just a short amount of time when a baby is born, it gets better pretty fast; the infant stage goes so fast, just enjoy it while it last. Congrats to her and her husband.

Kel on

I can’t believe some of the people on here? Of course lack of sleep is a shock to your system no matter how much you’ve been warned – get a grip people. Also – I think it’s great she takes time to go the gym. A lot of women forget to take care of themselves and focus only on baby. You can’t neglect yourself or your health…doing so would not only have an adverse affect on you, but your baby as well. I think she seems like a terrific mom and I sincerely hope she does not co-sleep. Co-sleeping causes a lot of deaths and shouldn’t be used as bonding time just because a mom hits the gym. Some people on here are just stupid, ignorant, and pathetic (this is in response to the first 2 posters – shannon and blessedwithboys – you people are nuts!)

Sharon on

Hillary is just sharing her experience of being a Mom for the first time, it seems like some people just want to be so judgemental, we all should be happy for other Mother’s and be able to share their experinces without being judged.

nej on

My mom has a theory that the oldest child is the most easygoing. Nature’s trick to get you to have another :) I was the easygoing baby, and my younger brother was the exact opposite.

hbomb1225 on

Lol @kate that was hilarious. She probably sits her kids in front of a tv while she is in the other room blasting other peoples parenting, but ya know thats ok cuz shes going to breastfeed and sleep in the same bed with them til they are 18…and its ok for a tv to raise her kids because hey, at least shes ay home 24/7.

Kelly on

Sleep deprivation is definitely something you can’t prepare for, especially when the first few days when everything is new and exciting and you think “ok I can do this”. It really does just hit one day.

Momof2 on

Blessedwithboys…You are really hateful in all of your comments both here in this article as well as other articles about motherhood. So what if Hillary takes a minute for herself to go to the gym? If anything, that would help her be a better parent because it is keeping her healthy and boosts energy which she needs during this exhausting time. How can you have kids of your own and not understand the need to take a moment for yourself, not just for your own sake but for the good of your whole family. You always post the most negative, judgemental comments and most women can see right through your hatefulness and bitterness. Get a life or fix your own before you jump at the chance to attack an innocent woman, mother, person who you DO NOT KNOW.

swag on

The first thing you hear about IS the lack of sleep. I am sure Hil and her multi-millionaire hubby have some sort of help.

Kandy on

Hey Blessed – did you ever stop to think that maybe something’s not wrong with the entire world, there’s actually something wrong with you? If you smother (perfect word used by pp) your boys so much, my bet is they are going to college cross-country and get away from you the first chance they get

Kandy on

and p.s. I think she’s doing great and I like her. And, it was a shock for the rest of us as well. It’s one thing for people to tell you – it’s another thing to experience sleep deprivation. For example, I could tell someone how annoying blessedwithboys posts are, but you have to experience them to know just how annoying they are.

Beebop on

Everybody warned me about the lack of sleep when I was pregnant with my first child but this isn’t something you can prepare for because before your baby comes, you’re already tired so you try to sleep as much as you can but you’re so uncomfortable that you have a horrible sleep! The last three months of pregnancy and the first three months of a new baby are probably the worst six months you will ever spend in your life! Kudos to Hilary for not only NOT having a nanny, but for being an honest mom and for taking ‘me’ time when she needs it.

Megan on

For all of you who are coming down on her for going to the gym for an hour a day, the baby does have a father who just retired from hockey (which means he is not traveling and practicing) so why shouldn’t she go and let the two of them have time together. A mother and baby do not have to be attached 24/7. If she is nursing, his father can certainly give him a bottle of pumped milk. Yes, everyone tells you all about the sleep deprivation but you never think it is going to be as bad as it really is. People also say newborn babies sleep 18 hours a day so you think to yourself “that is a lot of sleep, surely, I won’t be as exhausted as everyone says”. Give the girl a break. She is a first time mom.

Amber on

Try breastfeeding…you get even more lack of sleep…bottle feeding gives you more sleep, but I still believe the breast is the best…I breast fed my son and plan on breastfeeding the next one we have…to the poster that said they cried sometimes, I know what you mean, I cried sometimes too.

emme on

I understand her, I found the first months of my son’s life like a rollercoaster ride..you have to keep going although you cannot keep up! The worst thing is when you give birth and you have to take care of your baby hours after..At least this is what happened to me, I had a c-section and 10 hours after the nurses brought the baby to me and told me to look after him while I was in so much pain…I admire all new mothers and since having my own son I wouldn’t dare to criticise any of them. There were times I also wanted to run away. You don’t feel good about yourself but what makes you feel worse is when people start judging you for being selfish and not putting enought time for your child. The good thing is that children grow up. My son is one year old now and I see the light in the tunnel!ha ha Thumbs up for all new moms out there!!

Amber on

Try breastfeeding…you get even more lack of sleep…bottle feeding gives you more sleep, but I still believe the breast is the best…I breast fed my son and plan on breastfeeding the next one we have…to the poster that said they cried sometimes, I know what you mean, I cried sometimes too..also its not my place to judge but I cant feel for any celebrity because they use nannies they have no idea what its like for people who dont have nannies and actually have to raise their kids.

guest on

blessedwithboys, you do realize co-sleeping is not a good thing.

tigerlily on

I must say, I read this article and actually felt as though I wrote it myself LOL.

My first child is now just 10 months old, and thankfully she, my husband and I have all made it through to this point with majority of our sanity! hahahaha – I always recalled people telling me to be prepared for the lack of sleep, or how in the end of your pregnancy, the reason you are up so many times in the night is so you can prepare for when baby comes.

WHAT A CROCK! My baby was up every 3 hours on the dime! I was totally not prepared or understood what the true meaning of exhaustion was until I had my baby. I breast fed so here we’d be, nursing for 25 minutes, changing, swaddling and cuddling just waiting for her to fall back asleep. Then I would be fighting to get back to sleep before she’d wake up again, cause the thoughts of her waking up would have my mind scrambling!!! By the time I actually did fall back asleep, she’d be waking for another feeding and change within a half hour. It was a vicious cycle!!

My husband went back to work a day after coming home from the hospital, as he was a brand new business owner and couldn’t afford to not be available. Knowing he had to work all day, I’d try as little as possible to disturb him during the night so he could be coherent the next day (Even with him being very willing to help.)

So at first I like Hilary thought, “I got this! I can do this, I’m tired but this is working out just fine.” Well, come four day’s later of round the clock sleep deprivation, I was practically the walking dead. I remember having a complete breakdown because my emotions were running so high.

Nothing can prepare you for what being a new mother brings. Everyone has their own experiences, but lack of sleep is one common denominator I would think we could all live without! Uggghh just the thought of those first few weeks. My sanity was almost gone :(

Holly on

Ok, anyone who has one baby and complains about how much work it is, is a totally wimp! I have twin baby boys, so I know that taking care of one is a total breeze!

LoopsFroot on

Why is this girl talking? Seriously? Why?

tigerlily on

@ Kandee — your second post just made me giggle out loud!! That was good :)

And Holly: You apparently have your head up Blessedwithboys’ rear end! I guess you two, out of this entire list of posts are correct and the rest of us just don’t know what we’re talking about.

You and Blessed should go get some coffee together and share your Miss Negative, know-it-all stories. Get a clue, you’re the minority here, not everybody else!

Anonymous on

During my first pregnancy, I already heard that lack of sleep would be one of the biggest “hurdles” and just like Hillary, I tried to prepare for it, but when the time came, it was still a shock, cause all you got was really at least two to three hours every night and even with co-sleeping, it wasn’t enough, though it helped.

Anyways, my husband and I got throught it, just like all the wonderful parents out there, and with our second child, it was easier, i don’t know if it was because my husband and I were already used to the late nights or because our second baby was an easy baby..anyways, to all the new mommies out there, embrace it because it’s the greatest experience in the world

pam on

yeah, you have to get up when the baby cries…

Mom of 2 on

@tigerlily: You rock!

MB on

blessedwithboys- Are you serious? Her being away for a little bit of “me” time is bad enough to receive a comment like that? It’s not like she’s out at the bar having some me time, she is out doing exercise, which is good for the mind and body. Maybe you should get some, I mean exercise btw.

Rachie on

Well said, Marky

Lauren on

Bette, Holly and Loopsfoot I feel bad for your children! You are so incredibly judgmental! It is overwhelming being a first time parent, even with one! No wonder the world is so horrible, it’s filled with people like you in it, who have no empathy for others!

Laila on

Seriously, I am sick of mothers judging other mothers harshly. One baby IS hard to handle when you’ve never done it before! I’m sure two at once is incredibly difficult, but DON’T tell me that being a mother of one isn’t hard as well. Motherhood is a shock and a change to one’s entire way of life, top to bottom. It’s amazing and wonderful, and also really really challenging. Let’s support one another, please!

Mimi on

Wow, jealous moms thinking she will just get a nanny and get some sleep. We have a nanny but I still didn’t get any sleep because she wasn’t a wet nurse! I was breastfeeding and even if I pumped a bottle I still wanted to hold and stare at my babies 24 hours a day, and I didn’t really want anyone else to even feed them. The nanny helps with other stuff like baby laundry or advice (which is so great), or she could stay at the house if you did want to run out for awhile while the baby is sleeping. Having that help was so wonderful and being judgmental or hateful that someone has it and you didn’t or don’t isn’t going to change your own circumstances.

Sam on

I had the same moment where I thought I had everything under control and was good to go. Three days later I called my mother crying, asking for her to come over and help. I got a precious two hours sleep and my Mum LOVED spending time with her new favourite man. After that, my mum came over every few days to look after my son so I could sleep and when he started sleeping better at night, I went to the gym or caught up with a friend. Things instantly seemed more achievable and I was so much more patient.

The lack of sleep is SUCH a shock! You think you have been tired before, but you have no idea. Struggling in silence does not make you a better mother or a hero.

And if you say you haven’t cried from exhaustion in the first 6 weeks, you are a robot. I remember waking up while my mum was looking after my son and finding she had done my dishes for me. I was a mess, haha!

Anonymous on

sara and guest- Co-sleeping CAN be dangerous, but that’s mostly when you don’t take the time to create a safe enviornment for it. Like crib sleeping, there are certain precautions that should be taken before allowing a baby to sleep in your bed (for example, no blankets or sheets near the baby, no siblings or pets in the bed, no putting the baby in your bed if you’ve had a few drinks or you’re taking medication that impairs your judgement and/or level of awareness while sleeping, etc.).

Also, you can buy co-sleeping cribs which attach to your bed. With those, the risks of death for the baby are pretty much the same as those for a baby sleeping in his/her own crib in his/her own room (provided you make the co-sleeping crib safe, of course!). :)

Anon on

Let’s not forget that Hilary has been living the Hollywood life since she was pretty young. She probably feels immense pressure to get back to her old shape. It doesn’t sound like she has any sort of night time nanny or help, so she’s doing it on her own, which is rare for Hollywood!

Just because her baby sleeps 5 or 6 hours doesn’t mean she’s getting enough rest either. My child slept that much at a stretch but woke up every day at 4am. That’s when the day started. By 3 in the afternoon I was ready for either bed or the looney bin. People don’t realize how hard it is.

Liza on

Co-sleeping is ridiculous- didn’t a mom just kill her second child by co-sleeping? I must be crazy bc I think co-sleeping is nuts, formula is awesome, and home schooling is for kooks.

Sierrna on

HELLO.. 34 yrs ago and 31 yrs ago my newborns did NOT even sleep 4 hrs a night until they were EIGHT WEEKS OLD! How lucky can she be.. He sleeps six hrs at 2 weeks! I actually hope she goes through what most of us did back in our day!

Hopelesspirate on

Careful, blessedwithboys, that savors strongly of bitterness and jealousy. Nothing wrong with Mama taking care of herself, too. A happy mum is a happy baby. And from the comments she’s made above, I don’t think little Luca needs to worry about neglect. :)

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