Elisabeth Röhm’s Blog: It Was Almost Perfect…

07/21/2011 at 09:00 AM ET
Courtesy Elisabeth Röhm

Elisabeth Röhm, best known for her role as Serena Southerlyn on Law & Order, has a busy year ahead of her.

The actress, 38, can be seen on the big screen in the upcoming films Chlorine, Transit, Abduction and Officer Down, and is found online on Facebook and @ElisabethRohm on Twitter.

In her latest blog, Röhm and fiancé Ron Anthony are excited for their first real date night after 3-year-old daughter Easton August schedules her first sleepover — but the evening doesn’t go as planned!

When did your kids have their first sleepover? What do you and your man do when you have a night alone?


It was almost perfect, PEOPLE.com readers. Not life as a whole — which is pretty darn good these days — but our date night! We had a whole plan for ourselves that was to surpass all other attempted dates. And we were psyched!

You see, in the last three years, our daughter has been with one or both of us every day and night, other than her schooling — as she should’ve been. In addition, we also don’t live near any relatives and we’ve made a decision that we would never leave her alone for an overnight with her nanny, Lupe.

It just never felt comfortable to us. Yes, we’ve gone out to dinner and have had plenty of time to bond when she’s been at school. Yet we’ve never been alone for a 24 hour period — no evenings at a hotel or even in our own house since she was born. Excessive you might say — or not. It was right for our clan.

Until the other night, when we decided that it was appropriate for Easton to have her first sleepover. It was to take place at her Aunt Cathy’s house, who is a dear friend and like a sister to me. Easton and Cathy have a bond of their very own and have often expressed a desire to have a sleepover. Saturday night was the night we all felt Easton was ready. Woo-hoo! Everyone was excited!

Although I was sort of anticipating a call at say, 9 p.m., with tears and confusion, I didn’t want to project it on the whole group, so I tried to keep my thoughts to myself. I decided to allow what seemed like a natural progression. So at 3:30 p.m., Ron and I dropped Easton at Aunt Cathy’s and rushed off — a little bit giddy — to have our first mini-vacation!

The weather was picturesque! We drove in the California sunshine and warmth to the even warmer destination of our Bikram yoga class. Of course, we get to share short activities together all the time but we, like you ladies, rush home afterward to relieve the sitter, sister or mother who has stepped in for a few hours. But that Saturday was our first sleepover — we were on our own!

After yoga, we actually got to go eat something that we were able to savor and not rush though. And after that, we had our dessert at a different establishment, then took a little walk and wondered what to do with this newfound freedom. Movie? Nah. At a loss, we wandered into a few stores and looked around. What to do? What to do?

Now, we had been checking in with Aunt Cathy and everything was going along swimmingly with the little one. They had gone to the park, the market, had an ice cream and were happily heading home to give Cathy’s treehouse a facelift! It is truly an incredible structure, this treehouse. Cathy dreaded the idea of ever taking it down and had decided to leave it up for Easton’s childhood.

That night they were going to anoint it officially as “Easton’s Treehouse.” Since her kids were mere weeks away from college, the treehouse obviously needed some major TLC. Cathy and Easton had a big project ahead of them, what with wanting to put up fairy lights, decorate with pillows, table and chairs etc. to give it that magical lived-in look. They were just too busy to talk to Mom and Dad!

It was then after that last call that my anticipation of Easton’s desire to come home fully melted from my ever-prepared mom shoulders and I truly felt relaxed. I knew that Ron and I had an evening ahead of us and that Easton was safe, sound and seriously thrilled to be having a big girl party with her Aunty! We wisely chose to go home and fully embrace our freedom.

It dawned on us as we walked into a clean, quiet (oh yeah, our dog Chloe was away for the sleepover too) house that was suddenly all ours that we have never had an evening alone in our house. What a novelty it was to be “home alone!” Wow, it was a slice of heaven … almost.

Until that darn phone rang! Perfectly timed to us lighting candles and getting in bed to get some, I kid you not … REST! We were so excited to sleep in our own bed through the night without the familiar pitter-patter. But instead, RING-A-DING-DING! There was the phone piercing our bubble with its shrill interruption.

“She’s not ready,” Cathy said. And trusting Cathy as I do I said, “I’m on my way.”

How quickly the night changed from almost perfect to the loving chaos of a family and its needs. We drove quickly, feeling badly that Easton’s fear of sleeping without us was keeping her up past her bedtime. When we got there they were peacefully watching The Berenstain Bears, but I could see that Easton was past her prime.

This was confirmed as we drove home to her tears of fatigue. I don’t know if it was the drama of the car ride or if Chloe ate some garbage at Cathy’s, but the stars aligned in that moment of chaos and our dog added to the shift in our evening by throwing up.

Oh, that was a fun car ride home! How did it go from candles and yoga to tears and vomit?! Hilarious, PEOPLE.com readers! It didn’t really seem so at the time, but now looking back I can say it was rather endearing. All but the doggie part!

After we got home and I had carried Easton to her bedroom and kissed her goodnight, she said, “Sing to me Mommy,” as she always does. She wasn’t ready yet for the big sleepover that night, but we both knew as she fell asleep in my arms that she had grown by leaps and bounds that day.

Last night we all had dinner and Easton said to Aunt Cathy, “I want to sleep at your house tonight.” We all chimed in that maybe we could try again over the weekend when there is no school or work. I was glad we’d ended on a high note and not forced the issue because they were both still excited by the idea.

As much as Ron and I had embraced our moment of freedom, we always want Easton to know that her feelings matter and that her opinion counts. She has the right to change her mind and come home. Hopefully she’ll always know that. Right moms? Even when they are all grown-up, we want our kids to know that they are safe and can always come home to us. Even if they have families of their own. They are our babies after all …

I’m still rooting for that perfect date night. Who knows, maybe this Saturday I’ll get lucky! I’ll be keeping you posted as I always do. Tell me what’s going on in your lives, ladies!

– Elisabeth Röhm

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Showing 101 comments

Sara on

What a sweet story!

My parents weren’t nearly as cautious with me. We lived about ten hours from their siblings and parents when I was younger, but when I was almost two, they flew in and they dropped me off at Grandma’s for a week so they could go to San Francisco to celebrate my dad’s birthday!

Pretty much every summer after that, my (younger) brothers and I spent the same week shipped off to aunts’, uncles’, grandparents’ or camp.

It was fun for us, and I’m sure a relief to them :) Everyone needs a vacation!

Indira on

I used to visit my aunts house in NJ all the time for weekends. We all knew during the day it was a blast but, come night I’d be on the phone crying to my mom that I wanted to come home.

By the second day, I was back to loving life but, the first night were always waterworks.

Kris on

I agree – what a sweet story!

We’re in the same boat. My little guy will be 3 next month & has never spent a night away from us (and he’s nowhere near ready yet, either). But it will come – I know the days of not wanting to be seen in public with us are not all that far off. :)

Thank God Aunt Cathy called you & didn’t try to force the issue. It’s just my humble opinion, but it bugs me a little when parents put so much emphasis on meeting their kiddo’s perceived milestones (potty training, sleepovers, counting to 20 & knowing their ABC’s, etc), that they miss out on some of the wonderfulness of their little ones.

When they’re ready, they’ll let us know; and until then, we just try to delight in their day-to-day curiosity & let them spread their wings at their own pace.

lisa on

Sweet story? Why would you drive back. She’d eventually go to sleep. Sounds like a brat.

Jenny on

I liked this story. I would have done the same thing if it was my daughter….and my daughter is far from a brat.

Katya on

Lisa,
That was a mean comment. It doesn’t sound to me like you have any kids.

Elisabeth,
This was a great story and you sound like a great mom. My daughter had her first sleep over at 2 1/2 and I was a nervous wreck. She slept at my best friends house who is also like an “Aunt” She loved it though and I checked several times and was ready to drive over to pick her up if the phone rang. She had a blast though. Hopefully next sleep over will go better for you.

K on

Kris – I loved your comments!

Elisabeth – You sound like a wonderful mom!

AmandaC on

Same boat here too! My 3 year old spent her first over night at a trusted dear friends house as I was 8.5 months pregnant. Called and checked on them and everything was fine! Went to bed and around 10:30pm that darn phone rang. “I’m bringing her home, sorry”.

When she came in she was okay and said to me that she just missed me & her new baby brother (still in my tummy) too much. Melted my heart a little more ;)

Jenn on

I’m glad I’m not the only one who thought that Easton should have stuck it out. Elisabeth sounds like a great mom and I love her blogs, but if that were me as a child, my parents wouldn’t have come and gotten me unless I were sick. I stayed overnight at my aunt’s and my grandmother’s house all the time from a very young age.

Sandi on

I had my nephew at 2 1/2 spend the night and it was his first time, and all worked out perfectly. BUT had he had any crying and wanting to go home I would have called his mother immediately. Come on people sleep overs are great when the kids are ready why push them and just because they cry and want to come does not mean they are “brats”!

laurelcanyonfashionista on

my daughter is 5 and has never been away from us for a night. we are talking about doing a sleepover with one of her kindergarten friends- but not sure if she’s ready. i am thinking we’ll wait another year or two!

plus, my daughter stays up much later than other kids- so i doubt it would work out anyway! haha.

Jen DC on

@ Lisa: Well, you could also choose to think of it this way. You have a friend who has, to date, had mostly charming positive experiences with your child. Do you really want to abandon that person to a screaming, weeping unhappy toddler? Unless it’s absolutely necessary? I don’t think it’s fair to the friend, let alone to the toddler. And at three years old, it’s a little early to turn to your kid and basically tell them “Hey, you’re ON YOUR OWN. SUCK IT UP.”

If she were at an age at which you could negotiate or reason with her – 6 or 7 – you could have a conversation about it. But Easton is not 6 or 7, she’s three. She’s inherently unreasonable. Not her fault, but it’s true. So you deal with her where she is, not where you wish her to be. (And I figure this is why Elisabeth added that this was the right decision *for them*. Luckily you will be able to abandon your unhappy child on a friend at some later date.)

And anyway, if you’re close enough, why not bring her home? Forcing it – particularly at this age – makes them view you differently, it’s a violation of trust. You keep telling them that you’ll always be there, that you will always come for them… until they can understand that this is not always true, i.e. WHEN THEY’RE OLDER, why not keep up the illusion? She got a taste of independence and when it got to be a little too much… She came home. To her mama.

As Kris said, Easton will let you know!

Poor puppy! (And poor car.)

lisa on

easton is a stupid name

Rikki on

I think this is a prime example of how all children are different, and we as parents have to listen to and get to know our kids as individuals.

My daughter, Kay, is now 6, but she had her first sleep over at age 3. She spent the night at the home of one of her preschool friends down the street from me (I was good friends with the mom). Kay knew she could call me if she wanted me and I would have happily gone to get her had she called. There was even a thunderstorm that night, which can be scary in the best circumstances, yet my daughter sleep the whole night without so much as a peep. But Kay is VERY independent and not easily intimidated – she will step boldly into an new experience and is quite the showboat.

But the point is, kids are different. My daughter started her Musical Theatre class by waltzing into the room and introducing herself to the teacher. Other kids sat in the back or didn’t even want to go in at first. Kids are DIFFERENT. I don’t think it is fair to judge what the best way to handle situations like sleepovers is unless you know the individual child. But I am certainly of the mind that forcing a child to stay in an uncomfortable situation can breed mistrust and hesitation for other new experiences. And I think the most important thing a parent should earn from their child (yes EARN) is trust, because it is vital later in life to know that when all else goes wrong your parents will be there for you.

AJ on

This is a very sweet story. She is NOT a brat for wanting to come back home to sleep. It’s called “BABY STEPS”. I did this with my daughter. My child did not stay an entire night with anyone until she was 5 years old. My husband or I were with her every night until she was 5 years old. When I comes to exposing children to new things some children do better with a gradual progression, rather than just a “sink or swim” mentality.

Now, at 9 years old my daughter can sleep over at grandparents and friends houses without any problems. If she has a problem she knows she can call me.

Jillian on

Why should the child be forced to stay and be upset? If the parents were out of town, sure. But they were within reach. I can’t imagine calling a child a brat because of this. I feel horrible for your children if you have them.

Forcing them to do something they aren’t ready to do can be traumatizing.

Toya L. on

My younger children have never stayed the night with anyone, the oldest was 6. I definitely think they shouldn’t have forced a 2 year old to stay if she didn’t want to.

Melanie on

Let’s just ignore Lisa, she’s clearly a troublemaker given her two comments.

I think you made the right choice, especially given what you said in the last paragraph. So true. Maybe she’ll be ready this weekend.

Eliana on

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with Easton not being ready for a sleepover. Elisabeth did the right thing – for HER child – and that’s what a good mom does. Easton now feels secure, knowing that her mom will come get her and that her mom is there for her. That’s important for a toddler, especially one who has never been away from her parents for the night.

Had they forced the issue and made her stay – it would have possibly been difficult to get Easton to the point of wanting to try it again. By picking her up – no harm was done and she’s still eager to try it again.

Sarah K. on

I think she definitely did what was right for her family. Easton is only three and it’s ok if she wants to come home.

And Lisa, why are you being a troll?

Jessica on

The only reason I come to “People” is to read Elisabeth’s blog. I love the way she writes and LOVE her daughter’s name. Wonderful story.

Sophia on

Great story. I guess the age of being “sleepover-ready” really depends on the child, I know that from that age of 2 I was regularly staying over at my grandma’s house without incident, but my youngest sister, the baby of the family and a mummy’s girl, didn’t stay the night until she was 8 because she didn’t want to be away from my mum. It’s good that your sister recognised she wasn’t ready and that Easton now has a clean slate on which to try again later.

By the way, LOVE the name Easton! Definitely one of my favourites :)

Anonymous on

The kid was not “ready” because the parents seem like overprotective crazy people. You haven’t had a night alone in 3 years, that’s just ridiculous. I hope they have the money to keep their kid in a protective bubble her whole life

Monica on

If you are going to post something that you think will cause problems at least be man or woman enough to put your name- don’t go hiding behind “Anonymous”. At least have the courage to stand behind what you say!

Courtney on

Wow, my experience as a mom so far as been quite different in this department than Elisabeth’s. I don’t really get the not going away with your husband overnight for THREE YEARS. There is no way that could happen for us.

My husband is my best friend. The person I chose to have children with, to spend my life with. I firmly believe if you don’t nurture that relationship just as much as your child’s, you are doing your whole family a disservice. And for us, that means getting away for a night, a weekend, or a week to reconnect and to remember what makes us US. And then we always come back refreshed and better parents.

I also believe it takes a village to raise a child. My toddler has been having overnight’s with her grandparents since she was 7 months old. Our first overnight trip away was horrible at first, I missed her so bad. But guess what! She is now 2.5 and totally at ease and comfortble sleeping away from us (she has not slept anywhere else other than her two sets of grandparents’ homes. Her first slumber party with a friend is still a ways off:)

I love that I am raising a flexible, loving, non-clingy child. She is assertive, independent, stubborn, loves other peole and NOT just Mom and Dad, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

In Washington on

My son just turned 4 and has never spent a night away from us. I adore my husband and work every day to make sure we have a good/happy marriage. But at the end of the day, my son is the most important person in my life. So, if he’s not ready for a “sleepover” until he’s 10 then so be it. We will have many “alone” nights when he goes off to college.

Thank you for sharing Elisabeth! This was a great story :)

SarahJane on

I think three is a little young to make a child stay overnight somewhere if they’re not comfortable. It’s not a lesson like putting toys away or eating broccoli. She’s still excited to spend the night away. Forcing her to sleep somewhere she doesnt want to will likely make her not want to try it again. She also knows that if she really needs to come home, she can.

Linda on

Why doesnt this mother grow some balls and tell her daughter no. No I am not going to come an pick you up, you are fine. She would have fallen asleep and that would have been that. Its people like this mother, that have no balls. They let their kids run their lives.

I am a parent and I have never, not once, let my child sleep in my bed. He is 5 and he is an independent boy. He doesnt need mommie to pick him up and hold his hand. And as for not getting any with my husband, I feel sorry for her husband. She is putting her daughter 1st and that is not ok.

Children are like dogs, you tell them what to do and they listen. They dont have free run of your life or your house. At least not in mine. Grow some balls woman.

Michelle on

What a great story! Funny, funny! I am now a Mom-Mom ( Grandma ) but remember those days with my little one’s, my son more than my daughter. He is 15 & I just went 2 weeks ago @ 2am to get him because he was “uncomfortable” and I am with you, they should never feel that way. I feel home is our sanctuary, so much so my 24 yr old came home w/ her little one, my Austin Shane, AKA Aussie Bear! Maybe I shouldn’t make it so comfortable, LOL, JK!

Thx for sharing, have a great weekend all! I hope your date night comes sooner than later!

Puffin on

I think you’re seriously brave for sharing your parenting experiences in what can be a very critical website – no doubt your blog will help others who are open to hearing what you have to say! Keep up the good work, I think you’re a great writer.

denise charette rentschler on

My daughter is 7, almost 8, and we have never been away from her. Our older children, both boys aged 19 and 15, were probably around 5 or 6 when we took a couple of long weekends.

We don’t expect to go away anytime soon because we can not afford it. Our eldest son’s college is $48,000 per year, so our money goes to college, not travel. If you travel, do it while they are young because the expense of orthodontists, private schools(if that is an option), cars, mission trips to Peru, proms, etc. take lots of money! And they are only little once! Wait until they are older, so it is not so tramatic.

We may try to go away next year for 4 days for my 50th birtday, provided my father and boys can all take care of her. My daughter loves lots of attention and she deserves it! Good parents make sacrifices, so don’t travel unless your child is emotionally ready!!

Lynne on

Being patient with kids is the most important thing. My daughter started sleeping at her Grandma’s around age three with no problems. However, when she turned 8, she refused to sleep anywhere but home. She declined all offers from her friends, and instead we had a sleepover at our house most weekends (it did get tiring!). This lasted for THREE YEARS. Most folks criticized us and told us to force her do it, that we give her too much power, and we need to do it to show her who’s boss. We refused. How do you force a child that says they “can’t leave you because they will miss you too much” with tears in their eyes? I am glad we followed our instinct. She is now a very confident 12 year-old that we can barely keep at home!

Linda on

wow, your daughter is 7 and you are almost 50??! That SUCKS! I had both my kids at 26 and 30 and I do NOT want to be taking care of children when at 50 you should be traveling !

look on

3 years old is WAY TOO YOUNG for a sleep over. Why would they even attempt it, especially since she says she had a feeling the phone would ring that night.

It’s not worth a blog to have your daughter live through the fear that comes at 3 when forced to spend the night at a strange house because mommy and daddy need 24 hours away from her. Really?

RachelinAZ on

My kids (3 and 4) have been away from “us” only once. And while it went well, if they were not ready, we would have come and gotten them. Luckily they were OK with it, but if the person watching them, knows them well, I see nothing wrong with it.

I do not think Easton is a brat or her parents are pushovers. If “Aunt Cathy” felt she was not ready, someone who knows Easton well, then I think it is fine mom and dad came to get her.

Linda on

Is it just me, or did she say when her and her husband were alone they couldnt find anythng to do so they went window shopping?? UM, that is pretty sad. Whenever me and my husband get the chance, we strip down and hump. Why she wouldnt want to go home and have wild sex all night is beyond me! This is another relationship that is going to end up in divorce because the psycho mom neglects her husband and he is going to cheat on her. lol .. what a dumb idiot

Tracy on

My ex was the oldest of 10, so we had a never-ending supply of sitters. I think the kids all started with sleeping over at a relative’s home from the time they were 2, and we never had to deal with the tears from being away from Mommy. If I remember correctly, it was me who worried the most about how everyone was handling the separation.

Terry on

Loved this story. The treehouse sounds like every little girls dream, and I hope Easton enjoys it. Just wanted to comment on the last part of the blog.

“Even when they are all grown-up, we want our kids to know that they are safe and can always come home to us. Even if they have families of their own. They are our babies after all …”

That is exactly how I feel, and believe me, I’ve taken much grief for those feelings from family. But like you said, Elisabeth, they are our babies after all.

Lynne on

I’m thinking Lisa and Linda are the same person. Both blatantly trying to cause drama.

Littl e Mo on

I won’t call the child a brat – not that she may not be, just that I don’t konw – but I don’t agree with rushing right over and getting her, either. My niece started spending weekends with me when she was 2 months old. My sister and her husband missed her terribly but it was for my niece’s benefit as much as it was for theirs, in a way more so. As she grew older ny niece learned that being away from her parents wasn’t something to fear but that they would never abandon her and would always come back for her.

I don’t think giving in to a child like ER and her fiance does the child any favors. It just teaches them the bad habit that if they fuss enough they’ll get what they want which is no good for anyone. What would Elisabeth and Ron, or any parents, do if there was an emergency and Mommy and Daddy couldn’t rush right over? And even if that never happens, what are they going to do if the child decides they don’t want to stay alone at school? I can in 1st grade the kids who had to be sent to the nurse for hyperventilating they cried so much for their parents. Parents who give in all the time aren’t doing it for the child – they’re doing that for themselves so they don’t have to deal with the tears and/or the temper.

Crystal on

I get the patience thing, ya sure. I guess it depends on how you are choosing to bring your child up. In our house, 2 boys: 4 and 3 1/2 with a baby girl due any day, we have decided to stay close to our immediate family and that has major impact on children. They love and trust their grandparents, aunts and uncles, so much. This makes us feel whole. I could not imagine having to raise children away from their grandparents, my parents did it with my sister and I, so I know first hand it sucks.

Also my boys are very close, they have each other, scenarios are almost always different with only children. I guess I have always witnessed them to be more clingy, whiny little things, but again depends what you do with your kids or what activities you put them in. My boys have been having sleep overs since 6months(although most nights we crept in for sleep overs our selves after our night out), and I trust %100 who ever is looking after my children to do just that, look after them, they make sure they are comfortable, safe and loved right there even without us.

I could not imagine not having OUR time alone, our family pratically has to beg to take our children, I don’t just pawn them off all the time, but I certainly do not see anything wrong with having a night out. We’re still young, have friends, like to be social and our kids are super close with their immediate family because of their convenience.

Becky on

Our daughter is now 12. She started spending the night at my in-laws when she was about 3 months old. My mother in law was a flight attendant. So, when Grammy was in town, she wanted as much time with her as possible. My mother watched her while we worked. She has always been a trooper.

For us it took the whole village. Thank goodness it worked for our daughter. She has traveled all over the United States with her Grammy. Her first trip was at 4yo. In laws and she flew to Chicago to play in the snow one weekend. She is spoiled, but not a brat. She is the only grandchild and is loved very much.

12kewkadook on

Well, I’m sorry the date didn’t work out but I’m sure Easton will be ready soon! And Linda? TMI!

Christine on

Linda, I saw you made a comment about someone becoming a parent in her 40’s and you not being able to imagine that. I have a cousin who was 49 and 50 when his kids were born. They are now 2 yrs and 9 months old. He didn’t even get married for the first time until he was 48. So, whereas it was ok for you to get married and have kids in your 20’s, that isn’t how it always works for everyone. I give Denise credit for wanting to become a mother for a third time in her 40’s. To each their own.

Vicky on

1st Props to everyone for ignoring Lisa & Linda….

2nd – Elisabeth, you did the right thing and you know what is best for your kid. i didn’t leave me daughter overnight until she was 3. But I had the luxury of living with my parents so she was in her own house with her two most favorite people. She cried her first night at my sisters and I went and got her…no questions asked. It is about trust…

3rd – My daughter is now 9 1/2 and up till recently wouldn’t sleep anywhere without me…but this weekend she made her own plans for a weekend away at her father’s house and I’m prou of her because she is finding her wings, on her terms!

Betty Jo on

I am a mother of three and while I understand that you want your daughter to feel loved and protected, she must also feel independent. You cannot be there for her at all times. She is 3 years old and goes to school and does other activities without her parents, spending the night with a beloved “Aunt” would have been very good for her.

Veronica on

Don’t worry – it will be right for your family when it is. Our son (only child!) just had his first sleep-over at my brother’s home, with his cousins, just about 6 months ago. When we picked him up the next morning, he said “I don’t understand the fuss about sleep-overs – I’m never doing that again!”. Now I can relax until the next time:-)

Oh, I forgot to mention – he is 12 years old!! They get there in their own time and in their own way – just enjoy your precious time with her. They really do grow up so quickly!

Gigi on

I never got to experience the child who didnt want to leave Mommy. My daughter, now 6, was in GrammaCare since 3 months old. She has always been comfortable with her “second” mom and never batted an eyelash if I had to leave her overnight due to work schedules. She has always been a forward looking kid, always excited to see what was coming and not so much concerned about what was left behind. Her first day of Kindergarten was a “goodby Mom” and a wave and she was on her way to a new adventure. Sometimes I think I missed out on the little one who didnt want to leave her mom, but I know she is comfortable in new situations like I never was at her age.

Elisabeth is blessed with such a sweet little girl. I understand her comment about not knowing what to do with your time when you get it alone. Having time away from your kids is not all about sex, although it is nice not to worry if you locked the door! :o)

My husband and I experienced the same thing a few times when we were out to dinner by ourselves, it is hard to put aside the conversations about the kids and focus just on yourselves. But it is good to have that time for yourselves, healthy parental relationships need it.

Amanda on

I think this is a lovely sweet story, but I also don’t think this would be the right approach for many. As a child of divorced parents (divorced before I was two) I can’t imagine not doing sleepovers. And though one could argue I was always with a parent, my dad was definitely not the hands on parent and I always missed my mom.

But even before their divorce, I stayed with grandparents. Though I did miss my mom and cry sometimes when I stayed places, I think the experience was good for me as it taught me how to comfort myself and taught me boundaries. My mother (and parents that are raising children together) sometimes needed her time and space, as much as she loved me.

think it is great to consider your children’s opinions and wants, but sometimes as a parent I think you need to make the hard decision to let your kids stick it out. It hurts, because you want to fix it for them, but sometimes children need to hurt to learn (as was the case with the story of the ‘death’ of Easton’s stuffed duck). Perhaps it was right to rescue Easton this time, obviously you know your child best, but there will come a time when she should stick it out, even if it is uncomfortable and a little scary for you and her.

JD on

So very sad that there are some seriously negative people on these blogs.

To Lisa… a child who is not ready (at only 3 years old), should NOT be forced to stay at a friend of the family’s for the night. That is unhealthy. Elisabeth handled this beautifully. Easton WILL be able to sleep over when she is ready. Forcing a child too soon causes them to grow up bitter… and they end up calling other people’s children’s brats.

And to Linda… who thinks humping is the only way to have a happy marriage… I have been married nearly 20 years and we DO find fun things to do that don’t always involve having sex. We have a grown up, monogamous and very real relationship. And Linda, there is nothing wrong with having your first child in your early 40’s. I know a lot of people who lived their life… traveled, had their relationships and careers, bought their first home and THEN started a family. They are all very happy and are very fulfilled. They had their children when they were matured and READY… and those children are very HAPPY and well-adjusted children! Too many babies are having babies nowadays. It’s refreshing to see mature parents raising children.

After all,it’s these children who will rule the world one day. And don’t we prefer they have good heads on their shoulders? How does that saying go ya’ll? Judge not lest ye be judged? You’re doing great Elisabeth! Keep up the great mommying!

Darla on

Great story and a parents first job is to make their kids feel safe & that mom & dad are there for them.

I was not an overprotective mom but my daughter didn’t like sleepovers till she hit her late teens and then she would still call at times and say MOM, I want to come home. I would say, you never have to ask to come home, just come. I know that when I go to visit my dad in NC that I always feel safe & secure sleeping in the same house with my dad. He was and is my loving protector. Glad I could do the same for my kids.

Every child should feel like they can come home no matter what.

jessicad on

Lisa and Linda are definitely the same person, how weird to spend so much time commenting and trying to start trouble for no reason. It’s really kind of sad.

Concerning the sleep over, I think Elisabeth did the right thing. Some kids just aren’t ready at that age. No way I could relax knowing my daughter was upset and I wasn’t there.

When I get a break from my daughter the only thing I want to do is SLEEP! :)

Cheryl on

These are the symptoms of “helicopter” parents. I have kept my grandkids overnight since they were babies. My grandsons are 5 now and sometimes they still have a little “burp” right at bedtime but we have lots of kisses and hugs from grandma and grandpa and they go right to sleep and sleep through the night. You are not doing your child any favors by making her so dependent on you and her dad.

Colleen on

I think that this is one of the sweetest stories I have read in a long time! As I was reading this I was watching my baby girl (who, by the way, just turned 7 on July 9th!) sleep and I was thinking back to the times when her father and I (sadly we are no longer together but we can both come together and be wonderful co-parents to Hannah without actually being together) first had her and how scary it was to let her go to her first sleep over (more for us than her). It amazes me how fast they grow up!

I also have a son who is going to be 11 in September. The first time I let me dad take him overnight I had to fight myself not to turn around and go get him. I think that, even though it must be hard for you and your husband, making the decision not to leave your daughter with her nanny overnight truly shows how much you love and care for your daughter and how much you want her to feel safe at making the decision to stay overnight somewhere HER decision and not one that you guys make because you just need a “break”.

I can’t wait to read more about your families adventures.

Heidi on

Why not have Aunty Cathy come over to Easton’s house for a sleepover? We tried sending our daughter for a sleepover at Grandma’s house when she was 3, but it just ended with us picking her up at 10:00pm. When the grandparents came here though for the sleepover, our 3 year old and 1 year old slept in their own beds no problem!! We had a lovely 24 childless hours!!

Sophia on

Wow Linda, I kind of feel sorry for your son. He’s only 5 and he’s not allowed in your bed, you don’t pick him up or hold his hand? Obviously I don’t know you and I’m not having a dig at you as a parent, but, I mean… don’t you want to cuddle him and be near him?

Jessica on

I’m not Lisa or Linda and I think it’s nuts too!

I raised an incredible young man, he’s 21 and a Junior at a private university. He is the kind of child every parent hopes for; he has never caused me one sleepless night. While he is a fine young man and everyone adores him, he is a flexible independent thinker.

Easton does indeed sound like she runs the household. I can promise you when she’s about (14) and staying out all night and talking back to her mother because her father will have left for someone who shows him some attention, it will be too late.

Children today run the family and that’s why we have so many divorces.

Jessica on

This sounds like a marriage already in trouble. Little Easton is going to be (30) someday and still living at home. The parents need a life beyond their child. If she does by the Grace of God move out, the parents won’t even know each other if their still together.

CT on

My daughter had never been able to make it completely through the night sleeping anywhere. She would have a great time until it was time to go to bed, then she would freak and call me.

At the age of nine, due to a business trip we were forced to leave her with my sister. I have dubbed her mother of the century. When my daughter was crying and missing her mom, she told her “it was okay to miss her mom, and okay to cry if she felt like it. My sister stayed with her the whole time she was crying until she fell asleep. This happened two nights in a row. By the third night, I was getting a good night call, I miss you and I love you and I’m going to bed now.

Now, at the age of 18 she still prefers the comfort and safety of her own bed. That’s okay with me.

Colleen on

It sounds to me like this “Lisa” or “Linda” character did NOT have a very good childhood and is now trying to take it out on people that really could care less. I don’t understand why someone would say things like that! Maybe they have to stop sending there child away with everyone and start keeping them home with them because they obviously have way to much time on there hands to be sitting here criticizing everyone else for the way they parent.

I must say that I pretty much agree with everyone else. You should let your children let you know how they feel about certain situations and then show them that you care by trying to fix that situation. If you just let your child “suck it up” and stay over someones house when they don’t want to be there then maybe there is a good reason why they don’t want to be there whether it’s because they just miss you or, god forbid, someone is actually hurting them. If you don’t listen to your child and be there for them then they are never going to feel safe going to you with there problems and that could just send them going to the wrong person to get help.

Good luck to all the parents out there and I hope you all get the rest and lovin’ you deserve. :)

Royan on

My son is 18 and still hasn’t slept away from his parents. He’s slept in other places, and on the ground outside, but not away from a parent. He has slept at HOME when his parents were somewhere else, but has never had a “sleepover” when parents weren’t there. My niece never did either until she left for college. My son is off to college in September.

Nothing about policy or plan here, that’s just the way it happened. I wonder if the daughter would have had so much trouble if she were in her own bed in her own house? Don’t know.

CT on

Jessicad is right, i could never sleep or be comfortable knowing my daughter was scared and wanting her mom. 3 years is young for a sleep over but she could have done fine and it could have been the start of having a few nights to themselves once in a while.

I do have to say that my niece did it right. Her son as an infant was left overnight with his grandparents and aunts and sometimes friends. Not a choice, and not often but at times work schedules demanded it. I have to say that, because he started so young, as a toddler he is perfectly fine spending the night away from mom and dad.

Beck-a-la on

I was always the kid that called home late at night asking my mother to come rescue me – and she ALWAYS did. I loved her for that. And I loved knowing that if I needed her, she would come.

When my son went to his first sleep-over I anticipated “the call” but it never came. I’m not sure I crossed his mind because he was ready and having too much fun! But, had he called, I would have come. That’s what we moms do! :)

Traci on

The few people who’ve commented that Easton should’ve stuck it out need to get a life. For gosh sakes – she’s 3 years old. What the heck. I would’ve gone and picked my child up too if they weren’t ready for a sleepover. My kids are 22, 22, and 19 and would still go pick them up if they called me crying.

Keep your negative comments to yourselves. Also, why did you even bother reading the story? It must’ve interested you some. Think about it you idiots.

guest on

Love your parenting philosophies, but she’s a little young for a sleepover. You are a great mom. Love that you never spank/hit and you nurture and protect her, as every mom should!

Marisa on

Beautiful story – thank you so much for having the courage to share your writing with everyone. I enjoy reading your blog, and seeing your perspective on parenting. I would have done the same thing – I strive to enforce the knowledge in my child that he can call on me at any time and I’ll be there for him. He’s almost 9, and because of my erratic work schedule (I’m a single mom) has been spending the night with grandparents from the time he was a baby; however, I too have gotten late-night calls and have gone running to pick him up. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Anonymous on

Our oldest is 24 and if she wasn’t married and owned her own home, she would still be sleeping with mom and dad. Our middle one is 21 and could not wait for sleepovers. Our youngest is 19 and still lives at home.

3 different children, 3 different needs, and I would have it any other way!

Li-Li on

I would have gotten my child too! I’m not a mom, but the thought of my baby crying because this the first time she or he is away from home would make my kid free night suck because all I’d be thinking about is how my child is not enjoying themselves.

connie on

I don’t have any kids, and I thought this story was adorable. Really heartfelt from a mother who was genuinely worried and cared about her adorable daughter.

Kim on

It’s not like she was sending the kid off to summer camp–it was a one-night sleepover. Don’t think she will be scarred for life even if mama hadn’t rushed over to get her!

m on

I don’t think there was any reason to force her to stay. My two oldest (3 and 4) have slept over at my mom’s and grandmother’s houses numerous time. They love it and look forward to it every time. When my daughter was two she also slept over with a long-time family friend and her two preteen daughters who adored her. She did fine and cried when I came to pick her up!

That said, I would have picked her up if/when she was homesick for me. For her sake and for the sake of the family member/friend. Although, my grandmother once brought my daughter home at 1 am–from 2 hours away– because she was crying for me (turns out she had a toothache), and by the time she woke up she wanted to go back. So sometimes there is merit in sticking it out.

Cindy on

Why would you have children if you don’t want to be the one raising them? The negative comments are not necessary. Everyone parents differently. There is nothing wrong with making your child feel safe and loved. My kids have sleepovers once in a while and I travel without my family once in a while too. While it is hard on both ends, it is worth it. However, that does not mean that the parents who do not leave their children overnight are bad parents headed for divorce. Get real negative people. Relationships are hard and so is parenting.

By the way, talking about humping and wild sex just makes you sound cheap and trashy.

Debbie Shepherd on

My children are both grown now, but when they were small, they would go for occasional over-night visits and sometimes longer with their aunt. At first, I would be all excited about having a little break. But usually within the hour, I would begin missing them terribly, and calling to see how they were and what they were doing.

I appreciate how you are taking time and savoring the time with your daughter as she grows. They grow up much too fast!! My only regret is being so busy as a single parent that I didn’t enjoy their childhoods as much as I wish I had now! Wishing you always the best.

Micki on

The dog barfing in the car just put me over the edge laughing! I’m sure most of us (but not all) can relate to this exact scenario and while reading I was indeed re-living sleepovers with my kids when they were small, LOL.

Parenting is parenting no matter who you are or how much money you have and these kind of stories just remind us of that.

look on

How is this a sweet story?

The child’s own mother isn’t aware that she’s not ready for a sleep over at age three, how well does she know this little girl? And why is she trying to get away from her for 24 hours? It’s not like she’s got three kids all under age four and hasn’t had a free day to herself in years.

I just can’t imagine having a gut feeling that my little girl wasn’t old enough to spend the night in a strange house but making her try it anyway–at three–so that I could hang out with my fiance.

Again, how is that a sweet story?

lisa on

I’m not Linda… I just think she’s hovering… she should’ve let dumb name sleep away from her from the get go. Now dumb name is so spoiled and so accommodated that she can’t imagine being away for one night. Elisabeth said it herself- dumb name was fine when she went to pick her up. They are raising a horrible brat.

dsfg on

Wow, Look, there’s nothing wrong with a parent wanting to spend one night away from her child in 3 years . . .

Jackie on

I don’t understand why everyone is criticizing Elisabeth?

My child who is now 4 almost 5 has spent the night at my mothers since she was 3 months old, my son who is 4 months old on the other hand has never been away from me and but he loves other people too.

Everyone raises their children differently, some people grow more attached to their children than others. When my daughter is away I probably call my moms house 3-5 times to talk to my daughter.

Every kid is different and they should be nurtured not discouraged, they should be able to call mommy when they feel they need to!

Jackie on

Lisa there is something terribly wrong with you to be calling a 3 year old names like “brat” and “dumb name”, I can’t even imagine what your kids are like if you even have any. It’s people like you who make this world so rotten to live in now a days.

Momblogger on

I’m a mom blogger also and I loved sharing my experiences and hearing most people’s responses; however, the negative comments took the joy out of it and so I stopped.

It is very difficult to put any mothering experience out to the world and not receive judgment and criticism. It’s very unfortunate. Hope you can look past the people who love to judge.

Harmony on

Lisa, Why do you care so much? If you don’t like it, MOVE ON!

Bobbi on

Elisabeth,

For my money you did exactly the right thing picking your daughter up. When I was seven my parents sent me to a sleep-away camp and I was sooo homesick I cried every night I was there. They finally came to get my on day three. I still think it’s one of the kindest things they ever did for me; putting my needs first and driving 2+ hours to pick up their little girl (who had begged to be allowed to go in the first place!). I just wasn’t ready and they recognized it…the next year I went back and had a wonderful time!

Claudia on

My mom in Germany and my nephew tizian were trying the same thing with a sleepover when he was 5, and that was the first time for him. The first night was a no go as yours was. Everything went well until it was bedtime. And my sister came and picked him up, and his 3 year old sister Fiona.

They gave it another try after a few weeks, because he wanted to and it worked, but needless to say it was a sleepless night for my mom, since he woke up at 3 am and wanted to go home then. But my mom stood her ground and said in 3 hours it gets light out and they can watch a kidsshow etc. and he fell back asleep. He was sooooo proud of himself and it was such a great expirience for him, it will happen for you too!! Good luck!!

Beth on

When I was 8, I went away to camp for a week. I got really homesick, and the counselors and camp staff wouldn’t let me call home or tell my parents that I wanted to go home. I made it through the week and ended up having a decent time by the end, but it took me MANY years before I was willing to try going away again. If they had let me go home, I don’t think I would have been so scared to try again – but the fear of feeling so horrible again and being powerless to do anything about it meant that I didn’t go anywhere for more than a night until I was 15.

I know Easton is only 3, but kids remember stuff like this. I think her parents did the right thing. It’s not about helicopter parenting or tough love…it is about making the child feel secure, something that will make her a more independent, self-confident person as she gets older.

cheryl on

The writer is not looking for approval. She wrote a very sweet story about her daughter and their bond. We as mothers make the decisions that are best for our children without the input of others. And to the writer that called her a brat, you can’t possibly be a mother, and if I called it right, stay that way until you grow a heart.

Cyndi on

Miss Elisabeth, As the mama of 8 youngins, how you handled this situation was exactly right. Even though my children have always had each other, you would think that going on a sleepover would be a breeze?! WRONG!!! It takes a child, whether an only child or with siblings, time to be truely ready for sleepovers away from home. Home is where their security is and no matter how great the bond or friendship is between child and sleepover buddy, the feeling of security isn’t there.

My youngins have slept over with grandparents, aunts & uncles, as well as friends and they always have to call home at least half-a-dozen times before going to bed, unless they want to come home. If they do call and want to come home, I always go get them. Children have to know they can always go home! It is the only way they learn that feeling of security extends to grandma/grandpa, aunty/uncle, and friends homes.

RuddyZooKeeper on

Nighttime, quiet, laying down, in the dark, alone: the very act of “going to sleep” leaves us in our most vulnerable state. If my children are uncomfortable or afraid to make themselves vulnerable by sleeping away from home, then I remove them from that situation. It’s not about teaching a lesson like don’t touch a hot stove or put your toys away. The act of sleeping involves a trust so complete and personal that it should never be forced. We should never tell our children that if something makes them anxious or afraid for their safety they should disregard their instincts and “stick it out.” Though we may (should) trust the caregiver/sitter implicitly, they may not have earned our child’s trust yet. I know it’s a bit of a stretch from the original topic, but if we are telling our kids to place trust in adults who haven’t earned it and to ignore their “survival” instincts, then we are laying a foundation for trouble in the future. Bottom line, kids should sleep away from home only when they feel comfortable doing so.

Leni on

Elisabeth,let me say that I follow your blog and that Easton is such an adorable little face. She reminds me of my daughter, who will be 4 in November.

My daughter and her twin brother were ready for a sleepover a few days ago. We could have tried it way sooner, if we had someone trustworthy and really close to us, but we don’t. So we left the twins while we were visiting my husband’s parents and we went out with old friends.

I think the kids weren’t quite ready before. Now they can fully understand the concept that mom and dad need some time alone and that grandma can take care of any of their needs and that they will see us when they wake up, in the morning. They also kept quiet, in the morning, an grandma kept them entertained, until we woke up.

It was just sweet, when we kissed them goonight and promised to babysit for them when they will have their kids and need time with husband or wife! They really appreciated our offer to babysit for them when that time comes.

denise charette rentschler on

To Linda, it does not “Suck” to have a healthy, bright, beautiful daughter at 41.

I am the eldest of 4 daughters and my late mother was very difficult due to serious mental health issues. I extended an olive branch to my mother and asked her to be my daughter’s godmother.

After the baptism, my mother was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma at died late December 2006 at just 65. My 3 year old daughter brought joy to me while I watched my mother painfully die. I had my first child at 30. second at 34, third at 39(miscarriage) and last miracle, my daughter, at 41.

Children are a blessing. YOUR TIME is no longer your own. TRAVELLING will have to wait. Spending time with my kids, whether we go to the park, a movie or simply curl up with a book in my big brass bed, makes me content.

One day soon, I will take my three kids on some amazing adventures when we have the time and money.

Kacey on

I have to say that I agree with Lisa and Linda. Easton rules that house and Elisabeth is going to grow to regret it.

My 17-year old daughter is an only child, and the most important thing in the world to my husband and I. But, we do not and never have let her make the decisions for our house. We made sure she knew our families even if it meant traveling (my family was close, his in another state), and she was sleeping over with grands and aunts and uncles by the time she was 6 mos. old. She knew we were coming back and we got the biggest smile when we got there, but she didn’t cry about being left with other people who loved her.

Maybe with all Elisabeth’s money, she ought to have made sure her child could feel secure with other relatives. Helicopter parent doesn’t begin to describe what Elisabeth says in every blog. I pity her child – she is going to be a problem her whole life, and as someone above said, when she rebels, it’s gonna be ugly – and then we’ll hear how Elisabeth did everything right, EXCEPT TEACH HER CHILD HOW TO BE INDEPENDENT AND POLITE.

We’ve listened to Elisabeth debating the co-sleeping thing (how ridiculous!!), and melt-downs in the mall (never reprimanded the child!) and now her child can’t even spend ONE night away from mommy without whining.

I agree with so many posters on here who say the fiance-never-to-be-husband will be long gone while Elisabeth is still coddling this child that she has allowed to control her.

Ayana on

I really enjoy reading this blog and all the comments. My husband and I have not yet been blessed with children but I am learning things about being a parent from all of you. I never really thought about the whole sleep over thing but you all make good points. Picking up a child from a situation where they are starting to feel uncomfortable shows that you can be trusted to be there when they need you. I also think kids need to be independent. I guess it’s good to see that there are so many good parents out there that are paying attention to what is best for their child/ren. Keep up the good work all of you and be blessed.

Aja on

I can see both points. Our oldest (2.5 yrs) is SUPER close with my parents and often asks to stay the night at their house, and does fine. But one night recently, he told his Nina several times that he wanted to “go home and sleep with Mommy and Daddy and his baby brother.” So my mom brought him home to us.

But the other night my son was there and when it was time to go to bed he asked to come home. It was storming and when my mom called I said she needed to tell him it was storming and we couldn’t go out in it, so he needed to sleep there. And he did fine.

Parenting is largely a balancing act- rarely do extremes of any kind work.

momo2 on

I guess this is one that really is a personal decision, I had my then 3 yrold nephew stay overnight when his older sister had a broken arm and the parents were at the hospital with her, it was his first time in another home for the night, and as stressful as it was for everybody we did our best to make him feel confortable, and since there was no opt out, we took it as it was, of course he cried around 10pm, he only knew his sister was sick and wanted to be with his mom, but calmly and with lots of love, my kids and I made our best to keep him entertained and reassured, finally he did fall asleep after talking with mom over the phone….so in case of emergency you have to make do, if you have the choice of picking your little one and bring them home, why not?

my own kids didnt have sleepovers until they were older, around 5 and they begged for weeks to stay at their cousins house, dropped them and they forgot about me completely ! haha….

Anonymous on

How easy it is to judge someone’s parenting skills just from some blog postings. I’m sure we all as parents do things that others disapprove of, yet the majority of us end up having happy, healthy & well-adjusted kids.

I’m not sure how anyone can leap to a conclusion that Easton is going to be “a brat” and/or mom & dad won’t be together years from now. Sounds like a great work of fiction, but not based in fact at all.

Elisabeth thanks for taking a risk & sharing your stories – your daughter sounds wonderful!

Heidi Fischer on

I believe Lisa and Linda are a one-in-the-same miserable person…
Anyway, each parent has to make a decision like this one based on their family structure, ideas, and desires. There is no right or wrong answer here. The only advice I would give is to put your marriage first through out all the “kid years”, which I know is difficult to do but very necessary.

My daughter just graduated college and my son is now a sophomore there, yet I am ending a 25 year marriage because we did put all of our time, energy, money, passion, etc…into raising two amazing human beings. And wouldn’t change either one of them for the world! But the truth is that a marriage takes a great deal of nurturing as well or it will not be there when the kids are grown and out of the house!

april on

I was lucky that we lived next door to my Nana and Aunt so I had sleepovers from the time I could walk. I LOVED going over there because I knew I was going to be treated like royalty. LOL. I was never the homesick kid. I used to invite myself to my friends’ houses all the time, to the embarrassment of my parents.

I think it’s important for a child to feel safe but I also think it’s important for them to be brave and know that it’s OK to stay the night somewhere that’s not familiar and that they WILL SURVIVE. Sometimes mommy and daddy need time away for each other. my parents went on vacations sometimes without us, once when I was 4 and my brother was 2. we stayed with my Nana and Aunt who we adored and my brother was a little ticked when my parents came home but it was their 10 yr anniversary and they deserved it.

i would just caution to not shelter your kids so much that they become a nervous wreck. (sidenote, having your kids sleep in your bed when they are 3 sounds crazy to me but that’s another story…that could be hindering little Easton’s independence as well).

Jennifer on

I find it really telling and quite ironic that the one person on here who keeps telling posters that they are stupid and to shut up doesn’t even have the guts to post her own name…she’s only “Anonymous.” Coward, much? Maybe that’s why you post mean remarks and then hide behind the anonymity. Someone monitoring this site should kick you and your comments off or block you from commenting permanently on this site.

fuzibuni on

Elisabeth, I really appreciate your blogs… you are always so open and honest. Please don’t change because of a few meanies!

I think how you approached the sleepover was perfect. Picking Easton up when she got lonely was absolutely the right decision. It could have backfired if you didn’t respond and she might have ended up even more scared next time.

I was one of those kids who always got homesick on sleepovers. There were many times that my mom came to get me. She would always reassure me that we could try again next time and she never made me feel bad about it.

It took me a long time to feel comfortable being in a new place without my parents. Even when I left for college across the country I had the same feelings, but I was secure enough to realize it would pass and I stuck out the homesickness and made friends.

But I remember when I was 8 my mom made plans for me to stay at a friends house for 3 days. It was my childhood best friend who had moved 2 hours away and we didn’t see each other often anymore.

My friend’s mom met us half way, and I took my little suitcase to their house. We were all having a nice time playing until it got dark and everyone started to settle into their nighttime routines. I started to feel so lonely for my mom, and couldn’t stop sobbing that I needed her. A phone call was made, and my friend’s mom drove half way back to meet my mom. I felt so bad that everyone went out of their way for me like that, but I felt such a huge sense of relief knowing my mom was there for me no matter what.

It’s funny to remember how hard it was for me to be on my own when I was little because as an adult I’ve traveled the world and lived in many different cities on my own. I’ve been complimented on how independent I am… but I certainly wasn’t that way as a child.

I think one of the reasons I’ve felt secure enough to explore the world in my adult life is due to the consistent nurturing of my parents who proved that they were there with unconditional love and support no matter what.

PS. I’ve always thought Easton is a beautiful name for a beautiful child. Never mind the person who said differently above.

Shannon on

Ladies, most of us on here are at a consensus in that Elisabeth is right to not force the issue and let her daughter indicate when she is ready to spend a night away from mom and dad.

It is however different for everyone! My daughter (who is 5) had her first sleepover at my mother’s house when she was several months old, and has been doing it ever since. My son, who is almost 3, hasn’t had any sleepovers yet. Every parent is different, and every kid is different.

Elisabeth, I give you so much credit for seemingly raising your beautiful daughter with so much grace and security! You will both know when she’s ready for her first sleepover; it may be next weekend, or in another year or two. But either way, enjoy her while she’s young!

Megan on

Lisa, clearly you are not a parent yourself and seem to be the real brat (and idiot) here. Apparently, you have little more to do w/ your time than to have fun getting a rise out of people w/ your dumba** comments.

I am surprised by the others though that are parents and passing judgement rather harshly on the parenting style of this family. Seriously, since I became a parent the one thing I learned very quickly was not to be critical or judgemental of other parenting styles. There is no one size fits all approach to parenting and raising childen. Just b/c Elisabeth’s daughter was not emotionally ready for a sleep over does not mean she will be terror @ 13, 16 or 30yrs people! Get a grip and step down from your pedestal:-)

Heather on

So many of these comments are “The way I do things is right, and I will openly judge those who do things differently.” Elisabeth Rohm talks about what WORKS FOR HER, so we should all take a page out of her book and realize different things work for different people. Your choices aren’t inherently superior because they’re yours. STOP JUDGING!
Ugh and that nasty woman judging another for having kids later- why on earth would you care when someone else has kids?? That is such an odd thing for you to think is your business. Yeesh.

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