Melissa Joan Hart: Parenting from Both Coasts ‘Stressful’

Bryan Bedder/Getty

Melissa Joan Hart‘s bicoastal lifestyle isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

“It’s kind of stressful,” the actress told PEOPLE Monday at the 38th Annual International Emmy Awards.

“I just had the last six weeks off and I got to be home [in Connecticut]. Now I’m going to go back to the West coast for the next five months [to film Melissa & Joey]. My kids are in school so they have to be here — it is really hard.”

Although she finds the separation difficult, Hart is able to keep her head up, always making sure to never go longer than a week without seeing her sons Mason Walter, 4½, and Braydon ‘Brady’ Hart, 2½.

“We’re just taking it a month at a time. I see them every other week,” the Melissa & Joey star, 34, says. “It’s difficult but at least I can also focus on work and then go home and be a mom.”

Another difficulty Hart has come across? Potty training!

“It’s been really hard. Today I had to leave the gym because Brady pooped his pants,” Hart said. “I couldn’t quite get him on the potty in time. It’s tough but that’s the messy stuff you deal with!”

– Isley Kasica

Comments

urbanadventurertales on November 26th, 2010

Um, no offense, but her children are 2 and 4 years old. There’s no reason she needs to keep them in a certain school at that age! If they were high school or even middle school age, I could understand. But to be away from them for even a week at a time with that excuse is crazy.

Lizz on November 26th, 2010

@PP

That is exactly what I was thinking

hayley w on November 26th, 2010

I think keeping kids grounded in one place is a good thing, they make friends and their whole family might live there.

People do what they have to, to keep roofs over heads and food on tables let not judge too harshly, she i s doing her best and thats all any one can ask.

mom of 2 on November 26th, 2010

my kids are 2 and 4 …..its much more important for them to build a relationship with MOM then their school !!!!! Maybe 2 young ones overwhelm her and she needs an out …..

Jamie on November 26th, 2010

Seeing your children “every other week” is not parenting. Totally agree that at 2 and 4 they do NOT have to stay in a particular school. This just makes me sad…

dana on November 26th, 2010

leave the gym!!!??? ……..i can’t even get to a gym with my 2 toddlers!!

karebear on November 26th, 2010

Since shes complaining she should quit the show.

Stefanie on November 26th, 2010

I completely agree with all of you. I understand you do what you have to, to pay the bills, but she can take the boys with her. Even hire a tutor. They are too young to be without thier mother. I want to cry leaving my baby girl 3 days a week when I work 30 minutes away, nevermind going a week across the country.

Sunny on November 26th, 2010

Oh please – your kids are babies- one isn’t even potty trained – they don’t have to be in school. Hire a nanny and take them with you.

Amy on November 26th, 2010

Um no offense, but i guess you ladies must be perfect mothers to judge someone you dont even know. what full-time working mom wouldnt give the chance to work only part of a year and then have 7 whole months to spend with her kids?!

Romy on November 26th, 2010

whoa, I agree with most that this seems ridiculous. She probably figures her show won’t last long so doesn’t want to uproot them for nothing though. Still, if she wanted to continue with this kind of career I don’t see why they’d live in Connecticut. My kids are too much a part of my every day life, and I would not do well with this. How would a 2 and 4yo feel about this I wonder?

Jennifer on November 26th, 2010

Wow, I just lost any respect I had for her. 2 and 4? Really? They HAVE to be in school? Apparently being a mother isn’t her priority. There is no excuse for that!

Shawna on November 26th, 2010

I agree with all the other posters. They are 2 and 4, they aren’t even in real school yet. There is no reason whatsoever for a mother to abandon her children like that when she has the financial resources to bring them with her and hire a nanny. I honestly don’t know how a mother could do something like that unless she absolutely had to. Major parenting fail Melissa.

Mira on November 26th, 2010

Sunny’s right, Melissa should take the kids to LA if she wants to be on that show so badly. Why is her family living in CT anyway if she’s the breadwinner and her jobs are in LA?

Grace on November 26th, 2010

Hart used to live near me in Sherman Oaks, I even went to her garage sale when she cleaned out the place…about 1-yr ago.

At the time she said it had to do with Dad and his music career, that the move was for his benefit.

Her children are adorable, but really shouldn’t a 2-yr old be fully potty trained or was she just not paying enough attention and he pooped his pants? If he is still in pullup/diapers why didn’t she have a change of clothing with her?

She seems self centered here, and knowing her from the neighborhood I can say that is not so…BUT (there comes the but) people change and perhaps there is more to the separation than meets the eye. WHY can’t Dad take care of the children? WHY can’t Dad travel with her? Is his music career that fantastic that he is on the road? What happened to co-parenting or whatever the politically correct term is these days.

missy on November 26th, 2010

If I remember correctly, Melissa moved her family to CT, so that she could take care of her sick mother. However, if she’s going to be in L.A. most of the time, then what’s the point. I think it would be better for her boys to go to school in L.A. and then go back to visit her mother during breaks. But it’s her family, and I’m sure she’s doing what she thinks is best.

Susan on November 26th, 2010

I believe she is in Connecticut because her mother is there and she has cancer so Melissa and her husband moved their children there to be closer to her mom during this time.

Jess on November 26th, 2010

Wow… .some of you are really harsh! If the same situation applied to the father, none of you would act like this. Yes, it is hard to leave your kids, but her job is what puts food on the table and a roof over their heads. Besides, you have no idea how her family dynamic works. Walk a mile in her shoes before you rip her apart!

Tabitha on November 26th, 2010

Wow, people are judgemental. Does anyone realize that having a child in school at that age is better for them. Other countries start their children in school at 3 years old. Hmm and we wonder why other countries kids excel in school more than ours do. I’ve had my daughter in school since she was 2, and she is now in the 1st grade excelling and ahead of her class. So having your child in school and not up rooting them is a good thing. Instead of judging her look at your own lives and whats going on in them.

Grace on November 26th, 2010

From Westport, Conn patch newsletter

Westport Patch

Her most important and challenging role, however, began just four years ago when she became a mom. Hart says that she and her husband, musician Mark Wilkerson, wanted to find the right community to put down roots and build their family – and they feel that have found their perfect home in Westport.

“My husband and I had made a pact that we would move from Los Angeles before our older son started kindergarten,” Hart explained. “We did a search of the country right before we had our second baby. We made a list of cities and states that we liked; Nashville, Long Island, Connecticut – we have a friend in Darien. We struck out in Nashville, my husband liked it, but I didn’t. I grew up in Long Island and I thought it would be hard to go back. We started losing faith. Then we came to Westport and we fell madly in love. We couldn’t wait to sell our house in L.A. and move. We found a house that we fell in love with and finally sold our house in L.A., luckily, before anyone else made an offer on the house in Westport.”

Kelly on November 26th, 2010

Unfortunately, most of the mothers on here are reinforcing my belief that there is a large percentage of mom’s that are judgemental and hypocritical. I have friends who have quit TODDLER and PRESCHOOL groups because the viciousness of the mothers there. You do not know what anyone is going thru besides yourself.

Most of you on here should be very ashamed of yourselves, and it really makes me sad that you are likely passing these horrible traits on to your innocent children probably won’t know any better until it is too late.

db on November 26th, 2010

i just hope the son doesn’t become famous , mom telling everyone he pooped his pants might come back to haunt him … TMI

Rebecca Jayne on November 26th, 2010

I’m sorry, but if it were the Dad that had a high-paying job that required he travel a lot (for only part of the year!), so that his kids could have a nice home in a good, non-Hollywood environment, and go to school with normal kids, you guys would be singing his praises.

I would never uproot my young children and move them to a big city for only a few months, especially if I had to work the whole time we were there. You guys look for any opportunity to tear these woman down. Parenting is full of hard choices, and clearly she is trying to do the best for her kids.

Heather on November 26th, 2010

I’ m sure all of you who are making negative comments about her parenting are perfect right???? Please! People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. Leave the girl alone, this is how her and her husband decided to raise these kids. Its their kids and their lives.

Heather on November 26th, 2010

Well said Kelly.

RC on November 26th, 2010

“Oooh, moms are so judgmental.” But isn’t that statement a judgment? oooh, so judgy!

Melissa Joan Hart? I am not a big movie/TV person but I don’t remember anything she’s been in in the last decade. Maybe it’s time to consider another career that’s closer to home, or ***GASP*** just focus on your kids?

Jana H. on November 26th, 2010

If you are stressed just imagine how your kids must feel!

Tee on November 26th, 2010

I’m not sure what to think about this article. I have never had a bad thing to say about Melissa Joan Hart but some of the things she said here confuse me. I, too, can’t imagine leaving such young children so often and I don’t understand why she feels they need to be in school at two and four more than they need to be with their Mom. I feel bad for her though… it’s not easy leaving your children!

Marsha on November 26th, 2010

As the mother of a 4 year old daughter, I couldn’t imagine not seeing her every day, putting her to bed every night. But, that is the type of mother I am. Melissa is a different type of mother. That isn’t necessarily bad. Her boys may be adjusting just fine with the schedule.

Personally, I could never do it but, I am not an actress. In an industry that values youth and looks above everything (yes, even talent), she most likely is getting in all that she can so she can be more available for her children later and the acting projects diminish a bit.

Besides, maybe daddy is working out of the home with a home studio or something and he is the primary parent. At least we aren’t reading about Melissa having some kind of breakdown and locking herself in a bathroom at her house while paramedics try to get her out. Give it time to see how the boys do before you judge her parenting style.

JM on November 26th, 2010

i don’t care if it’s a mum or dad saying this, (although i do recognise that many people would react differently if this was a father), if you have their kind of money i don’t really see why you have to be away from your kids for so long. i mean, i have nothing against working mothers, it’s great, often necessary, but in her case it just isn’t.

not to mention, have i missed something but why doesn’t her family just live in LA?

JJ on November 26th, 2010

I agree. They are in preschool/day care. Take them out of that & take them with you!! School at that age is just time off for mommy. Grow up girl & take your kids with you.

Also. I watched the first few shows of Melissa & Joey series. For it to be on the Family Channel/Disney there was way too much sexual innuendos for me & I’m 58 years old. I was glad to see her back on the air in a new series & DVR’d it. After 3 shows, I changed/deleted the automatic recording of it. Defiantly didn’t want my grandkids to watch the show.

Anonymous on November 26th, 2010

Easier to judge when your walking in different shoes.

Leisa on November 26th, 2010

WOW! Talk about some serious Mom Bullies!

Right on Kelly,I totally agree with you.

Sheesh, what is this world coming to when we as mothers judge other mothers so harshly? I had NO idea there were so many perfect mothers out there. “…cast the first stone”

Jennifer on November 26th, 2010

Gosh you people are judgemental and mean. And experts on parenting as well, must be nice!

e on November 26th, 2010

There are a lot of things I would do before leaving my little kids for so many days at a time, on any kind of regular basis like this. This family is in no position that they are desperately doing the only thing they can to “keep food on the table and a roof over their heads”. There are many, many other options if this woman really wanted to be there with her kids.

M A Janssen on November 26th, 2010

I agree with Kelly. MJHart gave a short interview with no other details about her life & you guys are all crucifixing her for the littlest things. If she wants to put her kids in school in spite of their ages, let her. It’s her kids, her life & ultimately, she’s the one who’s going to have to answer to them, not the whole lot of you here.

Kelly is right – mothers are meanest creatures just coz we think we’re entitled to judge solely on the fact that we’re mothers. This is also why women will never rule the world – unless she was Paris Hilton flashing her c*** to the world, we should actually be sending out best wishes to her – her mother is battling cancer so I’m sure she’s trying her best. Besides, urbanadventurertales is right – she could be jobless tomorrow so at least she’ll have some savings from the show she’s doing now – she does have 2 mouths to feed.

I was raised by a SAHM whom I wished had gone out to work. We’re fine now but the damage is done – I’m pretty screwed up and a big part of it is her fault but I know she tried her best in her own way whilst my BFF had a working mother & she turned out great, better than me. People compare those 2 scenarios all the time but no one really knows why one person turns out fine despite having none of the ‘necessary’ requirements & why the other doesn’t. No one knows what goes on behind closed doors but those behind it so quit judging people. Have some compassion – the world could do with more of that.

robinepowell on November 26th, 2010

Well Melissa should have either stayed on the West Coast, or not do the TV show, unless they agree to do it on the East Coast. Same goes for her shop. She opened it in California and then moves to CT.

Eventually something’s going to have to give. I know her family lives on the East Coast, but she knew that when she chose to move to other end of the States.

Anonymous on November 26th, 2010

If I’m not happy, then the kids are not going to be happy. That’s the kind of parent I’m going to be. What’s so bad about putting yourself ahead of the kids? Just because you become a parent that doesn’t mean you stop being human. I’ll be probably be getting slammed for it but oh well.

Besides, at least she’s working. There’s some parents living off from social security and just popping kids out. Why is it that the dad can travel/work away from home for a long period of time but it’s not ok for the mom?

Dee on November 26th, 2010

Maybe you don’t realize Melissa has family on Long Island, and as such, she as well as her children get to spend time with her family. Also, it does add stability not to be going hither and thither, living out of a suitcase. I think she’s wonderful for trying to give her family as normal a life as she can. Kudos!

Victoria on November 26th, 2010

Wow! All of you are so judgmental about what it takes to make her family work for her. For the record, I was in school by the time I was 3 and it was all day fully equipped with report cards and the lot. Maybe her and her husband decided that leaving the kids in one place instead of uprooting them (such as the Jolie-Pitts) wouldn’t be the best situation for them. Just like what she’s doing may not be the best thing for all of the other moms out there.

I’m sure her children are happy, well adjusted little men. Otherwise, I don’t think she would be comfy enough to leave them. Cut her some slack, geez! But, I forgot. All of the mom’s who are criticizing her are the most perfect moms in the world, who have perfect children, and their way is the best way. You guys need to get off your high horses.

K on November 26th, 2010

Oh I love it when the “sanctimommies” come out! The moms who believe that their way is the ONLY way. MJH is doing what she feels is best for her family, but acknowledging that there are drawbacks to her decision…as we all do. Not every mom feels the urge or desire to be with their kids 24/7 or to give up their lives or careers to raise children and that is okay.

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt take their kids everywhere and I see the same people complaining that the kids don’t have “roots” and are being raised by nannies … make up your mind! Her children are part of a community and she chooses to not make them travel across the country. I am sure they are well taken care of by their other parent and he does just as good of a job and she could. Get over it.

BTW, I am a stay-at-home mom and not be choice, I have a disabled husband who requires me being at home. Given my choice I would also work and given that my degree is in policy analysis, I would be working long hours. Does this make me any less of a mother? NO! I love my kids and do and would spend as much time as possible with them, but I also enjoy my career and want to go back to it. Having children does not mean that you lose yourself and if you do you will be miserable when they are grown.

KS on November 26th, 2010

Everyone is such an expert! Give her a break – no one but her and her husband are privy to the entire story. Glad to know there are so many perfect parents out there!

sks on November 26th, 2010

People should not be so fast to judge. yes, she spends time away from her children but it is only for a few months a year and during that time she does see them, it isn’t like she has disappeared, plus I am sure she talks to them daily probably via a video chat.

Also why judge for her trying to create a stable life for her children outside of LA and for wanting them to begin their education at an early age, do i think they could move schools of course but I am not their parent and I think it is great that they aren’t in LA. And for those of you who say the kids just being in school is so the mom can have time off must not be sending your children to the right learning center, many are structured and teach children that small lots of things especially socialization which is a huge part of our lives.

Finally to the one woman who criticized her for not having her 2 year old potty trained you are CRAZY!! Two is not too old to not be potty trained I know very few people whose children were fully potty trained at 2, if you have children that were fully potty trained at 2 congrats to you but my son isn’t and he is 28 months and that does NOT make me a bad mom in fact he has only gone in the toilet 5 times but we are trying.

april on November 26th, 2010

wow. I don’t even have children, and I’m already dreading the day that another mother should pass judgment on the way I choose to parent a child.

sounds like all the negative nancys of the world should take a lesson in etiquette.

Bancie1031 on November 26th, 2010

I like Melissa Joan Hart …. always have …. and I love her show Melissa and Joey ….

While I personally couldn’t go that long without seeing my child I applaud her for keeping her kids in a structured sturdy grounded environment.

Now I didn’t read ALL of the comments on here because I got to angry! A BUNCH OF YOU ARE HYPOCRITES! Now if she followed your advice and took her kids with her instead of putting Mason in school or she hired a nanny or a private tutor to help her so she could take her kids with her then it would be they need a steady, structure and rooted life NOT to mention then she would be a bad mom for not wanting what’s best for her kids instead of her being selfish wanting her kids with her all the time. Yes 4 year olds NEED PRE-K! Studies have proven that starting kids in school at an early age helps them to excel because their minds are like sponges.

Grace – NO not all kids are potty trained by 2 years old …… He’s 2 not 8! And even when they are fully potty trained they can still have accidents, nothing wrong with that ……

I remember an article where Reese Witherspoon said that She and Ryan agreed when she was pregnant with Ava that they would never work at the same time so one of them was always home with their children so someone else wasn’t raising their kids ….. And if I remember correctly everyone was praising Reese and Ryan saying things like they are putting their kids needs first; it’s a great thing that one parent is always home with them giving them a chance to have roots and a stable life; etc ….. Now I really don’t see a difference of what Melissa is doing then what Reese and Ryan did ….. Think about it …. While filming a movie Reese, Ryan or any other actor/actress is gone to location for anywhere between 1 and 5 months …… And look at how many movies some of the actors/actresses make that are parents ….. please someone explain to me what is the difference …. there isn’t any difference.

Plus she sees them every other week just like a lot of parents do especially where a divorce is involved. ALSO kids are home with DAD not a nanny or someone else to raise/take care of them.

Bancie1031 on November 26th, 2010

sks – I AGREE and might I add VERY NICELY SAID!!!!!!!!!

Debi on November 26th, 2010

Children are such an incredible gift from God! It saddens me to think about those 2 very young boys not being with their Mom and Dad consistently.I agree that school is not the priority at ages 2 & 4, but being with Mom should be!

When a person decides to have children they should be ready to be a fully committed parent or they should wait until they can be one! Children grow up in a blink and you can never turn back the clock. I Hope that she rethinks her priorities and at least brings her children with her.

Lynn on November 26th, 2010

My kids are also 2 and 4. Other than my 4 year old being in preschool two mornings a week they’re both home with me full-time.

Melissa-I’m sorry you’re receiving lots of judgement. I just want to say that if you’re really stressed out perhaps you can hire a nanny and take your kids with you. I’ve noticed what my 2 year old needs is to tear up a playground and my 4 year old needs playdates. Perhaps you can home school them. Don’t worry…they’ll develop their social skills. Good luck!

sullyjo on November 26th, 2010

I think that if I had the ability to work 3 or 4 months out of the year and make a decent enough living that i didn’t have to work the next 7-8 months, I would do it, too…and she probably wants her boys to have stability which is why they aren’t with her….in a perfect world, she probably would be there but she’s an ACTRESS! and we live in a fickle world where you are” in” one day and “out” the next and she is taking advantage of her being “in” while she can….and earning a living to give those little boys some opportunity….i would do it if I were in her shoes….

and for the poster who said something about a two year old not being potty trained and should be–you must be a super mom–been trying to potty train my daughter for almost a year (she’s 2 1/2) and she is not having it–wants to sit on the potty but will not go and will not pee if i have the diaper off…but i guess that means i’m a horrible mom if she’s not potty trained yet–oh wait, my daughter and husband think i’m a great mom–their opinion is good enough for me….

Morgan on November 26th, 2010

Some of you are being way too harsh. Those of you who do not have kids should not be criticizing when it comes to parenting issues.

My son got accepted to a preschool when he was 2 years old, and the best part about it is that it was only two days per week. I’m a full-time stay at home mother as well. So, do I think it is wrong to send your child to school at a young age? Absolutely not! I wanted my child to have that social life with other kids his age and have the best education possible. I am a loving mother and will do anything in my power to guide my child through life, but I would want my child to have that independence when he gets older. Melissa is a working mother and she obviously has to provide for her family financially, emotionally and physically to be happy. Some of you are hypocrites!

For the one who said something about potty training comment. You are crazy! My son was fully potty trained shortly after he turned 3. He never wanted to use it or he was too scared to. You can’t force your kids to do anything or they will never want to learn. You have to make it look fun if they want to become interested is being a “big” boy/girl.

Melissa on November 26th, 2010

I love Melissa and Joey, its a really funny sitcom and we need good ones out there today with all those stupid reality shows… I think she is doing what she can to put a roof over her kids heads and she is a great mom.. Keep up the good work and I will continue watchin Melissa and Joey… Love it….

Tracey on November 26th, 2010

Through out all of this, where is Mark? why isn’t he helping out? you would think he would contribute.

Erika on November 26th, 2010

Okay, no offense to anyone in particular, but I didn’t realize that having a kid (or kids) made you an expert in parenting all children. Just because you have a family doesn’t mean that you know what’s best for every family and maybe it is a priority for her kids to be in school at a young age. I personally wouldn’t do it for my (future) children buts just my preference. The kids are not neglected and they are well taken care of. Maybe you wouldn’t leave for long periods of time but that doesn’t mean she can’t. There really is no reason to judge. Every family is different and that is what makes the world diverse.

Janet on November 26th, 2010

I think its sound crazy too, i love hers & joeys new show but its crazy
theses kids cant be with her?

Laura on November 26th, 2010

Wow! I couldn’t even finish reading all the negative comments that are being spewed by the readers. Who are all of you to judge her for what she and her husband have decided is the best course for their family? Is it what I would do? Probably not, but that’s me and my choice. The thing that works for one family is not what works for every family. It’s not even what’s right for a family from child to child.

Maybe some day she will look back and think that she didn’t make the best choice. But maybe, just maybe, this provides the cushion to send the kids to the colleges of their choice. There is no way she is some multi-millionaire. She may be comfortable or she may be struggling, not one of us knows what her situation is right now.

So to you ladies who have color-coordinated your activity calendars, set all your play-dates, finished your holiday shopping and are mailing out your pre-printed holiday cards as you sit in your perfectly decorated mausoleum wearing your little matched sweater sets, give the woman a break. This is her life and she’s not asking for sympathy from anyone. She just commented on the craziness of her life!

Elizabeth on November 26th, 2010

Wow. I´m glad I´m not eligible to be in People. Judgement in 7 paragraphs. Grow up people, there´s more here than meets the eye. How would your lives look in 7 paragraphs?

Rose on November 26th, 2010

Wow all of you people on here who are lecturing those who disagree with Melissa’s parenting approach are a bunch of hypocrites. Do you have any idea how judgmental you sound as well – or what enormous hypocrites you are for lecturing others for being too judgemetnal while also judging those who you think are mean and judgemental.

I find it endlessly hilarious that the people on this site who lecture others so much about not being nice enough always end up coming across as the meanest and most judgemental of all. It’s kind of sad that you can’t seem to climb down off your self-appointed pedastals long enough to realize that you’re not as nice as you’re pretending to be. You’re just a bunch of people who can’t handle that other people are not obligated to gush about celebrities and pretend they’re perfect the way you seem to want to.

Carrie on November 26th, 2010

All I know is that I had trouble leaving my kids at that age for a day of skiing. I missed them so much I couldn’t stand it… I just don’t get this at all. Sad.

Sage on November 26th, 2010

I love MJH so much! First her show is one of the HIGEST rated new shows of the year FYI.

Second we don’t know their family situation. Also if you add all the time off she has, she probably spends more time with her children then some of you “great mother’s” out there.

Third: You know the children have a father right? But we as a society don’t expect men to take care of their children… so the point is void.

Susie on November 26th, 2010

People shouldn’t judge others. Being an actor is a totally different set of circumstances. You go where the work is. Give her a break.

LA is no place to raise children. Maybe dad is home full time? All you Nancy’s out there are so quick to judge – you have no idea what her circumstances are.

Ever think of supporting your fellow mom’s instead of trashing their choices? Shame on you all. I bet you talk about your bestfriend behind her back.

Jessica in Canada on November 26th, 2010

I’m not trying to judge her parenting, but I think it’s sad that she thinks her babies “have” to be in school. Is she caving to society’s pressures when she really misses them and wants to be with them? There are other options. Even children who are actually school age don’t have to be in school. Children can learn in other environments besides school. Personally I think it would be a great opportunity for the family to live on a different coast for a few months a year before the reality of “real” school begins.

Perhaps she really likes routine & consistency. And that is fine for her.

But for me, my young children belong with me & my husband and learn best from us. The jobs we have chosen conflict with the school schedule, so we homeschool. We have great opportunities to travel and thus have more family time. Our family comes before school, and if our job started to interfere, we would find a different job.

cricket on November 27th, 2010

I agree with an earlier poster…if I could work for 5 months and be off for 7, I’d do whatever it takes to make it work. Nothing irks me more than a holier than thou mother! Is Katie Holmes a better mother because she carries her kid around even though her feet drag the ground and she doesn’t say no to her kid? I’m sure Melissa’s boys are doing great with their father.

JR on November 27th, 2010

My Mom worked in the same Industry, and took all 6 of her children with her on the road- as babies and well into grammar school. We brought assignments from our teachers, but had quality time with our parents, and wonderful life experiences that most children don’t get. As we got older, school/social life was more demanding, and we went less frequently, but we always had the option.

Melissa is a loving mother, I’m sure, but perhaps doesn’t realize that this do-able as a working mom. She can afford a nanny to help when she’s actually working, but in her down time, she can be a very hands-on parent. And her children are still young enough that school itself is not an issue. Just a thought- I wish her and her family well.

Betsy on November 27th, 2010

I agree with all those that say you are passing judgement and you all must be perfect. As I was reading the comments, the one thing that came to mind was that I agreed with each of you that said this is her life and she is doing what she thinks is best. NO one is perfect!

Also, I was surprised that I didn’t read any comment about the military. How many men and women serve our country and go months or even years at a time without their children. I know acting isn’t the same as serving our country, but would you judge them as harshly for not being there for their kids???

I love MJH and I think she is doing a great job, those kids aren’t in the “LA Life” and are able to live normal lives with family surrounding them. That is the best thing they could have!!

Manda on November 27th, 2010

All I have to say poor little rich girl!!! I’m Active Duty Air Force mother of 3 beautiful boys. Try parenting from across the world and my husband being deployed at the same time. And my boys are at our mother house. And we are parenting through Skype. There are a whole lot of women who are just one parent and raising more than on child hoping to have money for food and bills. I think people are feeling sorry for the wrong person. Feel the the single parent or someone who really needs the help…

Tee on November 27th, 2010

Wow, hang on a second, people. Not every comment that wasn’t completely positive is judgemental. All I said was that I didn’t understand some of the choices Melissa made for herself. I went on to say that I felt sorry for her because it must be hard to leave her children so often. So please don’t lump all the comments that aren’t fawning over her together into one catagory!

lisa on November 27th, 2010

There are plenty of parents who unwillingly leave their children behind everyday for months at a time, if not a year or longer…they are part of the military. As a Navy brat myself, my dad would be gone for 6 months at a time, but I had stability of my mom. More recently you hear of moms being in the military and the father staying at home. My brother is in the Army, his last tour of Iraq he was gone for 16 months and home for 2 weeks about halfway through. MJH is home every other week!!

With the all the benefits we have with technology: Skype, internet phones, etc. Not to mention she is still in the US and can be home within a very reasonable amount of time compared to some peoples commutes to and from work

C on November 27th, 2010

I commend her for doing her best by working and being a mother to her two children.

Sadly, some people don’t know how it is to juggle work and other things in their life. There are mothers out there who juggle work and school while being a mother. It’s not an easy task but some do it to make their lives better.

IF MJH, decided traveling back and forth between CT and L.A. than that’s her choice, don’t hang her for what she’s doing. Commend her for still being mother while working hard.

dennis on November 27th, 2010

I can’t stand these women that whine about juggling job and kids…If you can’t manage…don’t have any kids!..Few of these celebrities have normal kids anyway!

ShyAsrai on November 27th, 2010

since we’re not discussing toddlers left all alone in a crackhouse without loving adults or loving care, it’ll be those anxious people who ‘inform’ the kids they are being neglected or abused that will cause the kids to feel that way.

Robin on November 27th, 2010

That is Day Care not School. Parent your Children, while you work. That is what the rest of us mothers do.

Karyn on November 27th, 2010

I am SURE she weighed the pros and cons – and it can not be easy for her to leave. HOWEVER – if working 3 months away from my kids then afforded me to be with them for SEVEN months without working, I would do it. It would suck, but I would do it.

They are at home with their dad – and I personally believe that is better than being with her. Actors work 12-15 hour days. She would never see the kids. They would be on set with a nanny. I don’t judge her at all. EVERY mom does what is best for HER situation.

Helen on November 27th, 2010

At ages 2 and 4 it’s not really school. Let’s call it what it really is DAYCARE. I think she could find another daycare on the west coast while she films her show.

Ava on November 27th, 2010

As a parent of a 4 & 6 yr old I can tell you that at 2 & 4 it’s daycare not school. Of course, parents call it ‘school’ to make themselves feel better. If she wanted them with her then hire a nanny and take them with her…if not then deal with it like others do. I feel for her on the potty training though…every child does it at their own pace and when they’re ready

Jazz on November 27th, 2010

I know work in entertainment is often unpredictable, but why make the recent move to the east coast and then take a job in her old hometown on the west coast? Everyone makes choices and it was hers to move out of L.A. If she feels the need to go back to work, which many of us moms do, then she should find work closer to her family…or just go to work and stop complaining. All moms work hard and all realize at one point that kids are only young once. She’ll have plenty of free time to think about that during her uninterrupted gym workouts.

Monica on November 27th, 2010

None of us know what her financial situation is, nor should we it’s none of our business. I am only saying this because most people agree that she could afford to hire a nanny and bring the kids with her or seem to be implying that she’s only working because she wants to.

How many of us were floored to read Mark McGrath’s blog about how he was only able to afford one round of IVF and then worried about paying for the twins when they were born? We seem to think that all “celebrities” are hugely rich when we really don’t know.

Let’s leave MJH alone. She had made the choice she feels is best for her family- period. I’m a stay a home mom and let me tell you there are several times a day that I would kill to fly across the country too. Doesn’t make me a bad mom, just means I’m human.

Leigh on November 27th, 2010

I would never pack up my young children and drag them back and forth across the country. Yes, they may only be 4 and 2, but at 4 years old you start forming memories that actually last. Imagine how stressful it would be never being settled in one place long enough to really get used to your surroundings. A lot of people comment and judge other celebrities who do drag their kids around. Nothing is ever the right decision it seems. It actually is important to have children in preschool because it helps them later in life. I think instead of critisizing Melissa for her choices, you should realize some people would critisize yours for not putting your little ones in preschool and giving them that opportunity to gain those extra mental and physical skills. Those of you who think you know what is best, step off your crazy pedistal. No one here knows why she made the decision. I highly doubt you’re all the most perfect people in the world.

NNHARRIS on November 27th, 2010

WOW….IS SHE SERIOUS????? Melissa Joan Hart has officially gone all ‘Hollywood’. 2 and 4 …….This is why such a large percentage of celebrity children are so screwed up…..can’t be mad at the child’s theatrics when the Mom & Dad never parented them! Poor boys…..

Michelle on November 27th, 2010

Oh, you people are never happy! When Brad and Angelina pack up all their children and move around the globe you complain that “the children need stability!! They need to settle in one place!! How will they make friends outside their siblings?”

And here we have a mom who has decided that her sons should stay in one place, attend one school, and not travel around and she gets skewered for it.

NNHARRIS on November 27th, 2010

what about home schooling….isn’t that one of the perks of making that kind of money? cheaper than what she’s paying for private school i’m sure….Sorry, I still don’t get how being away five months from your 2 and 4 year old is ever okay (every other wknd when they’re that young is detrimental in the formative years).

andrea on November 27th, 2010

Ummm kids start school at the age of 5 or 6…. Why would she want to give up raising her kids for her career? She could make money many other ways (commercials, exc.) than being gone for months at a time. I couldn’t imagine choosing this for my kids. Take them with you, so many kids live on two coasts, especially at a young age, MOM AND DAD are more important than making glue dots at daycare?1!!!!

andrea on November 27th, 2010

I understand wanting your kids to be in one place. But you are supposed to be there WITH THEM!!!!!

acorr on November 27th, 2010

I haven’t noticed if anyone commented on the fact that maybe they are home with their father. A father is perfectly capable to raise the children while the mother is working…

Renee on November 27th, 2010

I actually didn’t understand why she would move out of California if she was still planning on working a lot in the first place. Because she did used to live there. Why not just keep the family all together and move away when you don’t want to work that much anymore? doesn’t make sense to me. That way her family would be together all the time. She could have made it much easier on herself and her kids if she wanted to.

Maddie on November 27th, 2010

Although the boys are probably at home with their dad (who is more than capable of raising them of course), 5 months is a long time to go without seeing your children (and for them to not see their mom). Particularly when they are this young, and it is a big chunk of time out of their lives. But like I said, I’m sure they are surrounded by extended family and their wonderful dad – but as others have mentioned, they are in preschool its not like they have to be there, they could take extended leave from it, but then there is the issue of resettling etc. At the end of the day, you have to make money to support your family, maybe this was the best solution for everyone involved, who knows. Hopefully they are Skyping lots

Laura on November 27th, 2010

This mom is insane, leaves her little boys continually for a week.. I am sure she could afford less working now when they are so small or take them with her!! She is causing some major traumas for the little boys this way, that is for sure. Mom is always mom, the most important person for a little child.

Jamie on November 28th, 2010

Completely agree with Tabitha, Victoria and K. I’m appalled at how many judgmental, mean-spirited mothers there are out there from the comments on this site alone. Get off your high horses and stop attacking MJH for raising her family and her kids the way SHE sees fit and in the way that works best for HER. It may not be what you would have chosen, but guess what. It’s not YOUR life and nobody’s asking you to do the same thing, so come off it.

I was in school by the time I was 3 years old – full-day preschool with report cards, parent-teacher conferences, progress reports, etc. And, I’ll tell you something. I think I turned out much better than I would have otherwise. Also, as a teacher, I’ve SEEN the evidence first-hand that having kids in school at that age IS important. Stability is imperative at that age when they’re soaking up information and formulating friendships, rather than consistently uprooting your kids every so many months because of your job. All of you casting stones must be perfect mothers. How nice for you, but not everyone can be that way. So, give MJH a break and focus on your own kids instead of attacking someone else for how they raise their family just because they’re ‘rich.’

sks on November 28th, 2010

As a teacher I would like to say that sending you child to kindergarten at age 5 or 6 without any schooling before that age can be a big mistake. Preschool and kindergarten are not what they used to be, it is not about nap time and coloring, it is about letters, colors, shapes, counting, adding, spelling and so much more. Most kindergartens are 5 days a week all day long so if your child has no type of structured education before that it can really be a shock for child and parents.

I am not saying that it is crucial for a 2 year old to be in school but I think that for a 4 year old it is huge and if you can start your child in school in the state you plan on them attending you will be setting your child up to be much more successful. On a final note on education there are many daycare centers/ preschools that are all about naps and coloring and games and the workers that they like to call “teachers” are 16-20 years old but then there are also valuable early childhood education centers that have teachers that are 4 year college educated teachers to educate the children.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion but remember that you don’t have the whole story and these are not your kids so really they are not your concern. Some parents let their 2 and 4 yeear olds have pop which I firmly disagree with but that doesn’t mean I am going to judge them as a parent it just means I wouldn’t do it the same.

One final thing I am pretty sure those parents are doing what they need to do to provide that celebrities aren’t the only ones who have jobs that require them to be away. there are a number of white color and blue color jobs that take parents out of the home and out of the state but that is what they need to do to provide for their family. I don’t know if MJH is good mom or not because I don’t know her and neither do you so why judge.

Oh and being potty trained at 2 LOL I wish!!!

kirsty on November 28th, 2010

I have no problem with her kids being in school, my daughter goes to preschool twice a week and loves it. What I do have a problem with is leaving your small children for that long, I would have a hard time leaving my daughter for weeks even if it only is 5 months a year. this is a different situation than a military family because she has the ability to be with them in California, and they could be in school. She could live outside LA and just have a longer commute to work, she chose to live far away from her children when she didn’t have to.

Jamie on November 28th, 2010

Melissa moved her family to Connecticut, because her mother is suffering from cancer and she’s taking care of her. I would say that’s a valid reason to move.

Sasha on November 28th, 2010

Some of you are twisted. You cast stones at Brad and Angelina for taking their kids with them everywhere and now you’re throwing boulders at MJH for her choices. Make up your minds. How about letting parents raise their children the best way they see fit? Maybe just maybe they know what’s best for their families? Novel concept, I know, but it just might work.

gdfg on November 28th, 2010

Laura, my dad was gone every other week for years when I was a little kid, and I turned out fine! I’m not at all traumatized.

Laura on November 28th, 2010

The issue here is not taking the kids to school, that is fine with me. The issue is that there is no mommy for the kids for days and days in sequel. No mommy giving hugs and breakfast, no mommy hugging and listening your thoughts after the school day, no mommy taking you to playground in the evening, letting you to help preparing the dinner, no mommy reading bedtime stories and kissing you goodnight..

Especially if the mom first was in your life and then leaves you when you are under five years old, that must feel really hard for the CHILD. So many women are here defending Melissa’s right to do what SHE feels is best for HER. What about the little kids??? Don’t they have right to have a mommy present in their lives?? Regardless are they going to school or not!

I understand situations where the mom is not present right from the beginning and the father takes the main(sole) responsibility raising the kids. But when the mom first is there living with the kid under the same roof and then when the kid is at the age of 2/4 moves to live in another place (and still exists).. that is cruel FOR THE KID.

Laura on November 28th, 2010

I see that most of the critizers here are not wondering why the little kids go to school, they are wondering why the family does not arrange things so that the kids would not to live separately from their mother for weeks and weeks, at the age of 2 and 4!?

I am sure that Melissa Joan Hart would have the opportunity to arrange their life so if she would have the will to do so.

In this interview she is only talking how stressful things are for HER – not a word about the little boys’ feelings and their best interest.

Laura on November 28th, 2010

I have two boys having about the same age difference as Melissa has. At that age (2 and 4) life was sometimes full of boys arguing, their tantrums, own will emerging, setting up routines and rules. Maybe the most challenging time for parents! (before the boys being teenagers ).

Somehow I come to think that in this way – externalizing the raising work to school and other people (including nannies?) Melissa has chosen the easiest path for herself.

Dana on November 28th, 2010

I agree. Why keep them in a different city when she’s filming for 5 mos? It doesn’t make sense. My hubby wouldn’t like it if I went away for 2-3 wks for school/work as I did once before we had a 2nd but 5 mos w/ occasional visits it dumb. Besides, the show it pretty cheesy. I each of the actors in previous shows but M&J needs to revamp its character’s lines/personalities or something.

Erin on November 28th, 2010

Wow!!! I have been a follower of this site for a few years now. I have continued to read comments and most of the time ppl are nice but today for the first time I felt compelled to write. I am currently 5 months along with my first child and if how you ppl all act is what I have to look forward to in the future I am TERRIFIED!!! I have never in all my life been so dissappointed in the human kind. Some of the comments and judgements people have had reguarding parenting is disgusting and has litterally made me not want to become a parent!!! For those of you who feel the need to be so critical and so negative shame on you!!! It is ppl like u that take the fun out of everything for everyone else!!! Did ur own parents never teach you anything???? IF YOU HAVE NOTHING NICE TO SAY THEN SAY NOTHING AT ALL!!! NONE of us has any right to judge ANYONE as we will NEVER know every detail of someone elses life!

Tee on November 28th, 2010

Morgan, I’m sorry but I do not agree with you and your statement makes me really angry. You do NOT have to be a parent in order to know how to care for a child and have a mother’s love for a child. I have worked with children for 16 years. I have five nieces that I love and care for all the time. My own sister… their mother… has said that I am their second Mom and that I love them like nobody else. So no, you don’t have to be a mother to know a mother’s love for a child!

Rose on November 28th, 2010

@Erin: You need to get over yourself. We are allowed to have whatever opinion we like. We don’t all have to sugar-coat every opinion we have in order to better accomodate those who can’t handle the fact that not everything other parents say and do is right. Some parents make bad decisions. That’s a sad reality of life and I’m not going to pretend otherwise to accomodate insecure people who want to pretend like parents are infallible. And if you’re so insecure that other people’s opinions make you not want to become a parent then maybe you should spend some time working on your own self-esteem rather than blaming others for your insecurities.

Erin on November 28th, 2010

@ rose My self esteem is just fine thanks!! The issue I have is the amount of negetivity on this page!!! The world is a negative enough place as it is! Don’t you think as human beings we should all stop attacking one another for such petty reasons! If ppl would just learn to treat each other with a little more courtesy and respect it would be nice! I understand that ppl have the right to their opinions,and that is what I was getting at. Everyone has their own way of doing things. No one persons way is the RIGHT way. So maybe the bickering and pettiness on here should stop, as noone is proving anything!! It’s pointless, and cruel. None of us are without faults and I just thought that a few ppl on here are taking things a little too far! That is MY opinion and as you said I have the right to that!

Michelle on November 29th, 2010

I’m kind of concerned with the reading comprehension skills some of you display.

She doesn’t say that she will be away from her boys for 5 months straight. She says she never goes more than a week without seeing them!

They’re probably home with Dad – it’s not like she’s going to leave a big bowl of kibble in the middle of the kitchen floor and the toilet seat up and walk out the door!

sks on November 29th, 2010

@Michelle
Hilarious and so true, I enjoyed your light hearted sarcasm

Nan on December 1st, 2010

It was tough enough separating from my kids for a 3 day weekend less than 15 miles away. Divorce is very hard on everyone and for many years. I don’t know enough about Melissa to know, if that is her current status. Melissa didn’t seem to share anything that mothers & fathers have been dealing with everyday. I wish there had been help for me as a new mother with all the new skills I needed to be a mom. Good luck & happy times to everyone.. parenting 101 success
Nan

Monica on December 1st, 2010

Michelle- LOVE IT!! I almost fell off the couch laughing!! So true…

Nicole on December 12th, 2010

Hello all,

Alright. Here is the story. Her husband hated LA and wanted to raise the kids in a more “country” place. They went all over. And then they found CT. He didn’t want the kids to be all “Hollywood”. Why you have to move all the way across the country, I don’t know.

So, they moved. It has nothing to do with her mother, Paula, in full recovery. She is actually in LA.

Then the Melissa and Joey thing took off and now she has to travel back and forth. Not the greatest idea, when you take into account that DWTS was the same deal. So, her mother is pretty much “weekend” mom type thing. This is no way I would run a marriage. But then again, that’s probably why I am not rich, being that houses in that area of CT run 7 million dollars and up.

Nice houses: Yes

Well adjusted kids: No

Big Paychecks: Yes

Close marriage: No.