Double Take! Willow Smith Sparkles Like Elton John

Simon Earl/Splash News Online; Terry O’Neill/Camera Press/Retna

When in London, do as the Londoners do. At least that’s the thinking behind Willow Smith‘s recent looks.

While visiting the UK with her family — dad Will Smith, mom Jada Pinkett-Smith and big bro Jaden Smith — to promote The Karate Kid this week, the 9½-year-old is taking style cues from all kinds of iconic British entertainers.

On July 16, she stepped out in a punk-inspired outfit (black moto jacket, faded denim shirt, Union Jack leggings and black hi-top Converse sneakers) that would make The Clash proud.

And one day later, she rocked a pair of Elton John-esque sparkle shades (above) to sign photographs for fans.

Tell us: What do you think of Willow’s British-inspired style?

Comments

Molly on July 19th, 2010

I think the kids have looked freaking ridiculous in every picture I’ve seen of them. I’m all for letting kids dress themselves, but I’m not at all a fan of these kids’ taste.

Sadie on July 19th, 2010

The shades – Outrageous and inappropriate for a little girl.

The hair – Even more outrageous and inappropriate for a little girl. Its just plain ridiculous! There is something about giving your child choices but where do you draw the line? She is 9 years old for gosh sakes. Let her be a little girl, nothing about this says, “I’m nine,” but it does say, “I’m a woman and can do what I want, when I want.”

Lastly Willow has fans???? I am perplexed – Just who is looking up to her? Grown women or other little girls?? And what has she done/achieved that she should have fans – a shaved head??

Oh and please I welcome all of you coming down and slamming my name in the mud for having an opinion different from yours. Sorry but I don’t see any of this as right.

Sandra on July 19th, 2010

Sadie, I am not going to come down on you for having a different opinion. But with that said, I don’t understand why the shades are outrageous and inappropriate?!

I do agree with you on the hair, it is a bit too much /but I believe that children do have a right to have an opinion on how they look – and the fact that there still is a lot of hair left is so she can pull to either side so it can look like a full head of hair.

Jen DC on July 19th, 2010

Soooo… Your kids don’t have funny sunglasses? The criticism about the hair I can see. The clothes as well. But the *sunglasses*? Whatever. Most little girls like sparkly things and as far as I can tell, that’s exactly what these are: Sparkly, rhinstoned sunglasses.

As far as the hair is concerned, it’s summer. If my (potential) kids want to have weird hair during their out-of-school days, then that’s fine with me. We’d have to revisit during school in case the school itself has rules/regulations or if it’s deemed disruptive – which I’d have to see for myself before I condemned my kid to some other kind of hairstyle of my choosing.

They’ve drawn the line somewhere to the left of where you’d draw it – obviously. That being said, I’ve never seen her showing a lot of skin or dressed “like a tramp” or in high heeled shoes a la Suri Cruise (which podiatrists say is actually bad for her growing feet). Furthermore, as long as she remained respectful at home and did her chores, I’d be more apt to give a kid of mine more choices in clothing and reading material rather than restricting them.

How my kid *looks* is far less important than how she *acts*. As long as she’s still acting like a kid – and seeing as Willow likes to dress oddly, I’m betting this is kind of an extended dress up for her – then I’m fine with the whole thing. But as soon as it started going to her head and she started acting out, being disrespectful or acting in a way that shamed me, I’d roll it back.

I think, Sadie, that it’s a kind of jealousy with you – not in a bad way. *Your* kids can’t go out looking that way in your community because you’re not a huge movie star and your community wouldn’t respect you or the way you’re raising your child. So be it. There are other, non-famous children who dress wildly/crazily/oddly in other communities who have “artistic” parents (painters, sculptors, what have you) and no one blinks an eye because that’s their milieu. Or maybe some people just have kids who are “out there” and they let them explore that side of themselves. In the way kids dress and style their hair, I fall on the side of letting them get it out of their systems rather than having them attempt to hide things.

As far as autographs, they are not for the purpose of “looking up” to anyone so much as it is about the fame of the person. Like it or not, Willow Smith is part of a now huge, well-known Hollywood family. She’s already had bit parts in two movies. If someone is asking her for her autograph, it says less about her than about the person asking for it.

Dude, take it down a couple of notches and own your opinion without being so freakin’ defensive.

Electra on July 19th, 2010

I dont think the glasses are inappropriate, by themselves they’re fine but on top of her outfit they just add to the outlandishness. I’m a very understate person but I like flamboyancy in other peoples style choices. There just something really irking about this family! As if they pride themselves on having this “look at me, look at me” quality. I mean its not even the imagination of a little girl who came up with this outfit- it’s the work of a stylist. I mean, Mel B’s daughter has a similar style and haircut but I get an entirely different vibe off of her and that family.

Romy on July 19th, 2010

I am already burned out on Willow and Jaden Smith, just like I am tired of their parents.

Chris on July 19th, 2010

Internationally, society should ban child actors. It’s exploitation by parents and media; there are very few who start as child stars and have a decent, productive life. Bring back cartoons, use CG, but let children grow up at home and school like average citizens. Willow’s parents dress and act pretty much the same way she does so that’s all she knows. The media should not be allowed to photograph children at all.

Dana on July 19th, 2010

Sadie, you are sooooo right, I heartily agree with you, definitely!!!!

aj on July 19th, 2010

what’s outlandish about a tank top and jeans? that’s what she’s wearing in that picture. I’m not sure why people are still harping on her hair either, she has a mohawk big deal, so do tons of other kids male & female

Caroline on July 19th, 2010

She looks like a fool. Obviously her parents let her run around looking like this because she did shave her head herself. And her brother looks just as bad. Do they even go to school looking like this? I mean really?

iluvperfectparents on July 19th, 2010

She’s a pretty girl.

CynWhyn on July 19th, 2010

Let the child be a child. In ten yrs the family will be saying “Where did we go wrong”.

Janna on July 19th, 2010

Caroline, you just called a **9-year old girl** a fool.

mae on July 19th, 2010

I’m not a fan of the look and prob wouldn’t allow my kids to dress like this. But I’m not an A list celebrity and my kids don’t regularly walk red carpets. I think in their world (Hollywood) it is fine if she wants to dress this way. She comes from a performance family and I can understand her parents wanting to encourage her personal expression. These are their kids so they can do as they see fit.

B.J. on July 19th, 2010

Homage to Elton, I love it!

Shannon on July 19th, 2010

She looks no weirder than Gwen Stefani’s kids. At least Willow is old enough to dress herself.

KJC on July 19th, 2010

I’m all for letting kids express themselves through their clothing and hair choices – but who are they fooling?!? There is no way Willow chooses her outfits and hairstyles on her own, her parents are all over that for sure.

Obviously growing up as a celebrity child will have had influence on Willow and Jaden, but their parents have to be behind the way those kids dress. Without a doubt.

…and this coming from a Will Smith fan.

Jenn on July 19th, 2010

I am with Sadie….and whoever mentioned jealousy on her part? Really? That’s ridiculous.

Anonymous on July 19th, 2010

one word: TACKY!!!!!!!!!!

ew ew ew.

Kim on July 19th, 2010

It’s only hair and it will grow back! Glasses are cute!

sophie on July 19th, 2010

so Long as she is fully clothed, i really don’t see anything wrong with how she’s dressed, just seems like a girl, whose parents are rich enough to afford to let her play dress up a lot, I meean isn’t that every little girl’s dream, and as for the glasses seriously, what’s wrong with them, if anything they look like fun sun glasses. have a hissy fit when she shows up, in a micro Mini, and high heels, and hair seriously, it’s just hair, you can grow it out, chop it off, you are not your hair, seems like we have a whole lot of prudes.

Firefly on July 19th, 2010

I am all for teens and kids making themselves “individuals” but this “child” is 9. She was being “different” several years ago and I just think it is too much for a child of her (and her brother’s) age/s. Unfortunately it is the world and environment that she lives in.

Will she turn out a drug addict and a drain on society? Hopefully not because her parents do seem fairly grounded but I guess we will see. I would definitely NOT allow or want my 9 year old to do this, on the other hand a 16 year old who was just trying to externally “express” themselves is something different. IF, of course they are not on drugs, have good grades, etc.

JMO on July 19th, 2010

So those glasses are inappropriate. What about Maddox and Kingstons dyed hair over the past years? I find that more inappropriate then a pair of sparkly sun glasses. This little girl imo is only emulating what she sees. She’s def. a DIVA and not saying that’s a good thing but who cares. If she’s not hurting any of you let it go.

sarawara on July 19th, 2010

A person who spends her childhood as an adult will try to reclaim her childhood for the rest of her life. Childhood is precious and easily afforded in America.

Jen DC on July 19th, 2010

@ Jenn: Why is my charge of jealousy ridiculous? Everyone would like to be able to flout societal rules from time to time and it’s unsettling and irksome that the rich and famous get to do it constantly. Also, Sadie’s distaste of it all is a little strenuous to be termed unemotional and detached, leaving… jealousy. Or envy, perhaps, as it’s milder.

Amber on July 19th, 2010

Ugh with a side of not stylish nor flattering.

Sam on July 19th, 2010

Wow. I’m tired of this child (and her brother and parents) too. Another day of basically stating ‘look at me, I’m IT’. It’s sad, because there isn’t much to look forward to in life when you already ‘have it all’. I wonder if she plays with Barbies and dolls? Hope so.

Casey on July 19th, 2010

Sometimes, a parent has to tell a kid No.Madonna may be very provocative but Lourdes can’t dye her hair until she’s 14. Would most parent let their 9 year old girls have a Mohawk?

Mel on July 19th, 2010

This little girl is smiling. If she was unhappy with how she looked, it would be obvious. She’s grown up watching her parents dress up for various award shows, and she’s seen other people do the shaved-head thing. I think her sunglasses are fabulous, and I doubt that she was crying when they were doing her hair. The only mother she has is Jada, the only father she has is Will, and despite having her picture on this website, she’s not fair game to be attacked (nor are her parents). I’m a teacher who has caught kids the same age as Willow doing unspeakable things in school stairwells. If the worst this kid does is have a shaved head and some funky shades, God bless her!

sheryl on July 19th, 2010

i dont see anything wrong with how she is dressed, her hair or her cute glasses. its her style. just like suri cruz likes dresses and heels, shiloh pitt likes boy clothes and short hair…ect. my daughter refused to wear jeans when she was little and said she hated them and they hurt her stomache and swore she would never wear them when she got older. all she would wear was leggings, dresses, sweat pants and shorts. well as soon as middle school came around…so did the jeans and she has been wearing them ever since and she is 20 now!!! lol

Molly on July 19th, 2010

Seriously, she’s 9. She’s grown up with an entirely different societal norm than us “regular” folk. If I walked into my child’s class and saw this little girl sitting among the pigtails and velcro sneakers, I’d probably wonder what her parents were thinking, letting her go to school like that. But you know what? She ISNT sitting in your everyday American classroom. She’s jet setting around the world, attending movie premieres and living a life we’ll never know because she’s got famous parents. I think the glasses look fun and stylish. Her hair is edgy, but cmon, its HAIR. It grows. It’s not permanent. Some of you talk about letting a kid just be a kid. How about letting THIS kid do what she wants as well?

Barbi on July 19th, 2010

It’s Hollywood. She probably has a bunch of idiots telling her how “fashionable, cute and trendy” she looks. They might as well paint a sign on the back of her head that says, “look at me, look at me, i’m all that, look at me.” punk at 9 1/2? yeah…she truly needs that influence.

Electra on July 19th, 2010

You know, I feel like the Smith children are in the minority. While I’m sure all these celeb kids are living surreal experiences outwardly, there lives and how they dress seem completely normal.More expensive but, still normal. Just scroll down the main page! They don’t need an excuse, they can dress how they wish but being surrounded by artists and celebrity life isn’t a very good one.

J on July 19th, 2010

Oh sweet lord, ROFL! Ridiculous.

I heard some people complaining once that Scientologists don’t tell their kids no ever. Is this why these kids always look so ridiculous?

Tee on July 20th, 2010

Well, if Sadie is jealous than I must be too! I’m sorry, but I really don’t find this way this child looks to be acceptable or appropriate. Whatever happened to a child dressing like a child?

camilla on July 20th, 2010

To correct J, Will and Jada are not, REPEAT NOT, scientologists. Just because they are friends with a few doesn’t mean they float in the same boat.

Sarah on July 20th, 2010

This is not the way a normal 9 year old girl looks. It’s just fine when they choose there one clothes and haircuts too, but there must be a limit. And the parents have to make the limits. You can see on her what limits her parents are setting.

I’m from germany and I don’t know what hype is going on about these kids in your country… but this is so sad

JM on July 20th, 2010

well i hope those critical ones amongst you feel very good about themselves. the world must look pretty black and white from that thrown of superiority of yours. she is a little girl and if anyone of you had given a rational argument (RATIONAL!!!) as to why there is something wrong with her clothes i would have found it an interesting discussion.
but you have just made yourselves look incredibly stupid and judgmental and it makes me wonder whether you are the kind of parents who would raise the children who point and stare at laugh at anyone who looks a little different.

willow is not hurting ANYONE with the way she looks, there is nothing inappropriate there unless you CHOOSE to see it. and i hate to think that the world is filled with adults that are so insecure that they have to make these kind of comments about a little girl to make themselves feel better. shame on you!

Ebi on July 20th, 2010

Sadie and co ARE jealous. Will Smith’s family is one family that is well grounded. this child is covered up from head to toe, she does not look sexualized which is what most of the kids in hollywood look like but oh no, you still have to criticize her (oh by the way she is only nine). Her brother is very very talented and she is very cute. Please get over yourselves by the way and they are black( how dare they) Search your souls and you will see that the truth will set you free. More grease to your elbow the smith family, i am very proud of you

lovely75 on July 20th, 2010

I totally agree that this is a bit much for a 9 year old little girl. I do understand letting her “express” herself, but at 9 years old what is she truly trying to say! I have been a dancer and in theater ALL my life, but growing up, when I left the stage I put my dresses back on and picked my dolls back up! I am now 35 and I appreciate the fact that my parents put limits and boundaries on my “self-expression”, if that’s what you want to call it! I’m a strong advocate for the Performing Arts with children, but there has to be limits! I don’t regret one time that my parents denied my blue hair, cut-up clothes, or anything else I wanted to try! Willow and Jaden both need to be more adapted to the normal life of children their ages!

I’m just saying that I’ve been down this road and I’m glad that I hadn’t played out all of my options of “expression” before I was a teen-ager!

Blessing to all!

Ebi on July 20th, 2010

Dear Lovely,
i am sure that at home these children dont dress this way, sorry but these are dress up clothes, they were out on a premiere, it was going out time:)

allison on July 20th, 2010

Geeez people its just hair, it will grow back and she is always fully covered. I really don’t see the big deal.

D on July 20th, 2010

I REALLY dislike that hairstyle on her.

Barbi on July 20th, 2010

JM, at the next Hollywood event, maybe Willow will choose to walk naked and you’ll be one of those fans saying, “willow is not hurting ANYONE with the way she looks, there is nothing inappropriate there unless you CHOOSE to see it.” Having a sense of superiority is not the issue. The issue is Willow’s ridiculous haircut and her parents permitting her to dress in a “punk-inspired outfit” at the tender age of 9 1/2. Present society is the way it is because of that type of mentality. Children need limits! I dread to think what this little diva will be like in 10 years. Everything and anything is acceptable in Hollywood nowadays…it’s truly sad. God would not be proud.

Jen DC on July 20th, 2010

Oh, yes, because walking the red carpet naked is OBVIOUSLY the next logical step for Willow Smith.

Red carpet – not real life. We don’t know how she dresses everyday because we only see her on the red carpet.

How she’ll turn out is a mystery because she hasn’t grown up yet. She’s currently 9 1/2 years old, playing at dress up on her brother’s and parents’ (and occasionally her own) red carpet premieres. Just because she has crazy hair and silly glasses and lace-up boot-shoes doesn’t mean she’ll grow up to be unmanageable, a drug addict, or a teen-aged mom. As a matter of fact, allowing a child artistic license every once in a while in her hair and clothes hasn’t been proven to have any causal relationship with any of those things… As far as I know. If you know differently, please show us all the studies. As a matter of fact, I recall Lindsay Lohan being “appropriately dressed” by your standards (as seen here in 1998 for the Parent Trap – http://img2.timeinc.net/instyle/images/2006/tr/022706_240x320_1998.jpg ) which, by all your logic, would mean that she should be a well-adjusted little girl. As we see, she’s on her way to jail. Likely due to what her unstable home life was like. As far as we know, the Smiths’ home life is pretty stable. We don’t hear about it AT ALL. Unless they are on the red carpet or shilling for their movies, we don’t hear from Will Smith, Jada Pinkett Smith, their older son Trey Smith or Jaden or Willow. If they were such bad parents, wouldn’t the paparazzi have picked up on it by now? Wouldn’t we have at least one arrest or school suspension from the older kid?

When are you people going to get it? It’s the quality of the day-to-day home life that matters and we’re not privy to any of that. Just because the Smiths appear to be lenient parents when it comes to red carpet wear doesn’t mean that they are lenient parents in everything. We just don’t know. We don’t know how they discipline those kids at home or what their rules are… We see the kids in crazy clothes on the red carpet AND THAT IS IT. Get over yourselves.

Janna on July 20th, 2010

I truly, truly do not understand anyone’s objection to this… but I do love to read the sanctimonious ramblings of the crazy-moms that this site is always good for.

JM on July 20th, 2010

barbi, i don’t believe in God so to me that’s like saying the Tooth Fairly wouldn’t be proud and it’s a bit of a mute point.

again, you or anyone else hasn’t actually given a RATIONAL argument as to what is so terrible about her clothes. indecent exposure laws about walking around naked because it is not acceptable. however to go from clothing that you personally don’t like to comparing it to walking around naked is a huge leap and totally irrelevant.

it’s conservative narrow-mindedness that makes you have a problem with this and nothing else. the way she is dressed tells you nothing about whether or not she has rules and boundaries or whether she is respectful…. as i said it reveals more about your own insecurities than anything else.

Ann A on July 20th, 2010

What!!!??? Kids have a right to what they can wear and do to themselves? Straight up, that is wrong. What are parents for then? That is why this society in the U.S. is all about sex, crime, abuse towards children, guns, illiteracy, and the of negatives goes on. (Backwards)

There is obviously no guidance from no one here nor there.

Sandi on July 20th, 2010

You know what? Nobody said anything when Gwen Stefani gave Kingston a Mohawk and dyed his hair. So why is it so wrong for Willow Smith to have a Mohawk? My grandson got one and even though I’m not a fan of the hairstyle, to each his own. Kids like to do their own thing. As parents we are here to guide them. As long as they don’t go overboard, I support their choices. Shiloh Jolie-Pitt dresses like a boy, I don’t hear a whole lot of noise about the way she dresses. Suri Cruise looks like a little old lady in those heels and long dresses she wears, yet, still it’s ok for her. Why is it so wrong for Willow to wear the fun sunglasses she had on. Elton John wore similar glasses, what? she has to be an old white man to wear those type of glasses?

People put too much emphasis on what a child looks like in his or her clothes. As long as the child is respectful and his or her choices are not too extreme, why not let them choose what they want to wear. You know what I think? I think that the people who are “tired of Willow, her brother and their parents” are just jealous. Jaden Smith is an excellent actor, just like his father. But no one wants to say that. Willow, well somebody likes her enough to want her autograph, what’s the problem with that? Her choice in clothing does not absolutely define her.

Sam on July 20th, 2010

Then ‘Sandi’ you haven’t been here reading comments about Kingston and Shiloh, etc.. There have been many posts that say people don’t like it or find it age appropriate. What are you suggesting?

Jen DC on July 20th, 2010

@ Barbi: I was just in Hawai’i for the past 6 months where no one wears much of anything at all. The kids I met there – teenagers, I mean – were polite, well-behaved, respectful and friendly. The girls wore bikinis and short-shorts and tank tops; the boys wore board shorts and t-shirts. Everyone wore “slippahs” (flip flops). Because these kids had grown up in Hawaiian culture, which values respect for elders, friendliness and helpfulness, they were really sweet to me, welcoming and cool and not judgmental.

It’s not the clothes that are “ruining society” as you claim, it’s a lack of values and respect that’s ruining society. A lack of compassion and understanding. And frankly, the inability of individuals such as yourself to accept anything that’s even marginally different from what you’re used to – ignorant, unbending conservatism. You don’t become less respectful because you have a mohawk; the mohawk is immaterial. It’s what you have UNDER the mohawk that matters, your attitude, your upbringing, how you were disciplined day in and day out.

Anonymous on July 20th, 2010

Looks ridiculous.

No, I am not jealous. I’m sure she’s a great kid, but the look is utterly ridiculous.

Barbi on July 20th, 2010

Jen DC, please spare me your BS. I come across people like you every single day who are so open-minded and tolerant of anything and everything that I can literally see their brains spilling out. You sound like a total idiot calling others “jealous” or “envious” of the Smith family just because you don’t like their opinions about this child’s haircut or outfit. Grow up and stop being ignorant: clue – the world does not revolve solely around what YOU like.

Electra on July 20th, 2010

I think its wrong to assume that the people who find “fault” with Willows style of dress are these narrow-minded people. Or that they’re conservative dressers who have never experimented with their style and self expression(but as said before this isn’t self-expression as two other people styled her outfit).

NikNak on July 20th, 2010

She has her dad’s ears, lol.

DaPlane on July 21st, 2010

JMHO…
Not a fan of any member of this family. I understand that Hollywood is just different. But something about these kids just give me the heebie jeebies.

Shawna on July 21st, 2010

I cannot stand this haircut. What were her parents thinking? It looks ridiculous IMO. I don’t understand why people are so happy to have their kids grow up so fast. My almost 8 year old still likes to have pigtail braids put in, like Little House on the Prairie. Why the rush to be a grown-up?

NoAdditives on July 21st, 2010

I agree that Willow’s look is a little ridiculous but as a mother I applaud Will and Jada for letting her be who she is. She’s a kid, she should be allowed to experiment with different clothes and hairstyles. As long as a child isn’t dressing in a sexually provocative manner, what’s the big deal? As many people have said here, it’s not what a child wears, it’s how they act and whether or not they have brains.

I’m nowhere near the experimental phases with either of my children but when we get there they will be allowed a significant amount of freedom as long as they do well in school and stay away from drugs and alcohol. But even now I let my 21 and 3 month olds make as many of their own decisions as possible. My toddler picks out her own clothes, toys, food, etc. She’s happy, we don’t waste money on things she doesn’t want and she already gets to express herself.

If the day comes that she wants a hot pink mohawk I’ll certainly try to talk her out of it but if it’ what she truly wants I’ll let her do it. If for no other reason than she has to learn from her own mistakes. Chances are good that in a year or so Willow will look back at these pictures of herself and wonder what in the world she was thinking. She’ll probably feel she was as stupid as you all think she is. But once she’s a poised, beautiful young woman with her style and “look” all figured out she’ll be glad her parents gave her this freedom. And while your daughters are still figuring out makeup and how to work with their hair, they’ll be wishing you’d given them that same freedom.

MiB on July 21st, 2010

I have to agree with those (Jen DC and others) who say that the important things is that the children are respectful and well behaved, so what if they look a bit ower the top? A bit silly? A bit ridicculus? Being a a bit silly, ridicullus and ower the top is one of the perks of being a kid. She is obviously interested in fashion (isn’t that was playing with Barbies is all about? After all, Barbie is a fashion doll!) and as the kid she is, she combines the stuff she likes in sometimes outrageous ways. I definitely think Jada and Will have something to say about how she is dressed, she never wears short skirts with nothing under, anything see through (except for tights under a skirt) or anything that exposes a lot of skin (no one shoulder or shoulderbare tops, no bare midriffs etc.). The way she dresses now is not going to affect how she behaves as a teenager, nor does it reflect her behaviour now. As someone said, look at Lindsey Lohan, Nicole Richie (pre babies) or Paris Hilton. Drew Barrymore used to drink alcohol dressed in frilly, girly and very age appropriate dresses. There was an article linked here on moms&babies a week or so ago about how we kill the creativity in children by forcing them to conform too much, which is in the end going to be deterimental to the country. The article also pointed out that creative kids who don’t get an outlet for their creativity often either started acting out or got passive (which is one of the things I remember from school). So I say, let her be a kid and experiment her heart out!

She might be embarrased by how she looks now in ten years (I am still embarrased by my beloved turqouise jumpsuit, that would have been totally fashionable now, and by my bobble hats and “Blossom” outfits that were totally fashionable then), but in twenty years she will laugh at it, and hopefully say “I had spunk!”.

Jen DC on July 21st, 2010

@ Barbi: Where do I say I’m tolerant of *everything*? No – I’m tolerant of weird hair, weird clothing… I’m not tolerant of disrespect, bad behavior, cursing, bad grades or violence toward myself, other adults or other children. I believe in household chores, punishment that fits the infraction, and have high expectations for kids around me. I let those kids know what my expectations are so there are no surprises when punishment and disappointment roll around to the fore. The parents of children I care for have often told me that their kids behave better for me and behave better after I’m gone than they traditionally do for their parents. Is it because I’m so tolerant? No, it’s because I set expectations, I reveal the consequences and I let the little things – non-brushed hair, unmatched clothes – go by. Because in the long run, it’s just not that important. (Depending on the situation, of course. Eventually you gotta comb a kid’s hair.)

Barbi, your problem is that you’re wound a little too tightly to see that by squeezing so hard, you’re forcing the individuality and thoughtfulness out of your kids. You want your kids not only to obey you because you say so, but because they realize that it’s, in fact, the right thing to do. That’s where allowing experimentation in clothes and hair at a young age comes in. Plus, it leaves room for you to be a hard@ss about things that actually matter – like respect, like doing your homework, like doing your chores.

I also never said I liked her clothes or her hair. I’m fine with her hair – I’ve had a mohawk myself. And dreadlocks. And been shaven. Her clothes are, for lack of a better word, ugly. But I don’t have to wear ‘em! If she wants to look like she dove through someone’s ’80s rewind closet, AND HER PARENTS ARE OK WITH IT, then so be it. I don’t have to like what the kid does, I only have to tolerate the parts that, again, aren’t going to harm her but instead teach her a valuable lesson in life. What Willow will learn is that sometimes, less is definitely more. (A mohawk *and* lace up shoe-pants?!?) She’ll learn that complete freakin’ judgmental strangers are gonna talk about her and try to make her family life seem overly permissive, as if her parents are bad people and she’s a spoiled brat based solely on what she wears. Either she’ll deal with it or she’ll change her public persona. I, for one, hope she merely learns to deal with it and that her tastes in clothing will evolve as everyone’s does.

For you, I hope your Paxil starts to work. Either that, or you get a prescription for medical marijuana to dial down your anger and anxiety a few notches.

JM on July 21st, 2010

Jen DC, brilliantly summed up. i feel the same way. i can’t believe that people get so wound up about clothing and hair on this site. it’s far more important to me that kids are tolerant, kind, respectful, generous and thoughtful. why should i care how someone else’s child dresses?
i have long since concluded that the people on this site who complain so much about little girls dressed in “boys” clothes, or boys with long hair, or girls like willow who don’t wear drastically conservative traditional clothes – are people who are incredibly insecure and narrow-minded. it’s sad but that’s how it is. and i only hope that if those people are raising kids that they aren’t teaching them to be just as judgemental.

Barbi on July 21st, 2010

My way of being and attitude in life has rewarded me with an amazingly beautiful family, 3 grown and successful children, 2 beautiful and adorable granddaughters, a rock-solid marriage to my high school sweetheart (going on 24 years), a great career and a solid volume of good friends. Aside from my parents and 3 sisters, God is my rock and — yes dear — all without the Paxil or the pot joint. You can keep those.

We can agree to disagree. I’ll leave the two of you (JM) to argue with others. I’m already bored with this post.

Jen DC on July 21st, 2010

@ Barbi: So your Bible doesn’t say anything about being so judgmental about other people? Your posts are like comedy without the laughs. You call Willow Smith a diva – without any facts. You leap to the conclusion that her parents are overly-permissive – without any facts other than her red carpet outfits and weird hair. You prognosticate that she’s going to turn out badly based on one. stupid. outfit. You basically tell me that I’m overly tolerant, when in fact, you have no facts on which to base that either.

I’m truly and honestly glad (not a lick of sarcasm, promise) you’re happy with your straight-laced life and that your kids and (hopefully) your grandkids have turned out for the best. BUT, everyone doesn’t have to do the things you did in order to be successful with their families or their marriages or their careers. There are many successful paths through life’s challenges and this family’s path has obviously deviated from yours with no ill effects of which we’re aware. I don’t see where that opens them up criticisms of bad parenting. Clearly the Pinkett-Smith marriage is working for them, and it’s likely that their child-rearing strategies are too. Then again, their children are 16, 11 and 9, so we’ll see how well (or not) letting Willow chop up her locks and wear weird clothes works out. Until we have proof otherwise, why don’t you give them the benefit of the doubt?

If you get this worked up about strangers’ engaging in a debate with you, perhaps you should give up posting.

Barbi on July 21st, 2010

Jenn, perhaps you should stop suggesting what other people should or should not do. You come across as a know it all. You argue with Jenn, Sadie and Barbi, etc. You might want to apply your advice to yourself, why don’t you? Stop posting. I also feel Willow looks ridiculous. You gonna argue with me now?

JM on July 22nd, 2010

er Barbi, you do realise you just agreed with yourself right?
not a very christian attitude you’re showing is it? aren’t christians supposed to be tolerant. oh no, what would god say if he could hear you now? would he say bravo for bashing on a 9 year old?

MiB on July 22nd, 2010

Barbi, don’t forget to change user name when You agree with yourself honey, looks a bit silly otherwise

I still agree with JenDC and JM, it is amazing how much adults are blinded by how children/teenagers look rather than how they act. I grew up close to a family with two daughters who both went through phases of “experimenting” in their teens (they were close in age), one became a vegan and a goth, the other ate and looked “normal” but moved in circles that were ideologically on the brink of neo-nazism. The adults were all worried to death over the vegan goth, but failed to hear the lyrics of the songs that sounded from her sisters room. Us kids knew which one of the sisters was the one to be worried about. She eventually did come around ans is a well grounded adult now, but she could just as well have ended up in a very scary community and she will tell anyone that she finds it scary too that no adult cared about what company she kept as long as she and her friends looked normal andbehaved normal in familiar company.

Jen DC on July 22nd, 2010

@ Barbi: Ohhhhh, bossy boots Barbi… Why should I, especially when it is so much fun baiting such a humbug as you? I’m perfectly happy with my daily contretemps on the internets. Why is it I come across as a know-it-all, when in fact, I’m open to new ideas and you aren’t? At least try to be logical if you’re not gonna be right.

You’re mad because your arguments don’t make sense and you don’t like being challenged on the factual implications of your silly claims. Which is why I suggested you not comment/post further because your fury is getting in the way of a calm, adult discussion of a 9 year old’s sparkly glasses. (I mean, you see how ridiculous this all is, right? Right?)

And I re-reiterate: I never said I don’t think she looks ridiculous. In fact, I say above that I think her clothes are U-G-L-Y and I’ll go even further and say I feel sorry for her parents that they bought the stuff, since really, she can only wear a bunch of the stuff once – unless they save it for Halloween. I kinda like her hair, although it does accentuate those ears she clearly got from her big-eared daddy!

You should take 10 minutes and have a calming prayer. We’ll still be here when you get back.

Molly on July 24th, 2010

I can’t speak for anyone else, but my problem with this kid’s clothes? I think they’re freaking ugly and tacky as anything. I don’t think they’re inappropriate and I don’t think she has bad parents. I just think the entire family dresses unattractively. And that’s 100% subjective. But since the blog asked, I responded honestly.

Lori on July 27th, 2010

To everyone on this board..

I believe this read: What do you think of Willow’s British-inspired style?

Why is it that none of you can understand that this post asked for the reader’s opinion of the matter? Whether you believe Willow’s attire is ridiculous, outlandish, spunky or plain awesome, the point is it’s *your* opinion and other people are entitled to their own. I just love it when someone expresses a negative view towards something they’re called “narrow-minded, jealous and judgmental” (Pot calling the Kettle black, no?)

That being said, I do believe a poster is out of line when they begin to make judgment calls on the child’s personality or make off-handed comments about how she’s raised based on how she’s dressed for a movie premiere for goodness sake. Again…my opinion, and I can respect you if you disagree.

As for the question itself, here’s my take on it: what do I think about Willow’s style? I don’t like it, personally I think it looks very unbecoming on a nine year old. And no, it doesn’t have to be flashy, trashy or naked to be considered so (like I said, it’s unbecoming not inappropriate). It just feels like ‘too much’ and what bothers me is that it calls ‘too much’ attention unto Willow and it gives off a sense that she’s being over exposed. It’s admirable she has such a sense of style (aided ofcourse, by her -STYLIST- Mariel Haenn), and I’m all for self-expression but I just think it should be a little toned down, as this look is more flattering on teenagers and young adults.

And I’ll admit I’m biased in my assessment because I’m basing it on this and other pictures of her that have been out recently… and to me they all bring out the same conclusion.