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Tori Spelling Hopes to Give Children ‘a Normal Life’

04/19/2010 at 04:00 PM ET
Jason LaVeris/FilmMagic

Ever mindful that fame is “fleeting,” Dean McDermott and Tori Spelling are striving to give their two children “as normal a life as we can,” the actors tell Babble.

“At this age, I don’t think it’s necessary” for son Liam Aaron, 3, and daughter Stella Doreen, 22 months, to stay grounded, Spelling explains before pointing out that “obviously, they realize there’s a lot of things going on around them that’s not like other kids.”

At the same time Spelling, 36, says it’s important for her children to realize “you’re not anyone based on what you’re born into.”

“We’re both on the same page in not taking any of this for granted,” McDermott, 43, adds. “We want to teach them how to be normal.”

Finding quality time as a family is sometimes a struggle, Spelling concedes, but she insists that the cameras which trail them for Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood “aren’t exactly the problem.” Instead, she says that the demands of her multiple careers as an actress, an author and a fashion designer are to blame.

“As a working mom, I try really hard to find that balance because I want it all,” Spelling says.

“I want to be the stay-at-home-mom who has dinner on the table and takes my kids to carpool. I hear other moms say, ‘I just dropped the kids off at school, and then I had time for a yoga class.’ I think, ‘What is that like?'”

While “it all sounds so inviting” to Spelling, she says she often wants more — a lot more!

“I want to run an empire,” she explains. “I love all my business ventures, so I struggle every day on how to blend the two. We get through it. I run on adrenaline, but I’d love to have more family time.”

FILED UNDER: News , Parenting

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Showing 18 comments

izzy on

“tori spelling” and “normal life” shouldn’t be in the same sentence……no matter what. it’s just not possible in any way, shape, or form.

i’m not bashing her, i’m just realistic and my point of view comes from living a “normal life” like all noncelebs.

HeatherR on

I don’t think that being “normal” can be taught. Kids learn from example.

meghan on

Normal. That’s why they put them on TV.

bo-peep on

tori spelling is just so needy … the surgery, the insta-relationships, the reality shows and books, the painfully obvious eating disorder. There is nothing and no-one she wouldn’t sell in a heartbeat to feel better about herself. Sadly, this seems to include her kids.

Lorus on

I couldn’t agree more with the previous posters. Her idea of normal and what normal actually is are completely different!

mom_of_2_kidz on

I agree with HeatherR, she has always had that crazy Hollywood life style so thats whats she used to. She does try to do normal stuff but with all the cameras and paps in her face all the time I’m sure its hard. The kids seem to be happy and Dean & her make a lot of time for them as a family so what more could you ask for. Most people work so it is a matter of balancing.

Laura on

It’s all a matter of priorities and what’s important. How much money and career do you need? Once you have enough money to pay the bills say no to the rest of it. You children should be the priority.

Maggie on

Give me a break Tori. You just want your cake and eat it too. You weren’t raised normal, how do you even know what the word “normal” is. Your kids are exposed everyday to the public and who put them there? you and your husband. Very interesting that now you say you’re trying to bring them up normal. I think the normal word in your dictionary is to expose them to the public everyday of the week. You want your glory and fame, you could never adjust to just be a mother and a housewife, therefore, your kids will never know what is like to be driven to school by mom or dad, that’s thejob for your nanny, drivers, or body guards. It’s interesting how this “Hollywood” moms try in front of the media to “play everyday normal moms” when us the everyday mothers KNOW what is like to be real mothers, just not playdates for our kids.

JessicaC on

this woman confuses me terribly. If you want your kids to be normal then dont put them on tv. Dont complain about paparazzi stalking you on your show when in reality you’re pretty D list nowadays, and dont complain about the paps stalking you when you call startraks…She uses this whole “my mom” drama as a storyline on her show, then when she realizes the public thinks SHE’s the one acting like an immature baby, then all of a sudden she’s like “im going to handle this in privater” well duh!! I feel bad for her, it’s almost like she doesnt know who she’s supposed to be unless it’s written down on a script.

Lila on

I love Tori and I watch her show, but I agree that they won’t have a “normal” childhood if she doesn’t turn the cameras off. I know that they will still have to deal with the Paps, etc- but at least their home would be a sancutary.

I do feel bad for her because she really has never had a normal life, or parents who were there emotionally. And I think most people in her life are only there because she is famous. She does really seem to truly love her children and shows that affection, so I would never say she was a bad mom, but she needs to learn to step away from the spotlight now and then.

Jessicad on

She’s saying she wants to have a normal life and she gets bashed, what kind of sense does that make? I actually thinks she’s pretty funny and seems really down to earth. She loves her job and she shouldn’t have to sacrifice her dreams for her kids, I think that makes for a miserable life, you can have it both ways. Like she said she’s trying to find a balance, like most of us are. I love my daughter, but I love my job and my hobbies too, it doesn’t make me a selfish woman or mother to continue doing the things I love.

JM on

jessicad you’re missing the point, no one’s saying she shouldn#t have a career or hobbies, but there is no need to put her kids on tv or subject them to every photo shoot she’s in. most celebrities manage without involving their kids in their work. and it just seems really fake when she says she wants them to have a normal life. she clearly doesn#t want it enough to take them off tv and keep their lives private…

Alyssa on

I don’t agree with Tori at all. A normal life doesn’t involve cameras in your house to make a reality show. I always see them posing for the cameras with their kids. Normal? um, not really.

Diana on

Seriously???!! Give me a break. Like it seems everyone is saying you can’t expect them to have a normal life when they are on a TV show. And I’m sorry but I don’t think it is a good enough excuse because of their age. A 3 year old knows what is going on and when he grows up from such a young age on TV then you can’t say you want them to have a normal life. That isn’t normal. At what age does she think they need to start having a normal life???

maggie on

Jessicad tori has no job! the other MAGGIE i agree with you too! i hate all of these reality show moms (kate g, tori, etc) and how they keep on saying that they want normal lives and wish that the paps. would stay out of the way, but they wouldn’t last 10 mins without it! after j&k+8 ended what did kate do… well she didn’t backout of the spotlight (that’s for sure) and now she’s too desperate to stay in it. while tori her dad was aaron spelling so i doubt that she would know what normal people like us do for a living, also she takes her kids out to every red carpet she’s on, in these ridiculously pricey (and ugly) looking outfits and shows them off like this season’s prada bags.

Sophia on

Ummmm don’t Tori and Dean have a reality show? I’d hardly call that a normal environment for kids to be growing up in. And even if they didn’t, growing up famous isn’t normal, period.

Jessicad on

But that is her job, that was my point. It’s what she wants to do and she should be able to have both. I don’t see why she deserves to be bashed, what she said has nothing to do with how much plastic surgery she has or what her kids wear, some of you are just mean.

elsa on

What is “normal” these days, people?? Doesn’t seem like it can be defined anymore :)

Anyhow, I think Tori strives really hard to provide what she perceives to be normal. If you watch her show, she seems to struggle with the same challenges many of us do. The only thing is she’s invited us “looky-loos” into her life, and then deals with the harsh critcism.

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