Boy/Girl Twins on the Way for Mark McGrath!

Iris Moncada

Sugar Ray frontman Mark McGrath and fiancée Carin Kingsland are expecting twins — a boy and a girl conceived via IVF — in May, they tell PEOPLE exclusively.

“I’m so excited,” says McGrath. “My DNA paranoia is kicking in: I’ve got to feed these children. We’ve got to get the nursery together. And what do you do when you bring the kids home?”

“Most parents are like, ‘Oh, the wonders of child rearing,’” he says with an exaggerated sigh. “But we’re freaking out! The first year is going to be gnarly.”

All joking aside, McGrath, 42, says, “I love them already, but I need them to come out so I can really shower them with love. I can’t wait to meet them.”

Visit PEOPLE.com to read more about McGrath and Kingland’s recent engagement! Leave your advice for the couple on raising twins at the left.

Comments

Stephanie on April 6th, 2010

I wonder if they planned boy/girl ivf on purpose. I know now with the genetic planning you can do that. I have twin boys and it is def. hard in the beginning, nothing like having a singleton and then other children.

Wish them luck!

Dawn on April 6th, 2010

Being that they are not the same sex you don’t have to worry about the whole twin identity problem. I have fraternal twin boys but they looked identical for many years. At first I worried about making sure that they knew we acknowledged their different personalities but it just never was an issue. You have to remember that they don’t know life any different than being a twin and always having the other one around. I would try to do “dates” with just one but they both always ask if brother could come too, they never liked to leave the other one out. Cute story: in kindergarten a kid came up to Bradley and called him Tommy and Bradley said, “oh, I’m Bradley, you are looking for Tommy, he is the other one of me”. They are 14 now and still rarely do things without each other. They don’t even see how close they are. And, Mark, as for the first year being gnarly – well, it’s a lot longer than that. Just like any one baby, there are a lot of phases, so it doesn’t get easier, it just gets different as they age. But what a lot of people don’t tell you is how fun they can be (at times). Ours still make us laugh all the time. Congrats and best wishes for healthy, happy babies.

kelsey on April 6th, 2010

Congrats to them, I’ve always liked him!

Liddi on April 6th, 2010

I have 4 year old boy/girl twins too.
My best advice is simply it does get easier.

momofthree on April 6th, 2010

I am a mother of twins. Best advice ever….KEEP THEM ON THE SAME SCHEDULE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MamaLlama on April 6th, 2010

Look at his face! He looks so happy!

LL65 on April 6th, 2010

Congratulations!

Carol on April 6th, 2010

To the first poster, it’s pretty difficult to actually plan the genders of twins, although technically possible. It is still being reviewed by the FDA and currently there are only 2 clinics in the US that have been approved to offer it. While many clinics do genetic testing on 3 day old embryos, it has more to do with chromosonal abnormalties than sex. it’s really luck of the draw. You have just as much of a chance for same sex babies as opposite sex. It all depends on how many embryos are transferred back into the uterus (usually only 2 or 3 depending on age of the mother). It also depends on the quality of the embryos, they are graded on a scale and only the best are transferred back, since they have the best chance for implantation and survival. Some women only have 2 or 3 eggs grow, which lowers the chance of survival during the lab process. It all depends on the reason for the infertility. There are many factors for father and mother.

As someone who has struggled with infertility for many years, I went on to have IVF and will be giving birth to my boy and girl this Thursday. I commend people in the public eye for bringing light to the painful experience of not being able to concieve on their own. It can be a difficult and dark time in their lives and is something I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

Ethical doctors would not generally do IVF for a patient/couple if there was no serious reason.

This of course excludes the Octomom issue. In my opinion the Dr who handled her case was completely unethical transferring as many embryos as he did, expecially since she has proved that she could concieve (natural or otherwise). That Dr put a very bad light on IVF, which has helped so many achieve their dream. It angers me that one person can do so much damage to this delicate subject.

Best of luck to the new couple! I wish I had some advice, but being a (soon to be) new mother of twins myself I really can’t

To Carin – enjoy every squirm, kick, and hiccup you are experiencing now. Take time to yourself as well as spend time together as much as you can.

To Mark – Your wife is going through some difficult emotions and physical changes. It can be very painful to be pregnant, especially with two babies. Take care of her and don’t take it personally when she cries at the drop of a hat. She’s probably scared and anxious and needs your support…

elby on April 6th, 2010

Carol and the McGraths:

Welcome to the world of twin parenting! I have two sets of twins (girl-girl and boy-boy) and it’s not always been easy or fun but it’s definitely worth it.
It is *very* hard at first but don’t expect too much of yourself; until my girls were about 3 months old I felt I’d achieved something from the day if all 3 of us had had a wash, got dressed and I’d eaten something other than biscuits. Leaving the house was an added bonus and somewhat of a military operation. Never compare yourself to ‘singles’ mummies because their lives are very different to yours, make friends with other multiple mums because they will be a great source of guidance and advice and remember that small babies don’t care about what they’re wearing or how they look as long as they’re comfortable, well-loved and well-fed. One of my TAMBA friends had boy-girl twins and her son often went out in his sisters coat or her daughter wore her brothers trousers. If they were the first to hand then it was fine. You will also be able to pick up loads of clothes at nearly new sales or similar. Secondly, don’t beat yourself up about the small things, one of my sons wouldn’t sleep in the cot during the day so I just used to put him in a quiet corner in the baby seat and he’d happily nap there. I had two toddlers and another baby, where he was sleeping wasn’t nearly as important as that he was sleeping!
My other advice is to buy two of everything and keep stuff upstairs and down; we had two sets of changing equipment, baby bouncers, muslins, etc because they’re always on the wrong floor.
And lastly, just enjoy it because it’s a wonderful experience.

4lilboys on April 6th, 2010

I have 4 little boys (the middle two are fraternal twins). My best advice is the same as motherofthree – KEEP THEM ON THE SAME SCHEDULE. That saved my life. Let them sleep in the same crib until they cannot anymore. They are use to being next to eachother and some babies do not do well when separated. Mine didn’t. Their sibling/twin is kind of like their “security blanket”.

Bancie1031 on April 6th, 2010

I have been wondering how come Mark and Carin wasn’t on here! Thanks CBB for finally getting a post up about their pregnancy.
I have always been a fan of Mark’s. I am SOOO happy for them! I wonder what made them go with IVF? OH well really none of our business but still curious. I hope we see them on here more often now.
Can’t wait to see the twins and to hear their names

Sarah M. on April 6th, 2010

It’s great to see so many women giving advice without being judgemental of others. I don’t see that too often on here anymore!

I don’t have children of my own, but I’ve worked at a day care and nannied. I’ve taken care of many sets of multiples. The most recent was a family with an 8 year old, 5 year old twins and and 1 year old triplets. I decided not to stay with that family long term, but because of the hours needed and not because of the kids. I’m overly organized most of the time and love kids, so I think I’d do okay if I were to have multiples. It wouldn’t always be easy or fun, but I think the good would out way the bad in the long run.

Good luck to the McGraths and your lucky to have your precious pair!!

CelebBabyLover on April 7th, 2010

Banie1031- If his wife is the same age as him or close to the same age as him, I’m guessing it may have simply been her age.

Anyway, what I want to know is how on Earth they pulled off keeping this a secret until a month before the due date!

Bancie1031 on April 7th, 2010

I reread my last comment and decided I better ask my question more clearly so people understand what I was trying to say ….

Carol said “Ethical doctors would not generally do IVF for a patient/couple if there was no serious reason.” So I wondered if Carin and Mark needed help or chose to get help (not necessarily to be like Octomom but just to help them become a family a lot faster) …. either way completely their choice and I’m extremely happy for them!!!

Bancie1031 on April 7th, 2010

OH and btw
Carol – Congratulations! I wish you the best of luck and hope in a few weeks you can give some great personal advice to Mark and Carin on twins.

Carol on April 7th, 2010

I’m under the assumption they needed help. I know that most ob/gyn’s won’t refer a couple to a fertility expert unless they have been trying 6 months to a year of trying depending on age on mother. And even with that most doctors won’t go straight to IVF, it’s a very evasive and expensive procedure. They will usually start off with testing – if it’s male factor then IVF is usually the only option, but if it’s female they will run a battery of tests, although about 20% fall into the “unexplained” catefgory. Then they will start off with oral drugs (clomid), then move on to injectible drugs and insemination. If that doesn’t work (usually 3 rounds each – 6 months at least!) IVF is considered. It all depends on the patient though. I didn’t respond to oral meds at all, I did with injections but they didn’t work. Finally I had 2 surgeries to make sure my uterus was clear and clean and did IVF. Like I said, very invasive! It involves self injections 2-3 times a day for a month and a half at the very least, plus 2 procedures – egg retrieval and transfer. Plus insurance doesn’t often cover it and it can be upwards of $20k.

Guilana and Bill Rancic are in the middle of an IVF cycle right now. They have spent at least a year testing and trying other methods. She has unexplained infertility and they talk openly about it. If you search hulu for their appearance on The View they talk a lot about it. I think it’s wonderful

The advice on these comments are things I will absolutely take when raising my own twins! Thanks to all for the openness and I know that the McGrath’s are thinking the same thing! Ok enough of my little schpiel lol!!

Jan on April 7th, 2010

I believe the first thing about being good parents is to be committed first to each other and support each other. She will be a tired mom, so Mark, be helpful and get her help. Also try to watch the tongue! Congratulations and God Bless!

Bancie1031 on April 7th, 2010

CelebBabyLover – they didn’t pull it off until. the month before … though they did get close! I saw a picture of them a month or two ago and emailed CBB about putting them on the site and never heard back.
I’m not sure how Mark and Carin got so close to their due date especially with TWINS without someone noticing and placing them in the spot light but if you remember correctly Vin Diesel’s girlfriend went all 9 months then HAD the baby and we still didn’t know until 4 months later when Vin TOLD us about her.
It can be done just not very often.

CelebBabyLover on April 8th, 2010

Carol- I’m not sure I’d say that IVF is usually the only option for male factor infertility. Just like with women, there are multiple things that can cause infertility, and I think whether IVF is neccesary depends on the type of male factor infertility.

My parents struggled with infertility for several years, which turned out to be male factor….which was succesfully treated using medication (I don’t know whether the term “fertility drugs” is used for the type of medication men with infertility take or not).

And in fact, the medication was only needed the first time around. Mother nature took care of things the second time around!

I just wanted to make sure that any readers struggling with male factor infertilty know that having male factor infertilty does NOT neccesarily mean you’ll probably need to use IVF, or even any invasive procedures, for that matter!

Rikki on April 8th, 2010

With my son, I remember reading every parenting book out there, I was so nervous. Years later, this is what I’ve learned: Nothing will prepare you for parenting. All the best laid plans/adivce never work out, so give yourself a break, be yourself with your kids cuz that’s how they’ll learn the most. Roll with the punches, every phase (they grow out of them so fast), because before you know it they’re all grown up. So just enjoy it, the good and bad, you’ll do fine just so long as you always remember to talk through everything, love always, and just be the example for your kids.

Linda on April 8th, 2010

I have a 2 year old boy and fraternal twin girls that are almost one. It is such an amazing thing, watching them together, twins are fantastic. I have found them to be quite easy, to be honest, because the twins amuse each other a lot, but I know that a lot of other people have a tough time. Just enjoy them. It’s such a cliche, but it’s true. They do really grow up way too fast.

Twins on the way on April 8th, 2010

I have twins on the way and they are also a boy and a girl. I freaked out when I found out that I was having twins. Mine was natural. My father is a twin. When we were in the OB’s office having our 1st ultrasound, the technician did the ultrasound and said that it was twins. I looked at her and asked her if she was joking and she said, “No, I would never joke about something like that.” I then looked at my husband and said, “this is all your fault”, started crying hysterically, and walked right out of the doctors office. I did not check out, pay my co-pay, or schedule another appointment. I left everything for my husband to do. With that being said, just know you are not the only ones who “freaked out”. I still have panic attacks when I think about having twins, but I know that there is a reason for everything. I wish the two or should I say the four of you the best of luck with everything.

Jamie on April 8th, 2010

I also had twins – fraternal boys. It is really hard, such as if your husband is away a lot, you can’t grocery shop with both in a cart, or get much with their stroller. You can’t go to the park, while you are putting one on a swing the other one runs away and which one do you go for?? I’m sure they will get a lot of help – I stayed home with mine alone most of the time, and almost lost my mind!!! You need to have at least a part time job to get a break once in a while. One may nap for 3 hours, and the other one does so in a half an hour!! Quite an adjustment.

CelebBabyLover on April 9th, 2010

Jamie- Obviously I don’t know where you live, so perhaps this isn’t the case wherever that is, but….Where I live, several grocery stores offer some wider carts that have two seats in the front (as opposed to just the one that most carts have).

So with those, you CAN put both twins in one cart (provided, obviously, that they’re old enough to sit up on their own. Two carseats probably wouldn’t quite fit.).

Also, I have seen people with really young baby twins cart them around the store in their carseats, with one carseat in the seat of the cart, and the other in the basket. I have also seen people with older twins or close in age young children have one kid in the seat of the cart, and the other in the basket (not the safest thing to do, I realize, but sometimes you just do what you have to do! ).

LouBud on April 9th, 2010

I am also expecting twins in May (we think boy/girl too!) and can completely relate to what “Twins on the way” said about the shock. Ours are conceived naturally and we have no family history of twins. I also said the “your joking” to my OB and he gave the same answer, that he would never joke! My husband found it funny more than anything whilst I was quite upset for a few days. Now we just can’t wait to meet them! Being British I have no idea who Mark and Carin are but I look forward to hearing about the arrival of their twins, what they name them and of course seeing a photo!

Penina on April 9th, 2010

I have survived my 14 y/o identical twin girls.
The best piece of advice I was given, and now pass on, is to keep the kids on the same schedule. When one wakes and demands to feed, feed them both. If you let them stay on individual schedules, you will go nuts from extreme sleep deprivation.
Hire help for at least a few hours a few times a week, for your own sanity.
I also agree with keeping them together in a crib for the first few months, it seems to soothe them, again, allowing everyone in the house to rest a bit more.
Mazal Tov, and above all, ENJOY THEM!

ann on April 9th, 2010

ENJOY! Enjoy every moment of every day….they grow up fast.

ZoeyBear on April 9th, 2010

to celebbabylover – There is no pharmocological cure for severe male factor IF. Gaia bless your family member is they were able to overcome a low sperm count with clomid enough to concive naturall. But mostly it doesn’t work when there are motility problems or a low enough count. And since it takes 90 days to make the little bugers, and by the time one figures out that is the issue the couple has been tryng for years already, there just isn’t time to try a drug protocol that hasn’t been proven to work.
I **wish** IVF werent the only option.
I also want to point out to posters that MOST people who receive IVF in the us are well under 40 and MOST have singletons. CHechk out SART.org.
Good luck to Mark & Carin. I think he is so cute and I wish them the best.

Michelle on April 9th, 2010

Congratulations to them! I have 7 year old boy/girl twins , born through IVF as well. Thank you for going public with this. I know how invasive and stressful it can be, but it was all so worth it, and I would personally do it again in a heartbeat if I had to. Please, get lots of sleep. The first year will be wild, but so worth it.

Mary McGrath on April 10th, 2010

People always ask me if I’m related to Mark McGrath. I’m sure he’s a long lost cousin, and the fact the he’s having twins (I’m a twin, and there are two sets in my family) make me wonder about our family lineage.

I’d love to know if we’ve got an uncle or aunt between us!
http://www.marymcgrathphotography.com

CelebBabyLover on April 11th, 2010

Mary McGrath- You and Mark may very well be distant cousins, but I don’t think the fact that he and his wife are having twins means anything. While a man can potentially influence his daughter’s chances of having twins (i.e., if twins run in his family, he could pass the gene for hyper-ovulation onto his daughter. This is why it sometimes seems like twins skip a generation. ), he has no influence over whether his wife has twins.

Fraternal twins happen when a woman ovalates two eggs at once (identicals happen when an egg splits, and happen by pure chance), and obviously a husband can’t control how many eggs his wife releases!

CelebBabyLover on April 11th, 2010

Oh, and I’m confused by this quote in the full article on the main PEOPLE site: “We love the idea of getting married on 10/10/10,” says McGrath, “but the twins might have another idea.”

What does he mean by that? They don’t have to let the twins control when they get married! If they want to get married on 10/10/10, then why should the twins stop them?

tcclifford on April 12th, 2010

I am currently feeding one of my 6m old twin girls conceived via IVF! There will be times when you wonder what the heck you were thinking having twins but it is soo worth it! Try to keep them on the same schedule and give yourself some slack…twins are hard work. Just wait till their personalities emerge and you get the first smiles and laughs! Congrats and Good Luck!

Beth on April 12th, 2010

Keeping the same schedule is a definite plus! I have boy/girl twins as well and keeping them on the same schedule was the best thing that we did. You will go insane if they aren’t.
Congratulations!

Kim on April 12th, 2010

The hardest part of having twins is that when one stops crying…the other starts. When one is done eating, the other’s hungry. When one goes to sleep, one wakes up and you will feel like ripping your hair out and giving your right arm for a good nights sleep so do your best to keep them on the SAME SCHEDULE!!!!! Best advice I could give.

Momoftwinsplusone on April 12th, 2010

My best advice as a mom of twin boys (and another 4 month old) is to keep them on the same schedule! Feed them at the same time, put them to bed at the same time. Everything must be done together! And, enjoy every moment. Parents of twins have double the work but double the joy!

Laura on April 12th, 2010

I have fraternal twin girls. I was definitely freaked out when I found out I was having them. I was so freaked out I told everyone I wanted to give one up because I just couldn’t do twins. The reason: I was so overwhelmed with the idea of having twins.

You know–it is difficult. The first 3 months are especially difficult but a twin mom gave me the best advice: Sometimes it’s minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day.

It’s true. Sometimes they both want to eat at the same time and they both cry. You just take a deep breath and deal with it, trying not to get overwhelmed in the process.

My twins are 14 months now and it’s getting easier. I didn’t say it’s easy. It’s just easier and more fun. I love to watch them grow as their both so independent of each other. I couldn’t possibly have given one up.

It’s a very empowering process! You’ll get into the groove and figure it all out. You know why–you have to! They are depending on you!

Olivia on September 29th, 2010

I saw Mark the other day on the Wendy Williams show and his honesty and humor were so refreshing! And his twins are so adorable!! Congratulations to Mark and Carin