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Gwen Stefani ‘Running Out of Time’ for Third Child

03/17/2010 at 11:00 AM ET
Courtesy InStyle

Calling motherhood “the hardest thing” she has ever done, Gwen Stefani has a decision to make — whether or not to try for a third child with husband Gavin Rossdale.

“I don’t know,” the 40-year-old No Doubt frontwoman and L.A.M.B. designer laments in the April issue of InStyle. “No one could have prepared me for how awesome it is, and how hard.”

Noting that sons Kingston James McGregor, 3 ½, and Zuma Nesta Rock, 18 months, have “a lot of energy,” Stefani admits that “it does seem weird” she hasn’t yet welcomed a baby girl, given her flair for fashion.

However, she’s also cognizant of her biological clock, revealing that she often feels as though she is “running out of time.”

Yet there are equally compelling reasons to stop at two. “I … don’t want to spread myself so thin that I can’t even be good for them,” Stefani muses before adding, “Poor Zuma, he’d be the middle guy.” She adds,

“I’m not focusing on it right now, but it’s not up to me anyway, you know? These things are miracles, so we’ll see.”

If her family does stay the same, Stefani quips that it is her sons’ future girlfriends who will benefit the most by inheriting her famous wardrobe. Kingston is showing early signs of fashion icon status himself, however, and Gwen says it’s his own doing.

“At that age they like to be in control of everything, so I let him choose,” she explains. “Luckily, everything in his closet is cute so no matter what he picks, he’s gonna look good. For a while he was into costumes. Now he doesn’t even want to wear shoes.”

Describing Kingston as a “little punk” who is nicknamed “Sid,” after the late Sex Pistols bassist Sid Vicious, Stefani says the boys have little in common beyond their parentage.

“It’s crazy how the second child is so different from the first, and has the same parents. They are totally different, and they look totally different,” she observes, noting that Kingston is a “head to toe” mini-Gavin while Zuma favors Stefani and her father Dennis.

Her second son is also “more of a show-off” than Kingston, Stefani says. “[Zuma] wants everyone to watch him, and he’s a goofball and he’s really silly. He’s a funny guy.”

The family split their time between Stefani’s native Southern California and Rossdale’s native London. While it’s hard to be away from her extended family, she says that the UK offers a distinct advantage as far as the boys are concerned.

“I take Kingston to the gym with me, with no nanny or assistant, and that would be very rare in L.A. — that I could actually go somewhere on my own,” notes Stefani. “Things can get out of hand with the paparazzi, and I don’t feel safe.”

All those days spent across the pond has brought about another perk, albeit a humorous one. When asked whether Kingston and Zuma have developed British accents, Stefani points out that children are “like little sponges.”

“Once in a while, Kingston will pick up a word, like, ‘I’m going to have a bahhth.’ And I’m like, really? A bahhth!”

Having recently wrapped a 60-concert tour with No Doubt, Stefani says the experience was emotional on a multitude of levels. Not only was she back on stage with her band after a prolonged hiatus, the singer/songwriter realized that her life had come full circle since she wrote most of the lyrics.

“I had tears in my eyes when I was singing certain songs,” she admits. “Like, ‘Simple Kind of Life’ … where I say, ‘I always thought, I’d be a mom.’ And all of a sudden I am, and my kids are sitting on the side of the stage watching me sing. It was really intense.”

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Showing 65 comments

Lori on

Lovely! I like her very much and her boys are sweet. But I don`t see a third child, I don`t know why…

Lola on

Miracles? Not up to her? Huh? Of course its up to her whether or not she has unprotected sex with her husband during ovulation and becomes pregnant. Of course it may seem like a miracle when you’re 40 and you’re getting to the point where you’re too old for kids and may have difficulty becoming pregnant, but it really isn’t.
I just find some people pretty naive and delusional. Life isn’t a fairytale, Gwen!

KellyJS on

Well Lola… I’m guessing you either don’t have children and want them or just simply woke up on the wrong side of the bed. If Gwen wants to consider them miracles then so be it. No need to be a Debbie Downer.

GiannaG on

Lola, I think she simply meant that if/when she is ready to try again there is no guarantee that she will get/remain pregnant. I’m sure Gwen is aware how babies are conceived and that when you cross 40, for some people it’s hit and miss. She won’t know until she tries whether or not she will be able to conceive easily, if at all. I think her acknowledging that she may be running out of time is quite grounded.

Lola on

Actually, I do have children, Kelly. I just think its funny how her and so many other celebrities express themselves. Just how some people are shocked when they find out they are pregnant when they were having unprotected sex all along. It must be a miracle, right? Wrong. It just doesn’t make sense to me. Why come up with fantasy explanations to simple, straight forward situations?

Chelsea on

Lola, relax. I’m pretty sure Gwen knows what it takes to make a baby. It’s not a crime to consider your children miracles.

Amy on

“Why come up with fantasy explanations to simple, straight forward situations?”

Well that’s one way to take the joy and magic out of life hey!!

Bren on

Children most certainly are miracles. Do you know how many women have miscarriages, fertility problems, and stillborns? Go through a miscarriage and try to have a baby again at 25 with no success and you tell me how little of a miracle a child is. That is the most ignorant statement I have ever read.

Lissette on

I love her personality and candor and see nothing wrong with her calling babies “miracles.” I think she’s very aware that it doesnt come easily to some people especially given the fact that she was in her mid-30′s when she had Kingston. She’s got a great attitude and I’m still hoping she’ll have a girl one day!

Janna on

Lola: “Of course its up to her whether or not she has unprotected sex with her husband during ovulation and becomes pregnant”.

If you *really* think that’s true, talk to the millions of women who do just that, and *don’t* become pregnant.

Not everything is as “straightforward” as you think it is.

luny on

i don’t know maybe the´ll have another boy.

Crystal on

Gwen!! Have your little girl!! I really hope they decide to have a 3rd baby. Kingston and Zuma are adorable. Adding a little girl to the mix would be PERFECT!! Just like Victoria Beckham, Gwen is definitely a fashionista and having a little girl would be out of this world for the both of them! :)

DS on

She has plenty of time. Forty is young.

laura on

Lola…I have two children and was delighted to be pregnant with my third. Naturally having had two healthy pregnancies, I did some what expect it to be as simple and straightforward as you describe. I had plenty of exposure to pregnancy loss as an employee at an obstetrics practice, but let me tell you…when it happens to *you* it’s different and you do realize that it is not simple and straightforward. I went in for my first check up and was told that I had a “blighted ovum” miscarriage…basically, even though it hadn’t happened at that point, I was going to lose the baby.
When you are informed about all the things that can happen along the way between ovulation-conception and birth, YOU should have an appreciate that every single healthy child born *is* a miracle of sorts.
Most likely Gwen is simply acknowledging the medical reality that the chances of conceiving easily after 40 are not what they are at 30.
Give her a little break. :) She’s a singer/fashion guru, not a professor.

Luna on

I do believe children are miracles and I want her to have another miracle because her previous two are too adorable.

RachelfromBoston on

Personally, I would like to see Gwen with like 6 more babies! hehe.. she’s such a great mom and such a loving, genuinely sweet person. She deserves all the happiness & success in the world.

And a note to her little miracles – no one knows Gwen’s or anyone else’s personal journey (and it’s not the public’s business) to becoming a mom. Some people have it easy and some people it takes longer/needs assistance/etc. It doesn’t always happen the way you want it to.
<3

Monica on

I’m sorry Lola … but you obviously cannot have children or are still a little new to the adult world. First and foremost, children ARE a miracle. Life IS A miracle. The fact that you have to demean it for you to accept it is your problem. So how about letting someone who CAN have children, embrace their mortality whether by conceiving premeditated or by a miracle. I mean, to each their own but sheesh … let the woman convey her feelings without you getting so “scientific”. You must be an angry soul because your priority right now is to obviously piss in everyone’s cheerios. Take your happy pill today?

Lila on

I also think children are a miracle. It took us 3 years to conceive our daughter (finally through IVF). Unfortunately I will be one of those women who don’t benefit from the sperm meets egg plan.

I think she has a healthy outlook on it. She is taking the time to really think about it and consider ALL the members of her family. So many women just get pregnant because they want another “baby”, they don’t take the time to think about their other children and how it will affect them- good or bad.

Sarah on

Point is, any sex with Gavin probably feels like a miracle. Kidding!

Can I just add that in addition to considering kids a miracle, even when you do “try” or take a unprotected sex, it happens if it happens route, amazingly enough most women can only get pregnant like 2 days out of the month and their temp/ovulations has to be just right.

I would rather someone regard unprotected sex with their husband and by extension the creation of a child from that a miracle then a lot of other women who run around with 4 kids and have no idea what it means to have to work at creating one nor appreciate having them.

Elle on

LOL @ Sarah, Gavin is a DILF

cassie on

awww i love this..they are a beautiful family

JMO on

Crystal I don’t think she can just have that little girl! I mean it’s not up to her really :)
But I’d love to see her with a girl but her boys are so precious. I know it always comes up but if all else fails and she really wanted another child down the road she still has adoption as an option. I don’t know I guess because of her clothing line and her likeness for all that Haiku stuff I could always picture her with a korean or asian baby!!

Jennifer on

It’s not up to her, because it’s up to God. God creates babies and HE has planned everychild. So yes, they are miracles and no it’s not totally up to her whether she’ll get pregnant. My first was unplanned, then when I tried for my 2nd it took over a year of trying. So it doesn’t always happen as perfectly as we’d all want it to.

Crystal on

JMO-You know what I meant! Lol! I meant try for a little girl. The rest will be up to God. :) Adoption is a great option as well. I just hope they get have a girl.

Jurnee on

Oh wow, why is everyone coming down on Lola? Yes, children are miracles. But there is also a scientific answer to how children get here. They don’t “just happen.” Unprotected sex usually produces children in women of a fertile age. Pretty simple!! Can we be smart and understand the mechanics of how children get here, and still consider them miracles? I think so!

Lyoness on

That was a sweet comment about No Doubt coming full circle. I think most of the band members are married with children now. I love “Simple Kind of Life”. I can totally understand why she cries during that part of the song.

Rachel on

I agree that actually it’s not a miracle. It’s science that’s all. Kids are overhyped to be something precious, amazing etc etc thats why they’re all spoilt and believe the world should fall at their feet. They’re great don’t get me wrong but i won’t be bringing my daughter up to think she’s a ‘miracle’

Karli on

RIGHT ON SARAH

Julianna on

LOVE THEM ! Gwen , Gavin , Zuma and Kingstone are an adorable family! for sure is my FAV.C elebrity Family !

All of them looks very happy! and gwen is as good singer as mom !

What Great 8)

Lee on

@Monica, where are the happy pills? I think we all need them before coming on this site LOL

Jules on

The journey of the sperm to the egg is a dangerous and difficult journey. Then with implantation, cells splitting, multiplying, genetic code merging, and then development leaves many possibilities for things to go wrong. Having a baby is indeed miraculous.

Sage on

Rachel- “They’re great don’t get me wrong but i won’t be bringing my daughter up to think she’s a ‘miracle’

I hope you’re not bringing her to think she is just like every other kid just over overhyped,thinking she may be something precious which isn’t true, not particularly amazing etc etc.
Cause that sounds so harsh to me. I know the science of how kids come to be. I’ve been apart of that process, I have a daughter. But my daughter is my little miracle, my pride, my joy, my heart and I will never be afraid of telling her that. Also I don’t think it’s naive or a slap in face of science.
I mean you may think that would make her a spoil brat when she gets older, but I would point out maybe just maybe it will give her a sense that she is loved and how an awe mommy is that she is on this earth, and I get to have her as my daughter. Just a thought for you.

cd on

Sage, PERFECTLY said!!!!

Felicity on

A miracle is something that is UNLIKELY or VERY RARELY happens. There are MILLIONS of women who have successful conceptions and pregnancies everyday, and this includes those that needed medical intervention. Do you think that the experience, and resulting child, of a woman who conceived naturally, is any more or less important than a woman who needed help to achieve the same end? I think not! This experience is not a miracle, just part of a process to perpetuate our species, just like ALL the other animals in the animal kingdom, whether it happens naturally or not! There is nothing miraculous about it!!

Doree on

I think Gwen is a great mom & you always see her with her kids. I agree with Gwen that children are a miracle. I have been trying to have my own little miracle but unfortunately
it hasnt happened. I wish her & her family the best!

Tee on

@Felicity – Every single child is unique. Either God allows him or her to come to be or not. If He chooses for the child to be here, through medical intervention or natural processes, it will be LIKELY. If He decides otherwise, it will be UNLIKELY for that child to exist. There will never be another Kingston or another Zuma. My daughter is the ONLY one that exists. So YES – she is a miracle. ALL CHILDREN ARE MIRACLES. You do NOT have control of your body – God does. If we had control, all women of childbearing age that wanted to have children would. Lola’s comment was ignorant and yours was as well.

Gracious Kay on

Nothing wrong with being the middle child :)

JM on

i think people are kind of giving lola a hard time, i see what she means maybe it was just put rather bluntly. we all know that there is a biological explanation of how kids come about, it is not some unexplained miracle. i tihnk maybe that’s what she was saying, there is no mythical, unidentified source, sperm meets egg = baby. that’s it.

let’s get one thing straight though, if we all want to be adults here, god does not make babies. that is about as likely as saying the stork brings the babies. it’s a bit childish to suggest that there’s some dude sitting up in the sky “making” babies (out of what exactly). let’s not trivialize things for which there are perfectly good scientific explanations. it’s a bit patronising to the rest of us when some people all-knowingly profess that “god makes the babies” as if that is the ONLY and OBVIOUS explanantion, when actually it’s no more than a fairytale. sorry guys, but seriously, let’s not pretend we are naive children.

Lex on

What, she doesn’t like spending time with her classy and lovely stepdaughter Daisy? LOL

It’s so weird that my boys are the exact same age as Gwen & Gavin’s boys – I grew up a huge No Doubt and Bush fan! We are stopping at two, for the very reasons that Gwen expressed. We think we’d be spreading ourselves too thin. Her boys are cute – hope they always have a happy healthy family. :)

fki on

Oh I’ve always loved Gwen and her style. She seems pretty true to herself.

Lol at Lola, chillax, a baby is a miracle if you think of the growth of a tiny embryo into an actual person. And it isn’t that easy to have a kid at 40-particularly a healthy kid. A woman’s eggs do change as she gets older unfortunately.

I wish her and Gavin (another favorite of mine) and their kids all the best!

Crystal on

JM-Are you and athesist? That has to be the only reason why you don’t believe God makes babies. It’s not just science. I am appalled at some of comments on this board. Children are great miracles. There are some women who can’t just have “unprotected sex” and get pregnant. Padma Lakshmi and her doctor have talked about what a miracle it was to have her daughter due to her suffering from endometriosis. Was that just science too? I’m shocked and saddened that people would take God out of the miracle of like and chalk it up to “just science.”

m-dot on

She’s such a cutie and seems so youthful, I still see her as a 20-something, and here she is 4o yrs old. I would love to see her w a little girl, but 2 gorgeous little boys are cool too. lol

lauren on

“Of course its up to her whether or not she has unprotected sex with her husband during ovulation and becomes pregnant.”

Yes it’s up to her whether she has unprotected sex with her husband but it’s not always up to a woman whether they become pregnant or not. Please tell your theory of how to get pregnant to my two friends who struggled with fertility issues in their twenties. Even if she becomes pregnant, that doesn’t mean that pregnancy will result in a child…as my other friend who had a miscarriage at the age of 27 will tell you.

Rye on

I agree with Jurney and I think that people are being a little too harsh on him/her for there comments. I definitely think children can be considered miracles in a lot of ways, but I also feel that there is a scientific reason and logic for how babies come into this world. I think Gwen’s statement is pretty flimsy in the sense that she is clearly saying that she really has no idea whether or not she is going to have another kid. She mentions not wanting Zuma to be a middle child, which is a bit odd and seems to point to her actually “NOT” wanting a third baby…but, she is also pointing out that she seems to be letting nature take it’s course. I like her attitude towards the press and in interviews. She mainly keeps to herself and seems to maintain a decent amount of personal space from them when discussing her life and kids.

I also have to say that I think Gwen would be the cutest thing ever with a baby girl, but like someone else mentioned, I can’t SEE it actually happening. I would put money down that if she DID get preggo again, she would have herself another baby boy.

Geo on

“Stefani admits that “it does seem weird” she hasn’t yet welcomed a baby girl, given her flair for fashion.”

I’m sorry but what does THAT have to do with anything? Since when does the sex of a baby have anything to do with what the mom does, or says or wants or has, etc. etc etc.

What a weird and stupid statement. I certainly hope that’s People.com’s twist on her comments because that sounds totally ridiculous. Didn’t anyone else think so?

Geo on

@JM – obviously you have your truth and other people have theirs. Don’t belittle other people’s beliefs either. And p.s. there can be science AND religion at the same time, they are not mutually exclusive!

CelebBabyLover on

Janna- I agree 1000 percent! It would be great if we could just “do the deed” and presto! end up pregnant. But that’s not how life works. Not only do I consider babies to be miracles, but I consider conception to be a miracle, and the growth of a healthy baby over the nine months of pregnancy to be a miracle.

There are so many things that can prevent either of those things from happening. Just ask my parents. They struggled with infertility for several years, and that struggle included two miscarriages. Not only that, but they were in their 20s when they struggled with infertilty. So there are certainly no guarantees when it comes to getting pregnant!

Amy on

Good god can Gwen not even express her opinion on how she sees her children without people finding something to criticize now!!

Melanie on

Lola,

Having children is a miracle…if you have ever done it you would understand her statement.

Rachel on

I will always tell my daughter i love her and to me she is special, but it doesn’t mean she is better than other children who she may be in the same class as. I’m a SAHM and i gave up a good career for her, so i certainly do love her. She is no miracle though, she was concieved as i moved house and didn’t take my pill for 4 days. There was no guy with a beard and sandals involved at all, i find it offensive actually to think it always comes down to God. I think people spend too long looking to the sky for answers and explanations when all you should believe in is YOURSELF!

Ann on

Miracle:
1.an effect or extraordinary event in the physical world that surpasses all known human or natural powers and is ascribed to a supernatural cause.
2.such an effect or event manifesting or considered as a work of God.
3.a wonder; marvel.
4.a wonderful or surpassing example of some quality: a miracle of modern acoustics
Having babies IS a miracle. Try to explain how the whole process of getting pregnant even happens…i mean really think about it. A sperm meets an egg right? but how did that process even start? IT IS A MIRACLE!!

Rebecca on

Having just gone through my 8th miscarriage, i find Lolas comments quite harsh. Anyone with children should class them as miracles. I’ve now been told that it’s too dangerous to try for any more, so that’s it for us. Hold on to your babies tight and be grateful that it happened for you.
x

Roxy on

JM, your comment came across as extremely condescending.

Even though I’m agnostic, I’m not going to tell other people what to think nor am I going to judge them for being supposedly “trivial.” What does it matter to you? You believe what you want and they believe what they want. At the end of the day, others’ opinions won’t change yours just as your thoughts won’t change anyone else’s.

KittyKat on

Children are miracles. I was told I’d never have children by 3 doctors. I have two children to date, a 3 yr old and a 4 month old. They are miracles!! Gwen is so right!! Good luck Gwen with your decision. Love you!

kellie on

Rebecca,
I am sorry for your losses. I too, had many miscarriages and 4 surgeries plus months of hormone therapy all in my twenties to try to conceive a child. My husband and I went through our ups and downs for four years but were also very open to adoption. So we went that route and then on my own, midway through adoption I became pregnant and had a healthy baby boy 9mo. later! We want a sibling for him and will have one -whether we get pregnant again or adopt is yet to be determined. But don’t give up your dreams if you are open to other possibilites and options- you can have a family you want one way or another and it will be beautiful!
And babies ARE miracles- amazing, beautiful miracles!
Luck to you, Rebecca.

Lisa on

I learned that pregnancy wasn’t as easy as I thought it would be. My journey to motherhood included months of trying, 3 months of pregnancy ending in a miscarriage, 3 months of recovery from the MC, and then finally a pregnancy (which I am now in my 7th month of!) Nearly 2 years after saying ‘Let’s have a baby!’ we are finally getting close.

Life is a miracle. My mom and sisters all got pregnant their first time trying every time. One of my sisters now is in her mid 30s, and she didn’t get prego the first time, and she is so confused and hurt by this. It’s not completely black and white. I consider myself so lucky to be blessed to be this far along. Seeing women who struggle for YEARS with no results, at least my MC proved I could get pregnant.

I am only 22, and my husband and I are over the moon. But, even in your 20s, parenthood isn’t a guarentee and it’s not a cut and dry easy journey.

Anna on

I have to agree with JM.

We all know how babies are made, and yes some people have more trouble with it than others that does not makes babies miracles.

For the peopl who think JM’s post is condesending, please reread the posts from the christians. Their posts are far worse.
If ‘god’ created all the babies than why does he give them to junkies and child molesters etc etc.

JMO on

I don’t think there is really a right or wrong answer when it comes to if you think your child is or isn’t a miracle. For me even though I’m also agnostic I still think children are miracles. The very fact that a women can grow a child inside her to me is fascinating and that 9 months later this person comes out and grows into an adult who someday will have children of their own! The cycle is fascinating and to me very miraculous!! But not everyone will see it that way and that’s just fine.

Geo – no I didn’t find the comment to be wierd. I think the journalist probably asked a quesion of, “do you find it odd that you don’t have a daughter” and Gwen replied to it with she agreed it may seem wierd.
One day my cousins and I were talking about babies and they all agreed that they couldn’t imagine me not having a daughter some day. I asked them why and they said, “we don’t know we just see you with a girl rather then a boy” … I think bc people see Gwen as this fashionable, artistic, independent women they’d just assume that she’d be able to bestow these great qualities onto a daughter? But I feel quite the opposite. Maybe it’s cause she has boys but I could def. picture her with all sons vs. having daughters.

Anonymous on

It blows my mind how far people go to interpret what someone says…Did it ever occur to someone that either you’re not seeing the whole interview (because it may have been edited) or that Gwen was just trying to keep her answers short and sweet? Just a thought…

Molly on

We think getting pregnant is easy and just happens. I mean, afterall, there are so many people that get pregnant that aren’t ready to have a child or don’t want a child. BUT, if you think about all the things that have to happen at just the right time and in just the right way from conception to laboring to birth a child you would feel that each child brought into this world is a miraculous event. They should be seen as blessings and reveered as such.

Caro on

I understand that people like to see children as little miracles and wish to respect other people beliefs. But every time I come on this blog, there are the “angels” and god references. Ladies, don’t write on a blog that Santa Claus exists of you don’t want a rational person to argue that no, Santa Claus/god/angels don’t exist. This is 2010.

katie on

i really like the way Gwen Stefani always stresses how tired she is and how much WORK raising a child is.

Lou x on

i LOVE what she said about ‘a simple kind of life’, i always used to really feel for her when i heard the line she is talking about, and can relate to it on many levels, i am SO happy for her, so can totally understand why she gets so emotional!

also, when she says that she mocks Kingston when he picks up a word here and there is sooooooo funny, they are so down to earth and i love them for it x

maggie on

thank you anna! i’m catholic but i think it’s weird how everyone says it’s god’s choice for people to have kids. wow and i thought that having a child was the parents choice. aside from that so many people took this nice sweet article and turned it once again into a debate.

Kate on

Conception involves both science and the “miraculous” part. What gets me are the celebrities, or just regular people for that matter, who blatantly have unprotected sex throughout the month and then call the conceived child a “complete surprise”. Shall we send those people back to basic sex ed classes?

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