Amber Valletta Explains No-TV Stance

APEGA/E.G/Abaca

There are clearly perks to having a mom in show business, but none bigger than a trip to the movie theater for Amber Valletta‘s son Auden, 9.

Currently appearing in The Spy Next Door — costarring Jackie Chan — Amber noted during a recent appearance on The Bonnie Hunt Show that “this [film] he can actually see, because it’s PG.”

For Auden, it is rare a treat indeed! There is no television in the home Amber, 35, shares with husband Christian ‘Chip’ McCaw, because the couple don’t want their son growing up addicted to the small screen.

“Also, because its so nice and quiet in our house, and I just love it,” she explains. “Besides the three dogs and my son, it’s just really peaceful.”

“We do DVDs and we go to the theater and we go to movies. He knows what’s going on in the world, pretty much. He thinks I’m a bit strict, but he knows what’s going on.”

The Spy Next Door is in theaters now.

Source: The Bonnie Hunt Show

Comments

That is awesome! My Husband & I have been without television for about two years now and it’s been so calming. Sure there are times we get frustrated when we don’t have it, especially if there is a show that sounds good but in the long run we know we are better off without. We rent movies through Netflix and go to the Movies as special dates.
We plan to raise our son the same way and find other ways to connect with him rather then the television.

- Sarah on January 24th, 2010

Great! I didn’t have TV in my childhood and I honestly didn’t miss it at all, now I’m grateful to my parents and there’s no TV in my own flat.

- mt on January 24th, 2010

I think there’s a happy medium to be had with television. I find that parents who use the television as a free babysitter are abominable. A family member of mine does just that and it frankly sickens me. But on the other hand, I think there are those who take television avoidance to such an extreme that it becomes a forbidden fruit type thing for children. I think it’s quite sad if parents are unable to see the educational value of having a television because they are so afraid of warping their kids with cartoons etc. Sarah, I think you have a more balanced view of things in your house. The way you run your family is not how I do it, but I totally think you’ve found a compromise and it clearly works for you.

I just think there’s two extremes when it comes to TV and children and neither are particularly appealing to me.

- Alex on January 24th, 2010

I never got why celebrities who are on tv themselves take a stance against having no tv in their house. It’s sort of hypocritical IMO. However I think TV in moderation is fine. I don’t agree with the tv as a babysitter but trust me there are times you need to get things done and it’s the only outlet you have…I much rather my children watch a tv program then play video games.

- JMO on January 24th, 2010

I grew up in a home with TV, so it’s hard for me to see what the big deal is. Unless the stuff that’s on is wildly inappropriate, or if it’s constantly on, I’m not one to think it’s much to fuss about. Honestly, even though the TV was always an option for me, I frequently preferred reading or playing outside. My parents didn’t have to “forbid” TV, because I really wasn’t that interested in it. Even now, I only like to watch one or two shows, and spend the rest of my free time reading. I’m hopeful that my daughter will be more like I was/am with it, because it makes it easier than having a kid that becomes obsessed with sitting in front of the TV and needing to tell them no.

- mrsh on January 24th, 2010

I think that is a great idea but not sure if I could do it. I just have a stance that there is only one TV in the common area.

- Shirese on January 24th, 2010

Madonna grew up with no tv…

- Janet on January 24th, 2010

I was raised in a house with a TV and enjoyed it.During my years as a student I didn’t have one and didn’t miss it.When I moved with my boyfriend we owned one for a couple of years.The only impression I got from the thing was a background noise and the numbers of books i read dropped drastically.
We got rid of it after our first son was born.We’ve got 3 boys now and I don’t think they’re missing anything:we go to movies,we go to the library where they can pick DVDs,books,they have outdoor activities,we got papers and magazines in the house.I’m more a radio person.I’m not stupid and I’m aware they probably watch TV stuff when they’re at their friends(yes,other children still talk to them) or relatives.And since the school hasn’t called us in,I guess they’re fine and manage to do without the alleged education value of TV.

- Cécile on January 24th, 2010

mrsh, I am with you. I grew up with tv too. We had a tv in every room yet I found myself never really interested in watching it. I was too busy playing and pretending or being outside with friends to care about it. My parents never had to tell us to turn the tv off to get things done. And now I don’t even watch it that much. Of course I enjoy my certain programs but when I’m bored I don’t usually find myself turning it on to find something…I’d much rather waste my time on youtube and CBB hehe

- JMO on January 24th, 2010

um, just because people have tv at home doesn’t mean their kids don’t play outside/read/ have creative outlets. i get really tired of the whole “we’re better because we have no tv” snotty attitude some people seem to have. tv in moderation is fine (and if you think movies are ok -rentals or in the theater, i don’t see the difference!!! someone please tell me why videos/films are so ok but tv is a mind sucking wasteland?) as long as you set limits and don’t use it as a substitute for interacting with your kids. and for the record, we DON’T have tv at home and haven’t for the past 2 years. not because i think it’s soooo much better for my son, but because it’s an expense i can’t justify these days. there are so many awesome, educational shows on tv that i wish we still had it (i’m a history/discovery channel fan and love the science shows on pbs for my son) but even when we had tv at home, it was never the center of our lives. i’ve never agreed with polarizing stances on things (ie – NO sugar, NO tv etc) i think everything in moderation.

i agree with the person who said the more you make something forbidden, the more kids search it out. in middle school there was a kid in my class whose parents wouldn’t allow him to eat any sugar.. and guess what? he would sneak to the 7-11 down the street from school and buy heaps of candy.

- amandamay on January 24th, 2010

I agree w/ you Amandamay…alot of times when I hear people say “oh, we don’t allow television in OUR house, it seems to be with a bit of superior attitude. I honestly don’t see anything wrong with t.v. in moderation. I never used it as a babysitter, and even though my son is now almost 13 years-old, I still moniter what and how much he watches, in fact, usually we watch together. It was only this past year that I allowed a t.v. in his room, so that when his friends stay the night, he can play movies that we rented or play video games. I don’t think that there is anything wrong with television in moderation. Some of my favorite memories are sitting curled up on the couch with him, watching Disney movies. =)

- CTBmom on January 24th, 2010

It’s a personal decision whether to have TV in your house, but I’m also sick and tired of people who think they’re better parents for not having one. Who knows? Maybe those parents have kids spend their days in front of a computer screen or fiddling with a Nintendo DS — IMHO, that’s not necessarily better than spending that time in front of the TV. Whatever happened to “everything in moderation” and setting limits for your kids?

- alp102000 on January 24th, 2010

I’m really sorry if my post came as snotty.I stated that I grew up with a TV in my parents home and liked it sometimes,even tried to own one set has an adult and discovered that it add nothing to my life. I was happy enough to find a partner who was on the same page.
We don’t advertise it,just answer when we’re asked.I’m also surprised to read about the “superior” comments,because I feel it’s the other way around:when someone learns that we haven’t got one set,the air of condolence just never misses and I end up feeling like my children must be pitied,deprived of a vital thing.
They seem OK to me,neither smarter nor dumber than any of their friends.Of course,it’s always possible they grow up reproaching us for this lack,who can tell?

- Cécile on January 24th, 2010

As with many things, it’s a personal choice.

For my family, moderation is key. Although the television is present, my children tend to immerse themselves in other activities so, at this point in time, they’re not especially captivated by any particular program.

- Liliana on January 24th, 2010

I love TV and so does my daughter. We watch it together! we make popcorn and laugh at the silly nickelodeon shows. My daughter is a talented figure skater and also, acts at the performing arts center. She’s a well-rounded child and i’m proud of her. TV hasn’t hurt us one bit. I don’t put restrictions on TV with her, she is independent to know right from wrong!

- g!na on January 24th, 2010

I’m with G!na and the other women that say its fine in moderation. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, with hulu and other websites on the internet its fully possible to “watch tv” without turning on the television. People my age(I’m 20) and people younger are fully aware of that, while some parents are not.

- Electra on January 24th, 2010

I have many televisions in my home and i see no problem with it. If you feel like watching tv, you watch. if not, no big deal. i don’t feel like anyone in our house is a television obsessed shut in but can be an option. I find that TV actually can bring the family together. It’s not like the two year old is watching law and order or anything so i don’t see a problem.

- Luna on January 24th, 2010

I always find tv watching is like ‘forbidden food’ …enjoy it when it’s there and know it’s in the house…but you don’t always have to watch it! Cute boy- funny how no one really has complained about his hair yet!

- lipsy on January 24th, 2010

One thing all the parents who forbid TV should think about is the impact it has on your kid, culturally speaking. For the rest of your kid’s life people will be indignantly saying, “You’ve never seen such and such show or movie?!?” over and over. I have a friend whose parents severely limited her TV and movie watching (not even totally eliminated it) and she misses all kinds of references we make and we definitely tease her about it.

Not saying it’s nice of us to do but what can you say when you grew up in the 90s and your friend has never seen Clueless or Clarissa Explains it All or Captain Planet?

- Kristen on January 24th, 2010

Lipsy there was already a comment list full of hair comments the last time this picture of him was posted

- Natasha on January 24th, 2010

I grew up on TV, I actually love TV but it’s funny now that I have kids I don’t have time to watch anymore. On the other hand, I hate my kids to watch. I feel like a little bit of TV is harmless and any day they only watch like 30 minutes of it is a good day to me. There’s so much more they should be doing, IMO. Today for example I took them ice skating. Didn’t go great but it got us out of the house and doing something new. I’d rather be out having fun rather than sitting home in front of the tv.

- Mary on January 24th, 2010

I find parents that completely remove things from their child/ren’s lives cause more of a problem in the long run. My daughters have a friend who is not allowed to watch TV. So when she’s here for a play date, all she wants to do is watch the television. My daughters, on the other hand, have never been denied the chance to watch television and most times, they’ll still choose to color or read books or play together. They watch TV most when they’re tired, or when they’re waiting for the school bus.

- Olivia on January 24th, 2010

I grew up with the opposite. The TV was on in our house from the moment my mom woke up until she went to bed. It was on when we weren’t even in the room. I didn’t really see what was going on until I saw my sister doing the same thing with her kids. Her kids are so addicted to the TV that you have to turn the TV off to get them to eat or use the bathroom sometimes. It’s not good for their health. When I watch the kids, they are allowed to watch a movie or maybe 1 TV show then the TV goes off and we play. I sit down on the floor and play with them. And that is exactly how I intend to be with my future children. TV is ok, but it definitely should not be a substitute for interacting with your children.

- Lisa on January 24th, 2010

I’m a nanny, and the family is fine with the tv in moderation. If it’s nice out, then they’d prefer time to be spent outside and/or active. An episode of Super Hero Squad for the 4 year old every now and again is fine, a movie if the weather’s bad, maybe. With the 1 1/2 year old, shel’ll watch maybe a signing vieeo periodically or a 1st Impressions/Baby Genius/etc. made specifically for babies. I turn on the music channels for her much of the day and it’s just like listening to the radio. I’m more of the philosophy of things are fine in moderation. As long as the kids aren’t sitting in front of the tv the majority of the day, it’s not a huge deal. Also, I think the more you forbid things, the more kids will seek those things elsewhere.

- Sarah M. on January 24th, 2010

“everything in moderation” is my motto

- l.j. on January 25th, 2010

I love tv and my daughter is allowed to watch, but of course she watchs programs that are for her age, and she does learn interesting things, and we also go out to play at the park, read books, bake cookies together but sometimes she watchs tv and is ok for me, as somebody said before “everything in moderation”.

- sil on January 25th, 2010

I agree with the everything in moderation school of thought though actually we don’t have a tv licence, we do own a tv/DVD combi and my kids can watch DVDs whenever they want and we watch some Cbeebies stuff online. For us it wasn’t the shows but the ads, I don’t know what kids tv is like in the States but here the ads are terrible and all for hideous plastic toys and junk food.
My husband works away Monday-Thursday so in the evenings I really appreciate my down-time from the kids and will often watch a DVD or something online. I’m a big book reader so I’m happy not to have a tv.

- Elby on January 25th, 2010

The “moderation” stance seems right. But I actually know some families without a TV and with kids who are all right.

- All Women Stalker on January 25th, 2010

My little girl loves to watch TV! She would watch it all day if I allowed her too! But we don’t let her, we do lots of activities. But sometimes I think little kids need a break too, and there are some days like Sunday, were she doesn’t want to do anything but hang out in her PJ’s and watch some TV and I don’t think it’s a big deal…I also think that a TV education, well she has learned lots of things from her shows that would have never occured to me to tell her, let alone make a point of teaching her. I myself am an avid reader, so I don’t understand the draw for her, but our most perfect days are her laying against me watching her favorite shows, while I read my book!

- Charley on January 26th, 2010

Auden is going to do nothing but watch TV when he gets older! Seriously, parents think they can control a child. They will ultimately do as they please. I know so many kids who didnt have any restrictions regarding TV… and they all did great things when they got older… they graduated from the best universities etc etc…. Parents need to relax more. Each child has their own unique DNA which cannot be changed.

- anna on January 26th, 2010

anna- I’m probably mis-understanding you, but….Are you saying that you think parents should just let their kids do whatever they want since they (the kids) will anyway?

- CelebBabyLover on January 28th, 2010