Kelis Says Motherhood 'Makes What's Important Clear'

12/16/2009 at 06:00 PM ET
Johnny Nunez/WireImage

As it does for many, motherhood has given Kelis a new perspective on life. “I don’t think it’s changed who I am, but I think it just makes what’s important clear,” she explains in a new interview with Honey.

Mom to 4 ½-month-old son Knight with estranged husband Nas, the 30-year-old songstress says she doesn’t even mind the 5 a.m. wake-up call from baby boy.

“Seeing that Knight’s awake and he’s got this bright, sunny, delicious face looking at me like, ‘Good morning mom.’ It’s literally the greatest thing to wake up to and it tickles me every time. I adore him.”

With a new album — tentatively titled Flesh Tones — due in stores next year, Kelis has been busy on the work front as well, but she says she  “never thought” about taking a break from music. “Organically, one thing just led to the other,” she explains before adding,

“I feel like your child should be a part of your life, not that your life should change because of your child. I never wanted to be that type of woman who couldn’t balance her family and work.”

Image is, of course, a big part of Kelis’ job and to that end she admits she was “scared to death” about the weight she gained while pregnant with Knight. With a sense of determination to reclaim her pre-baby body, however, Kelis recalls thinking that “there was no way I wasn’t losing that weight…absolutely no way!”

Her approach to maternity fashion was equally fierce. Noting that “[pregnancy] is not the most ideal physical situation,” Kelis nonetheless says that it need not be used as an excuse to let yourself go.

“It’s amazing when you can be both beautiful and pregnant. Because of the discomfort, I think a lot of women just give up. But I never gave up. My hair and nails were always done and I was always wearing something bright and shiny, made me feel better. I think that’s important.”

That said, Kelis says she has no plans to revisit her maternity wardrobe! “I think I pulled myself together pretty well but I don’t know if I’d wear [those outfits] again,” she explains. “I just looked like a nice pregnant lady (laughs). Am I running to put that sh-t back on now? No!”

Source: Honey

FILED UNDER: Bodywatch , News , Parenting

Share this story:

Your reaction:

Add A Comment

PEOPLE.com reserves the right to remove comments at their discretion.

Showing 24 comments

sat on

Cute! I may have to check out her new tunes.

fuzibuni on

I haven’t read an interview with Kelis before. And I must say, she did not impress.

First she says that motherhood has taught her what’s important, and in the next breath she talks about how important it is to wear shiny things, get her nails done, and quickly lose the baby weight.

But the best part was when she said:
“I feel like your child should be a part of your life, not that your life should change because of your child. I never wanted to be that type of woman who couldn’t balance her family and work.”

I get what she’s going for here… but she really could have worded that better. It comes off as a bit insulting to struggling working moms, stay at home moms, and her own child’s needs.

I don’t know… perhaps it’s just this interview, but she came off as bit immature and self absorbed.

KayeM on

fuzibuni, I completely agree, couldn’t have put it better myself.

Sharon on

I don’t mean to be insulting or anything like that, but as soon as I saw this woman, first of all, I didn’t know who she is, but it sure looked like a grandmother to me! She looks like a 60 or so year old grandma! When I read she had a 4 month old baby, my jaw just dropped. Who in the heck is she anyway?

RaisingChild on

Hope she is able to balance motherhood and the crazy music industry!

kmb on

wow, she’s 30. i glanced at this photo and thought she was a grandmother.
and i’m sorry, your life SHOULD change because of your child. if you’re bringing another human being into this world, your life changes. i don’t really know this woman at all, nor do i think i’ve ever listened to her music, but now i won’t.

carys on

wow.

smug mummies are so not charming.

CelebBabyLover on

My only comment about this interview is that I hope Knight gets to see his daddy from time to time!

webs on

she’s definitely self absorbed…she always comes across as quite materialistic & recently, money-grubbing as well.

I like a lot of her music though…and thats all I really care about.

Her & Nas has a gorgeous baby.

Just Saying on

I agree with fuzibuni too. Also, does she not realize that her son will one day read about all the drama that has occured between her and his father? Yet “motherhood has made what’s important clear”?!!? And she can’t support herself with her record deal and a new album due soon???!!! Oh but that’s another topic. I never liked her music and based on her comments and actions she doesn’t come across as a very likeable person.

Ruthella on

I agree too, fuzibuni. She comes off a bit self-absorbed… Maybe just the parts they decided to print?

Niko on

She has a Maya Angelouesque appearance in the pic above, lol

Annie on

I completely disagree. I think that the American approach to motherhood where the mother has no identity outside of her children is what she is reacting to. I also agree that children should be welcomed into your own life and not be the center of your existence.

I sense a lot of resentment from the mothers on here. Your failure to maintain balance (or your figure) after becoming a mother is not a reason to attack every mother who chooses to live life differently. Mothers should maintain their own identities and lives after children.

babyrama on

These mamas aren’t showing resistance, just expressing the undeniable truth that hey, when you have kids you BET your life is going to change. You can still work and keep your identity and be a separate person and all that, but if you deny that your life has changed, you are either lying or doing some very questionable parenting. Probably the above poster who noted that the wording of her response is the problem is right.

gaias mom on

I tend to agree with Annie. In America, there seems to be more than ever a business of motherhood and a mantra that goes along with it. Nothing about me has changed since becoming a mother. I haven’t undergone some metamorphisis. What’s important to me hasn’t changed and I like to think that I had my priorities straight long before my kid entered my life.

Yes my life has changed. if you get a dog, a new job, or get married- adding any new permanent thing into your life will change it. It doesn’t mean, you’ve changed and either way it doesn’t matter. changing or not changing is a reflection of a woman as a parent. Perhaps its just indicitive to who you were before.Motherhood is different for everyone but in my relatively short time as a parent, I’ve encountered amount of self-glorification.

m-dot on

For those who don’t know Kelis, she’s a very talented and creative artist. The pic they have up of her is terrible! She’s actually very attractive w a really nice body. Her style is very ecclectic, but works for who she is a an artist, and is ever-changing.

She’s also my fellow NY girl, so perhaps she came across little strong to the sensitive ears on here, but she actually comes across very down to earth, honest, and funny in most of her interviews.

AND I think some of the moms on here need to relax. I happen to agree that your child should be an wonderful addition to your life, and not become your life. We are raising our kids to be happy, healthy, productive members of society…not our hobbies, life partners, and new best friends. She chooses to not dedicate her entire existence to one of her roles. That’s her choice. If you choose otherwise, that’s your choice. As long as these kids are loved and guided, it’s all good. =)

Ashandra on

Gaias mom and Annie- I agree. In America there seems to be a certain enjoyment in martyring yourself for your child. Even on the comments on this site, women jump all over celebrities for caring about being thin and attractive after they give birth. You bet I’m going to care what I look like, even if I have a baby that day. I also think it’s unfair to husbands if their wives don’t try to be attractive, lose weight and have balanced priorities after their wives become mothers. I would never let myself go just to become a mother.

sinclair on

“Yet “motherhood has made what’s important clear”?!!? And she can’t support herself with her record deal and a new album due soon???!!! ”

Just Saying, are you familiar with music industry? Apparently not, because there are dozens of artists who came before Kelis that could tell you that they barely saw a red cent of what their albums brought in–SUCCESSFUL ALBUMS. Read up on how the biz works and perhaps you’ll rethink your statement. Yes, she has a new contract and an album coming out. But surely there are people on her ‘team’ that need to be paid–P.R., marketing, accountants, stylists, etc. I’m not pretending to know Kelis’s net worth or be her accountant, but album sales do not automatically translate into dollars for recording artists. This is well-known. Artists make a good portion of their money touring and some on licensed merchandise (if they go that route).

All that glitters ain’t gold, hun.

zetta69 on

I have never found Kelis to be particularly “deep” but I can appreciate what she means when she speaks of the child becoming a part of your life oppossed to changing yor life because of a child.I am surprised though that she speaks of now knowing what is important after all the nastiness around her divorce. Yes being with a faithful husband is important but mud slinging and money haggling not so much!

Just Saying on

Sinclair,

I live in LA and due to my job and my social circle I have ties to both the music and the movie industries. I won’t drop names and although I can’t say I know all there is to know about Kelis and her personal life, I do know some. I also know a bit about recording contracts and A&R and have heard talk about her deals and Nas’. So, yeah I know a little something and that’s why I made that comment.

As for the rest of her remarks, as well as the comments made by others, I agree that a woman/mother should have her own life and identity and that parents’ lives should not always be completely upended simply due to the arrival of a child.

However, again, if you’ve read anything about the Kelis/Nas drama, as well as some of her past statements and actions, then you would know that based on her actions and statements (as captured in the media), that she comes off a bit self centered….and that’s putting it nicely in my opinion….of which I am entitled.

Mary-Helen on

I have always found Kelis to be a bit self centered. I know there was some issue with her resenting Nas’s daughter from a previous relationship, I wonder if parenthood has changed her opinion on that. I also read she and Nas were trying to reconcile, which shocked me considering how she tried to clean him out completely and cut him out of Knight’s life until he “paid up” and gave her thousand dollar cribs, a round the clock nurse, a nanny and other stuff. Either way, I hope the drama has dissipated so that Knight can have a relationship with his mom, dad and older sis.

Catey on

Ashandra, Gaias mom and Annie- I couldn’t agree more with what you are saying. I live in Australia and often the comments on CBB rub me the wrong way. No one is here battling to be a perfect mum. You are just doing the best you can and if your kids are happy and healthy, people will leave you to it.

My life has changed since I had kids, but something things are just different. This weekend we are out at friend’s homes all weekend, where we will have a drink and eat while our kids all run around and keep themselves amused with the water pistols they had all gotten from other friends for Christmas.

I try and keep my kids lives strress free and if I am constrantly worrying about every single thing which they eat or always fixing them so their hair is sitting right (think Suri Cruise), this would be impossible.

Take a chill pill everyone!

CelebBabyLover on

Just Saying- Well, whether or not Kelis can support herself, Nas needs to contribute to the care of his child financally (as well as phyiscally, obviously) as well!

Brownsugar1313 on

Some of you people are so catty its disgusting!!!!

She looks like a grandmother??????

Take a look in the mirror before you all judge people’s physical appearance because you all could very well look like grannies to other people out there.

Good grief…ugh!!!!