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Teresa Strasser Declares: 'I'm Someone's Mom'

10/05/2009 at 01:30 PM ET
Landov

An elated — and exhausted! — Teresa Strasser took to her blog to give voice to the whirlwind of emotions accompany new motherhood. On her first day home with son Nathaniel James she writes,

“Sometimes it’s kind of nice to find yourself living a cliché, deliriously happy and deliriously tired mom. That’s me. Mom. I’m someone’s mom. He is my son.”

The 39-year-old former While You Were Out host admits that the concept was one she struggled to grasp beforehand. “For someone who wasn’t baby crazy, who didn’t really get babies at all, I do all the disgusting things like smell his head and take pictures of him incessantly,” she says, “and become convinced that I’m not biased at all, but that my baby actually is extra adorable with fantastic hair.”

Like most moms, however, Teresa also reveals that she harbored intense fears about baby boy’s well-being — right up until a doctor pronounced Nathaniel a “chunky monkey” and brought him over to meet mom.

“I started bawling right there on the table, tears pooling around my oxygen mask, trying not to choke on snot and shock and the weird mucus that collects when you’re on your back and pregnant,” she writes. “Until the second they brought him over to me and let me kiss his goopy, red face, I was convinced that setting up a crib, and buying a rug for his nursery and occasionally imagining he would be okay would all have cursed him, and that I would never, ever be lucky enough to get a real live healthy baby.”

“No matter how many tests told me otherwise and how often I saw his heartbeat, even moments before they removed him and I could hear his heart thudding steady and strong on the fetal heart monitor, I was sure this was all a big mistake and that something would be wrong and everyone had missed it.”

Click below to read about how Teresa felt about her c-section.

Her c-section — scheduled because of Nathaniel’s frank breech positioning in utero — was “gnarly,” and appears to have caught Teresa by surprise. “The recovery was and is more difficult than I imagined, the surgery was terrifying and maybe this is just me, but I think I even caught a 24-hour bout of PTSD,” she writes. “I know some people find them easy, I am not one of those people.”

As she recuperates, Teresa says she takes comfort in knowing that so many women have gone before her. “I know that the sensations I’m having now, the baby ‘high’ and the rubbing his velvety arms and the crying cause I can’t poop or sleep and the sad sack thoughts when I catch my bloated reflection and the surreal smacking myself over being his mom, and him not being in my stomach anymore, but instead sitting there in his bouncy seat,” she writes, “I know this has all been said and done and felt.”

“Maybe by you. Instead of that taking away from its value, today, somehow it seems to add to it. Instead of scoffing at the human experience, I’m just giving in.”

Nathaniel is Teresa’s son with husband Daniel Wachinski.

Source: TeresaStrasser.com

– Missy

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Showing 12 comments

meghan on

“I’m someone’s mom” What wonderful feeling.

Jurnee on

Congrats on your baby Teresa!! C-sections are major surgery and thank you for letting us know they can be quite difficult! Mine was very difficult & painful with an extended recovery, that sent me to physical therapy and also grappling with ptsd for a short time. Hope you are feeling all better and enjoying your baby!!

Shaya on

She really hits it on the head. I felt so much of the same thing with my daughter. Even 6 months later I sometimes look at her and can’t believe she’s mine. lol

MamaJ on

I felt exactly the same but it lasted unil my baby was 18 months old. The good thing for me was that when I had my second also C-section it was a totally different story, soooo much easier and not half as much of a shock to the system. Its so good to share these details so you know your not the only one.

Angela on

Maybe my second section would have been easier had my son been smaller, but it was much worse than my first. My daughter was 8 lb 10 oz and it took me about three days to recover after her, and my son was born almost 18 months later weighing 9 lb 11 oz and it took me a week to recover.

Joy on

I have had 2 C Sections. I am not a Dr. but it sounds like she has Post Partum Depression. I can never understand how someone uses the term ‘bloated’ after having a baby..

Joy on

My C Sections were painful afterward, too, but not after I took the pain medication. One child weighed 10 lbs.and 8 oz. The other weighed 9 lbs. and 8 oz. I have had two ‘regular’ births. I will take the C Sections ANY TIME over the v. births.. My last child was born nearly 15 years ago. C Sections are not so bad… The important thing is having a healthy baby…

Jurnee on

Joy, please qualify by saying “c-sections are not so bad – FOR ME”. Sometimes they ARE painful, difficult, and complicated. For some, pain meds don’t really do the trick. Glad they did for you. So please speak for yourself. It all depends on the person, baby’s size, health factors etc. The same goes for a “regular” birth. One sneeze can send the baby out, or a person can tear and be physically damaged. Each situation is individual!

Linney on

my c-section was a breeze. i was good as new in a couple days. i realize i was lucky and this isn’t exactly the norm. now he’s 3! such a big boy, i miss the “baby” days SO much!

Shelly on

I hope we get to see a picture of her little man soon. Her confessions of her terror that something was wrong took me back to my last pregnancy. We lost two babies between our live births and during my last pregnancy, I was prepared for the worst but prayed for the best. My son was a few weeks early and up until and past his due date, I just knew something would happen. But 8 1/2 years later, he’s going strong! Congrats to Teresa and her family.

Eri n on

I had a c-section 10 months ago. My daughter wasnt quite fully breech instead she was tucked with her head in my hip and her feet in my ribs. My c-section wasnt an all together horrible experience but it was kind of shocking. My feet were swollen two times their size afterwards, I got stretch marks within 24 hours of her birth, I ended up having to have hubby do EVERYTHING and still they let me out of the hospital not quite a full 48 hours later. I hope she gets to feeling better & I cant wait to see photos of the lil guy

kate on

Thank you thank you thank you! I,unfortunately had to have a c-section with my son, Adam a year ago. Thankfully there are women like you to make me understand that we are all part of a apprihensive sorority.Noone goes into this whole journey hoping to end in surgery, but, let’s be honest, thank God the option is there. Think of the alternative. It is horrifying! I am so glad to hear that you ( and so many other)s feel the same.We are but passengers on the ship that is motherhood. Bon voyage comerades! Bon voyage!

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