Around the Web…

Some stories for your Wednesday afternoon:

• Subway manners as written by a mom — New York Times
• Hollywood kids win big at Hamptons horse show — PEOPLE
• Glucose testing: What was it like? — CafeMom
• Test your vaccine knowledge! — lilSugar
• An 8-year-old saves his grandfather from drowning — ParentDish

Comments

When I was pregnant with my first I rode the train to work (I live in England). I can remember one trip home, I was about 8 months pregnant, and it was August. I didn’t get a seat and no one, male or female, offered me a seat. I stood for one stop and then an old man (he was at least 80) saw me and offered me his seat. I just couldn’t take his seat, he looked quite frail and it was wrong to ask him to stand, but still, no one else offered.
I don’t believe that it should just be men giving up their seats, anyone who is young and healthy should be offering seats to the elderly and pregnant women.

- Louise on September 2nd, 2009

Although not pregnant the same thing irks the hell out of me. Not to blow my own tumpet but at 21 I have been raised to know that in this order you should always give up your bus/train/tube seat…..Elderly person; Someone with cruthes or walking aid; Pregnant woman; Person with a child.

I am disgusted how many times recentley I see young people(or even more annoying people older than me but still young enough to be able to stand), who either don’t seem to realise it is good manners to offer your seat to someone who could benefit more or else they do realise and just don’t care. We travelled to London recently and unfortunatley from my experiences on The Tube what I have taken away from that city is that there is an abundance of ill mannered people who aren’t concerned with the needs of others there.

- Daisy.. on September 2nd, 2009

I always try to offer my seat to people that would probably need it more than me. But sadly, when I was pregnant and taking the bus home from work, no one would get up for me. They would just kinda give me this look…

It’s a shame that society has come to this.

- Robyn on September 2nd, 2009

I think we’ve all experienced rudeness on public transport. A couple of years ago, I was in London and about to get on the tube and this nasty woman pushed on and thought she had the right of way because she had a baby in a buggy with her. She was so rude and inconsiderate. This young woman of about 20 got knocked by her and ended up saying something to her about the rudeness. The woman snarked at the poor girl (she had a tiny frame, could easily have been hurt) that she had the right to get on first because of her child, until she realised literally everyone in the tube carriage was getting ready to applaud the young woman for having the guts to put the rude woman in her place. She sulked after that.

My point? That people shouldn’t use their children as an excuse for being rude and demanding. Me? Even if I have the children with me on my journey, I will get up and stand with them if a pregnant woman or an elderly person etc needs a seat. We should all do that, but people shouldn’t ever feel that it’s their God-given right to demand something that others are not obligated to offer.

I must stress though, this has been a minority experience, most of the times I have used the London Underground (and that’s a lot) I have seen nothing but kindness on the parts of all commuters. Guess I just caught someone on a bad day lol.

- Alex on September 2nd, 2009

I wanted to write about a positive Subway experience (to show that not all people are rude and others should learn from them!) I was riding the Metro (Subway for Washington DC) with my friend and I am not someone who rides very often. All of the seats were taken and all of the poles than stand vertically for you to hold onto were occupied as well. That left me to hold onto a ceiling railing. Which is great if you are tall enough but at 5’1” I’m standing on my tip toes to reach the thing and thus not staying balanced when we stop/do a slight turn/etc. A guy (probably late 20′s or so) saw my predicament and immediately offered me his seat. I was very grateful and felt a bit guilty because I am an able bodied person and was not pregnant at the time or anything. But still I thanked him and sat down. Of course had there been a person who needed the seat more than I did, I wouldn’t have taken it. But I really appreciated someone being kind and it’s something I remember months later.

- Laura on September 2nd, 2009

The author of this column mentions the MTA campaign strongly encouraging riders to give up their seats to the disabled. (Which of itself gave me a bit of a chuckle, because how many times have I heard women say “I’m pregnant not sick/crippled/mentally ill?”) I wonder if she is also aware of the MTA campaign strongly DISCOURAGING stroller use in the subways, because it is not only abominably unfair to your fellow riders, it also very unsafe for the child?

I am all for being polite and thoughtful to others, and I agree that there is less of that taking place nowadays than there used to be, but it goes both ways. I have to agree with the previous poster- being a mother is not an excuse for rudeness, nor, frankly, does it magically entitle you to special privileges.

Does the author think a pregnant woman is the only one who is “tired [and] wants to sit” on an evening rush hour subway? I for one am not going to judge, say, the schoolteacher who just spent 10 hours at work, most of them on his/her feet, for not giving up their seat.

- jessica on September 3rd, 2009

My experience with a parent who thought they were entitled didn’t happen on the subway, but waiting in line for the restroom. Her kid didn’t have to go, she did, but she was upset that no one was offering to let her go before them.

Generally I’ll usually give my seat to an elderly or disabled person or a pregnant women. But I try not to judge some people have chronic conditions that aren’t necessarily noticeable either and could need to sit down just as much.

- bre on September 3rd, 2009

I have never felt as invisible as when I was pregnant and travelling on a train. If I was standing, no-one would meet my eyes, noses would be buried deep into newspapers and the countryside outside the window suddenly became absolutely fascinating. Worse was when a man actually physically pushed me out of his way when I didn’t get on the train quickly enough for him (I had painful hips and stepping up was quite difficult), and a woman got snarky when I sat in a seat she had ear-marked for herself (she got a seat – just not that one!). Oh and there was the man who every morning would race to make sure he got on before me. I was once giving a woman with a buggy room and time to get onto a train when a very rude woman pushed past me and the mum, and when I challenged her on her rude behaviour she got lippy with me. I think that people in general have little respect for others now, and its not young people who are the worst offenders – I have also had the lovely experience of shopping trolley rage, when an elderly woman rammed her trolley into my ankles simply because I chosing an item from a shelf she wanted to get to. Apparently “excuse me” wasn’t in her vocabulary.

- Elaine on September 6th, 2009