No Tick-Tock of the Clock For Charlize Theron

Ferdaus Shamim/WireImage

The best part of the future for Charlize Theron? Never knowing what comes next! The 33-year-old Academy Award-winning actress tells Marie Claire UK that she and longtime partner Stuart Townsend “both want to be parents one day” – but the couple have “no idea when that will be.”

“I’ve always known that I wanted to be a mom. I love children. I’ve always loved children, but I’m not like, ‘Oh my God, I really must have kids right now.’ I’ve never felt this pressure urge that some biological clock is ticking.”

Not knowing what the future holds is a state of being Charlize says she likes. “Right now I’m really, really happy and I can’t really imagine how I’m going to feel in ten years, or what my circumstances are going to be,” she explains.

“I try not to think about it. All I know is, today is pretty good.”

Charlize and Stuart have been a couple since 2001.

Source: Marie Claire UK

– Missy

Comments

she kinda annoys me regarding having children as she just assumes that it will happen for her no matter what age she is beacause lets face it she is not getting any younger so if she is that sure she wants to be a mom she should stop being complacent and get on with it!
but i do love her as an actress!!

- sharon on May 2nd, 2009

i don’t know why that annoys you.that is her truth and how she feels.that can neither be wrong or right. she is well aware of how old she is.

- Cammie on May 2nd, 2009

All Sharon is saying is that women today do seem to think they can get pregnant at any age they want so they put it off like it’s just a lifestyle choice that’ll happen on their timetable. Sure some older moms succeed but many women have no choice but turn to adoption or surrogacy. If a woman doesn’t care where her children come from then age isn’t as much of a consideration although adoption can be harder for older people too. I just think women should be realistic about pregnancy. It’s not a given right from nature. Some women are infertile at a young age but many older women who might have concieved easily at 25 can’t at 35. That’s all Sharon was trying to point out, I believe.

- HollaUp on May 2nd, 2009

Stuart Townsend and Charlize Theron would have the most beautiful children!

I don’t understand people who can be so laid back about having children because it’s something I think about every single day. I’m 28 and I know I’m not getting any younger and I worry constantly about not finding the right partner or not being able to conceive – it clouds my judgments in other areas of my life. So I really respect Charlize’s view – eventhough I don’t understand it, because I wish it didn’t mean so much to me.

- girlJordan on May 2nd, 2009

Why does Charlize have to rush to have children? I’m sure she would make an excellent mother, but I admire that she is not allowing age and time to put pressure on her. Besides, even if biology stands in her way when she IS ready, the adoption window will certainly be open to her. I think Charlize is a total class act – her views are very refreshing! All the best to her!

- Sarah on May 2nd, 2009

I don’t normally comment, but feel the need today. Miss Theron and I are the same age, and feel the same way about starting a family. I realize that with aging comes more difficulty with conceiving (not always, but often). Knowing that, I still feel that it is best for me to wait. It is a PERSONAL decision. On that note, best wishes to Miss Theron and Mr. Townsend on the continued succcess of their relationship. May they live the way they want, free from pressure from fans and the film community.

- Andi on May 2nd, 2009

Sharon, I have that exact same feeling.
It seems that she assumes that she will have no problem with getting pregnant. She bugs me!

- Sandra on May 2nd, 2009

I think it’s great that Charlize is waiting until she feels ready to have children. Just because she’s 33 and “not getting any younger” doesn’t mean she should rush to have children. Yes, it’s more difficult as you get older but that’s obviously a risk she’s willing to take. She is happy with her life and where it’s going right now and I give her lots of credit to wait with this crazy Hollywood baby boom going on!

- Stephany on May 2nd, 2009

I really don’t understand how people can be bugged by her statements.Maybe I haven’t read the same interview but I fail to see where she “assumes” anything. Stating that what you like is “not knowing what the future holds ” isn’t very assuming to me.
Anyway she’s part of the Hollywood world where she’s front row to see actresses becoming moms in their late 30′s or early 40′s:Halle Berry, Jennifer Lopez, Marcia Cross, Nicole Kidman (I’m talking bio child here of course not forgetting her orlder kids), Salma Hayek whom wedding she attended,Naomi Watts,Madonna etc..
Maybe she’s not assuming anything and just is confident in the future, thinking if it’s possible for them it will be for her.
If a simple optimistic way of seeing the future annoys you or bugs you,don’t read her interviews.

- cécile on May 2nd, 2009

wasn’t she the one who made the comment about not wanting to become a beached whale? or something like that?

- heather on May 2nd, 2009

im sorry i didn’t mean to offend anyone it just seemed to me that she was taking her fertility for granted thats all and as my older sister was very similar to charlize and waited to have kids until she was mid 30′s she is finding it very hard to conceive and now regrets taking her fertility so much for granted and just assuming she will be able to do it on her own schedule!

- sharon on May 2nd, 2009

Stephany, I think the problem with some actresses proudly waiting is that they don’t seem to view waiting as risky. Because there have been high profile celebrities who conceived later in life, many younger women think waiting isn’t a big deal. Still there have also been some high profile celebrites who’ve spoken about their infertility. I don’t think a woman should rush into having children if she isn’t ready but she has to know carrying her own child is not an option out there forever. Some people just don’t want to adopt, don’t want to try surrogacy, or to use another woman’s eggs or whatever. While that’s their right to feel that way, carrying their own biological children is not their right. Ask any older woman struggling with fertility because her eggs are not as good as they might have been ten years earlier and see if their bodies waited for them to be ready? If Charlize is cool with that risk, then I say good for her for knowing herself so well and I applaud her for being so open to whatever life hands her.

- HollaUp on May 2nd, 2009

I don’t know why her comments are so “bugging” to people. She never said anything about JUST having biological children. Your biological clock doesn’t have to stop ticking when it comes to adoption. Perhaps she feels when the time is right she and Stuart could adopt a child. Atleast she’s not rushing into something for the sake of getting it done and over with! I wish I had her attitude about children cause I want them too and I’m only 25 but sill worry about the, “what if I don’t find the right person” or “what if I end up not being able to conceieve” I wish that I could just let it be and when the time is right it will happen. I am sure when the time is right Charlize will have a family and make a wonderful mother. I’ve seen many movies of hers where she’s played a mom and she takes on the role so naturally. Best of luck to them!

- JMO on May 2nd, 2009

When Charlize chooses to become a parent is entirely her choice so it really shouldn’t “bug” people. I’m sure she is well aware of age and how it pertains to fertility. I applaud her attitude and think it’s better than if she were constantly obsessed with the issue.

- Isa on May 2nd, 2009

Why should Charlize rush into having children because of the possibility that she may not get pregnant easily in the future? It’s a personal choice. You just have to do things when you’re ready. I’m sure she’s aware of the options to having kids in her life whether by carrying them herself, surrogacy, or adoption.

- Jas on May 2nd, 2009

not everyone wants to have kids, get over it. some people are just jealous that individuals their age or older still have freedom and exciting lives. don’t drag us down with your negativism

- Holly on May 2nd, 2009

i should clarify, so maybe she doesn’t want kids now. and maybe she won’t be able to as easily later, and you know what, maybe she doesn’t care as much as you all think. not everyone wants to be strapped down with kids by age 30.

- Holly on May 2nd, 2009

Here we go again. Whenever a celebrity states that she’s in no rush for kids or doesn’t want to have kids, this argument happens. Charlize Theron’s life choices have absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with any of us and anyone who’s personally offended by them needs to get over themselves.

- Jeanne on May 2nd, 2009

I was was born and grew up in South Africa where Charlize is from. Career women in South African tend to only start thinking about having kids in their early to mid thirties so I think that her attitude is pretty common considering where she is from.

- Jessie on May 2nd, 2009

Heather, that’s correct!

- Sandra on May 2nd, 2009

I was pregnant when she made that “beached whale” comment. I can’t stand her ever since. I feel it was a very insensitive comment to make.

- sara on May 2nd, 2009

i love charlize but i find these kind of comments are usually the defense mechanism of the thirty something woman who it hasn’t happened for yet.
i used to say i never felt the need to get married until my husband proposed and then i turned into bridezilla from hell according to friends. same with my daughter, i just didn’t want to tempt fate, but as soon as i saw the positive on the test i felt like my deepest wishes were coming through and this is what i had been waiting for my whole life.

- mazzie on May 2nd, 2009

Oh man! I can’t imagine a life without the constant nagging pull of my uterus. I’m 27 and have been married to my husband for 6 years. We’ve been waiting to start our family while I finished school and to feel financially ready. I think it’s fine if she wants to wait, I just cannot relate to her lack of drive to conceive. I’m a little jealous actually. I can relate to girlJordan’s feeling that it clouds her judgment at times. I wouldn’t mind feeling relaxed and unconcerned about when we’ll start our family.

- fergette on May 2nd, 2009

sounds like you need more stimulating hobbies/activities/friends in your life if all you think about it getting knocked up. your 20′s are for living it up!!

- Holly on May 2nd, 2009

I WANT TO BE A MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (: (and i’m only 18-year-old)

- lolita on May 2nd, 2009

i just cant wait!!!

- lolita on May 2nd, 2009

Just want to let Holly know that I have many hobbies and friends. My life is very fulfilling, I’m just mentioning that the physical desire to have a baby is very real for me. I’m not even in an incredible rush, it’ll probably be another year or two before we feel fully ready. Just wish I could find a way to quiet my body ’til then.

- fergette on May 2nd, 2009

Were you trying to be condescending Holly? Who says I have not ‘lived it up’ in my 20′s? I’m 28 now. I’ve done my partying and I’m ready to settle down. I’m sorry if that somehow offends you or you feel like my life isn’t full enough. I have many friends, and many hobbies. I’m happy that your life has gone exactly how you have planned it but there are some of us out there who want something more.

- girlJordan on May 2nd, 2009

Defense mechanism? Not everyone is eager to start a family in their 20′s. We all have different goals and beliefs. Some of us wish to become parents at a later age. It doesn’t mean that we grasp at some excuse because it isn’t happening for us. That kind of thinking is judgmental and unnecessary.

- Andi on May 2nd, 2009

Who says she’s taking anything for granted? She knows how old she is. Maybe she just didn’t want to answer the interviewers question, maybe she doesn’t want biological kids, or maybe she truly isn’t ready to be a parent. Quite frankly, I do not understand why her life choices are being so scrutinized. At least she knows she isn’t ready, which is far better than realizing that after you already have a child. Besides, she’s only 33!

- Sarah K. on May 2nd, 2009

“I just think women should be realistic about pregnancy. It’s not a given right from nature.”

HollaUp, Charlize didn’t say she wanted to be pregnant someday, she said she wanted to have kids some day.

- Sam on May 2nd, 2009

I can relate to not having that “nagging” feeling. I know I want kids eventually, but I’ve never felt like “OMG I need a baby now.” Of course, I’m only 23 so in 10 years I might feel differently.

- Anna on May 2nd, 2009

I think the problem is too many people take what celebrities say too personally and you need to really let stuff go.

I remember when Charlize made the “beached whale” comment and how much that story blew up of people feeling offended and I have to ask, why? Why do you care about how other women perceive pregnancy? She didn’t come out and say ALL pregnant woman look like beached whales, she said she didn’t want to look or feel like one. That’s her perogative on how she feels pregnancy may be for her! If you find you look beautiful during pregnancy then don’t worry about what someone else thinks about it! Enjoy your pregnancy and feel beautiful. But trust me NOT everyone does!

And secondly I don’t know why so many women get up in arms when a celeb like Racheael Ray or Kelly Clarkson (etc) say they don’t want kids and someone has to jump in with a, “oh they’ll change their mind or regret that decision later!” – no maybe they won’t and that’s on them to figure that out – not you! I find too many people these days have babies for all the wrong reasons but am I going to sit around and judge each one of them? Not really cause I don’t their circumstances. So what if Charlize waits and then can’t get pregnant? I’m sure she’s thought about it but as you can see she’s not concerned herself by worrying.. She isn’t going to have a baby just bc someone says she should or it’s time.

And finally Lolita – I think it’s wondeful you are 18 and ready to be a mommy. I was wanting to be one at 12!! But there is a difference in wanting something and being ready for something. Babies can’t be returned if your not satisfied…do yourself and your future child a favor by knowing when the time is right

- JMO on May 2nd, 2009

GirlJordan

I’m in your same boat. I’m 28 and my last serious relationship was 3 years ago-I though I would be DONE having kids by 30 and I’m 2 years away and not even close to getting married let alone having kids! I hear what you’re saying! It does bother me that celebs think that just because some people have kids in their late thirties and early forties that it’s a given that that will happen for them too. It’s not. Fertility declines starting at 35-you can’t magically produce more healthy eggs-As women we have to be aware of it. I feel like I have 7 more years before my chances start declining and that I have to be open to adoption or fostering a child. Just know that you aren’t the only one who feels that way-cause most of the friends my age (married or not) feel the same way.

- Tippi on May 2nd, 2009

I have always loved her as an actress, she is great! But its not like she has all the time in the world to have kids. At age 35 you are considered to be “advanced maternal age” and the chances for complications get much higher.

I am so opposite as her. I got married at 21 and 2 months later I was pregnant. I had my daughter at 22 and have always LOVED being a young mommy! I wouldnt have it any other way. I am 24 now and had my 2nd daughter 3 months ago. Being a mommy is the best and I cant see why you would want to postpone it for so long.

- Angelia on May 2nd, 2009

Women who have a specific “timeline” set for their life are generally huge turnoffs to men and will most likely be disappointed if everything does not line up at the right time. They are also more likely to be resentful to those who’s life decisions seem effortless or fancy-free. Just look at truuconfessions.org under the mom section, how many of them say complain and confess how they wish their lives were simple again because all they seem to bitch about are their kids and significant others.

- Holly on May 2nd, 2009

“Being a mommy is the best and I cant see why you would want to postpone it for so long.”

But, that’s best for you, not everyone. I’m your age and having kids is the farthest thing from my mind. I’m in law school and am not in a serious relationship. Settling down and having kids right now just doesn’t mesh well with my goals and lifestyle right now. And, those career goals are really important to me and I am more than satisfied with my life. I also think I would be a better parent for waiting until I’m ready emotionally and financially.

So, I understand where Charlize is coming from. Her life is full right now and maybe someday down the road she will feel the need to add children to it.

- Sarah K. on May 2nd, 2009

I see no problem with her waiting to have children.

I do know she and Stuart will have the most beautiful babies.

- Paige on May 2nd, 2009

Hi Sarah!
Yes you are right. I was just speaking from my own stand point that I feel being a mom is the most amazing this in the world and I dont understand how women her age could put off being a mom any longer. I know most people my age[24] think I am too young to be a mom. They think I should “live” first and experience life. Well I graduated from USC when I was 23 and own a house with my husband. I have traveled quite a bit and continue to travel more with my little ones in tow. Sorry I went off on a tangent there. But yes I know what you mean. I still cant believe people want to put off kids though.

- Angelia on May 2nd, 2009

surprise, some people don’t ever want kids! that doesn’t mean that we don’t find it fun to watch celebrity children, families, etc. And at the end of the day we still have total freedom. LOVELY

- Holly on May 2nd, 2009

Nowhere did she say she doesn’t want to be a mom, she just said it’s not a “intense need” thing. I’ve noticed Charlize Theron is a VERY laid back woman and probably sees it as an “if it happens, yay, if not, then it wasn’t meant to be” as opposed to a “life stops if I can’t conceive” thing. For all we know, she and Stuart have been trying and it hasn’t really happened for them and she’s taking a zen approach.

- Mary-Helen on May 2nd, 2009

I always thought that people who said they never want kids, were just using it as a cover up because they couldnt get pregnant or couldnt find a partner. Are there really people out there who NEVER want kids? And why?

- Angelia on May 2nd, 2009

I applaud her decision to do what is BEST FOR HER. Some of you are very judgemental by the way, emphasis on the VERY.

I happen to be 29 and have three beautiful little boys. I have been with my husband for 14 years, and married for 9 of those.

We had our first surprise birth control baby at 18, you know what, quite obviously it was for a reason and God thought I was ready to be a mommy since we were using two methods.

We are STILL happily married, STILL completely committed and have added two other children 8 and 4 to our blessed family, and we wouldn’t change a thing.

Who cares when you have children? As long as you are an adult and make an adult decision that is right for you, who are any of you to judge someone who has different preferences?

Have things been tough for us having children so young, sure! They are tough for ALL ages. There is NO right age to have children. My husband and I have both made ourselves very successful in obtaining our degrees and careers that we have wanted and have relied on each other for support to obtain our goals and along the way our children have not wanted for anything, and I mean anything.

So we “missed out” on our roaring 20′s according to a few of you. Matter of factly we had what many didn’t have. A family, a life together, a loving relationship and were obtaining our degrees to better ourselves for our child and any other children God willing to follow, why most people were out “exploring” themselves by drinking, partying, and carrying on with mutiple partners and being completely irresponsible.

IMHO, we have the perfect family and went the perfect path FOR US.

- Crystal on May 2nd, 2009

kids hamper “get-up-and-go” freedom. they hamper “me time” and NO, that is not being self-centered.

- Holly on May 2nd, 2009

I always thought that people who said they never want kids, were just using it as a cover up because they couldnt get pregnant or couldnt find a partner. Are there really people out there who NEVER want kids? And why?

Angelia, I never want kids because I know my personality means I wouldn’t be a good mommy. There’s no point bringing kids into the world if their childhood isn’t going to be a good one. If I was “accidentally” blessed with a child, it would be loved and cherished and I would do my best, but having children intentionally isn’t something that’s right for me to do.

Just a personal story but I hope it answers part of your question. There are other women who just don’t find the prospect of parenthood appealing, and that’s fine too. This comment has nothing to do with Charlize either, by the way, I’m just answering Angelia’s question specifically.

- Sophy on May 2nd, 2009

Yes, Angelia, there are really people out there that do not want children.

Having kids is not a life goal for many and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s not as if it’s a requirement. I know many women who’ve made the decision not to become mothers. My aunt, for example, has been married for the past 15 years and, at the age of 40, has no desire to start a family. Both she and her husband have successful careers and enjoy their life as is. She loves children; they’re just not for her.

Others who feel the same do so for a variety of reasons. Some like their freedom, others might not because of financial reasons, and some women simply have no desire to become mothers.

Parenting is incredibly hard and I applaud individuals who are responsible enough to realize that raising a child isn’t for them.

- Isa on May 2nd, 2009

Angelia, to answer you’re question as to why people don’t want kids- I don’t know about everyone else but my life is very full right now. Don’t get me wrong; I love kids. But, some of us just do other things with our lives that we find just as fulfilling like careers, school, friends, traveling, volunteering, etc. I know I simply cannot achieve my future goals while raising a child.

Besides, I’m one of those people who thinks that I am only young(ish) for a brief period and I want to take full advantage of that. I like that I can just go out at the drop of the hat, order take out every day, and take naps. I can do what I want when I want and I love that freedom. Maybe one day I’ll get tired of it and want to settle down, but not anytime soon.

- Sarah K. on May 2nd, 2009

“God willing to follow, why most people were out “exploring” themselves by drinking, partying, and carrying on with mutiple partners and being completely IRRESPONSIBLE.”

sounds like YOU are the one being judgemental and perhaps a little ENVIOUS? Very common defense mechanism of young mothers who use passive aggressive comments to compensate for their feelings.

And yes, I did have several “partners” in college and had I not explored my feelings and learned what I did and did not like I would not have met my future and current husband.

I find teenage romance and young marriage to be a bit skewed by A)religious dictations that frown on sex before marriage B) blinder-vision from being with your first bf and not wanting to breakup, so lets get married! or C) I need to hold on to this guy so lets have a baby

sorry, but you grow far too much as an individual, mentally, emotionally, and physically in your teens and early-mid twenties to really know who you are. this is backed up by plenty of psychiatry and psychology-backed research.

- Holly on May 2nd, 2009

Envious of what? I don’t find envy in getting drunk partying and sleeping with random people. I don’t envy anyone in fact. I was taught to be thankful for what I have and be happy for others for what they have.
Sorry not my slice of cheese and yes it is completely irresponsible to act in such manners. I find it to be better to be committed and share my body with only one man my whole life. This however is my opinion, not something I am trying to tell someone to do or not to do.

Judgemental? Hardly. I don’t spout what some should and not should be doing. In fact I clearly stated that it was her own personal choice and good for her. If she chooses to wait that is her personal choice, and mine was different, to each their own.

As for “teen marriage” I was 20 when I got married. I CHOSE not someone else chose for me, that was what I WANTED to do, not what was expected for me to do. I did not get married because I wanted to keep my high school boyfriend around, because I got pregnant or because of pre-marital relations. I got married because I LOVED my husband, and know my husband probably better then you know your husband to this day.

I did not trap my husband or think a baby would keep him with me. As I clearly stated we were in a committed relationship, as well as already engaged and ended up pregnant even with using birth control. Quite obviously this was for a reason.

What’s wrong, a little bit erked that my husband and I beat these so called odds? We married because we LOVED each other. Plain and simple, cut and dry. It is possible to be happy and in love and marry someone that you have known for a good deal of your life.
Sorry to tell you here dear I already know who I am, what I am, what I want in life and I have a perfect man and perfect family by my side. That man and the family that our love built is my his and our kids foundation and I don’t need any “studies” in pyschology to tell me something I already know about us or our family. PERIOD.

- Crystal on May 3rd, 2009

Good for you Charlize, wait, and do what you personally want to do for yourself!

- Crystal on May 3rd, 2009

JMO- I completely agree with you! My own mother has said that, when she was at the end of her pregnancy with me, she felt like…that’s right, a beached whale! Am I offended by that statement? Not at all! If that’s how she felt, then that’s how she felt.

I also agree with the posters who have pointed out that nowhere in this interview did she say that she specifically wants to be pregnant, just that she wants to be a mom someday. Perhaps she is considering adoption, or would be open to that possibility if she ends up unable to concieve. Or perhaps she and Stuart HAVE been trying, but are struggling with infertility and (very understandbly!) don’t want to broadcast that fact to the entire world!

- CelebBabyLover on May 3rd, 2009

My husband knew me tens times better than yours knew you before he married you because we lived together for 2 years before getting engaged, an another year together while engaged. you really learn A LOT about people this way.

an oh yes, one CAN be responsible and have different sexual partners throughout their young adult life, lots of smart choices, STD testing, HIV tests, condoms, pill, KNOWing the person somewhat. and the always favorite abortion for all!! for whenever and whatever the mother wants. We live in the land of the free, freedom of speech, freedom of CHOICE. ROE v WADE.

I am the most responsible person I know, and I had my share of hayday fun at the #1 party school in the country (graduated and went on to get my masters). So to me, it sounds like YOU are the irresponsible one. not allowing yourself/your individual YOU-NESS to blossom from post-high school to college like most young adults should. It’s HEALTHY

- Holly on May 3rd, 2009

“I got married because I LOVED my husband, and know my husband probably better then you know your husband to this day.”

Wow, and you really think you’re non-judgmental?
And why is it “irresponsible” if someone chooses to NOT only have one man in her life and do what she wants when she is college-age? As long as she doesnt hurt an outsider, what is it to you and how is that irresponsible?
Sorry, but not buying that you’re not envious. In fact, your defensiveness proves otherwise as well as this “my man and family are perfect”. Last time I checked, no one was perfect, lol

- Cat on May 3rd, 2009

Wow people. She’s 33, not 43! Yes, women’s fertility starts to decline in their 30s but it’s not like her ovaries are turning to dust! A lot can happen in a year or two.
I have a feeling she’ll get pregnant around 35. At least I’d love to see her pregnant since she and Stuart will have gorgeous babies. That man is so yummy.

- Lorus on May 3rd, 2009

Sorry, but I just had to jump in here. These arguments are getting ridiculous. I was mildly entertained until I read a line that Crystal wrote, which stated that, “I got married because I LOVED my husband, and know my husband probably better than you know your husband to this day” to another poster named Holly. Crystal, I think it’s appalling to assume that you know the magnitude of someone else’s love and commitment. Were you there when Holly said her vows to her husband? Are you privy to the inner workings of their relationship? We’re all happy that you’re happy, but seriously…love isn’t a contest, and the “amount” that you love and know somebody is relative to your unique situation. You’re not the winner in any contest here because you love and know your husband. I could just as easily say that I know my husband better than you know yours. There is no way to measure that, it would be pointless, and nobody goes home with a gold star at the end of the day. Comparing one relationship with another is like comparing apples and oranges, so let’s stop.

- Amanda on May 3rd, 2009

Wow, I read this article properly today and thought, ” Ooops” when she said, ” I’ve never felt this pressure urge that some biological clock is ticking.” because I knew some people would be sensitive about that. However, having read all those comments on here, I was very amused. I was only 19 when I had Pierre, and I was not ready to have him, but now he is 4 years old, I have an urge to have another child and am in the process of trying with my new fiance. I agree with some of you- fertility is not something I take for granted especially seeing one of my best friends struggling for years to have a baby so I can see your point there. Having said that, Charlize shouldn’t feel pressurized to have children, it should be when both she and her boyfriend feel ready and are committed to being parents. So let’s wish her well, and a healthy, happy life (with children, should she have them).

- babyboopie on May 3rd, 2009

It has never occured to the so annoyed and bugged people that, answering to a reporter from a magazine,a person whom we can imagine isn’t one of her intimates, she chose to remain vague on her intentions on purpose.Why sharing your personal agenda for your personal life with strangers? I can only imagine a high profile actress like her saying:”oh, yes Stuart and definitely plan a pregnancy for next year” or”I plan to get pregnant before 35″. The woman would never wear a loose top or gain a few pounds without everyone starting the guess game or the babybump watch.She maybe has this crazy idea that her plans ,the real ones, are better shared with her loved ones (not people paid by Marie Claire or curious people like us).
And from the tone of certain comments, it appears that some people would be happy to see her endure fertility problems just to prove their point,judgemental people are so glad when they can spit “I told it” or “it serves her right”.
Same comments were made about Ellen Pompeo, the you’re not getting any younger style or just because you have it all now doesn’t mean it will always be the case type (you could feel their hope for a problem). They must be so crushed now. It’s human I guess,hoping that someone can’t have it all, but it’s sad.

- cécile on May 3rd, 2009

Hey, Sam, I said if she didn’t care if she couldn’t have biological children then it wasn’t a problem if she waited. If she wants biological children that she can carry herself, then it could be a problem. Can you read? I also said some people don’t want to adopt or don’t like surrogacy. For those women, their options are more limited. And while they are free to feel that way about adoption or surrogacy, they need to understand they don’t have a right to carry their own children. Ask any infertile woman if she has a right to carry her child and see if nature just bends to her will? It isn’t something we can take for granted. As long as a woman is open to whatever life brings her, then setting her own timetable is fine. I’m living in the real world. You’re living in your head or in the fantasy that feminists have created for young women. We can’t have whatever we want when we want it. Life is about choices and living with the consequences. If Charlize is cool with that, then good for her.

- HollaUp on May 3rd, 2009

About the beached whale comment, I am not bragging here when I say I looked adorable pregnant. I had a small little tummy and didnt gain weight any where else. I gained just 20 pounds and it was all baby. I think when you moms are young and pregnant they tend to not gain as much weight and generally look cuter then older moms do.

- Angelia on May 3rd, 2009

oh really? then explain kate hudson who gained like 70 pounds or ashlee simpson who got huge. what a generalization you just made about being young and looking “cuter”/thinner pregnant

- Holly on May 3rd, 2009

I didnt see what either of them looked like pregnant. I am just thinking about friends and people that I know. Older people can look cute too… but they dont have that youthful glow about them and sometimes end up looking frumpy.

- Angelia on May 3rd, 2009

What exactly did she say about being a beached whale? She doesn’t strike me as that type at all, surely she was joking? Didn’t she gain a ton of weight for a role? I’ve always liked her, she seems really down to earth and she’s gorgeous.

- jessica on May 3rd, 2009

but at least they had time to enjoy their youthful bodies before they became ravaged with stretch marks, saggy boobs, and cellulite everywhere

- Holly on May 3rd, 2009

look at Jessica Alba, Ashlee Simpson, Kate Hudson, Reese Witherspoon does it loook like they have messed up bodies from pregnancy? Kate Hudson wears tiny bikinis and looks great! Not everyone gets stretch marks you know. I never did.

- Angelia on May 3rd, 2009

Angelia as those may be your opinions I think your generalizing a whole lot of women who would probably say they didn’t look “frumpy” pregnant! Working in a daycare setting for 10 years I have seen MANY beautiful pregnant women young and old. I have also seen MANY young one’s look very large, tired, and worn down by pregnancy! It just depends on the person and how they carry. My friend who is 36 had a baby last year (not sure if you consider that “old” or not) but she looked amazing! My now 26 yr old cousin is pregnant and not due until July and looks like she s ready to pop any day! I wouldn’t go around assuming that just because your older means your not going to have that
pregnancy “glow”.

Jessica – This was Charlize’s quote

“Getting pregnant doesn’t excite me, but having kids does. I know I’ll be a mother someday. It’s just that…I don’t really want to look like a whale, you know? But I’m sure the idea of something growing inside you is pretty powerful.”

And I have to say from my personal stand point, pregnancy doesn’t excite me excite me either and the one reason I fear about getting pregnant is gaining wait and not looking like me! Charlize didn’t say that ALL woman look like whales but I can see how it can be misconstrued. What I took from it is that she’d love to have a child but image wise she feels like she just doesn’t wan to get fat. I think people need to worry about themselves and how they feel pregnant and not care what others think cause NOT everyone really gets excited about having their body completely taken over by someone else!!!!

- JMO on May 3rd, 2009

I love her attitude towards having a child.

- Liv on May 3rd, 2009

Oh the pressure. I went through that about having children.. i gave up worrying about it. It is so personal. I totally understand that the women who understand how hard it can be to conceive and then carry and have a healthy baby feel annoyed when someone sounds easy going about having children at Charlize’s age..BUT you know she is ok on adopting I believe if she wants a family..not sure but I read it somewhere i think. I wish they would just have one and somehow manage their lives anyway and I would offer to babysit~! Lets stop talking about how we feel about what Charlize says. Be assured i have rubbed it in, that they don’t waste time. I also think they are so happy that if they miss out on kids they will still be happy..that’s the type of happiness i believe they have..not the type where you are with the guy/gal and really “have to have a child”..and break up because one won’t have it.Charlize had to have healing and growing and Stuart has been that for her.. a good stable man. I hope they have one..they will be wonderful parents~! God Bless them..they are so fun and beautiful.I imagine a very happy child. I could make a link to baby section on my webpage~!

- Lara99 on May 3rd, 2009

I know it’s hard for those of you out there who are struggling with fertility, but please don’t take it so personally every time a celebrity says she’s in no hurry to have kids.

Keep in mind that they might be playing the diplomacy card. Maybe they don’t actually want to have kids that badly (but are aware of the fact that the public wants them to want kids). Maybe they are struggling with their own fertility issues. Maybe they really secretly love the idea of adopting when they are older and have slowed down a bit.

Regardless, I don’t think celebrities are trying to make you feel bad when they are fielding personal questions from the press.

- theyearofasking on May 3rd, 2009

“Sorry, but I just had to jump in here. These arguments are getting ridiculous. I was mildly entertained until I read a line that Crystal wrote, which stated that, “I got married because I LOVED my husband, and know my husband probably better than you know your husband to this day” to another poster named Holly. Crystal, I think it’s appalling to assume that you know the magnitude of someone else’s love and commitment. Were you there when Holly said her vows to her husband? Are you privy to the inner workings of their relationship? We’re all happy that you’re happy, but seriously…love isn’t a contest, and the “amount” that you love and know somebody is relative to your unique situation. You’re not the winner in any contest here because you love and know your husband. I could just as easily say that I know my husband better than you know yours. There is no way to measure that, it would be pointless, and nobody goes home with a gold star at the end of the day. Comparing one relationship with another is like comparing apples and oranges, so let’s stop.”

Am I not allowed to defend myself? If she is going to say that I got married for all the wrong reasons and basically tell me I got married because I either trapped my husband, was pregnant and had no choice or the choice was made for me then darn straight I am going to defend myself. That is an ultimate slap in the face to everyone that chose to marry young. To assume that you know and throw idiological “pyschological” testing into the mix as well to try and prove a point.
She is the one that has no insight the relationship me and my husband share yet she is blasting my marriage because I got married young.

I stated clearly that those preferences I chose to share my body with one man was my choice and not my slice of cheese to do the latter and sleep with multiple partners, as well as that is my opinion and even if I don’t agree with the latter I am not someone who is going to judge someone else for doing so. However this poster Holly, blasted my marriage right off the bat because I didn’t find any appeal in living up my 20′s and sharing multiple partners and partying and drinking.

I agree this thread is about Charlize, which in my previous postings clearly state that I am happy she is waiting to do what is right for her. I started young, she decided to wait. To each their own. In the long run here, she is making the best decision for HER.

- Crystal on May 3rd, 2009

Angelia you really think those girls didn’t get stretch marks?? Celebrities have spray tans, fraxel lasers and body makeup. May I also add stretch marks fade over time. Cindy Crawford looks great in a bikini too but if you look closely you can see her stretchmarks. That aside your other comments are too silly to respond to.

- Bieta on May 3rd, 2009

I don’t know why people take these interviews so seriously. If I were a celebrity I would make up so much stuff. Maybe she doesn’t feel ready, but she can wake up tomorrow and decide she wants a kid. Or she could have for all you know placed adoption papers. I think applauding her is just as stupid as criticizing. I can however related to her and I think a lot of young women do. I don’t really see what having a lot of SEX with a lot of people helps a person grow. Anymore than being with the same man from when you were a teenager. C’est la vie.

- anon on May 3rd, 2009

Um. For crying out loud, Ms. Theron might not even care if her future children are adopted, for all we know…in which case, time most certainly IS on her side.

So what if she postpones having children for an inordinate amount of time? I mean, is it really anyone’s concern if she’s able to conceive one day or not? I’d venture to guess Charlize is smart enough to know that there are zero guarantees in life. Thank goodness she’s just enjoying life and being true to herself, I say.

Is it really that necessary to critique another person’s reproductive choices? Aren’t there bigger, more pressing issues today? LOL

- shidley on May 3rd, 2009

Some people do NOT get stretch marks though! I seriously did not get one. If you gain weight slow and steady there is a good chance you wont get any.

- Angelia on May 3rd, 2009

well, i’m 39 and i never had children. It was a personal choice. Now,even if i change my mind it’s out of the question! I was diagnosed with fibroid tumors and i’m getting a hysterectomy in 2 weeks!

- g!na on May 4th, 2009

cecile- ITA! My parents struggled with infertility before finally being able to have kids, and after hearing the h**l they went through (including having to endure classic comments such as “When are you going to have kids?” or “When are you going to start a family?” The latter one is the worst, IMO, as it’s basically saying that you aren’t a family unless you have kids, which certainly isn’t true!), infertility is something that I don’t, nor will I ever, wish on anyone!

Crystal- I DO think you were being a bit too harsh when you claimed that you know your husband better than Holly knows hers. I disagree with her responses to you as much as you do, but there’s no need to be nasty back to her.

That said, I DO agree with what you said about being in a monogamus relationship. I don’t think people who have multiple partners (either at the same time or within close proximity to each other) are horrible people, nor do I consider doing so to be irrepsonible, especially if they’re using proper precautions, such as condoms and/or pills.

However, I personally believe that intimate relationships (if you know what I mean!) should be between only two people: a husband and a wife (yes, I’m also rather old-fashioned in that I believe that people should save themselves for marriage!).

Again, I have understand that different people have different views, and I’m not going to criticize people for doing something I don’t agree with. All I’m saying is that having a non-monogamus relationship (along with doing the deed before marriage), is something I personally don’t agree with and don’t choose to do.

- CelebBabyLover on May 4th, 2009

I conceived my first month off of the pill after having been on it for 11 years. I will be 31 this year. So, not everyone trying to conceive in their 30′s has problems – trust me!

- ErykaWynter on May 4th, 2009

Angelia, that is only partially true. Stretch marks are a response to a change in hormones levels not just weight gain. Hence why body builders, teens and pregnant women get them. I get really irritated when people try and act like they’ve got super control over what their bodies do, especially during a time like pregnancy.

- anon on May 4th, 2009

anon I was wondering if you have any kids? I have a 3 year old and a 3 month old and I am 24 years old. I did not get a single stretch mark, not even the hint of something that could be a stretch mark. So not everyone gets them. Most of my friends didnt get any either.

- Angelia on May 4th, 2009

Angelia, what does having a child have to do with anything? Look it up on webmd or ask any dermatologist. Slower weight gain may lessen your chance for stretch marks but genetics and hormone levels are a bigger determining factor. I’m 21, have no kids(and no stretchmarks). I know a woman who gained 80lbs with triplets and no stretchmarks. I know a woman who gained 15(no joke) and has them all on her hips and rear. I don’t care whether you or your friends got any(and 80 percent of girls get them way before pregnancy during a thing called puberty). I don’t care what you got this isn’t in anyway about YOU. I’m just irritated by your ludicrous young mothers look better pregnant comments and your failed attempt to back it up with celebrities(some who’ve admitted to looking awful post pregnancy. This supposed “youthful glow”. Its something I see and hear a lot with young moms. Trying to down older moms. Give it up,seriously nobody cares.

- Anon on May 4th, 2009

IMO young moms look better and I have always felt that way. When I see an old pregnant lady I literally cringe at the site. It just doesnt look right… wrinkles, gray hairs and a baby belly is not cute!
BTW I will add a few other young moms who look good, Nicole Richie, Christina A, Brittney Spears.

- Angelia on May 4th, 2009

It could very well be your opinion, but your opinion is stupid. I really try to avoid saying things like that, because everyone has a right to an opinion but I really must say your opinion is the most vapid, nonsensical and asinine one I’ve ever encountered. I have no other choice but to assume its because the comment is coming from an immature and illogical person. Nicole Richie was not a ‘young’ mom neither was Aguilera both of them became moms at 27 the average in the U.S being about 24. Once again, don’t down other people to make yourself feel better about your own life choices. I don’t even know why I’m partaking in this conversation, so i’ll end it right here because you clearly do not get it.

- anon on May 4th, 2009

Angelia, I’ve stood by and read your quite honestly stupid comments on both this and the Julie Chen story and I can no longer take it. Those “older moms?” They’re most likely much more well-educated, much more financially stable, in longer-lasting and stronger relationships and much better prepared to handle motherhood. I myself was a young mom at 22, seven months pregnant on my college graduation day. As much as I love being a mother and adore my girls (I’m now 33 and have two), I would give anything to go back and change the path my life has taken. My husband and I both agree that we felt rushed into our marriage-we had only just gotten engaged when we found out I was expecting and we moved the marriage up so we wouldn’t be unwed parents. I had to cancel my semester abroad because I found out I was pregnant. I never had the chance to live alone. I still live just outside the same small town I grew up in. I never had time to get to know myself when it was just me, or just me and my husband. These are all things that now, at 33, I can look back and admit to myself that I wish had been different. I am very happy with how my life is now, but if I’m truly honest with myself I wish things with the baby and marriage had happened 3-5 years later. You are 24 with a 3 month old and a 3 year old? That, to me, is very young and your immaturity is shining through your posts. Let’s hope you raise your children with integrity and keep your judgmental nature to yourself.

- April on May 4th, 2009

April and Anon, I couldn’t have said it any better myself.

Angelia, your comments have become increasingly vain, illogical, and plain silly. You pride yourself on being a mother of two by the time you’re 24? Well, congratulations. But, who are you to pass judgment on those who choose to build a stable life for themselves before taking the responsibility of parenthood? You cringe at the sight of middle-aged pregnant woman? Really? Well, guess what- I cringe at the thought of your narrow-mindedness and vanity.

I wonder if you even realize that having a child is more than just “looking cute” when you’re pregnant. That has got to be the most inane thing I have ever heard. Should we all just have babies before we can rent cars so that we can look cute? I truly hope that you’re able to teach your daughters that beauty is more than skin deep.

Just to clarify, I have no problem with women having children young and I do not doubt their abilities. But, Angelia’s comments are over the top and her immaturity shines through.

- Sarah K. on May 4th, 2009

Sorry if I have offended people. To tell you the truth the reason I have been saying rude things about older women having kids is because they always pass judgement on me and have said many rude and hurtful things. I have been told things like “you should have waited, you are far too young to be a mom” ” You threw away the best years of your life” “Your just a baby having babies” and those comments hurt. So thats what my problem is too tell you the truth.

- Angelia on May 4th, 2009

So let me get this straight because a “few” people have offended you by saying you were too young to have children your now going to generalize a whole population of women? Yea cause that makes a lot of sense!!

First and foremost I’m sorry you are ridiculed about having children young. But 21 is not that young….trying being 16 or 17. That’s a bit less ideal. I don’t know your situation but perhaps people have told you should wait for other reasons which I won’t say bc like I said I don’t know you. But also if it bothers you that much all you need to do when someone confronts you about being a young mom is to say, ‘yes well I made my choice and I have no regrets” but to simply come and bash “older” mothers for their choice or non choice of becoming pregnant at an older age is simply immature. I am not older but if I was and I happened to be pregnant right now I’d find you to be very offensive. It’s sad we even have people out there who would look at a pregnant women and think she looks disgusting….all pregnant women at any age is beautiful. The ability for one to even carry a child is miraculous and most don’t care all too much about what you or anyone thinks about how they look.

And to add to you so called “theory” my mom was 24 and gained 75lbs with me and I was one month preterm! She didn’t find pregnancy at her young age to be all that flattering on her body but in the end despite all that weight she gained at her very tender age she didn’t have any stretch marks to show for it. Just a healthy baby (me) which was what mattered.
I really hope you don’t instill these same values in your own childrne. God forbit they decide to wait until they are 30 to have children….I’d hate to know what you would think of them then!

- JMO on May 5th, 2009

JMO, good on you, couldn’t agree more! Don’t think it’s wise waiting much past 35 and then wonder why it doesn’t happen, not ideal, but who knows someone’s situation, may want a stable relationship/partner to bring baby into world and the way it worked out for them and wanted to be a younger mum, but no need to bash older mums for waiting! I think it’s better to have a life of your own first, other than your kids, as life’s never the same again afterwards, much as they’re great. Am glad I went overseas and lived in London a few years while child-free! I went overseas for a few years in mid 20′s and much as I love our kids can’t imagine having had kids them, there are other things in life going on too, am glad I travelled and saw some of the world and yes can do it if younger mum and kids are grown and gone but nice to do travel thing while younger and energy to do and see things, so no regrets having my kids in early-mid 30′s! Didn’t want to have them over 35 ideally due to risks but had son at 32 and daughter just on 36, a month after 36th b’day which wasn’t too bad by today’s standards!, although ideally would’ve likedc ot have been under say 33/34 when I’d had them both but met my husband at 29 so either way was going to be in our 30′s anyhow…

- sam and freya's mum on May 9th, 2009