Tori Spelling Dishes on Belly Flab, and More

04/16/2009 at 06:00 PM ET
Tori Spelling
Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic

It’s the moment every new mom dreads. A few weeks or months postpartum, and a stranger offers up congratulations for a baby-on-the-way who has already arrived! Although she swiftly returned to pre-baby form after welcoming son Liam Aaron, 2, and daughter Stella Doreen, 10-months, Tori Spelling says that even she has fallen victim to this nightmarish scenario.

“It just happens. It’s always when you think that you’ve lost a little of the baby weight that someone steps in grabs a handful of a now sans baby soft belly and asks the inevitable ‘When are you due?’ It happened to me quite a bit after both babies.”

In a revealing new interview with Mommy Track’d, the 35-year-old 90210 star makes it abundantly clear that there’s little she isn’t willing to discuss when it comes to motherhood. Before welcoming Liam in 2007, Tori admitted she was “paranoid” about having a bowel movement during a vaginal delivery; The issue was mooted when she needed a c-section but she says she wouldn’t have hidden anything from husband Dean McDermott had things turned out differently. “Luckily Dean and I share everything, so YES…I would have asked him to check to see if I had done the deed!” Speaking of the latter, there’s been plenty to go ’round since Stella arrived on the scene! “Having two babies so young…[it] is a lot of work,” she notes, adding:

“Its a lot of POOP! But its so rewarding to see them begin to interact and start to play together. I’m lucky that I have such a hands on husband. Dean is amazing! Patsy our baby nurse is still with us and will be with us till June. Its a lot more gear with two [kids] and we eat a lot more meals in but we love every moment of it.”

Click below to read about Tori’s “very pleasant” surprise.

Stella was “a very pleasant surprise” for the couple, who always planned on having more children. “We just figured the time was right ’cause fate stepped in and brought us Stella,” Tori says. Although she was at ease with the notion having two children under two, two pregnancies back-to-back put Tori — a self-described “bundle of nerves riddled with irrational fears — to the test.

“With my 2nd pregnancy I had most of the same fears with a slew of fun new ones added to the mix. Thank goodness I’m friends with my OB/GYN Dr. Jason Rothbart ’cause he kept me sane. I must have texted him a million times during both pregnancies.”

Between 90210, the new season of Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood, the release of her book Mommywood and a children’s clothing line in the works, free time is in short supply for Tori. When she is able to carve out the “rare no work moment” she says she prefers a quiet night at home over a night out on the town. “We like to cook, and watch movies together (in fact I think to date I’ve seen the animated feature CARS 22 times), go biking together, on walks, go to the park, and just BE,” she says. With so many irons in the fire, Tori shows no signs of slowing down. She adds,

“Sometimes I do envision just being a stay at home mom but not working isn’t an option for me currently. I need to work to support my family.”

Source: Mommy Track’d

— Missy

FILED UNDER: Bodywatch , News , Parenting

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XOXO on

I dont want to get anyone mad, but I have a question: does Dean work? I have only seen him on the show with Tori, but on no movies or anything Or is Tori the only one working and Dean takes care of the babies?

Stella and Liam are gorgeous!

gianna on

She is a busy lady, she sure is a lot like her dad, always doing something and always working. I just got her book, and can’t wait to read it. The pictures are so cute too. I loved her first book, was a huge fan of the original as well as the new 90210 show, and love her reality show, so it’s safe to say i’m a fan of her’s lol. I never met her personally but my friend did, and said tori along with alyssa milano and drew barrymore were the nicest celebs she ever met.

gianna on

Forget to mention, both her babies are super cute.

Ryo on

Do people still really ask “when are you due?” And then grab your stomach? That seems like such a personal thing to just come out and ask a stranger! I couldn’t do it anyway.

Sadie on

If Tori enjoys being a working Mom then more power to her, so I’m certainly not criticizing her for being a working Mom. But I don’t buy the excuse that she has to work to support her family. She just recently bought a house worth several million, coming just a few months after moving into a smaller home. If she hadn’t bought the mansion and had stayed in her smaller house and didn’t live such an extravagent lifestyle then she could stay home.

I’m sure she’s made plenty of money off her reality show, DVD releases from the show, jewelry line, bestsellar, 90210 appearances and all of that that she could become a stay-at-home mom if she wanted to. She just wouldn’t be able to do it while living in a mansion, with staff, while wearing designer clothes. At that’s fine if she doesn’t want to give up that lifestyle and wants to keep working, but it’s so disingenous to pretend like she’s just struggling to support her family when what she’s really doing is working to give her family a very lavish lifestyle.

babyboopie on

I do understand her sentiment about needing to work to support her family but still, she does need some time out to be with her family, seeing she can afford it.

Sadie on

“I dont want to get anyone mad, but I have a question: does Dean work?”

During season 3 of their reality show he went to Canada to film a movie, and I think he may have done another TV movie during the course of their marriage somewhere. And during one of the seasons of their show he was talking about doing voice-over work. So I think he does work here and there.

Angi on

I just adore her and her family. She is hard working ,just like her dad. She and her husband seem like a perfect fit and it’s obvious that she would loves her kids with everything she has.

Sarah K. on

Sadie, I can’t believe I’m about to take Tori’s side (haha), but I think her statement about working to support the family is ok. It’s not like she grew up in a middle-class family that sent her to public schools and she had to work at the mall. She was born into a life of privilege. She is probably accustomed to the finer things in life. She has NO idea what it means to be anything but wealthy. Sure, she could stop working and live a more modest lifestyle- but after spending her entire life living luxuriously that would be really hard.

Besides, it’s not about what we think is sufficient to live on. That’s a personal choice, totally subjective. For example, you may think that your children should go private school but I might think that’s a complete waste of money. So, if she thinks that she really needs the multi-million dollar house and she’s willing to work for it, I have no problem.

Sadie on

SarahK: I don’t care if Tori was raised in the biggest house in the world. It is still completely 100% false for her to say she has to work to support her family. She is working to support her family in a lavish lifestyle. And as I already said in my previous post, if she wants to have a lavish lifestyle than that is certainly her choice.

I wasn’t debating whether she should give up her lavish lifestyle or not. I also wasn’t trying to dictate what amount of money Tori should live on. What I was saying is that she can afford to be a SAHM. It’s false for her to say she can’t.

I don’t personally care if people want to live in huge houses or small ones, have a full staff or none at all, work or be SAHM. That’s not the issue. The issue is that she’s presenting it as if working is something that she HAS to do, and it’s not. It’s something that she CHOOSES to do because she wants to live a certain kind of lifestyle. I would have a lot more respect for her if she would be honest about that and stop acting as if she’s struggling to support her family.

Stephany on

Sarah K, I have to disagree. While, in actuality, it IS a personal choice, Tori says herself, “Sometimes I do envision just being a stay at home mom but not working isn’t an option for me currently. I need to work to support my family.”

I do this not working is an option for her. She has made enough money to live on and support her family – but maybe not to the lavish lifestyle extent (as Sadie as saying) that she wants. I am all for working mothers. I have no problem with that at all. I just don’t like the way that comment was worded. Obviously, she works because she loves what she does. I know plenty of mothers who NEED to work to support their children. Tori is definitely not one of those.

Sam on

“It’s something that she CHOOSES to do because she wants to live a certain kind of lifestyle.”

Maybe she doesn’t know how to live any other way. I admit I was taken aback by her statement that she needs to work to support her family, but maybe she really CAN’T live a less luxurious lifestyle. Some people just don’t know how/aren’t capable of it.

Sadie on

“Maybe she doesn’t know how to live any other way. I admit I was taken aback by her statement that she needs to work to support her family, but maybe she really CAN’T live a less luxurious lifestyle. Some people just don’t know how/aren’t capable of it.”

You’re certainly not giving Tori much credit there. To read some of the comments in this thread you would think Tori was a three year old child who has no control over her actions or life. Well that simply isn’t the case. It doesn’t matter if she grew up knowing how to live frugally or not – she is an adult now and can figure it out. Lots of people aren’t taught valuable things as a child, that’s no excuse for not figuring it out once you are an adult. If my parents raised me to be mean to people would that excuse me treating people badly when I’m 35? If my parents raised me to lie would that make is justified to spend my whole adult life doing the same? No it wouldn’t. Because once we are adults we are all responsible for our actions, and we are all capable of doing better than what we did when we were growing up. Saying that she doesn’t know any better is a poor excuse when we’re talking about a grown woman who is in her 30’s.

Bieta on

Lol! Some people aren’t capable of handling a non-luxurious lifestyle? Well god takes care of children and fools.

Honestly, I don’t see the appeal of tori spelling. Is she an actress? I won’t pretend as if I’m paying super loads of attention to her, but it seems like lately she’s just been hawking out her mother status. I dunno, it seems like with certain celebrities whe they have a baby it just opens up a whole new vehicle they can brand. I started off ignoring posts on her cause they didn’t really interest me, but it seems like a post a day is dedicated to her.

fergette on

Honestly I don’t think Tori’s lifestyle is that lavish. Compared to other celebrities she has a very modest home and dresses her kids in Target clothes. I believe her when she says she needs to work in order to support her family. They must live where they do if she’s going to make a living in the industry and that costs some money.

Plus, I’m with those of you who are saying who are we to impose a specific standard of living on them? As long as they are paying their bills and being responsible about their use of credit then more power to them to choose to live in Hollywood. It’s like some of you wouldn’t be satisfied until she was hardly feeding her kids and keeping a roof over their heads. What standard of living would be enough?

I plan to be a working mother and find the mentality that a mother going to work means that she is greedy and materialistic just plain wrong. I want to provide the best I can for my kids and part of that is living in a comfortable home on a safe street and a good school district. That dream would be impossible trying to live on just what my husband brings home. Plus, I worked hard earning my degree and building my professional life. I look forward to using it to serve as a role model to my children, especially if I have a daughter.

Suzanne on

I have to defend Tori here….for those of you who are suggesting that she “chooses” to live a lavish lifestyle they you should do a little more research and read her first book. Although her parents were extremely wealthy when she was growing up, Tori has worked consistenly since she as on 90210. As a teenager she made her own money and was not totally supported by her parents. She even paid rent to her mom for the condo she lived in before she got married. It’s easy to judge celebrities but I believe Tori is hardworking and to be honest, it usually does take two incomes to support a fmily even when you don’t live in Beverly Hills. I think it’s refreshing to see a celebrity using her “celebrity star power” to make an income for her family. I’m sick and tired of seeing all these Hollywood moms out and about with their nannies. I appluad Tori for her ability to make money for her family…who cares if she is “branding” herself as a mommy? Gosh, if I could make money that way I would too! I love this family!!!

robinepowell on

Since it’s apparente Tori “has to support her family”, I’m guessing that Dean’s a stay at home dad.

If he does work, no one knows about it. Besides Tori’s more popular and a very hot commadatite I guess.

Anne on

Dean does work but his work is in Canada. He will never make the money Tori makes due to her popularity over the years but they are a happy family and do not judge him because he makes less than her. Many Hollywood couples are in the same boat.

Ryo on

I think some people aren’t really considering just how Hollywood works. Tori and the family may have a lot of money NOW, but in 10 years that will probably be gone. And in those ten years, Hollywood would have forgotten about Tori Spelling and it will be a thousand times more difficult for her to get ANY jobs at all. And then how does she support her family? Yeah she could get a job doing something else, but she apparently loves doing this, and right now she’s able to do it. For people in HW, especially women, you really do only have a short span of time you can really be working and bringing in money. Don’t forget that.

Sadie on

“Honestly I don’t think Tori’s lifestyle is that lavish. Compared to other celebrities she has a very modest home and dresses her kids in Target clothes. I believe her when she says she needs to work in order to support her family. They must live where they do if she’s going to make a living in the industry and that costs some money.”

She just bought a house that’s almost 7,000 square feet, that cost almost 3 millions dollars (and I realize that real estate is expensive in L.A, but she could get by in a house that is less than 7,000 square feet if she wanted to, she just doesn’t want to). She wears designer clothes. She’s been shown on her reality show buying t-shirts that cost $1,500. She threw a party for her son’s first bithday party that involved setting up a carnival in the backyard. Her children sometimes wear Target clothes, and other times wear more expensive. She throws frequent parties that are lavish. She DOES live a lavish lifestyle. She may not live as lavishly as some celebrities, but she doesn’t have to live as lavishly as she lives, she chooses to do that.

“Plus, I’m with those of you who are saying who are we to impose a specific standard of living on them?”

It’s amazing to me that I’ve said about 4 times now that I’m not trying to impose any certain standard of living on Tori, and yet people in this comments section keep acting like that’s what I said. What I said was that Tori should live whatever kind of live she wants, but that she should be honest about it. And the truth of the matter is that she doesn’t have to work, she chooses to. And I also said multiple times that I see nothing wrong with someone being a working mother because they want to, it’s the dishonesty about it that bothers me.

“I plan to be a working mother and find the mentality that a mother going to work means that she is greedy and materialistic just plain wrong.”

Whose promoting that mentality on here? I don’t see anyone saying that. What I said was that if she wants to be a working mother then that’s great. And if she wants to have a lavish lifestyle then I don’t see anything wrong with it. What I’m expressing a problem with is lying about the reasons for working. There’s nothing wrong with working because you want to, or you love it, or because you want a higher standard of living. But I do see something wrong with trying to present it as if “I really wish I could be a SAHM, but it just isn’t possible” when that’s not the truth.

anna on

Tori does need to work. She inherited only a small amount from her dad and not as much as people would think.

Trish on

I know that Dean and Tori were both in Calgary a few months ago filming a movie “Santa Baby 2”. If you check imdb.com it looks like he works consistently, but she works more.

Jess on

Ryo-Yes, people try to touch & ask questions about when you’re due…way too much. People ask if I know what I’m having, when I say another boy (this is my 2nd), they always then ask if we’re going to try for a girl. I’ve even been asked several times, by total strangers, if I’m diliated yet.

ang on

a few points i’d like to make:
1.tori wants to work because she likes keeping busy and has said she thrives on doing lots of things at once.if she did stop working,the tabloids would have a field day coz of her upbringing. besides,i think she would get bored.some people are just like that.
2.dean works from time to time-again,some people live like that. they work for 4 months then earn enough to last a month or 2, eg. contract workers like in construction.he grew up poor but i think he’s a proud guy and wants to work as much as possible so tori doesn’t have to as much. he did a lot of voiceover work back in canada, he did 2 movies last year,one at the beginning of this year(coming out at christmas)plus the show and other projects with tori-eg.PSAs,public appearances,guest starring on other shows like headcase and ru paul’s show. they are doing some other joint projects for oxygen in the near future and there’s probably a lot of press too coming up for season 4 of their show, which starts may 26.tori&dean both also produce their show and other projects through their own production company so yeah he keeps busy lol.XOXO-i want to thankyou for asking so politely.i wish other people were as tactful as u.
3.tori can’t live as a normal person,being famous is all she knows. u aren’t going to find her packing bags at your local grocery store.there will come a day when she can’t work anymore, and as many fallen stars have shown over the years,u disappear, the money disappears and u will be sleeping on your best bud’s floor til social security housing comes along.being famous doesn’t last forever if you don’t work at it and it’s naive to think people will still make millions long after the tabloids have forgotten them.

kai on

Bieta, thanks for saying that, I feel the same way about her. And I also agree with Sadie, Tori should just… talk less. With everything she says, I feel it’s only about selling herself as this totally normal mother to cash in sympathy. Did she really just talk about her bowel movement??? And belly flab?? And needing to work to support her family?? I mean, come on.
At least she isn’t moaning about the paparazzi attention, now that would be hypocritical.

Sarah K. on

“It is still completely 100% false for her to say she has to work to support her family.”

Are you her accountant? Because that is the only way you would know whether or not she needs to work. What you think is sufficient to live on has nothing to do with what she thinks is sufficient. If she thinks that she really does need to send her kids to private school and give them the best of everything, who are you to tell her that she doesn’t need to? Some people would argue that a parent should work as hard as possible to get their kids every advantage they can afford. You seem to think that you live quite modestly, but there are plenty of people in this world who would think you live lavishly too. Why is it that we get to decide what is or isn’t the proper standard of living? It’s not like she’s asking any of us to pay for it.

jennt on

lol. you people have way too much time on your hands. if she was sitting at home on her butt doing nothing except rake in the royalties from 90210 you would be complaining about that as well. get over it!

Lis on

Some of these posts are cracking me up! Why does everyone care so much? LOL!

Angi on

If Tori was saying everything was a breeze and motherhoos was easy, people would complain. No matter what, she can’t win with some people. Also, living in California is VERY expensive. Even pre-school is expensive.

AND

For those who complained about her moving into a bigger house, they did that to make room for Dean’s son and for the safety of the babies. I don’t fault her for that. If I was in her shoes, I would do the exact same.

Yes, she lives a different lifestyle then most, but when did that become a crime.

kate on

those of you trying to break down tori and dean’s finances and decide for yourselves whether or not she could afford to stay home are making me laugh as i type this. a working actress cannot stay at home all day – her money and fame would be gone in an instant. just leave her alone and get over the fact that she was weirded out by pooping during delivery – that thought crossed my mind (and i bet millions of other womens’ minds too). sadie, you need to calm down a bit – you know nothing about tori so do not accuse her of lying about anything. the only thing you showed in your rambling posts is that you have some sort of disdain/jealousy for her and her lifestyle and will find anything to pick on.

XOXO on

Thank you for answering my question about Dean.

Bieta on

To me it’s like this:

Tori Spelling- Was sometime of actress, but now the majority of her money comes from talking about or selling some product related to motherhood.

Carnie Wilson- Was a singer, but now spends all her time talking about how okay she is with her wait and how great it is to be a mom.

Brooke Burke- Was a model, maybe still is a model, but spends the majority of her time hawking pregnancy girdles and discussing how she’s the holy messiah of Beverly hills sandboxes.

Some people may appreciate their candor, but to me it seems like nothing is sacred to them. I honestly, believe if these people didn’t put themselves in the public eye then no one would seek them out. Instead of reveling in this privacy, they talk about motherhood incessantly so they can advertise whatever baby related thing they have out this week.

Sadie on

“What you think is sufficient to live on has nothing to do with what she thinks is sufficient.”

For about the fifth time, I never said what amount of money was sufficient for Tori to live on. No one said anything about that. What I said was she does have the money to be a SAHM is she wants to, she just chooses not to. No one is saying she should become a SAHM, no one is saying that she should live a less lavish lifestyle. The only thing that I was saying is that I would respect her more if she was honest about the fact that she chooses to work and doesn’t have to. No one HAS to live in a mansion, they choose to. No one HAS to wear designer clothes, they choose to. No one HAS to throw lavish parties, they choose to. There’s a huge difference between having to do something and choosing to do something.

It’s very interesting that none of the people who are telling me I’m wrong have been able to explain why I’m wrong without twisting my words into something I never said, and claiming that I said something I never said. I would love to hear someone tell me why I’m wrong based on what I actually said and not what you guys are pretending I said.

Sadie on

“have to defend Tori here….for those of you who are suggesting that she “chooses” to live a lavish lifestyle they you should do a little more research and read her first book.”

I did read her first book, and I watched her reality show, and that’s why I know that she chooses to live a lavish lifestyle. She’s made in perfectly clear through her book, her show, and interviews. And no one is disputing whether she is hardworking or whether she has supported herself – I realize she works hard. I’m discussing how sick I am of celebrities being dishonest about their lives.

“I think some people aren’t really considering just how Hollywood works. Tori and the family may have a lot of money NOW, but in 10 years that will probably be gone.”

If that was really the reason why Tori was working now, to stock pile money for later, then she wouldn’t be tossing money away on constant parties, and designer clothes, and mansions. She got enough money from her father to live off of for the next 10 years at least, and then she made enough off her 90210 appearance, her jewerly line, her reality show, her DVD’s that she could live off of that money for the rest of her life if she wanted to. She just wouldn’t be able to live a lavish Hollywood lifestyle. And if she does want to live a lavish Hollywood lifestyle then that’s certainly her choice. The point isn’t whether she has a right to choose that, or whether it’s good or bad – the point is that she could be a SAHM or retire if she wanted to. She just doesn’t want to. If she would have just admitted that she works because she wants to, because she loves it, or because she wants to be able to continue living her Hollywood lifestyle then we wouldn’t even be having this discussion because I think she has every right to decide what kind of lifestyle she wants to live. But I will never buy the b.s. that she doesn’t have a choice. She has a choice.

daniela on

LOL @ Bieta! This is so, so very true! I couldn’t have said it better myself! 🙂

Sadie on

“sadie, you need to calm down a bit – you know nothing about tori so do not accuse her of lying about anything. the only thing you showed in your rambling posts is that you have some sort of disdain/jealousy for her and her lifestyle and will find anything to pick on.”

No I don’t need to calm down. I can have any opinion I want to. If you don’t like my posts, then feel free to ignore them, but I’m not going to alter my post to accomodate you. You also know nothing about how I feel about Tori. I have read her books, watched her shows, and enjoyed them. I have been a fan of her for years. But being a fan of someone, for me anyway, does not mean that I have to kiss the ground they walk on, and pretend like everything they do and say is perfect. And if I have a problem with someone a celebrity that I’m a fan of says or does I’m going to say it.

And I do know about Tori’s life. Do you know how I know about it? Because she told us all. She has exposed every part of her life, from her marriage, to her bodily functions, to her finances for all the world to see. So it’s a little late now for anyone to tell me I know nothing about her. If a celebrity doesn’t want people debating different aspects of their lives then they have the choice to keep that stuff private. If a celebrity is going to give up that privacy then I’m going to consider it fair game to discuss.

Sarah on

Wow, I’m laughing my head off right now over the people in here saying “Tori can’t help it” and “she doesn’t know any different.” It must be nice to be a celebrity and have a whole chorus of people reading and willing to pretend like their version of reality is completely true, whether is is or isn’t.

I like Tori’s hair in the picture above.

Lis on

Okay everyone, Sadie is right and everyone else is wrong. And don’t even dare try to offer a differing opinion or else we’re going to have to see a mile long post about why our opinions are wrong…

I’m totally being sarcastic, btw.

Maggie on

“the only thing you showed in your rambling posts is that you have some sort of disdain/jealousy for her and her lifestyle and will find anything to pick on.”

That’s a really worn out, tired attitude, that every person who expresses a problem with someone else is jealous of them. Some people express a problem with someone else simply beacause they have a problem with them. I keep hoping that some day we will reach a point as women where we will stop belittling other women’s feelings by claiming their concerns couldn’t be legitimate and therefore must be because of jealousy. The person you’re responding to have clearly laid out their reasons for having a problem with Tori’s statement. To call her concerns nothing more than jealousy does nothing to refute what she said. It only makes her point look stronger since you can’t seem to explain why you disagree without resorting to insults. Responding to someone’s opinion with “you’re just jealous” makes your position look weaker, not theirs.

Sadie on

“Okay everyone, Sadie is right and everyone else is wrong. And don’t even dare try to offer a differing opinion or else we’re going to have to see a mile long post about why our opinions are wrong…”

If you don’t like my posts then ignore them. I’m not the one trying to tell other people that they’re opinions are wrong. I stated my opinion originally and since then I’ve gotten a series of hostile comments in return from people who have told me that I have too much time on my hands, that I need to leave her alone, that I don’t know anything, that I think I’m always write, that I’m jealous. I’m proud to say that I have conducted myself through this debate (which was what I thought the purpose of this comments section was for) without resorting to name calling, belittling other people’s opinions, sarcasm, ordering other people around, and making fun of other people’s posts. I’m truly stunned that I have come to a site that I thought was read and commented on by adults and I have gotten insults, rudeness, and sarcasm just because I refuse to be bullied into agree with you. It’s obvious that this is not the site for me. I prefer to have rational, polite, adult conversation/debates with people who are capable of saying why they disagree with me without hurling insults around.

Sarah K. on

I can’t believe that this is turning into a huge issue once again. Sadie, I do not at all “kiss the ground Tori walks on.” In fact, most of the time I’m not a fan. But for the tenth time, just because you think she doesn’t “HAVE” to wear designer clothes, guess what? Tori does think that she “HAS” to. So, if she thinks that those things are truly necessary, what is the issue? Just because you don’t agree with her necessities doesn’t mean that she’s lying about needing to work for them.

Brooke Williams on

Dean actually worked more when he wasn’t Mr. T. Spelling. He does do some Lifetime movies once or twice a year. I agree about the privacy factor and moving but their house was 5 bedrooms and one was used for the nanny. It is crazy to think she remodeled it so much only to move. I think they will wait his time with the redecorating. I just can’t believe she is now a valley girl. She moved from her Beverly Hills address to the valley whcih in Hollywood is a step down. The thing I like is that the valley is more family friendly and closer to Dean’s sonm Jack. Dean needs to be their for his 1st son as well.

D on

Oh goodness! Every time a woman comments about how she has to work for her family, certain posters (not naming names) rail on them saying “you could opt for a smaller house and skrimp and stay home”. It is the same arguement on every board.

I have always said, what works for you may not work for someone else. So focus on your own lives.

Tori looks fab but goodness she is skinny.

Suzanne on

Wow! It looks like Sadie is taking this a little too personal….

Angi on

Anyone else wonder if Sadie is a friend of Candy Spelling or Dean’s ex-wife? I mean, for someone she don’t know, there sure is A LOT of anger and hate there for Tori.

Chicki on

Sadie,

Let me give this a try. You have come to the conclusion that Tori CAN be a SAHM, but that she “chooses” not to because she wants to work hard in order to maintain an extravagant lifestyle. In fact you stated, “It is still completely 100% false for her to say she has to work to support her family”, BUT this is based on YOUR idea of a conventional marriage, where the father would work and a mom could have the “option” of staying home with the children. Tori absolutely DOES have to work, because hubby doesn’t and daddy didn’t leave her much $ to speak of…

Besides the fact that Dean does not appear to have a steady stream of work coming in to their household budget, The main reason you are wrong in your assertion that Tori “chooses to work hard” as opposed to being a SAHM is because it is she and not you that is in a position to make the determination! I’m sure Tori could not be a SAHM even living modestly if her husband doesn’t work on a regular or consistent basis. Where would the money for their household budget come from? I think you’re also assuming that because she comes from such a wealthly family that she gets some money from her mother or something. I’m not sure she does, although I have wondered if there’s some kind of backdeal going on with her mom to keep a fake feud going just for publicity — but that’s another story!

Does that make sense to you, Sadie?

Chicki on

Sadie,

It just seems that after all of these posts you keep missing the point that when Tori says that she has to work to support her family, that statement alone does not make her disingenuine, it makes her honest because she wants to live a certain lifestyle that you your self said shouldn’t be anyone’s business but hers. You’re just viewing her comments through your life’s prism and trying to call her out about it when you shouldn’t.

Maybe it’s a question of semantics here, I dunno…

BostonMom on

Wow, what a debate! I think that what this all comes down to is the fact that many women make choices about whether to work or not…and all those choices should be respected. But, I think that Tori’s comment was disrepectful to all those women (and men) out there who really and truly NEED to work to put a simple roof over their kids’ heads and to put some food on the table. A wealthy celebrity (and let’s face it, Tori is wealthy now) has no right placing herself into that same category. If only she knew what it is like to work three jobs just to bring home minimum wage, perhaps she would have thought twice before saying that.

BostonMom on

A quick p.s. to my earlier comment…Tori inherited $800,000 from her dad. Although that is a very small percentage of his net worth, it is still more money than most of us see in a lifetime!

Sarah K. on

BostonMom, to say that her comments are disrespectful is simply a projection. She said she needs works to support her family. How can anyone construe that as disrespectful? Everyone works to support their families!! We have absolutely NO idea what her financial situation truly is. For all we know, she is in massive debt. At the end of the day, her need to work has nothing to do with anyone else.

Lately many posters have been picking on these little sentences made by celebrities that are really pretty harmless. Everyday yet another celebrity is being “disrespectful” and “ignorant” and “out of touch with reality” based on these little snip-its from interviews. I fail to understand why people get offended by every little thing. It’s getting really old.

Asiram on

What cracks me up here is that this whole debate is raging, and not one person has mentioned that Tori is talking about “belly flab!” If you’ve seen any recent pictures of her, you’d notice that she is now incredibly emaciated and underweight. When I saw there were 50 comments, I thought that’s what all the hoopla would be about! 🙂

CelebBabyLover on

Sarah K.- ITA! For all we know, in her mind, Tori DOES have to work! If that is the case, then she is not lying.

CelebBabyLover on

To clarify my previous comment: What I mean is that Tori may feel so strongly that she HAS to work that she may not realize other people don’t think she does.

anon on

This discussion is probably long dead, but I just wanted to put this out there: Sadie, I read all your posts and totally understand what you meant (and did not mean). That’s not to say I either agree or disagree with you – I actually have no opinion on either the topic or Tori Spelling herself. But I felt for you, with all the sarcasm and insult flinging that resulted just from your trying to explain a genuine opinion (and people explaining to you what you actually meant).

A similar thing happened to me in a different discussion at this site (seems to be a staple feature of CBB these days). It’s hard to have a differing opinion here.

CelebBabyLover on

anon- Having an opinion is fine. The problem is that some CBB commentors aren’t always respectful about voicing them.

KimberlyL on

I agree with Sadie and I agree with anon that it is hard to have an opinion here:
My mother had to work when I was growing up in Australia. We had no income (i.e $0) so she got a $500 a week job and we paid $300 a week in rent for a 2 bedroom. My father refused to work. My mother got cancer and still went to work. She HAD to work. No one is trying to state what the standard of living should be as that is obviously a subjective matter. However, I would have loved to live better.
Tori has said on many occasions that she loves work. Forgetting about her upbringing she has earned a reasonable amount in the last few years and she owns her own home. She may need to work to support the lifestyle that she deems neccessary and one she is accustomed to. She could work a third of the amount she does now, be at home more, and still earn enough to support her family. I’m only talking about the necessities – i.e. shelter, clothing, food, health, education, etc. To have the extras one would need a higher income from wherever. That is a CHOICE. No one is judging anyone for wanting the finer things in life (and it is true that many people would see these things as a neccesity if they are accustomed to them). Good on her for working and allowing her children to have that. She is not a bad person for wanting that and she has the means to make it happen.
But don’t then say that you would love to be a SAHM but CAN’T. She has many more options than the average person and should appreciate that. In an attempt to bond with the average mother she is pushing it with her comments. Remember the comment Reece Witherspoon made that rubbed everyone the wrong way, about how it was hard for her to be a young mom? Everyone was talking about how much money she would have had as opposed to the average mom at that age. The fact is that Tori’s comment was odd and did sound like she was trying to come off as hard done by and self-sacrificing.

Sorry for the long post.

anon on

You’re right CelebBabyLover, and it goes both ways. Everyone needs to be respectful, whether they’re in the minority or the majority of opinion.

In this particular discussion, I felt for Sadie as once the current turned against her, plenty of people were ready to jump in and misconstrue her words. The ganging up mentality bothered me.

Comments like this one: “Okay everyone, Sadie is right and everyone else is wrong,” being “totally sarcastic” as the author says, achieve absolutely nothing.

CelebBabyLover on

KimberlyL- Maybe Tori really does think that she can’t be a stay-at-home mom. In her mind, not working might not be an option. Also, I think it’s very easy to have an opinion here, as long as it’s a respectful one.

KimberlyL on

I agree that that is probably what it is – she is unable not to work. Her reasons are her reasons and she does not have to justify it to me or anyone. But, this is not something she HAS (like so many do) to do to support her family. I also hope that my post was respectful – I am new at this. I personally have no opinion regarding Tori, but I was bothered by her comments about being a SAHM.

I enjoyed reading Sadie’s comments. I didn’t even completely agree with her. While it is hard to put opinion in text without offending someone, Sadie put forth her argument eloquently. It was unfortunate that what resulted was essentially name calling and sarcastic swipes. We should be having intellectual and informative conversation. We should be offering opinions freely and without fear of being criticized. We should be supporting each other through the parenting process and giving tips and advice as well as jovial comments regarding the latest celebrity. We should not be attacking people for having differing views. Obviously a person should substantiate their claim – Sadie did that. And she said ‘well prove me wrong.’ The funny thing is that the rude comments back did not sway her opinion or change the direction of this forum. I’m usually very anxious to comment for fear of my words coming off wrong. We shouldn’t all be this judgmental, though it is easy in a forum. It’s hard when one person is commenting and twenty other people or taking the moral high ground – things like “well you don’t know them how would you know” and “lets not judge people” and “its nobody’s business” and “i would never let my child do that” etc. And I reckon that the fear of retribution is stifling conversation on these boards.