No Crying It Out For Valentina Pinault

02/13/2009 at 07:00 PM ET

Children grow up in the blink of an eye, and Salma Hayek is determined not to take one day for granted with her daughter Valentina Paloma, 16-months. During a Wednesday appearance on The Rachael Ray Show, the 42-year-old actress said the best piece of advice she’s received as a first-time mom came from her own mom, Diana Jiménez, and that is to always be aware of just how quickly time passes.

“When you have a baby everybody tells you what to do and everybody contradicts each other and they drive you mad,” Salma explains. “They say, ‘Put her in the bassinet, stick her in there, let her cry’…Right?…Everybody is telling me this.”

“But I wasn’t doing it. She said to me, ‘Always put your baby to sleep because one day you are going to wish you could do that, that you could hold her in your arms and put her to sleep. And do you know what? I put my baby to sleep every night. I love that moment, even though sometimes it takes hours. I do enjoy it very, very much.”

Of course, Valentina doesn’t stay asleep for long! Her nighttime woes have only continued and have in fact progressed to a point where Salma is “convinced” that Valentina is seeing ghosts. “Last night she woke up and her eyes were open, and she’s looking at one specific point and she’s going, ‘No no no no, au revoir,’ which means goodbye in French,” Salma explains. “She’s looking at someone, but there’s no one there.” Salma adds,

“I was so scared, and I’m like, ‘Yes, au revoir, whoever you are, get out!’ And then she started saying it in English. ‘Bye bye, bye bye!’ I guess she was trying in different languages to see what nationality this ghost was to go away. It was terrifying!”

Valentina is Salma’s daughter with partner François-Henri Pinault.

Source: The Rachael Ray Show

FILED UNDER: News , Parenting

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Showing 22 comments

PollyWantACracker on

I let my baby fall asleep on me every night too. He also woke up a lot at night even after a year old too. Huh.

J on

My son is almost 2 1/2 and he hardly ever sleeps straight through the night. It only gets harder to get children to go to sleep as they get older so it’s definitely best to enjoy those moments

Daisy on

When my one of my older brothers was a baby my mother used to go in to check on him at night and he would be sitting up in his cot speaking in Irish to someone, and would tell my mam that he was talking with our granda who died the year he was born. Sounds spooky but it’s true when they say children have a 6th sense lol

As for leaving the baby to cry,it’s not something I could do and I hear more people saying it doesn’t work than I hear saying that putting your babe down yourself doesn’t.

anna on

Babies should not be left to cry. They are only babies and they cry because they need something, it is their only way to comunicate an immediate need. At some point they will grow out of it, but until then they need to be tended to all the time. That’s just the way it is, nature cannot be changed. Babies act the same all over the world. Research shows babies who are left to cry and who’s needs are not met will have lower IQ. (Not sure if I can post link here in case anyone wants to read the article, I found it by searching online).

morgan on

I absolutely believe her! My mother passed away several years before my niece was born. When my niece was a baby my sister would here her over the monitor making coos and talking sounds. She would go in and Cadence would be looking past my sister and smiling. One night my sister came in and Cady’s mobile was going. We learned to smile and say Hello Mom! whenever it happened. I love knowing that my mom knows her 1st granddaughter after all!

kat on

I agree… I’m fine with letting a baby fuss for five minutes while you’re walking there instead of running and all… or letting them fuss quietly for a bit to see if they resettle, but crying is for a reason.

we taught our babies to fall asleep on their own with no crying… and there were times when they needed us to fall asleep and we followed the cue.

Heck, my first son coslept and, after the first 15mo sleeping on her own, my crib-jumper daughter started doing it, too. My middle son, however, from the start, preferred his own space when he was tired (with some music on), and he has only slept in my bed when he was sick.

I know there is a right sleep setup for every baby and set of parents, and they aren’t always the same, but I don’t think crying is needed.

Nadia on

YES!!! Another mom who doesn’t cry it out! I think it is horrible! Babies cry for a reason!!

Lorelei on

I never let my babies cry it out, but I put them to bed when they were drowsy, never completely asleep and it worked for them. I still think it’s important for a baby to self sooth, but not from a frantic state. Valentina is a beautiful baby!

Cyndi on

I really love Salma and the stories about her lovely daughter. From the time my oldest daughter was 2 weeks old until about 2, she would look at any light and wave and ‘talk’ to someone. I always just assume its someone from our family that is checking on us.

Jane on

That’s a beautiful story, Morgan.

I wonder where Salma is getting some of her advice..
Why would everyone be telling her:
“They say, ’Put her in the bassinet, stick her in there, let her cry’…Right?…”
I remember in another interveiw, she said that everyone told her that boys were much easier than girls.
It sounds like she has some very opinionated and narrow-minded friends or advice-givers!

Kristen on

What does everyone think cry it out means? I mean, when my son was a year old, and I would put him to bed, and if he still wanted to play, he would cry when I put him in his crib. He didn’t need anything, he was just crying because he didn’t want to go to bed. I wouldn’t let a newborn cry it out, but as far as older babies who don’t need anything and are just crying to cry, then what? I’m just curious, as to what the actual definition of “cry it out” means to different people.

fay on

kind of off topic, but salma often talks abt valentina speaking spanish, french and english, and i’d REALLY like my baby to be francophone…

unfortunately my baby has parents from two anglophone countries and while i’m trying french w/ rosetta stone, i’m wondering if there are any programs for BABIES that help develop 2nd languages?

if anyone can help me out w/ this, or how you taught ur child a 2nd language as a non native speaker, it would really help me out… there is a french immersion school in my hometown and i’m planning to move back there when the baby is born, but s/he won’t be able to take advantage till after she’s 5, and i’d like him/ her to be bilingual from as early as possible…

thanks a lot u guys!!!

jessie on

that’s so cute that she’s talking to “ghosts”, lol. actually i’ve heard that babies can see angels so maybe that’s who she’s looking at

melania on

I have to totally agree with Salma on the benefits of rocking the baby to sleep yourself. You can never get those moments back and they are priceless. I’ll never do the cry it out method. It is just not in my personality, but I don’t think it causes any damage to babies for parents who favor that method. Our daycare provider has been getting on us to let her cry it out because of her tendency to be so clingy. I can’t do it, but my husband and I always say “we tried”, even though we don’t.🙂 And, yes, it does seem like everyone has an opinion and most people tell you to let the baby cry it out. But how many really did/do that with their own. Not many, I bet.

Allie on

The ghost thing is weird, because when my niece was probably around 18 months, my brother had taken her over to my grandma’s house while she was out of town. My niece just started waving and talking to the air. My brother asked her who she was talking to, and she grandpa. She just kept waving, giggling, and saying hi. My grandpa died over 21 years ago.🙂

Kristen, about the cry it out thing, my definition of cry it out is: after you’ve tried everything, and you’re baby STILL won’t go to sleep, you lay them in their crib, and they cry for a few minutes until they fall asleep. It seems like everyone else is defining it as just putting the baby in the crib, and if she cries, leave her be. Don’t tend to her at all. People should know the difference between cries and react accordingly. There’s no right or wrong way, no matter what “studies” show. Studies aren’t always right, just like doctors aren’t always right. Go with your instincts.🙂

Jackie on

I never let my son cry it out and practice attachment parenting and I must say he is the most independent child! People who say your child will be too clingy are wrong. I think my son is so independent because he learned that we care about his feelings and needs!

Fevvers on

I like Salma Hayek, she seems like a fun, warm slightly crazy and amazingly gorgeous woman. But I have to say if my child was taking hours to settle and then waking up all night I’d be suicidal. That sounds totally unrealistic to me, if you have a job or other children to raise and so on. Let alone how sleep deprived poor Valentina must be. What is it with attatchment parenting that so many think it does not involve putting any routines or boundaries in place? (not all of course) I practice a lot of attatchment parenting principles but I still think that having a bedtime and developing good sleep cues etc is a good idea. It should not take hours to put a toddler to bed. I’d get some advice if I were Salma because that just sounds like bad news for her and her daughter!

Karleigh on

I practise attachment parenting too and never let my child cry, let alone cry it out. By meeting his needs, whilst he is young – and you know babies can’t actually self soothe until they are closer to three (their brains just aren’t developed enough to do it before then), he will be super secure in himself and independant. It is for such a short time that babies need our help. Studies show that babies who needs aren’t met, find it hard to be empathetic adults who find it hard to give in a relationship setting. The plan is for my son to be a wonderful friend, husband, lover and father. It’s the best gift you can give your child. And it’s much more enjoyable and less stressful than letting them cry! I co-sleep so it’s super easy. He won’t want to sleep with me forever, he’ll want his big boys bed! And move out when he’s ready.

Salma I absolutely love putting my son to sleep, even if it takes hours. Perhaps teething makes her baby take a while to fall asleep? Every baby is different, mind you. My baby sometimes takes hours, but he is 5 months old.

And yes I totally believe babies see things. I was 4 weeks pregnant and a toddler came up to me calling ‘mummy! mummy! mummy!’ his father couldn’t stop him and he was confused until I told him I was pregnant… babies look at you differently too when you are, and you aren’t even showing. Pay attention!

Anna on

“Kristen, about the cry it out thing, my definition of cry it out is: after you’ve tried everything, and you’re baby STILL won’t go to sleep, you lay them in their crib, and they cry for a few minutes until they fall asleep. It seems like everyone else is defining it as just putting the baby in the crib, and if she cries, leave her be. Don’t tend to her at all. People should know the difference between cries and react accordingly. There’s no right or wrong way, no matter what “studies” show. Studies aren’t always right, just like doctors aren’t always right. Go with your instincts.”

I totally agree. The commenter who said that babies who are allowed to “cry it out” have lower IQs is completely misinformed. Everyone I know who doesn’t do “cry it out” has kids (not just babies) that are TERRIBLE sleepers. The parents are exhausted all the time even when the kids are 2 years old because the kids won’t sleep. The kids also seem more crabby and clingy. Kids that don’t learn how to sleep through the night will be overtired, and THEY will be the ones with lower IQs because they’ve been too sleep-deprived to learn as much.

Audrey on

I love Salma, and I think Valentina is a beautiful and adorable baby, so I mean no ill by saying this, but I really just have a hard time believing a 16month old can learn 2 languages and know the difference between them?

CelebBabyLover on

Audrey- Actually, toddlers are like sponges when it comes to languages! A baby’s brain is hard-wired to learn any language on Earth, so for the first few years of their lives, they can pick up on other languages relatively quickly. I also don’t see why Salma would lie about Valentina being multi-lingual!

nana on

is this child aware that she has a half sister, that was born at least months or less than when she was born, maybe the half sister is trying to connect with her.

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