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02/06/2009 at 03:00 PM ET

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Sarah on

I don’t even know where to begin. Nadya Suleman tried for seven years to get pregnant? Um, she’s only 33 now, so she started trying to get pregnant at 18?

She blames her “dysfunctional” childhood, but what does she think her kids will have? Her children will have it 100x worse than anything she experienced. She suffered from a lack of control? What kid controls their environment? It’s probably this sense of entitlement that landed her in this situation. Her kids will have to deal with far bigger issues than not controlling their environment. They have to worry about getting their mother’s attention, clothes/food, paying for college, etc. Does she honestly think that’s a better situation than one she had growing up?

And, those same parents that apparently ruined her life will be helping her raise her own kids because of the mess she made. They can’t be all bad if they’re giving up their golden years to help out the daughter who clearly has no gratitude for their sacrifices. I’m shocked that after everything her parents have done for her that she would go on national television and blame their parenting for her irresponsible conduct.

She’s a grown up and needs to own what she does. After a certain point, blaming someone else doesn’t work. If she thinks she’s adult enough to raise 14 kids, she’s adult enough to take responsibility for her life. And, if she think her parents screwed her up so badly, maybe she shouldn’t be taking their money, home, and time.

I do not see how this will help her image at all. While I truly feel for her poor innocent kids, I hope that she doesn’t get handouts. It’s obvious that she has no gratitude for those who help her.

Sarah on

Sorry, one more thing to add to my rant. The sixty-year old woman giving birth to twins is yet another reminder that fertility treatments are being abused. The point was to help childless women of childbearing age have a healthy child. At the age of 60, this woman probably won’t even see her kids graduate from high school. Given the health risks for both her and her kids, why would anyone allow her to go through with this? Doctors are supposed to act in their patient’s best interest, not sell out to the highest bidder.

Ekaterina on

Sarah–you’re right on the money about this woman, AND about the abuse of fertility treatments these days. It’s all so very wrong. I read about the interview over at Jezebel and its obvious that this woman is insanely naive and incredibly selfish. It’s obvious that she’s never been told no in her entire life. The fact that both she and her mother have been trashing each other publicly angers me to no end. These people are supposed to be responsible for 14 young kids? It’s so painfully sad. Those kids deserve so much better than this.

Sanja on

I’m sorry, but a doctor willing to implant 8 embryos in a woman with 6 children and no apparent fertility issues should at the very least loose his licence (where I live he’d be in jail, because the maximum # of embryos can be 3 and only in women who have had multiple unsuccessful IVF attempts). Doesn’t the US have ANY laws governing fertility treatments!?

It seems to me that this was some king of illegal medical experiment, because that’s the only way I can understand how she managed to pay for so many IVFs. My friends saved from two pay checks and had to get a loan to do it twice (luckily the second time was successful).

As for this woman, all I can say that I sincerely hope she gets some psychiatric help before she destroys those poor children’s lives (shakes head at the whole family situation).

PollyWantACracker on

Women have a right to do with their bodies what they wish. They can choose to have many children, no children, terminate the children they’ve already created. It’s their decision. Now if people want to start regulating women’s reproduction choices, that’s fine but how can we have the right to terminate to the 9th month of pregnancy and not have the right to create as many kids at whatever age we want? Thirty was once considered old. Now forty is an age where women think they have plenty of time. We can judge them all we want, but when we start regulating their reproduction choices, it seems odd that privacy can be important in one area but not the other. Also before anyone says what about the children, well what about the aborted children or the children of drug addicted mothers? These women have a right to do with their bodies what they choose, innocent life be damned. US laws dictate that freedom. I know in Europe things are more strict regarding abortion but in the US we have the freedom to choose until the very last minute what is in OUR best interests. These women made selfish decisions but how is that any different than our right to abortion? My point is that once you start regulating, when do you stop? When the majority feels ok with women’s choices? The majority doesn’t support abortion the way the law is now but it is still the law and it remains a constitutional right. I can understand the outrage at these women, yet there is a double standard. Women either have freedom over their bodies and what they do with them or they don’t.

Silvermouse on

I don’t think it’s selfish. Many people don’t think before they act. I know I sure don’t haha. Who are we to judge this woman? On the 60 year old woman, I am so-so about that. I do think infertility treatments are good for society though. However, I would consider adoption first before hand. *I live in conservative part of the country* I do want to be an egg donor though just to help someone out or a surrogate mother🙂 That is if I don’t marry.

Sarah on

Silvermouse, the very act of having children is “selfish.” We obviously do it because we WANT to be parents, not because some unborn child needs to be conceived and born. I’m not saying that wanting kids is wrong. But, choosing to have kids is done out of our own desires, not the child’s.

Furthermore, this woman was blessed with six healthy children. Instead of spending her very limited resources on them, she spent that money on fertility treatments because she wanted more kids she couldn’t afford. How is that not selfish?

I would agree with your comment that we shouldn’t judge her except for the fact that if she can’t provide for her kids, the government will and she’s going on national television. If she’s making irresponsible choices that affect the taxpayers and then agrees to speak about it, she opens herself up to criticism.

Also Polly, while abortion is a constitutionally recognized right, its still heavily regulated by state laws. So, the analogy to fertility treatments isn’t quite right.

Di on

When I first found out that the woman who gave birth to octuplets already had 6 children already, I couldn’t believe it and found the whole situation somewhat strange. I’ve read so many negative comments about this woman and I kind of feel like someone needs to play devil’s advocate.

In other countries like China, there is a 1 child limit but I’m glad that I live in America where the government does not determine how many kids one can have. I’ve read some crazy comments over the last few days. People suggesting that poor people or people on welfare should be sterilized or suggesting that this woman is mentally unstable w/o any evidence to support that contention other than the fact that she wanted a big family. Some people have even suggested that the very fact that she has given birth to 8 kids at once means that she is guilty of some kind of child abuse or neglect.

I have always been of the opinion that an individual can have as many kids as he or she wants as long as you can take care of them. Some people can barely take of care of two while the Duggars of TLC have managed to raise 18. People assume that this woman can not afford 14 kids but if she makes a book or tv deal or sells the first pics to a magazine, she’ll have more than enough money. Brad/Angelina have made millions of dollars off of their children and many celebrity families have done reality shows with much criticism.

With the right amount of support, those children may just turn out okay. Atleast the mother has 2-3 months to figure where she is going to live and what she is going to do.

zoe on

I agree 100% with Di. I am really astounded by how intense the hostility is against this woman.

Allie on

Di, if someone can take care of their kids, then feel free to have as many as possible. This woman COULD NOT afford the first 6. Her parents bought her a house! And they couldn’t afford both houses, so they foreclosed on their OWN home. She got a $168,000 settlement, but I’m sure that money went towards her being a professional child psychology student. Her dad is being contracted back out to Iraq to make between $100-$130k to help support her & her 14 children!!! How’d she afford the IVF for the first 7 years before she got pregnant? How’d she afford it AFTER she got pregnant and had a kid to take care of? IVF is VERY expensive. Why go through all the IVF, when she could adopt? If she loves kids THAT much, she could have saved 14 from the system. That is why people are judging this woman negatively. She says she’s obsessed with children because of her bad childhood….. but is letting the same “dysfunctional” parent’s help raise her 14 children!!! Lord have mercy. Does that not seem like an unstable person to you? Would you, if you were her doctor, knowing she had 6 kids at home, implant another 6 embryos into this woman?! Atleast the Duggar’s can afford their kids. They have no debt. They have a steady income. They have their own house that THEY built themselves. Brad & Ange makes millions off their kids because they’re movie stars! But, they don’t pocket that money, they donate it to charity. Jon & Kate, yeah, they’ve taken a lot of handouts, and have made millions off their kids. But, they didn’t have 6 kids at home before they started ANOTHER IVF treatment, or I’m sure they would be getting a MORE NEGATIVE response than what they already get (Don’t believe they get negative press? Search the internet. People are nasty.). I wouldn’t have a problem with this lady having 14 kids if she could afford it. She did it because she wants attention. She wants money. She wants handouts. I’m sure she thinks she’ll get a show out of it, as well. It just seems wrong.

DLR in Canada on

dayum, the whole issue of IVF has gone whacko. we’ve got a woman who obviously has issues and isn’t even able to afford 14 kids saying she wants even more kids and then a 60-year old woman who goes to another country to have kids because the country she lives in actually had the smarts to put limits on the age of IVF recipients. IVF is meant to help people unable to conceive naturally and to ensure a successful pregnanty, not to create a litter of 8 kids or have post-menopausal women give birth. it is just whacko, imo.

Silvermouse on

So we shouldn’t all have children because it’s selfish, let me mark that down in my planner and tell my future husband that. (being sarcastic)
Maybe the woman is just dillusional? Lots of women are with 1,2, or 3 kids. For example, certain women in my hometown choose to believe that their children could do no wrong. Now isn’t that delusional. Why are we not verbally attacking women who believe that? Or who believe that their mentally sick children are perfectly well to protect their own image in society.
And let me tell you, those women can afford that, but that is even more awful then have 10+ children.
And I believe it is no one’s business to criticize this women unless you personally know her or are one of the children yourselves. Women have children in impoverished situations EVERYDAY. Girls get (sorry for the slang here) knocked up all the time when they’re not ready to have kids. But it happens, and we cannot do anything about it. We can critize all we want, but these situations are NOT GOING TO CHANGE.

Silvermouse on

Haha, DLR, that’s funny.
As to people who bash IVF for sits. like this, it’s the new mil. Techonology is a part of life and we all take advantage of it. Deal with it.

Silvermouse on

Di, I totally agree with you for once. *normally I don’t agree with your posts :-(* Just because someone has money to support kids, doesn’t mean it’s a good situation for the kid.

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