In a wide-ranging interview with the UK newspaper Telegraph, songstress Lily Allen reveals how her despair over a January 2008 miscarriage led her to spend three weeks in a psychiatric ward. “I was really depressed because of the miscarriage and I’d kind of lost the plot a bit,” the 23-year-old songstress explains. “It was quite a nasty time.” The baby was the first for Lily and her then-boyfriend Ed Simons of The Chemical Brothers; the couple were “over the moon” to learn they were about to become parents. Recalls Lily,
“It’s pretty hard to talk about it, but that Christmas I was at home with my family and Ed, and I wasn’t drinking, and I just sat there knowing I was having a baby and I was in absolute bliss. Sitting round eating turkey, playing games, watching everybody getting drunk, and being really excited knowing this time next year, I was going to have a baby…And I haven’t.”
The couple split shortly after the miscarriage, and Lily admits she often tortures herself with questions of ‘what if?’
“I guess… it wasn’t to be. That’s all I can say…Maybe if I’d stayed pregnant and had the baby then things would have worked out between me and Ed. I don’t know. You could drive yourself insane thinking about it.”
Lily’s latest album It’s Not Me, It’s You will be in stores February 10th.