Sound Off! Do Your Children Believe in Santa Claus?

Jesse Grant/WireImage; Bauer Griffin

He’s been coming down the chimney for centuries. He helped create the Miracle on 34th Street. And it took a movie to make Virginia believe in him. But as we adults know, Santa Claus is just a fun concept that lives in the hearts and minds of many children. Reese Witherspoon recently said both of her children (Ava Elizabeth, 9, and Deacon Reese, 5) still believe in Santa Claus, while Debra Messing, whose family celebrates Hanukkah, shared that son Roman Walker, 4 ½, believes, too. Melissa Joan Hart even tells son Mason Walter, 2 ½, that Santa is watching his every move!

So now it’s your turn to Sound Off! Do your children believe in Santa (or other types of figures)? When do you think is the right age to learn the truth?

Comments

My children believe in Santa Clause (7 and 3 1/2). But they are also taught other things that are celebrated at this time of the year. They learn about Hannukah and Kwanzaa. Even though we don’t celebrate them in our home we make it a point that they understand that Christmas for us is other things for other people. I want them to have an open mind to learning new cultures and beliefs and understanding that everyone in this world has the right to express beliefs or non beliefs. The only thing I am against is someone saying that we can’t express them because they don’t believe in the same thing or not at all. It frustrates me on levels knowing that people can sue organizations or people because they express their beliefs openely it its not theirs beliefs so they feel they shouldn’t be allowed to celebrate it openly. ie (decorations)

- *AJ* on December 9th, 2008

My children at 5 and 7, do believe in Santa. However, they do understand and know the true meaning of why we as a family celebrate christmas. We don’t over do the Santa thing, however, that is a part of our holiday celebration. We also celebrate the religious aspect of Christmas. I think that around the time the children are more fully aware of the TRUE meaning of christmas, we will let them know about “Santa” But for now, Im just allowing them to enjoy Santa during Christmas time.

- Helena on December 9th, 2008

My daughter believes, and I encourage her belief, because it’s magical. To see the look on her face on Christmas morning, and see the excitement building in her over the previous days are just wonderful. I will let her come to the truth at her own pace, and allow her to believe for as long as possible. I never spoil her too much, she gets one big toy from Father Christmas and then a few little ones and of course her stocking presents, but she gets other presents from family. There’s nothing wrong with allowing a child to have the magic of Father Christmas, it’s special and something families can enjoy together. I’m yet to see a convincing argument against allowing a child to believe in Father Christmas.

- phoebe on December 9th, 2008

no santa here. my children are 2.5 and 5 years old, and i have told them from the beginning that there is a character called Santa that many children and their parents like to have fun with at christmas-time, but that it’s all pretend. my 5-year-old knows that he is not to discuss the fasct that santa doesn’t exist, among friends at school.
they still get presents, but not from santa.

- jaQ on December 9th, 2008

what’s frustrating for me, is that EVERYone we encounter asks things like, “are you excited that santa is coming?” etc. i don’t want to a.) hurt their feelings, or b.) get lectured… people seem to feel strongly about this, and do NOT like that i’ve told my kids the truth…

- jaQ on December 9th, 2008

I also teach my daughter the true meaning of Christmas, because I don’t want her growing up thinking it’s just ‘present day’ and that Father Christmas is the only aspect to it. Every year, I begin to read the nativity story during the month of December, and we have a little nativity scene that we talk about as we put it out. This year, as my daughter is now four, she did a craft project with her grandmother and made a nativity scene out of a cardboard box (stable), some toilet rolls (wise men), straw (hamster bedding) and other items. It was fun for her, but she got to understand more and more about why we celebrate Christmas. I think there needs to be a balance between celebrating on a religious level, and making it a wonderful family day.

- phoebe on December 9th, 2008

For us Christmas is about Jesus(and we have Advent to lead up to it) but they do have stockings filled by “Santa”,too, yet are also aware that he’s not real; just someone who dresses up, like an actor playing a part.It’s part of a legend for them, sort of like the Boogeyman; a story from long ago they can enjoy but at the same time know it’s not real.

- Pogue Mahone on December 9th, 2008

My children do not believe in Santa because my husband and I made the decision not to tell them that he’s real. They know who he is, what his story is, and to respect the belief of other children who are taught he is real. But for our family, Christmas is only about Christ’s birthday…it’s what works best for us.

- UggaMugga.com on December 9th, 2008

jaQ- I don’t have children yet, and even though I think I would like to do the same as you with my kids and explain that Santa is a fictional character, one albeit that many kids believe in, I’m not sure it would be worth the headache from all the flack you’d receive.

- Red on December 9th, 2008

My daughter believes and I will let her believe as long as she wants to. She will figure it out in her own time just like I did. There is nothing wrong with having this magical part of Christmas.

- Heather on December 9th, 2008

My children aged 3 and 6 believe in Santa. It’s part of being a child to have the belief in something like that. I always thought it would take away their innocence that all children have at Chistmas at other times if they were told something else. It’s part of the fun of being a child, yes I still teach them about the true meaning of Christmas but there is no reason to not tell them about Santa.

- Meg on December 9th, 2008

I have 5 kids ages 23, 22, 18, 16 and 14. If you ask any one of them if Santa is real, they will all tell you yes. I reality, they know. But in the spirit of the season, Santa is alive and thriving. Christmas is magical time of year for everyone, not just the little ones.

- Teri on December 9th, 2008

All of my children believe in Santa. I love the magic around it, and my husband and I decided that we would let our children believe until they found out on their own. It has become a tradition sitting in our new pj’s on xmas eve with hot cocoa tracking santa on the internet!
That being said, our children are aware about the true meaning behind christmas. Every xmas eve from about 3yrs on they are in a xmas play at our church. We also have nativity scenes in our house, and an advent calender that my mother made. No chocolate advent calendars.

- Jazz on December 9th, 2008

Christ is the only reason Christmas is celebrated, and that’s what my daughter is taught. She knows the story of Santa, knows that others believe that he brings gifts. and is fine for them. She enjoys going to see him and have her picture taken with him every year. She knows that the spirit of Santa should live in all people and that we should make an effort to give joy and happiness to others. She also knows that I work very hard to provide to gifts she gets. I was raised like that and I raise my daughter the same way.

- Veroncia on December 9th, 2008

jaQ, what was your reason for not wanting your child to believe in Santa? I’m just curious about that, because it would never cross my mind. Thanks!

- Sarita on December 9th, 2008

Christmas for us is all about CHRIST so no Santa here.

I was however raised to believe in Santa and up until recently my 9 year old sister believed. She came to me when she was being teased in school for believeing and we talked about where Santa came from and how Jesus deserved all the glory for us to be able to give her the things that she wants for Christmas and not Santa and his elves.

- Blue on December 9th, 2008

Maybe it was because of the way I was raised, but I just find it silly to lie to your kids about Santa Claus only to have them be devastated a few years later when they find out that he doesn’t exist. I’m certainly not against Santa Claus as a character, my daughter has books and movies that portray him but she knows he is not real. I feel like thats the way it should be. I know my Christmases were special enough without believing in him. I certainly don’t hold it against other parents though for choosing to tell their kids that Santa is real.

- Sheena on December 9th, 2008

Well said Terri. I teach 10 and 11 year olds and the majority of them still believe! It’s fun and magical. That being said, I respect others who choose not to allow for make-believe and appreciate that they are teaching their children not to ruin the magic for others. A few students know the truth but “play along.” I can remember (being the oldest) when I knew and my siblings didn’t and it made me feel so grown up!

- brannon on December 9th, 2008

I grew up not believing in Santa, and we plan to have the same sort of Christmas for my son. While I always knew Santa wasn’t real, we still had soooo much fun with it anyway and it was great knowing it was all a big make believe that everyone took part in. We left cookies and milk and wrote letters and just had fun with it all because we were never serious about it. We want our son, now three, to have fun with it too, to know the story of the real Santa and to be a part of the make believe. The only problem is the hostility we’ve received with this decision. My mother said she received the same reactions, the “how can you take away the magic for them???” and the “you’re ruining Christmas!” and the “you’re so selfish to want credit for those presents!” It’s annoying, and a bit nonsensical for people to get so worked up over it since really people ought to be allowed to do whatever they think is best for their children. Honestly, I think the greatest thing I got out of not believing in Santa was that I had to learn tolerance and respect from a very early age as all my friends did believe and even though I knew they were wrong I still had to respect them and their choices and just hold my tongue.

- Megan on December 9th, 2008

Santa isn’t real?!?!

okay, lame joke.

i don’t have kids, but when i do i would not with hold letting them believe. when i thought santa was real, it really added to the magic of the season (though i never did catch on that santa had the same wrapping paper as my parents). for me, it really added to my childhood, so why deprive a child of that? unless, of course, religion is more important to you at this time of year, and that is fine. every parent is different. my parents just dropped the news one christmas, so i would definitely want to be a bit more sensitive the day they do find out he’s not real.

my nieces and nephew are still very young, and all still believe in him. i love seeing them get in to it, and joining them!

- morgyn on December 9th, 2008

I just want to add that I always link the religious side and the magical side. I teach my daughter that Father Christmas gives presents to remind little girls and little boys that the three wise men gave presents to baby Jesus. A lot of parents don’t bother to make the connection, but it’s important in my family. I’m sorry, but I fail to see how religion can’t be partnered at this time of year, by a magical being who enchants children. It is very important to me that my daughter (and any subsequent children I have) understands that Christmas is a time to celebrate Jesus’ birth, and we like to make Father Christmas a part of it. It makes her feel more involved in the relgious aspects, if anything. I’ve nothing against parents who don’t allow their children to believe, I just don’t think that it’s true to claim that you can’t have Father Christmas at the same time as celebrating the season religiously. The magic does not take away from celebrating Jesus.

- phoebe on December 9th, 2008

I do not have children yet but when I do, I will tell them about St. Nicholas the inspiration for the Santa Claus everyone knows today. I plan to continue the tradition of St. Nicholas with my children by helping the less fortunate through out the year as he did. Here is a great link that provides the history of St. Nicholas/Santa Claus: http://www.stnicholascenter.org/Brix?pageID=23

- Tara Prairie on December 9th, 2008

No, we do not teach our children to believe in Santa. Due to our personal beliefs we are very against that. Our children still feel the magic of Christmas – the magic of giving to others in need and the magic of celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ. They get presents, and even though they know they are from Mom and Dad it doesn’t make a difference. They know we give them gifts because we love them.

- Shawna on December 9th, 2008

Growing up, my family did not believe in Santa. My mother was a firm believer in not lieing to her children. My husband, however, did believe and now we have a new baby and the battle is on. I do not want to lie to my son. I want him to always trust that I will be straightforward and honest with him. My husband wants the magic and wonder of believing to pass to his son. I don’t want to stifle my son’s creativity or imagination but at the same time, I want to set a precedence that I will never lie to him.

- Kelsa on December 9th, 2008

My older brother was devastated when he found out Santa wasn’t real, and he demanded that my parents not “put me through” the same thing. So, I grew up knowing the truth, but still enjoyed Santa and did not ruin it for any other kids. My husband and I are going to do the same thing with our daughter (she’s almost 2), because we have made it a standard in our family to tell the truth no matter what, even about things like Santa.

You can still have TONS of fun with Santa even if you don’t believe he’s real — pictures at the mall (or Bass Pro Shops!), secret Santas, story books, etc. We have the same view about the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy — lots of silly fun, we’ll include them in our family traditions, but they will never be presented to her as real beings that deliver eggs or pay her money for teeth. That way it will be more of a game of pretend for her and not something that could potentially confuse her or make her question everything that comes out of our mouths for the next few weeks after she learns the truth (like my brother did to my parents!).

- amanda on December 9th, 2008

I don’t think that kids finding out the “truth” about Santa has to be crushing, by any means. I still believe in the spirit of Santa, the idea (however naive) that everyone shares in the joy of Christmas morning, and that we should work harder to make that a reality for everyone. The religious aspect is very important to me, but so is the cultural part of the holiday season–Santa and all.

- Caroline on December 9th, 2008

of course my kids believe in santa ( 5 and 3 )!! It’s a magical lovely, wonderful thoughtful time of year. I hope they believe forever.

- Gina on December 9th, 2008

This is a constant battle for me and my husband!!! He strongly wants them to believe and I don’t. They are still little (2 and 4) so as of now they do but as the questions keep coming I plan to tell them the truth. How do I some day break the news of Santa not being real but still expect them to believe me that God is real?

- Born Fab on December 9th, 2008

I think that when I have children, I will not tell them Santa Clause is real and that he is the one leaving presents.

I find the whole charade silly. Like so many earlier posts, in my opinion, the focus around Christmas time should be about celebrating the birth of Christ and not some mythical man who travels the world on his sleigh.

People talk about magic and such but to me, the Santa Claus myth is not essential to having a good Christmas.

Lastly, what purpose does it serve to lie children about where their presents come from. I think it is important for children to know at an early age that their gifts do not magically appear every year. Children should know that their parents have worked hard all year in order to provide new toys and that they should be appreciative because some families cannot afford any gifts.

- Di on December 9th, 2008

i personally will not tell my children that santa is real.
parents tell their children so many lies, and i feel that its very traumatizing when they grow up and figure out that the world isn’t a magical wonderland created only for them.
i will teach my kids that yes they are unique and yes they are special, but there is no such thing as magic and its up to them to make the best of this sometimes harsh world.

- h on December 9th, 2008

Santa is real. Santa is the spirit of the season, just as Jesus Christ is, or whatever else your beliefs are. Christmas is the one time of year that most people choose to be giving and celebrate their own meaning for the holiday.
“The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see” Francis P. Church

- Amber on December 9th, 2008

I don’t know anyone of my friends or even my friends’ kids who were “devastated” to learn that Santa wasn’t real. I didn’t think “my parents lied to me” and I didn’t “hate my parents” for letting me believe.

Santa is the spirit of giving and the magic of Christmas. Jesus wasn’t even BORN IN WINTER, it’s been proven that he was born in the summertime months. I’m all for celebrating His birth, but Christmas wasn’t originally started to do that. It was a pagan holiday adopted by the Christians..if I remember right.

At any rate, kids are forced to grow up SO fast these days and if believing in Santa lets my son be a kid longer, then so be it! I don’t feel that he’ll resent us for letting him believe.

There’s so much crap in the world today, believing in Santa and the spirit IMO, is at least one of the GOOD things!

- TracyG on December 9th, 2008

I remember my mother telling us that Santa Claus is the spirit of Christmas and that’s something I used with my own children. When we learned he didn’t exist it wasn’t a traumatic event. Now, as the kids are older we concentrate on the true meaning of Christmas and talk about St Nicholas and other aspects of the Holy day we celebrate in the context of our faith.

- Loralee on December 9th, 2008

My daughter just turned 4, and the other day, she said, “There is no Santa Claus, he is just make believe, like my imagination friend, Leo.” But she loves the holiday season. We go to church, so she talks more about the religious side to the holiday.

On the other hand, my almost 13 year old, still believed until 2 Christmas’ ago.

- karen10ason on December 9th, 2008

My son is 4 years old and he does believe in Santa, he’s always saying ‘ Je suis parfait pour Pere Noel Maman!’ he thinks that fat old man who flies around the world in one night delivering presents to good boys and girls is THE man! For me, Santa represents the very essence of humanity, the kindness of giving gifts to people who have earned it and to show goodwill. Yes, I know we are ‘lying’ about his existence but these innocent children are CHILDREN, and whilst we old boring adults are wrapped up in the worries of our lives, these children don’t have anything to worry about except what they’re having for dinner or whether they can stay up late to watch TV!
They grow up so fast which is scary! They should enjoy Christmases with good old jolly Santa and red nose Ruldoplh, while it lasts! It’s so great, magical and also traditional! There is absolutely NOTHING wrong in letting them believe. They need to have that kind of fun and excitement- so they can look back on their childhood saying, ‘ Christmas was so fantastic when I believed in Santa!’
The best Christmases are when you believe in Santa and his lovely reindeers!

- babyboopie on December 9th, 2008

I don’t yet have children, but with myself and my sisters we were allowed to believe. Finding out that Santa wasn’t real wasn’t devastating to me, it happened when my friend and I got back to school and were talking about Christmas. We eventually put two and two together that her Santa couldn’t drink eggnog because he was “allergic”, but mine loved it:) It didn’t matter though, we still put cookies and eggnog out for Dad every year until we graduated from college!!!

- Jill on December 9th, 2008

My sons are 4 and 2, and the oldest just started really asking about Santa this year. (We sort of just ignored it before.) I told him that Santa is just a story, and tried to explain a little about the original St. Nicholas (although, honestly, I don’t know much–guess I should look that one up.) Like many of the other commenters, we prefer to focus on the aspect that Christmas is when we celebrate Christ’s birth, but also don’t disparage anyone who likes to have Santa as part of the fun. I do feel a little uncomfortable, though, for example, when someone in the grocery store asks if Santa is coming or something like that. I just say, “We don’t do Santa, but we have presents from mom and dad and grandma and grandma, etc.”
To each his own . . . .

- Shelby on December 9th, 2008

Amber – very well said – I agree.

- Vivi on December 9th, 2008

I don’t have children yet but I have 3 nephews, a niece, and work in childcare. I love the magic of Christmas through a childs eyes! It’s how I keep my magic going as an adult!! I will def. keep the spirit of Santa alive for my kids just like my relatives do for their children. It’s about having something innocent to believe in even if it’s only for a short time. My niece and twin nephews are too young to really grasp the concept of the “real” meaning of Christmas but in due time they will.
When I was growing up my mom and dad always had seperate Christmas presents in seperate wrapping paper. Some were from Santa and some were from mommy and daddy and we could always know the difference.
I was six (maybe 7) when I found out about Santa (on my own) and although I was disappointed it never changed my feelings about having 6-7 wonderful years of make believe!! I grew up just fine and I do know the real meaning of Christmas and I now enjoy it through the other kids in my life. I couldn’t imagine growing up not having that experience. But to each their own. I guess what one family does isn’t always right for another and that’s respected.

- JM on December 9th, 2008

My son (who’s almost 3) calls Santa the Christmas Clown. He came up with it all on his own. I thought it was cute. I’m not sure how long I’ll perpetuate the Santa-myth with him. I had 4 older brothers so the idea of Santa was blown for me when I was about 4. On the other hand I don’t want him being a freakish child believing in Santa until he’s 12 either. I think it’s ridiculous seeing kids older than 10 waiting in line to sit on Santa’s lap to ask for presents. Just my opinion.

- Mari on December 9th, 2008

Born Fab – you bring up an excellent point!!!

- JM on December 9th, 2008

I always believed in Santa growing up and even now (Being 18 years old and my sister being 21) my mum and dad still ring little sleigh bells outside our bedroom doors on christmas eve and pretend that santa has brought our presents. I don’t think its silly or stupid at all to believe in santa, it adds to the christmas spirit and we all enjoy ourselves. Of course me and my sister know santa claus isn’t real now but its still nice to go along with it at any age.
My family aren’t religious at all and I don’t think my parents believe in god, but I do and I understand the religious side of this time of year and thats its the true meaning of christmas and I am grateful for the gifts I recieve on christmas day from family but at the same time my christmas wouldn’t be the same without the magic of santa claus and his sleigh and all.

- .x.drh.x. on December 9th, 2008

I don’t celebrate ‘Santa’. I live in the Netherlands and we celebrate ‘Sinterklaas or Saint Nicholas’.
The celebration is on December 5th. The funny thing is that each present comes with a rhyme. It is real fun for young people (who stil believe) and other people. When you’re older you wrap your present in something with a suprise element. For example if someone play’s soccer you can make is soccer ball and hide the present in the (self made) soccer ball.
And Christmas is just eating with family. And we (my family) go to church.

- froukje on December 9th, 2008

My husband and I do not teach our kids about Santa. We have a 4 year old and a 10 month old. I have no problem with others teaching their children about him but its not for us. My F-I-L asked my son about santa and he son responded “hes fake”, sure enough he thought we were wrong, but my hubby set him straight by saying “why should I lie to him”.. My sister on the other hand goes all out for santa. Giving my nephew special presents from santa, etc. She hasn’t taught him anykind of religous perspective for the holidays. Everyone has their own beliefs…

(lol sorry if what i said doesnt make much sense but im rushing)

- sara on December 9th, 2008

My four children (9,6,4, and 3) still believe in Santa. Although the 9 year old will not believe much longer I’m sure. We incorporate both Santa and Jesus into our Christmas rituals. Our children each get three presents from Santa and they know that it’s because Jesus received three presents when he was born. We read the Christmas Story on Christmas Eve and reenact the story with homemade costumes that the kids helped me make. I had such great memories growing up of Santa and the presents he brought that I wanted to make sure my children have fond memories of him as well.

- Shannon on December 9th, 2008

I don’t have kids but if I do there won’t be any belief in a strange fat man that lets himself into your house (I didn’t have a chimney so my parents told me Santa let himself in through the front door), at NIGHT, to sneak around and leave you stuff, and eat your food.

I remember that I figured it out around age 6, and the feeling when my parents confirmed that Santa was infact fake. I felt lied too. I didn’t believe a word out of their mouths for a long time.

Although I partake in the “Christmasy” season and decorate with a tree, I don’t celebrate it as a Christian holiday. I celebrate solstices and equinoxes.

I would not keep my children from watching tv programs that talk about Santa though, like cartoon specials. That’s all in great fun!!!

- AJ on December 9th, 2008

I believed in Santa when I was little. I honestly don’t even remember how or when I found out he isn’t real,but I know I wasn’t crushed. I was lucky enough that even with my brother being a year older than me and my sister being 9 years older,neither one ever told me Santa wasn’t real and try to ruin the fun of it for me. I think it’s fun to have something to believe in even if it’s only for a while. I plan to let my son believe in Santa for as long as possible.

- J on December 9th, 2008

My daughter is 8 years old and still believes, I will continue to let her believe for as long as possible. Because in my family Santa is real. He might not be the jolly fat guy that lives at the north pole that drives a flying sled with magical reindeers but he’s real in a sense that he’s a “magical” presense that knows if your naughty or nice and rewards you for your good behavior.
At Christmas in my family we (the parents) don’t get your christmas gifts – we provide for you all year long – they all come from santa. To this day all of my presents from my parents come from Santa ….. he’s real as long as you believe. Once you stop believing, Christmas just isn’t the same. Why ruin that innocent harmless magical fun for your child (IMO)?

There isn’t any harm in letting your child believe. I have never met anyone that hated their parents because they “lied” to them about Santa Claus.

- Bancie1031 on December 9th, 2008

My son is 7 and still believes in Santa! I absolutely LOVE that he believes and would never take that magicial experience away from him. We are Christians so I found that when I incorporated Santa and the baby Jesus it worked for my family. Santa brings 3 gifts to my boys (one is 13 and the other is 7) to symbolize the 3 gifts the wise men brought to honor the baby Jesus. This way, we still honor Jesus (the true meaning of Christmas) AND my 7 year old son gets to believe in a magical being called Santa. We only have the capability to believe in Santa for a few precious years and I feel it it would be selfish if I did not allow my children that experience.

- joey on December 9th, 2008

I believed in Santa for quite a long time, and I actually feel better for it! I have so many great memories and warm feelings of Christmas, and none of them were “ruined by finding out Santa wasn’t real. For me, by the time I was old enough that Santa had started to lose his “magic” I was old enough to understand that I wasn’t horribly lied to, that my parents had given me something magical to believe in for as long as I was young enough to. I plan to tell my kids there is a Santa Claus.

There is only thing thing I have bad memories of. My brother found out quite early there wasn’t a Santa Claus because some mean little kid the same age was going around announcing it to everyone he could find, and he was like 6 or 7. Ruined a bit of the magic for him, and pretty much his entire first grade class! I admire everyone who decides to do something different and still teaches their kids to respect others’ beliefs – you guys help keep the magic alive for others too, great job!

- Nicole on December 9th, 2008

I am just stunned at how many people think that it’s somehow Santa vs. Jesus. In our family, we were ALWAYS told the real reason for Christmas, and we had the nativity and read the Bible and watched “The Little Drummer Boy”. But we also learned that, in the way of Christ, Christmas is about giving. We all believed in Santa growing up, and it was magical. And yes, we all eventually learned the truth. In fact, I found out when I walked in one night and found the adults playing Santa because I woke up thirsty. But none of us were “devastated” — we’re happy, functioning adults who have a lot of fun staying up late to play Santa now to the younger kids. If you’re truly scarred by finding out the truth about Santa later in life, you have deeper mental problems going on.

- Michele on December 9th, 2008

Well I’m atheist so to me, forcing kids to believe in celebrating the birth of Jesus is just as ridiculous as forcing kids to believe in Santa. I say let kids believe in what they want. If they want to believe in Santa, let them. But I won’t be forcing it either way.

- Katie on December 9th, 2008

I am not a religious person and chose not to bring my children up in a religious setting. In my opinion, if they get to a point in their lives where they want to further their beliefs, that’s great. I’d rather have them decide for themselves when they’re old enough.

That said, I do talk about the the story of Santa, but on very simple terms. My eldest son, who’s now in the first grade, has brought up Santa’s authenticity a few times over the past month. With the holidays drawing near, kids in his class have started talking. I asked him what he thought and he replied, “Who knows?”

Although I allow them to believe in Santa, I don’t overdue it. It’s important for them to realize that the true meaning of Christmas doesn’t revolve are receiving but in giving throughout the whole year. Two weeks ago, I donated clothes from both of my boys to charity and had my eldest sort through his toys so we could give some to local organizations in the area that were asking for donations for Christmas.

Even though we don’t follow a set religion, I believe it’s highly important to teach my kids about others’ religious beliefs and how people around the world celebrate. So far, we’ve read about the celebration of Hanukkah and learned about the Maccabees and the signifigance of the Menorah. We live in a neighborhood with a large Jewish population so my son’s interest has definitely been sparked. A few of his friends practice Hasidic Judaism so he’s gone to many celebrations of the Sabbath. Likewise we talk about the celebration of Kwanzaa and the nativity story.

- Lily on December 9th, 2008

My children believe in Santa, but they know that the real reason for Christmas is Jesus. They got o Catholic school, we go to church every week, and so on. I believe that it is fine as long as your children know the real reason for Christmas, Santa is okay. And they always grow out of it. Also, Santa started with Saint Nick, so he is a Christian figure. I think that Santa does add a lot to the season and as long as your children know the real reason, it is fine.

- Mary on December 9th, 2008

I’ve never heard of a Jewish child who believes in Santa,I wonder how that works.

We’re Jewish too so my daughter knows it’s the parents who leave the presents for the kids but she has been very good at keeping it a secret.

- eva on December 9th, 2008

I’m from Southern Germany and we believe in St. Nikolaus (who comes on December the 6th) and the Christkind (Christchild) who comes on the 24th.
For us it’s not a decision between being religious or believing in these figures. We are Catholics and St. Nikolaus is a saint, so of course we celebrate this day. The Christkind is a symbol for Jesus who was born this day. The whole Advent and especially the Christmas day are magical, especially for children. They write a letter for the Christkind and put it on the windowsill. In our family they also put their old dolls there together with the letter and at night the christkind or one of the angel helpers get it. On the 24th the livingroom is closed because noone is allowed to see the Christkind and then in the evening when you hear the bell you know the Christkind was there. The moment when the livingroomdoor is opened and you can see the excitement and wonder in the kids eyes is one of my favourite moments of the year. They are so in awe that the Christkind has decorated the tree, put Jesus in the crip and put the presents (including the old dolls who got a total make-over including new clothes in the “angelsfactory”) under the tree. After the celebration we attend night mass and so religion and tradition goes for us hand in hand.
I just love the christmas time and would never want my children to miss out on this special magic.
Sorry for my English. It’s not my first language and I’m tired

- Ella on December 9th, 2008

My little cousin who turned five on November 14, was told by her mom and dad that Santa was dead. They are very christian and decide not to play into Santa. I don’t think that is right, but to each there own.

- Angela Lake on December 9th, 2008

I never really believed in anything growing up in Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, etc. Not even God. I am Atheist. I became Atheist this earlier year.

- Cheyenne on December 9th, 2008

I believe in Santa. Even today as an adult. lol I can’t remember at what age I learned the truth but I know I was proud to play Santa along with my parents for my younger brothers and sisters. I will always cherish the memories. I come from a large family and the older kids took over the charade for the younger ones. For me it was another way my parents chose to show their love for us by allowing someone other than themselves to take credit for something they worked so hard for. It was magical and Christmas would not have been the same without it. We were also taught that Jesus is the reason for the season. Merry Christmas to all, peace on earth, good will to me and Santa Baby, hurry down the chimney tonight.

- Rosy J on December 9th, 2008

Just curious….don’t want this to turn into a religious debate but growing up not so religious I just question these kind of thing and after it being brought up I’d figure I’d ask.

When one says they won’t “lie” to their kids about Santa because they don’t want thier kids believing in this myth of a man…what about GOD? You tell your children about him and explain who he is and what he created, perhaps you tell them to look to him for guidance, for comfort, etc. But in a way your asking your child to “believe” in something that also in their minds may or may not exist. Is that lying to them as well?? Shouldn’t they come to that conclusion on their own as well?

Because for me the day I do have children I will not shove religion at them. I will allow them to explore it if they so choose to. But I would not ask them to believe in something they cannot see if they don’t want to.

So I guess I just find it odd that it’s okay to believe in one thing but not another.

Like I said I just pondered this while thinking about this topic because it got me extremely curious hopefully I didn’t offend anyone with it was not my intent

- JM on December 9th, 2008

The ideas and thoughts on this board are incredible and very thought provoking.
As a Christian I do believe in God. By teaching my children about my faith I don’t feel I am shoving it on them or forcing them to believe. I find solace in my church and nothing is wrong with that. I feel as a parent I am doing the best thing for my family. If they choose as adults not to practice my faith or any faith at all that will be their decision. I will not love them any less. What is the difference between teaching them that God is a fairy tale or that God is your Saviour. It is all an unknown to all of us. They will ultimately make the decision on how to live their life and hopefully live according to what they believe as good people.

- Loralee on December 9th, 2008

I never did tell my kids about “Santa” I DO tell them that Christmas is jesus’s birthday,and we celebrate it by giving each other gifts,since we can’t give it to him personally. I used to believe in santa when I was a child. but after catching my mother putting the gifts under the tree, I learned there was No santa. I don’t lie to my children. to each their own though.

- dawn on December 9th, 2008

Yes, my children believe in Santa. It’s not right to flat out tell your children that Santa isn’t real. Let them have fun with Christmas. My husband and I made sure that our children know that Christmas isn’t just about Santa Claus and presents but, it is about the birth of Jesus. So, we let are children
believe that Santa is real. Eventually when they get older they will find out that he isn’t real; it’s better for a child to find out on there own than it is to have a parent tell their child that he is just made up. It is also a good way to get your children to behave, tell
them that Santa is watching them and if they are not good
they don’t get any presents from him.

- Joie on December 9th, 2008

we celebrate santa, the spirit of giving, love, family and friends during the holiday season… and except for santa – those things are around all year. we are happy for our daughter (7) to believe in santa.. really just to believe in magic – in purity of heart – in what could be.

we force so much on them, but when we allow them to believe in what they wish while they are young and full of wonder, i don’t see the harm.

i think the harm comes wen we as adults try to force too many of our own issues about these things (religion, magic, belief, etc..) onto our children.

when did believing in magic become such a bad thing? we have magic in the world of books – stories of unicorns, faeries, far off lands… we have movies where things just cannot be possible… we watch telly and see those same things.. we all know its “make believe” but does that stop us from getting excited about things (harry potter, LOTR, twilight, historical fiction, etc..)?

just let them be children and when they are grown and can think for themselves, let them be. your child will not be ruined if they learn santa isn’t “real”.. they will not hate you or be in therapy for years — if so, there are other issues in that family.. i understand those that do not due to religious or other personal belief so i’m really just talking here and obviously not going to “convert” you to magical thinking.. i’m just saying.. chill out..

i believe…

- michelle on December 9th, 2008

JM,

At least in my case, I do not expect my daughter to believe in God.She’s too young to ponder on theology and evidence of divinity.When she gets older and begins to make sense of the world in her own terms she may chose to believe or not,either way is fine.

I do, however, raise my child as an active member of my religious community.Why? because I think it has many good things to teach her for practical living,important things like respect for humanity and all living things,to seek peace and justice. It is also important for me to let her know who I am,where my values and hopes come from and who our ancestors were.Our religion connects her with past and future generations of her family.

Religious affiliations are an accident of birth.When she becomes a woman she will decide what to do with her heritage and how profound her faith is.For the time being she is Jewish,tomorrow who knows.

- eva on December 9th, 2008

I think it is ridiculous to say children will be traumatized when they find out Santa isn’t real–the presents keep coming, right?

My parents would leave one present for each of us kids unwrapped under the tree, and this was the sign it was from Santa. I’m 24 years old and I still ask my mother to leave one gift unwrapped so that I may spy it immediately and have that same old rush of excitement as I head down the staircase.

Parents tell their children all sorts of things, from myths to lies to vague versions of the truth. This is all based on age-appropriate language and information. It’s the difference between telling your four year-old that sex is “a special hug men and women have when they love each other very much” and telling your eleven year-old the real version.

Children figure out what is baloney and what is not, and I doubt any child will grow up emotionally stunted or reserved because his or her parents lied to them. I think parents saying, “I don’t want to lie to him” is more for their comfort than the child’s. Your children will be fine, let them imagine and explore.

- Vanessa on December 9th, 2008

JM,

I personally believe in God and Jesus. I was raised to believe. I have questioned it in the past during hard times. We go to church maybe 6 times a year or so; I personally believe that u don’t have to go to church to have religion inside of you. I don’t push it on her but here recently she has asked me if we can start going to church because she wants to learn more about God and Jesus along with Heaven and Hell, and I told her that we would. I’m pretty much letting her go about it at her own pace. We do celebrate Christmas. She does believe in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth fairy.
To me personally just because you can’t see something doesn’t mean that it doesn’t exist. You can’t see the wind – you might feel it but you still can’t see it …. you might see the trees blow and things like that but you can’t actually see the wind. And that’s what I teach my daughter – Just because you can’t see something doesn’t mean that it doesn’t exist.
We are Baptist, when she get’s older she can decide if she wants to continue to be a Baptist or not …. it’s her decision.
Christmas is about so much more than just Santa Claus and I want my daughter to know that also. That Santa is all about giving instead of receiving. All about Charity, love and not being selfish.

And No you didn’t offend me. Everyone has their own beliefs and to each their own. But I hope that this helps answer your question.

- Bancie1031 on December 9th, 2008

I have 5-year-old twins, but none of them believe in Santa. We’re Jewish, so we only celebrate Hanukkah. Last year they started to ask us why did Santa never came to them, so we told them the truth. We didn’t told them that Santa was fake, we just said that he was a Christian thing, and that instead of celebrating the birth of Jesus we celebrate Hanukkah, and that for Jewish children the parents play the role of Santa. They didn’t get disappointed at all, and they understand that Santa is just another religious tradition.

- Hannah on December 9th, 2008

I am agnostic with atheistic leanings. I still believe in the spirit of Christmas though. While I totally respect that for a great deal of people Christmas is about Christ (my whole family is Catholic), for me, the holiday season has just evolved into a season for peace, love, togetherness and giving, regardless of beliefs.
I am almost 25 years old and my parents and I still put “Love, Santa” or “Love, Mrs. Claus” on some of the presents, just for fun. When I have children of my own, I hope to take what I love about Christmas (charity, peace, togetherness with friends and family) and show and share that with them. If they choose to worship as Christians as they mature, and wish to celebrate the religious aspects of the holiday, then that’s fine. I just think that you can have that main message of christmas WITH Santa and religion, or even without it. HAPPY HOLIDAYS FOLKS!

- Aurora on December 9th, 2008

Can we just get something straight? December 25th is NOT Jesus’ birthday!

I’ve only seen one person here mention this FACT.
The FACT is, the exact date of Jesus’ birth is unknown, scriptures in the bible indicate early fall, possibly September. And I quote “When the Christ-child was born “there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night” (Luke 2:8). This never could have occurred in Palestine in the month of December. The shepherds always brought their flocks from the mountain sides and fields and corralled them not later than October 15, to protect them from the cold rainy season that followed that date.”

The truth is, christmas is a PAGAN holiday, not christian!

Pagan’s celebrated the birthday of the SUN-GOD, not SON of God. This pagan festival was so popular that the christians took it over and changed a few details, to gain popularity of their own.

NO WHERE in the bible does it say to celebrate the birth of Christ, and I would love it if someone could prove me wrong.

Now, that said, I DO celebrate christmas. I love giving gifts, the xmas lights, and being with family. But I also know that this is nothing more than a COMMERCIAL holiday [as is every other], and the “Christmas SPIRIT” is created each year, not to honor Christ, but to SELL MERCHANDISE!

- Paula on December 10th, 2008

Okay first of all before I do what I intended I want to make one thing clear. I don’t think its right for other religions to say “santa is fake” HES NOT..there was a real father Christmas so stop saying that. You wouldn’t like it if people ran around saying Hannukah is fake or Kwanzaa is fake. Second of all I am Christian/Catholic as well I and LOVED what Amber wrote! Perfectly said. Christ wasn’t born in the winter and he is only celebrated just like Santa Clause is around that time. To say that there is only one true person to be celebrated isn’t right either. Everyones beliefs hold the same meaning around this time..Giving and expressing love and caring for others. I love that we celebrate Christ’s birth but I also teach my children that this was the time it took for the wisemen to get to him. That although we celebrate his birth for Christmas its not the ONLY thing to be celebrated.

Posted by: Amber at Dec 9, 2008 12:26:58 PM
I don’t know anyone of my friends or even my friends’ kids who were “devastated” to learn that Santa wasn’t real. I didn’t think “my parents lied to me” and I didn’t “hate my parents” for letting me believe.

Santa is the spirit of giving and the magic of Christmas. Jesus wasn’t even BORN IN WINTER, it’s been proven that he was born in the summertime months. I’m all for celebrating His birth, but Christmas wasn’t originally started to do that. It was a pagan holiday adopted by the Christians..if I remember right.

At any rate, kids are forced to grow up SO fast these days and if believing in Santa lets my son be a kid longer, then so be it! I don’t feel that he’ll resent us for letting him believe.

There’s so much crap in the world today, believing in Santa and the spirit IMO, is at least one of the GOOD things!

THANKYOU AMBER!
A.J.

- *AJ* on December 10th, 2008

I agree with AJ and Amber.
When I have children, I will let my children believe in what they would like to believe in for as long as they want to believe in it.
I believe that Christmas is about humanity (giving to those less fortunate to us, mainly) and family, so it’s not religious or about legends for myself.

- Silvermouse on December 10th, 2008

Aww…I think it is so sad to not let children experience the magic of Santa.

I too, very strongly agree with Amber and AJ. I am SHOCKED at how many parents don’t want to “lie” to their children??!!! That is just plain stupid! All children I’ve ever known have believed in Santa and you can see the amazement and awe in their faces around this time of year… Why deprive children of the innocence of being children? They are only young once and part of being a child is their creativity and imagination.

That said, I have been through 12 years of Catholic school, so Christmas was always about Christ’s birth first, and Santa second.

- Lis on December 10th, 2008

Based on some of the comments, it seems like the adults care more about Santa Claus than children.

Some people seem to think that if you don’t allow your children to believe in Santa Claus you are somehow depriving them of an integral part of their childhood. It is amazing that some people would seem to believe that choosing not to tell your children about Santa is akin to telling them about war, death or disease.

Furthermore, I find it insulting how some people would want to equate Santa Clause-who does not exist (an obvious fact)- and Jesus Christ, a man, who died over 2000 years ago and an individual who Christians believe to be their Lord/Saviour and the son of God.

Lastly, there is nothing imaginative or magical about Santa Claus. It is one thing if a child imagined or made up Santa Claus, but if your parents tell you from day one that this person exists and that he brings gifts, where is the imagination in that.

- Di on December 10th, 2008

I have joyous, magical memories of once believing in Santa Claus. So, a part of me, wants my children to feel that same joy and magic. At the same time, I just can’t seem to stomach lying to them. Feels wrong.

- teenyz on December 10th, 2008

Pardon me for being historically correct but Santa Clause is based on a real character of St Nicholas or Father Christmas. It depends on where the story is told that it has changed or even been commericialized. To say that you are comparing him to Jesus is wrong and close minded. I am Christian and I DO BELIEVE IN CHRIST and its not about equalizing him to Jesus. Its about remaining open minded and allowing your children to choose what to believe in. NO one is saying that Santa Claus is equal to Jesus. They are saying that you shouldn’t be close minded to what your children are being taught. And if your going to say he’s fictional atleast give them the truth about who Father Christmas or St. Nicholas. Don’t tell them to believe in one thing and not give them the option to believe in others. Its the first steps our children have to understanding what FAITH really is. Its about believing in things you can’t always see.
A.J.

- *AJ* on December 10th, 2008

I did not believe in santa claus growing up but i still had an active imagination and x-mas day was still magical for me and my brothers because it was still a surprise in wondering what our parents got us. i don’t have any kids, but when i do i would probably tell them that santa doesn’t exist, but other kids may belive in him, so don’t ruin it for them, lol.

- jessie on December 10th, 2008

I have one that still believes (5) and one that is playing elf this year. My son is 7 and he broached the “santa” subject last month. He and I had a heart to heart on Santa and why it is important to keep the spirit alive for his sister. I have always believed that Sanata is in your heart and that is something I’ve passed on to my son. He is SO excited to be Santa’s elf. Christmas is about the magic of the seaons and the warm feelings that giving to the ones you love brings you. That is what makes Santa real.

- Little Mommy on December 10th, 2008

Mine are 3 and 6 and they believe in Santa. They also know it’s when we celebrate the birth of Jesus. We just try to make it a nice time of the year. We talk about giving to others who don’t have as much (food, toys etc) too.

- kris on December 10th, 2008

This year my husband and I have been thinking a lot more about what Christmas means to us and what we plan on teaching our children not only because we are expecting our first child but also because of how the financial crisis has hit our extended family. Here’s a few things I’ve come up with so far.

I just don’t think Santa/ Christ celebrations has to be mutually exclusive from each other and that being truthful to children means they lose the Spirit of Christmas.
I grew up in a large religious family and we all knew Christmas was about the Christ child. We never assumed that it WAS the day He was born, just the day it seemed convenient to celebrate it on. We knew our Russian friends celebrated in Jan. and other friends celebrated on other days. My entire childhood, Christmas was not about the DAY and presents but about ALL of the traditions (tree, cookies, music, church services, etc.) especially the tradition of being generous to those in need, like St. Nicholas did.

I think what needs to be defined is “what is the spirit of Christmas” and then we’ll get somewhere on how to handle the holiday for kids. It sounds like there’s a lot of intelligent parents here who know masses of gifts doesn’t convey a spirit of generosity, love, family togetherness, etc. but all one has to do is walk in to a store after Halloween and you’ll quickly get the idea that to many/most people in the western world believe the spirit of Christmas means buying junk so there’s more under the tree. To me, part of teaching kids about Christmas magic, is that it not just for kids and what kids get is the not the most important thing about the day. Why not teach them the magic of giving at Christmas- sneaking around giving to neighbors, grandma, daddy, baby sister? How is it stealing the magic of Christmas if THEY get to be Santa? I personally loved doing that when I was small.

So for my kids I think we’ll teach them the truth about Christmas but I think our focus will be on the spirit of generosity at Christmas. Like Christ, St. Nicholas, etc. and we’ll include any fun traditions specific to our nationalities.

P.S.- telling the truth about Santa is not the same thing as telling them the truth about sex. You tell them the “special hug” theory because it IS the truth in a way they are able to handle and you tell them more truth as they mature. This is also true when teaching them about God. You don’t lie to them at all, you tell them truth in way they understand and then tell them more as they mature.

- Rhiannon on December 10th, 2008

I agree totally with you JM!

- Nikki on December 10th, 2008

Ok, I am offended by the people that say we are bad parents because we allow our children to believe in Santa. So if that’s the case, does that mean that those that allow their children to believe in Jesus or Allah or whatever the religion is, that they are bad parents too because they believe in someone that you don’t actually see? Talk about holding your childs imagination back. If you don’t want them to believe in Santa.. don’t tell them he was non existant just say the guy is deceased.. Why not allow your child to believe in Santa but still know the REAL reason as to why we actually celebrate christmas. Its soo often that parents belittle their childrens imagination and force them to grow up too fast. Look what happens when we as parents take away the ability for our children to imagine and make believe. They grow so fast that at 17 they are acting the age of 30 and so on. We just need to slow them down and LET them believe in what is necessary so that we can further our childrens minds and let it expand. Because yes while your child will be down to earth and “smart” they will not have the ability to be something more then what you want for them. What ever happened to telling kids that they can be a princess if they wanted? Why is it that things today have changed from what they were years ago. Saint Nicholas DOES exist. His name is the basis of the “legacy” of Santa Clause. And why not TEACH your kids the purpose of Santa?? It does not mean presents and toys.. It means opening your heart and sharing what you may have.. to someone that doesnt have that? And the reason we expect kids to be good all year? Is because they should! Adding Santa int he mix.. just gives them a little extra incentive! I dont know about you all as parents, but when it comes to making sure that my kids are listening to what im telling them, then yes SANTA helps!!! Anyone offended by this posting? Im sorry but if you sit and say that you are a christian and judge MY parenting because of MY beliefs and what I allow my children to believe in? There is a saying that goes ” Judge not lest ye be judged” Remember that the next time you want to repost someting about my parenting because I chose to allow my kids to believe in Santa!!

- Helena on December 10th, 2008

My husband and I decided to let our son decide if he wanted to believe in Santa…so when asked whether he believed in Santa by my co-worker, my five year old said “Come on, a fat man bringing little kids toys, isn’t that a little sick? I don’t think Jesus will let a “peraphodile” in our house because Jesus love me” Needless to say, he doesn’t believe – and I have NO idea of where he heard the word “peraphodile” Kids really say the darndest things!

- Rylah on December 10th, 2008

Helena- I don’t see any post that says that you are a bad mom for letting your child believe in Santa. With all these posts maybe I missed it though???? There are however posts that say that parents that don’t let their child believe in Santa are hurting their childs imagination/creativity. And some even act like we are making our children grow up faster because we chosoe to not let them believe. Is there some study on this where you girls have gotten your info from?

To posters that state that Jesus was not born on Christmas, you are 100% correct. That does not mean however that we can’t choose to celebrate his birth and on the Christmas date. Most of us (if not all) know where Christmas originated from (pagans) and we celebrate it in a way that we see fit with our religion. If we don’t think that Santa should be part of that there is nothing wrong with that just as there is nothing wrong with if we do.

- Blue on December 10th, 2008

I grew up knowing that there was a santa once but he died-so now we celebrate the tradition. The truth is always best if you want your kids to believe you when they get older.

- Terri on December 10th, 2008

We’re Jewish so we don’t plan to tell Anya stories about Santa, but we took a ride on the Santa train with Christian friends last week so Anya learned what he looks like. (She had seen him at the mall and asked who that “guy” was.) So now she recognizes that the man with the “big beard” and “big tummy” wearing red and white is called Santa but she has no idea that he brings gifts. She’ll probably learn through cartoons, but not at school, which is a temple-based preschool.

As Jews, I think we’ll probably tell her that Santa brings presents to some families but in our house, Mama and Dada bring the presents. This is the first year she gets the idea of birthday presents but doesn’t know about Hannukah yet.

As far as I know, Judaism has no mythical figures, perhaps with the exception of Elijah who visits every Jewish home during Passover and you’re supposed to set a special wine glass for home (why is there no Elijah train?). Hannukah is actually a minor holiday that has been elevated to this popularity because of it proximity to Christmas.

- Danielle on December 10th, 2008

“I don’t think its right for other religions to say “santa is fake” HES NOT..there was a real father Christmas so stop saying that. You wouldn’t like it if people ran around saying Hannukah is fake or Kwanzaa is fake”

We don’t run around telling people that Christmas or Santa Claus is fake.When I told my daugther that Santa Claus’ presents are from parents and family and that there’s no man living in the north pole with a toy factory and elfs I did tell my child to keep that information to herself and let her friends believe in it.I CLEARLY told her that it is not up to her to decide what kids should believe on and as far as I know she has been quite respectful of it.

Santa Claus,the guy on the red suit who travels around the Christian world leaving presents is not real.Why should I tell my child otherwise?I however,believe that Christmas is an important holiday for many people I care about and love, Me and my family are very sincere when we wish people a merry Christmas.

As for runing around telling people that Hanukkah and Kwanza are not real,it’s your prerogative.I’ve never implied that Christmas is not real and I do not intend to do it.

- eva on December 10th, 2008

I grew up believing in Jesus and Santa. One of my friends growing up had one of those cheapo mothers who didn’t think it was worth all the fuss…her kid told me and all my friends the truth when we were prob in the 1st grade but luckily the 4 of us and our parents said that Hollys mom was lying and that there really was a Santa. We all believed until probably 3rd grade when people got to talking at school. I asked and my parents told me the truth then, but secretly I still believed for another year or so more until my parents asked me to to help wrap my brothers presents.

I wasn’t devastated it’s just another progression into growing up. I didn’t feel I was lied to, it was something that kept the holiday fun. Christmas isn’t the same when you don’t have little kids that still believe in your house. There are no little kids left in my family so now christmas is just about presents, food and family.

I will let my kids believe in santa, I remember the magic, of it. We live in NJ and we’d go to my aunts house in NY on xmas eve…I couldn’t wait to get home so santa would leave me presents.

I had many close calls growing up…I guess I wasn’t the brightest kid…I found a toy wrapped up in the attic in the middle of summer – my parents told me santa must have forgot to give it to me. I also always wondered how Santa got in my house….we have a chimney but no fireplace.

I’ve always been amazed at the the jewish and jehova witness kids in my classes growing up, they always kept it a secret for all us other kids. They never let on that they knew the truth about Santa. We all know how hard it is for little kids to keep a secret.

I think nowadays Santa for many is a character like Mikey Mouse and Barney. I remember one christmas at a local mall a muslim woman dressed in full islamic clothes let her kids go up and take a picture with Santa.

I’m just so amazed at how many parents tell their kids the truth from the beginning.

- chicakms on December 11th, 2008

Eva if you are maybe speaking on everyone’s behalf and say “we” you need scroll up several individuals posted that they had told their children Santa was Fake.

“Posted by: phoebe at Dec 9, 2008 10:14:30 AM
no santa here. my children are 2.5 and 5 years old, and i have told them from the beginning that there is a character called Santa that many children and their parents like to have fun with at christmas-time, but that it’s all pretend”

“Posted by: Lis at Dec 10, 2008 9:46:27 AM
Furthermore, I find it insulting how some people would want to equate Santa Clause-who does not exist (an obvious fact)- and Jesus Christ, a man, who died over 2000 years ago and an individual who Christians believe to be their Lord/Saviour and the son of God.”

NOW as a Christian Catholic I am offended because Saint Nicholas did in fact exsist and yes he has become commericialized but there is an actuall person that did exsist. (Santa Clause is coming to town movie is based on it!) So don’t tell me there is no one running around saying he is fake. Im sorry but if you expect a child to understand that you telling him/her that Santa is fake and NOT giving him/her the full history of who it actually is then how do you expect them to realize that it isn’t ignorant to believe that there was no one ever like that, that had exsisted. Thats my point. Its insulting to people who celebrate St. Nicholas who happens to be celebrated on the same day of Christs’ birthday. No one is saying he is equal we are saying that two people should be allowed to share a celebration on the same day. And they shouldn’t be judged on importance or whether your celebrating one more than the other. For people to say there should only be Christ celebrated is insulting to the rest of the people who come from different religons and its ignorant to not be respectful of their beliefs. Whether I celebrate Hannukah or not I don’t think I have the right to tell my children that the Jewish holiday isn’t regonized and they aren’t Jewish so they don’t have to be respectful about that. Santa Clause is recognized by several religions and to say he’s fake is very rude, and insulting. You find it insulting that we don’t celebrate only Christ but if you are insulted that we don’t follow your religion then maybe it is not you who really should be insulted. In this world we have to learn to respect everyone’s beliefs and by teaching children that he is non-existant or “not reall” and not educating them on why people believe in him (basing him on St. Nicholas) then you are really not keeping your childrens minds open to this world. My husband is a Marine and deployed several times to Iraq. My 7 year old asked several things about Iraqi people to my husband. And rather than him say oh they just celebrate a religon we don’t believe in, he educated her on why they wear the “funny clothes” as she put it and why they talk about Allah and who he is to them. Its about exposing your children not closing them in to one thought process because it happens to be the one you believe in.
A.J.

- *AJ* on December 11th, 2008

Our family does not do Santa, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, etc. Our personal stance is that if children are told that these things are true, and then find out they are not real, how are they going to eventually believe that God is real, and not just made-up? We feel that the commercialism over these holidays is part of the reason for the rising rate of atheism among teens. But we are also respectful of those who choose to do the Santa thing.

- seosinger on December 11th, 2008

AJ – That was NOT my post that you have quoted. That was Di’s. My post is ABOVE my name… I AGREE with you!!! That is what I said

Just wanted to clear that up! I think it’s important for children to beleive in Santa! It makes Christmas special!

- Lis on December 11th, 2008

My girls (8 and 3) Still believe in Santa. I think its great for them to believe in something so nice. When my girls get scared from the tunder we tell them its Santa moving all the presents around and they love it. It calms them immensly

- Jackie on December 11th, 2008

We don’t lie to our children.
So no, we won’t tell them that santa is watching them so they better behave.
We are christians, and don’t celebrate christmas, because it is rooted in paganisim. Everyday is about remembering and bringing glory to Jesus!

- Kerry on December 11th, 2008

Maybe we can take a poll on how many people who grew up believing in Santa actually felt they were lied to as well as those who felt traumatized by learning he did not exist?? It would be interesting to see!!

Bottom line is I think most will agree that Christmas is more then just about a fat guy in a santa suit from the north pole. For me it’s about giving to others and being with family. We do not celebrate the birth of jesus since we don’t come from a relgious family but we do celebrate health, happiness and family. We celebrate getting together, having fun, laughing, and enjoying each others company. That for me is greater then any gift you could ever receieve!

Happy Holidays CBB!!

- JM on December 11th, 2008

Saint Nicholas/Santa is definitely real… he lives in the hearts of mothers and fathers and is the embodiment for the spirit of giving.

And this is what I will explain to my kids when they are older and ask if he is truly real.

My kids, 8.5yrs, 7yrs, and 4yrs old all believe in Santa.

They will be taught the history behind the legend when they get older.

BUT… they also know that this is Jesus’ birthday and the religious aspects, too.

I don’t see why one has to cancel out the other for us… I can see how it might need to for others, though, as I know each church’s rules are different.

But even while waiting in line to see Santa, when asked by the worker if they were excited about Santa coming with presents, my 8.5yr old immediately (with no prompting) replied, “Yeah, but it’s also Jesus’ birthday, so I want to celebrate that!”

She was almost as proud and amazed as I was.

I’ve also started talking to my two older ones about Hanukkah and Kwanzaa… but they’ve learned at least a little from school and from holiday specials. Still, I want them to know about Hanukkah as it is old testament and part of Christian history, too.

I will teach them what Kwanzaa is, too, because they need to know what traditions are celebrated in different cultures.

It is why I would teach them about Hanukkah and Passover, even if it was not related to our own beliefs.

My kids do believe in the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, leprachans, though the last is because, much as my own preschool did, their preschools started the belief by having them find “gold” (gold wrapped chocolate coins) on St. Patrick’s day

I think childhood is a special time and they should be able to, allowed to, and encouraged to embrace beliefs in magic.

- Kat on December 11th, 2008

Well AJ then I suggest you read my post with more care,because I did point out that I expect and teach my child to be respectful of Christmas.I have not told my child the story of Saint Nicholas because she has shown to interest on it,but since my family comes from Russia it might come up eventually.She is encouraged to ask questions about any religion or belief she is interested on.Our neighbours across the street are Muslim and she has gone to the Mosque many times. She has also been to Christian Orthodox weddings.
All I said is that she knows that the presents under the Christmas tree come from the parents and that there is no toy factory in the north pole.Christmas is very real to many people around the world,and Santa Claus as a popular figure and a childhood belief is respected at my home.If this offends you well that is that.

- eva on December 11th, 2008

You stated that “we” don’t run around telling people that Santa Clause is fake Eva. But then if you read previous posts which I threw up (sorry bout that lis!) showing that parents were in fact informing their children that Santa was fake. Period no discussion in who he was based on, and that there was a real person that did in fact deliver presents to children and do more than that. Thats what I meant. Several religions believe in St. Nicholas and for you to tell your children that Santa Clause isn’t real and not inform them is just as bad as other people that say well Im not Jewish, or I don’t recognize Jesus so they aren’t real. Im sure you don’t like it when some atheist tells their children that Jesus isn’t real. That you feel the same way that I do about parents in here saying I told my children he is fake he never exsisted. Thats not true he did in fact exsist. Maybe not the way that he is now commercialized but St. NICHOLAS DID EXSIST and Santa Clause is based on him so why not just give your kids the real story and not just OH hes not real, just to some people.
A.J.

- *AJ* on December 12th, 2008

i am 26 married with a 3 month old son and I still believe! i will not tell him when he is older he’ll figure it out for himself. none of us ever asked my parents if santa was real as we got older we just assumed so, but when i wake up christmas morning i still get presents in “santa” writing and i still look up for in the sky for the sleigh, its all part of the magic. i know there is more then santa at christmas but its fun to believe its just like i prefer to say merry christmas instead of happy holidays! why is everything such a big deal now and it wasnt 20 years ago?

- Sarah on December 12th, 2008

I’m curious about whether or not the people who feel they are lying to their children allow for any make-believe? Do you ask Mickey to take his head off in Disneyworld? Explain that Elmo is just a puppet someone is controlling? Do you think kids are devastated or crushed when they find out barney isn’t really a loveable dinosaur but a man named Bob who wears a funny costume for work? Just trying to figure out where the line is drawn. Religious beliefs I get but I am struggling with the concept of “lying.”

- brannon on December 12th, 2008

In my family growing up we had a healthy balance. Christmas didn’t begin until the weekend before (around the 20th) and we put the crib up. Then we decortaed the house, equally with religious decorations and Santa stuff. And I as a child always made a point of making a birthday cake for Jesus and leaving it out at the crib on Christmas Eve.

There were 7 children in our house and we all believed in Santa but knew he was just a little part of Christmas, I even believed for a while that because Jesus was so generous he got his “friend” Saint Nick to give us presents for His birthday. What I am trying to say is that believing in Santa does no harm, if you want your children to respect the real meaning of Christmas it can be done but it is your responsibility to make sure it happens.

On a seperate point, I have no children but I work in a nursery where the whole class of 3-5year olds are looking forward to his visit, and I babysit younger cousins, of whom the 11 year old is at the point of hinting that she knows something but accepts it delightedly when older people say they believe in santa. (Which has to be done when you are in a room with wee younger ones.) Saying all that my 29 year old brother came home last Christmas Eve and tried with all his heart to convince me and my sister that Santa is real. And a little bit of me will always believe lol

- Daisy on December 12th, 2008

A little on the late side of leaving a post here but oh well haha

My kids (10,6,5,2) were allowed to believe in Santa Claus as my husband and I aren’t very religious. I love the idea of the magic and make believe of Santa. Being young is the only true time you can believe in something wonderful and innocent, and something we as adults know can never be real. And just the purity of the idea and the sparkle in their eyes when you say his name. It is something amazing and wonderous. And to me believing in Santa just shows the innocents and imagination of being a child.

I don’t think finding out Santa is real is tramatic or damaging to a child. My son who is the oldest came to me when he was 8 at around christmas time. With a more serious look on his face then I’d ever seen. He asks me “Mommy some kid at school said that Santa wasn’t real” I knew that this day was coming eventually, I had hoped it would be a little longer but that’s life, so my husband and I were prepared. Instead of lying to him and saying the kid at school was lying and not to believe him. I sat him down and explained to him that yes that the Santa Claus that flys around in the sky wasn’t real. And it was just a make believe story, but that it was still told and we celebrated ] to help remind people to be kind and give to others. And Santa might not be real but his spirit is in our hearts. He never had a tramatic experiance with find out out he wasn’t real and he accepted the explaination and he stil helps his little brothers and sister to celebrate and now he gets to see the magic I see in their eyes whenever we talk about Santa

- Sasha on December 12th, 2008

We teach our children NOT to lie and then lie to them, using the excuse of a holday that started out as a pagan festival, then turned it into a so called christian holiday that promotes greed. No I tell my kids the truth and they trust me, what a consept.

- Darla on December 13th, 2008

We teach our children NOT to lie and then lie to them, using the excuse of a holday that started out as a pagan festival, then turned it into a so called christian holiday that promotes greed. No I tell my kids the truth and they trust me, what a consept.

Posted by: Darla at Dec 13, 2008 1:02:54 AM

Im sure you also tell them not to believe the people who believe in Santa because their parents taught them lies as well? And Catholics must be pagans then because we have believed in St. Nicholas aka Father Christmas aka SANTA CLAUSE for much longer than the “pagan holiday” as you put it. Do you also tell them that god is fake? Because no one can see him or hear him and if they claim to then they are liars? Its really sad how people look at the idea of Santa Clause as Lying rather than trying to look at it as something magical. Its not about LYING to your child its about teaching them that sometimes you can’t always see something but it doesn’t mean its not there. And FYI my daughters trust me. And I trusted my parents I didn’t think “oh now I can’t trust them because they lied to me”…I thought well they wanted to teach me a value as a child and they gave me a wonderful way to learn it. Its about GIVING TO PEOPLE…So don’t sit there and insult parents saying Oh we don’t lie to my childre about a pagan turned christian holiday and they trust us. You can’t say that will always happen. Children lie its something they ALL do throughtout their childhood its teaching them that they don’t have to lie and they can trust that we have to continue to do. BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN THEY STILL DON’T TRY PERFECT MOTHER DARLA. By the way all of you who do look past the “paganism” holiday I hope you will take an oppurtunity to find your local Toys for Tots and donate. Being a wife of a Marine Im kind of partial to those new Santa’s who continue to carry out his work dressed in blue!
Semper FI
A.J.

- *AJ* on December 13th, 2008

Well Im going to teach my Children Santa Claus and Im going to LIE as Darla put it and Im going to give my children a wonderful GREEDY Christmas and let them enjoy every aspect about it! And PS All children lie at one point! No matter if you LIE about Greedy Pagan Christmas Santa Claus or NOT!
MERRY CHRISTMAS DARLA

- *AJ* on December 13th, 2008

Here is a history lesson for those that think we are lying to our children…

Saint Nicholas is the patron saint of sailors and is often called upon by mariners who are in danger of drowning or being shipwrecked. In Germany survivors of shipwrecks traditionally brought patches of sailcloth to Saint Nicholas as votive offerings. According to one legend, as a young man Nicholas went to study in Alexandria and on one of his sea voyages from Myra to Alexandria he is said to have saved the life of a sailor who fell from the ship’s rigging during a storm. In a colourful version of this legend, Nicholas saved the man on his voyage back from Alexandria to Myra and upon his arrival took the sailor to the church. At that time the previous bishop of the city had just died and the church fathers were instructed in a dream to choose for their next bishop a “man who conquers” (Greek: nikei). While the saint was praying, the loose-lipped sailor went around telling how courageously he was saved by the man Nikei-Laos, upon which the church elders had no choice but to elect Nicholas as their new bishop.

So, I guess that we are MAKING this up? If that’s the case.. I will continue to “lie” to my kids if that means that they have smiles on their faces when they wake up on Christmas Morning to see the tree full of presents. Oh, but don’t worry.. We might put up our pentacles right before we head out to Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve. Since according to your logic, we are celebrating a Pagan Holiday. Merry Christmas to you all!! And remember, he knows when you are being good or bad!

- Helena on December 13th, 2008

Here’s a question for all the parents who think letting your children believe in Santa Claus and going along with the hoax of it is lying to them. Do you have trust issues with your parents? Do you look back on your time believing in Santa and think OH Jeez my parents lied to me. How could they I can never trust the person who has taken care of me and loves me again! Because to me it just seems to be a little irrational to think that is how someone would react and feel to this day.

- Sasha on December 13th, 2008

I’m only 17 now and I don’t plan on having kids for a while, but I’m not sure what I will do when I have kids.

When I was younger somedays I believed and somedays I didn’t. I remember going around when I was six saying that I don’t believe in Santa and that there was no way one person could go around the entire world in one night. I said this in front of my 3 and 4 year old brothers. One christmas when i was maybe 4 my grandpa in Ireland called and said that Santa was on his way. I told him to get a life because Santa wasn’t real.

- Maire on December 13th, 2008

Funny! Santa Doesn’t Exist-But I can’t Read, So it’s okay shirt.

http://www.zazzle.com/funny_santa_claus_kids_shirt-235474411020878966

- j Redd on December 13th, 2008

Help the Boys in Blue play the Man in Red this holiday please! Take a time to give to all those children who otherwise wouldn’t have anything. Im sure some of you consider it crazy and greedy for them to hope someone will bring them something special! But I am hoping most of you will take the time to help out Toys for Tots this year whether you believe in the Man in Red or not Please show you support out Men in Blues! Especially out in Suffolk where there Warehouse was completely emptied by theives.
Semper Fidelis and Merry Christmas!
A.J.

- *AJ* on December 13th, 2008

Wow, that thread is one of the most inspirational posts I’ve read on this site. So thoughful that I’ve become to realise something… Believing is really important to adults, whether the reality is true or just imagination. So I have this feeling: would God be a Santa Claus for adults? Think about it…

- caroline on December 14th, 2008

I don’t have kids yet but I’m torn about this. I believed in Santa up until I read in a book that he wasn’t real. I was only 7 years old and I was an advanced reader so I was given books at school that were normally given to grade six students. I even talked to my teacher about it. I didn’t want to disappoint my family either so I pretended I still believed. Christmas was never the same after that so I think that if you have other traditions that get you and your family into the spirit Santa can easily be ignored.

- halifaxhoney on December 15th, 2008

I believed in santa until I was 14 and I still do in away, I know he’s not real, but I still believe and I also have nieces and nephews so I go along with it. And when I do have kids they will believe in santa for as long as they want. when we were kids we believed in santa and we also made banners that said happy birthday Jesus and we knew the real meaning also.

- Jenna on December 16th, 2008

I don’t think it’s right to tell children about Santa, the Tooth Fairy or the Easter Bunny. Now, when I was little my parents told me about Santa and all that, but when I grew old enough to recognize my moms handwriting, I knew the gifts weren’t from Santa, I was 6. Easter was ruined for me when I caught my dad hiding the eggs the same year. I knew the Tooth Fairy was bogus when I lost a tooth I never told my parents about when I was 7. I wanted to know if they were behind that too, or if the Tooth Fairy would come anyway, cause she would know, even if I never said anything to mom and dad. Of course, no money under the pillow.

I will say that I didn’t feel emotionally scarred for life, or anything like that, but I didn’t like being lied to. For a while, I did wonder what else they lied to me about, and I was a bit non trusting, but I got over that. It was still fun for me to pretend to believe for my younger brothers. However, I don’t plan on telling my children those fictional characters exist, but mostly, I don’t like all the consumerism that goes along with the holidays.

Every year millions of people get stressed out, try to do too much, go into debt and spend more and more on gifts for their kids, who I have watched become more and more greedy and less thankful for what they have. There is nothing wrong with children having a healthy understanding of the Santa myth, and celebrating the birth of our Savior, but I believe children should also realize that the gifts they get are from their parents who work very hard all year. Young children don’t have a concept of money, but as a child gets older, financial limits should be put on their expectations of gifts. Have them make a list, sure, but they should make a notation of a few of the things they really really want. (like 3-5 things, within the budget) Make sure to get those, and your golden. Everything else is a bonus. Christmas morning should be about more than just the gifts. By placing the focus of the day on non gift traditions, more memories are created that last a lifetime. Who remembers every toy they got from “Santa” every year anyway? They will remember singing carols, drinking cocoa by a fire, watching the Christmas movies on Hallmark, doing a toy or food drive, making cookies to give to the Sr. Center, or hundreds of other things you could do, instead of trying to find a way to make lying to your kids fit into the budget.

I mean seriously, by lying to your kids about what toys Santa will bring them and having them make a list, does not teach them a darn thing, except that Santa can bring them whatever they want, no matter how much it costs. Parents kill themselves and destroy their budget to get the kids every darn thing on the list and if the kids don’t get it, the parents then feel guilty if they didn’t have enough money to spend. What a horrible feeling to have on Christmas morning.

Instead of focusing on all that a child “gets” each year, I think helping a child to be mindful of others, charitable, giving, gracious and kind (not only during the holidays) for Christmas are far better and longer lasting gifts the give them.

- Kat on December 17th, 2008

hi yes i have a 5 year old little boy called George he believes in santa i think its important for children to use their imagination and this time of year helps children use that imagination and believe in the magic that is christmas
xx

- jessica hurcombe on December 17th, 2008

I agree w/ Tracy G.—I do not remember being devasted finding out about Santa ( i think i was 10 yrs old!) I went back & forth with the notion for a while but finally conceded that I guess it was impossible for one man to deliver toys to the entire world in one nite!
I still swear I heard sleigh bells while laying in bed a few of those 10 years.
Anyway my son has asked the same question that I asked my father — how does Santa & the reindeers do it…I told him it’s magical just like my Dad told me! but some of you posters are making me worried
that I will scar my son for life by letting him believe.
I think everyone needs to read/see The Polar Express…to me it represents the innocence of our kids which doesn’t last long. I am just going to hold a bell to my son’s ear every year and let him tell me when he doesn’t hear it anymore:)

- Alex on December 18th, 2008

I think children who are “devastated” to learn that Santa isn’t real are told too early. If your kids start believeing, let them believe, they will grow out of it and won’t be devastated. Once, I just asked my mum “are you the tooth fairy?” and she just said “yeah”, I was disappointed but it was good to have fun and believing!

Kat, kids can believe in Santa and not expect him to buy them every expensive thing they ask for. My parents always told me that Santa had lots of work and that he would pick only a few gifts and sometimes think of some of them himself. It kept the surprise instead of knowing everything I’d get =)

- Alice on December 20th, 2008

As a child, I remember being scared of Santa. We didn’t have a fireplace, so when I asked how he came in, my parents said he had keys to the front door. I was always scared he was going to loose the keys and someone could come in!!!!

- Gabrielle on December 20th, 2008

We have three children ages 26, 22 and 9. Since we had our first christmas with our first child, as a family we get together and bake what we call a “baby Jesus cake” to remind us all that it is Jesus birthday we are REALLY celebrating. We encouraged all our children to still believe in Santa but in the sense that there are good people everywhere, not just Santa. Santa is a helper both to parents and all good people alike. The fact that some people don’t have chimneys for Santa to come down, no problem… This is a time for miracles and our children were reminded that when they see the faces of people who receive gifts that they did not expect, this is the work of Jesus, Santa or whomever takes on that role at that time. They were encouraged that some day they to can be a “santa”, etc. They were never disapointed over the whole Santa thing because they always knew in their hearts that good people are everywhere, everyday, not just Christmas. I feel it helped prepare them to be loving, kind people and our older children have the biggest hearts in the world. They have gone out of their way to help others all year long.

- Ruthie on December 24th, 2008