Mom & Babies

Kristy Swanson on nannies, nursing, and negative rumors

05/21/2008 at 05:08 PM ET

0SHARES

Reprint

Actress Kristy Swanson, who you may know as the original Buffy the Vampire Slayer, recently spoke with the Hot Moms Club about a number of topics close to her heart. As mom to Magnus Hart, now 15 months, Kristy shared what she has learned since welcoming her son. She is proud to say that she and Lloyd Eisler handle the majority of childcare themselves, unlike many other celebrities.

I pride myself on the fact that Lloyd and I do not have a nanny and we raise Magnus on our own. Yes, of course we have baby-sitters when needed adult time, but no live-in, live-out nanny.

Kristy, 38, also discussed her disappointment in the pregnancy and breastfeeding books she read. As a mom who wanted to nurse (and did so successfully for 5 weeks), Kristy felt the books focused on the mechanics of breast and bottle feeding, but failed to describe the emotional aspects. Looking for support and an explanation and reassurance of her feelings of guilt and exhaustion, Kristy instead found none. She revealed that it would have been more helpful had the books taken a realistic approach, and passed on her own advice.

It was a real problem for me and I felt like there was something wrong with me. None of the books ever told me of the feelings I would get if I was unable to nurse. It is not a bad thing and is not for everyone.

Just how hard it is to be able to function properly and be nursing your newborn every 2-3 hours? It was amazing just how dependent my baby was on Lloyd and I. [Be sure] to make time for yourself and rest when your baby rests!

Click below to read how Kristy addresses hurtful rumors about her and Lloyd’s relationship.

When Lloyd and Kristy — who had won Skating With Celebrities in March — announced their pregnancy in August 2006, it was met with a whiff of scandal. Lloyd, an Olympic bronze medalist, had formally separated from his wife Marcia in November 2005; at the time, she was in the third trimester of her pregnancy with their second son. During the delay from the time of taping to the press blitz for the airing of the show, Kristy and Lloyd became more than friends — and not a moment before, Kristy stated.

We taped from August to October 2005 and then the show aired in [January] 2006. They’d separated before this time, but the way it was reported, it sounded like I’d caused the separation. During the time apart, I realized how much of an impact Lloyd and made in my life, so I was happy to see him again.

The couple plan a 2009 wedding.

Source: Hot Moms Club; Photo courtesy of Kristy.

Photo taken by Beth Moser Photography.Beth is offering to waive the sitting fee (a $150 value) for readers ifyou mention CBB. She is based in the Los Feliz, CA area. Prints andproducts are regular price.

For more on Kristy, visit KristySwansonOnline.com

Wow
Funny
Love
Sad
Angry

Previous Story Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt at Toys R Us

Next Story Christina Aguilera on pregnancy, fitness, nursing and motherhood

The Latest

Pets

Clingy Tortoise Stalks Pit Bull Crush All Over the Yard (VIDEO)

TV Watch

The Walking Dead Recap: Meet Deanna Monroe

People Premium

Cover Story: Kelly Clarkson Shares How Motherhood Has Changed Her

Which Downton Characters
Need to Hook Up? Joanne Froggatt Weighs In

Will This 30-Something Woman Get Alzheimer's? Inside Her Decision – and the Results

Add A Comment

PEOPLE.com reserves the right to remove comments at their discretion.

Comments + Add a comment

Showing 13 comments

melanie on May 21st, 2008

I have to agree with her some of her comments about breastfeeding. No one told me how exhausting, painful, and emotional breastfeeding is for the first several weeks. People tend to focus on positive aspects of it: bonding and nutrition. It is not easy and new moms need to know this. This being said, if you can wait out the tough time, it is worth it in many ways.

Katie on May 21st, 2008

I agree about the breastfeeding. My son is 4.5 months and I am breastfeeding full time, but the first couple weeks were a nightmare. I was tempted to give up and use formula, but with a lot of tears and encouragement from family I stuck to it and made it work. I was displeased with most literature and with the lactation consultants in the hospital for all the pressure they put on the mothers. I would have figured it out myself if they wouldn’t have constantly been grabbing at me and checking on me. I know it was to make sure the baby got the nutrition he needed, but for me personally it was way too much.

Molly on May 21st, 2008

“It was amazing just how dependent my baby was on Lloyd and I.”

Well, it is a newborn baby! What did she expect – that the baby would take care of itself?

Carol on May 21st, 2008

I certainly don’t think that she thought the baby wouldn’t be dependent on her. As a new first time mother, I think it can be surprising that you feel tugged on all the time by your baby and it’s easy to become overwhelmed. If you know nothing about motherhood, I think you have (at least I did) an idea that your baby will sleep and be content and you’ll be able to get things done. Unfortunately, it doesn’t usually happen that way. Anyway, that’s what I thought she meant by her statement. I remember hearing bad things about her when she and Lloyd got together but I always liked them never believe what I read about celebrities. Magnus is one of the most beautiful babies I’ve ever seen.

Whocares on May 21st, 2008

I love that she’s proud of not having a nanny, she hasn’t worked in years why would she have a nanny.

carla at somethingaboutbaby.com on May 21st, 2008

Magnus is a beautiful child. She is very honest in her remarks.

bebe on May 21st, 2008

I think it’s terrible that he left his wife who was pregnant! I think it’s irresponsible to go out and get another woman pregnant and start a family with the new woman. What about his other children? Do they feel abandoned because their father chose to be a family with his other son and other wife instead? I think it’s pitiful of Kristy Swanson. If history repeats he’ll leave her for someone else very soon….

Alisa on May 22nd, 2008

Is Lloyd involved in his other sons lives at all? Every time I read something on these 2 it’s as though this is the first child for both of them.

No matter the timing of when their relationship started, any guy leaving his wife so far along while pregnant is low in my book. I definitely would be leery of having a kid with him.

Lisa on May 22nd, 2008

Nice interview but it irks me when celebs like to point out they are not using a nanny or any help. Like it’s such a rare thing. I have news for them most of the population doesnt use a nanny, its not like its a major feat.

mmh on May 22nd, 2008

There are so many reasons why breastfeeding honestly doesn’t work out (in my case, my milk never came in) that books never, ever address. I truly believe my post-partum depression was caused by feeling utterly devastated that I couldn’t nurse and I felt like no one had ever told me that was a possibility. I knew it would be tough, I just never knew it would be impossible…

Aliza on May 22nd, 2008

As a former nanny I have no idea why people think it’s such a terrible thing to have. In each of my 5 positions I never felt like I was raising someone else’s child. I was just providing childcare.

Kristy isn’t working much right now and that’s great. But if she did have to work a nanny would be there to watch her child and make sure that her son had the best and most consistent care possible.

Kat on May 25th, 2008

mmh… I know what you mean… that’s what happened with my second son and I just felt like this horrible failure… and it was worse for me knowing I’d nursed his older brother for a full year.

I just sat there, crying, for weeks, praying that the milk would come….

I still praise GOD that I had the sense to see that my baby wasn’t getting anything, that he wasn’t peeing or pooping hardly at all, and did what was necessary after totally giving it my all.

The guilt still comes and goes, moreso that I didn’t nurse my daughter after because I needed the meds to be a good and sane mother to all my kids, so it trumped nursing her, but I have to look at the positives… that I tried my best, that I’m now in a more healthy place mentally than I ever was before all that… and that my children are happy, healthy, and loved.

Candace on December 28th, 2010

I have to say, unless you plan on being able to nurse your newborn about every other hour, and rest in between, except at night, …….. you should not expect you will EVER put your child first.
The very reason children need Moms to bond with them is why our bodies are designed this way.
There is nothing wrong with an unkempt house, and not looking like a Playboy model after childbirth and a rigorous breastfeeding schedule.
You should love and enjoy the little time they will need you, be their influence to see kindness and calm amid the storms of life.
It is the model for life, and you are showing them how to seek peace and tranquility in the loving embrace of the first relationship a child has.
Read: John Bowlby’s, “Attachment Disorders” criterion. This is why there is so much deviant behavior and lack of commitment in relationships today. The first question any good psychologist asks someone is, ” How was your relationship with your Mother when you were growing up?”
They know to ask this, Mothers have a powerful force in a child’s development.
It it a true statement, even Hitler could attest to: “The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the World.”
Listen to John Mayer’s song, “Daughters”, and you will see many a child is a Mothers train wreck first hand. Think before you have children, they are NOT a by-product of your lust, or proof of your ability to reproduce.
It should be a strong desire to have a child ,to raise to be a loved individual into your loving family.