CBB Exclusive: Iyari Limon on pregnancy, birth, and motherhood
by CBB interviewer Tracy Bobbitt of Crib Rock Couture:
Actress Iyari Limon is a native of Mexico who was raised by her parents in Los Angeles, California. A self-made and steadily working actress, Iyari began her pursuit of acting while in high school at age 16. She has starred in many films and television shows over the years, although her most recognized role to date has been the character Kennedy on the television series Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
In January of 2007, while on vacation at Disney World with boyfriend Alejandro Soltero, Iyari received unexpected news. She was pregnant! Iyari reflects that while it was a tumultuous time for her, the unexpected surprise changed her life both irrevocably and for the better.
On August 24, 2007, when daughter Kimaya Thais Alexandra was born, Iyari officially earned the title “Celebrity Mom.” I had the pleasure of interviewing Iyari in late January; learning about her new life with Alejandro (now her husband), and her gorgeous, look-alike daughter Kimaya. Iyari is a progressive mom with a lot to say. I enjoyed her views on all things baby: from advocacy of breastfeeding and the Bradley Method to the difficulties of choosing baby names.
Click below for the interview and photos.
Before we talk about the baby and your recent marriage, fill me in on your pregnancy. How was pregnancy for you?
I had a really big tummy. I got so big. I gained 25 pounds but it was all in my stomach.
When I would go to bed I would cry during those last months of pregnancy because I couldn’t get up onto the bed. [The baby] would be poking me with her feet and fingers. I couldn’t breathe. We’d have to tell [her] “Honey, please relax. Mommy needs to go to sleep now.” We’d walk around the block to put her to sleep. And then she’d give me some space to lay upright and sleep a little. I’m small (5’3") and my stomach was huge.
I thought I would get big all around, thinking this is great, I can get fat and eat everything I want. But it wasn’t like that. I couldn’t eat what I wanted. I’d have say, a salad, pork and vegetables and rice, even if I ate the pork first — somehow the baby would find a way to spit out the pork. She’d go through all the food and just spit out the pork.
When we went in for the 12 week ultrasound, the baby was waving her hands up. I thought we were going to see something just a little bigger than the 5 week ultrasound but no, she was so formed. She jumped up and waved her hand. I was in shock. I thought, “That is in my stomach?” We knew she was a fighter, that she was strong.
At the onset of your pregnancy, you and Alejandro were still working out aspects of your relationship. How did that affect you and your pregnancy?
I was sick a lot and emotionally I was a wreck — up and down. But Alejandro was so amazing. He was by my side every second. I would tell him, “You can go back to Mexico, I don’t need you. I can do this alone,” and then suddenly I would be crying in his arms. You can imagine. He said, “No, I’m not leaving you, no. We’re in this together and whatever happens. I’m here to be with you. Yes, I want to have this baby, but you are who I want to be with.” He was so great. Every second he was by my side.
Being pregnant — I look back and I go “Wow.” But during it I thought, “This is really awful — I feel awful physically [and] emotionally. It’s really hard being pregnant.” But looking back, I loved it. I loved having a belly. I had the perfect pregnancy because all that comes along with it, like the nausea and the emotional roller coaster, it’s all part of it.
I look back and she was born on her due date, she was perfectly positioned, every check-up was perfect. It was perfect. I don’t know what she did in there, but she adjusted my intestines. I think my body is even better now as far as my body’s functioning, digesting — everything is better now.
That’s not the story you typically hear.
Yeah, my body was ready to have a baby I think. My stomach stretched out so much [while I was pregnant] you just gain so much more respect for the human body and what it’s capable of doing.
Times are changing also, people are more aware of what they’re putting in their bodies, they’re living longer and they’re more likely to have children at a later age than they were years ago.
Did you find out the baby’s sex before she was born?
Yes. We thought we were having a boy. [The baby] moved a lot and was feisty, jumpy and strong. Then we went to find out the sex. I was so sure [the baby] was a boy. I thought, we’ll go and he’ll open his legs wide open and we’ll know.
Well, sure enough, she opened her legs wide open and tossing and turning. They asked, “Are you ready?” We said yes. [The technician announced], “It’s a baby girl!” I was in shock. I said, “Are you sure?” and the technician told us, “I’ve never been wrong.” I was so ecstatic because I had always wanted a girl.
Did you pick out a name right away?
Oh my goodness. I went online for about 5 hours a day from the moment I found out I was pregnant until I gave birth, looking for names.
We left the hospital [after the baby was born] with no name.
[Laughing] No! You didn’t.
The week after [her birth] we went back to the hospital, chose a name, got back home and then 3 days later changed it again. [Laughs]
So what did you originally name her?
Nixie Thais. Nixie is a water sprite, like a fairy. It was cute, but she just wasn’t Nixie.
Alejandro, I know this is funny, really wanted the name Kennedy [Iyari’s characters name from the Buffy series]. And I love the name Kennedy because it’s strong and feminine, but I felt really funny naming her after a character I had played. I didn’t want to. I kept saying no.
There was a name we liked through the pregnancy, Marseille, like the South of France. Because it sounds good in Spanish, it sounds good in French and it sounds good in English. We needed a name that could do that; sound good across the board. But then she was born and she wasn’t a Marseille. She was so girly like a little fairy, like a little flower. She was still strong but so girly. So we named her Nixie Thais.
Then I said [to Alejandro], “I know you picked Nixie, but I just don’t see her as Nixie,” and he said, “You know, you’re right.”
So then, I chose Kimaya. I love the K.
What’s her full name?
Kimaya Thais Alexandra Soltero-Limon. I wanted to give her my last name and he wanted to give her his last name, so we did both. It’s hyphenated, Soltero-Limon. So here I am always criticizing Latinos for naming their kids a million and one names and then I go and do the same thing, you know? [Laughs] We call her “Kimmi Thai” for short.
What were some other name choices on your short list?
We had so many names. Takaely which is “little princess” in Hawaiian. We got really close to [choosing] Takaely. I wanted to name her Azalea as well, but my husband had a housekeeper named Azalea and he didn’t want to think of her. There was a reason for every name we chose not working and that we couldn’t name her that.
Trust me, I understand. We went through the same thing.
It was so much harder than you would think to name your child. We had many more boys names picked out than girls. I had quite a while to pick out her name. There were so many. Japanese names, Indian names, every ethnicity, every language.
And Kimaya means?
Divine, in Sanskrit which is the root [language]. You can’t get any more original than Sanskrit. Thais is Greek and means union, and together, “Divine Union.” And that’s us. We’re so united. If Alejandro could have carried Kimaya he would have. He was as pregnant as I was. Obviously I couldn’t drink during the pregnancy, but he didn’t have a drop of alcohol either because he said he was also pregn
ant. I’d tell him to have a glass of wine and enjoy it for me, but he’d say no.
Did he have sympathy pregnancy weight too?
Oh yeah. The first three months he would get dizzy, lay down and had to watch what he ate.
When did the two of you decide, “Okay this is it, we’re doing it, we’re getting married?”
When I was eight months pregnant, [Laughs] because I thought, “He’s for real.” He’s great. [Originally] I thought maybe I didn’t pick the best partner or the best boyfriend, but wow, did I ever pick the perfect father for my child. I knew no matter what happened he was going to be the best possible father. Then he pulled through as a partner [too] and totally exceeded all my expectations and went beyond what I had imagined. And he’s been like that ever since. He was completely ready.
When and where did you get married?
In Norwalk [California] in a civil ceremony, July 2, 2007. We went and got our marriage license on a Friday and made an appointment for the following Monday. I was never the type to get married because I was pregnant or to be with someone because of that.
I took my mom and my friend Albert, who has always been so great. I wore a beautiful cream-colored dress with my big tummy. We took pictures. In the middle of our vows it was all emotional. My mom was video-taping and she says “Wait, wait — hold on! I don’t know how to turn [the camera] on!” She interrupted the whole thing. It was hilarious. She’s screaming with her little accent. We stopped the whole thing. We got a little of it on video.
In the future we plan and would like to have more of a spiritual wedding in France. Something small but pretty.
After Kimaya was born were you at all surprised at how good Alejandro was with her?
No, I knew he would be [a good father] while I was pregnant. He’s been talking to her since about four minutes after she made it into my stomach. He has her up in the air all the time [now]. In the middle of the night when I would get up to feed her, I’d be like “Here, burp her.” And he’d get up as often as I would and put her to sleep as often as I would.
Even diapers?
Oh yeah! He changed her first diaper. The only thing he hasn’t done is breastfeed her and that’s because he can’t. But I know he would if he could! [Laughs]
How was the birth process for you? We’re you able to follow through with the Bradley Method?
It was almost all natural. We had been going to the Bradley natural childbirth classes and wanted everything natural. I think I went into first-stage labor the day before and didn’t realize it, because suddenly I was in active labor. It was very painful. I never had the first stage where I was like, “I’m in labor this is great!” It was straight to “Oh my God this is so painful,” with a contraction every minute to three minutes, so erratic; it wasn’t how we thought it was going to be.
I kept saying this isn’t the “411,” [the term for] a contraction every 4 minutes lasting 60 seconds each. When we got to the hospital I wasn’t dilating for some reason. I had no pain medication. They kept offering me the epidural but I thought, “No, I can do this, I can do this.”
Then I took my birth ball, went in the shower, and even took a walk — nothing. I just wasn’t dilating. So 14 hours later, my doctor broke the membrane, all this water gushed out. And it’s painful to have contractions without any water in there. The baby never dropped and she was really high up. She was in position though.
After 14 hours with no pain medication I was 2.5 centimeters going nowhere — I thought I was going to die. I couldn’t do it anymore. I was throwing up and shaking. I thought there is no way I can go 24 hours at this rate. So, I got the epidural which was so sad for me because I tried so hard not to. I had prepared everything for a natural childbirth.
But then I began having difficulty breathing and could feel pain shooting down the nerve of one leg. At that point we told the doctor, “Just do a c-section. Do whatever you have to do,” because my body was about to shut down.
I didn’t know what was happening, but I knew something was wrong. The doctor said “No, we’re going to have this baby vaginally and I’m going to tell you when to push.” I thought “Thank God!” All I wanted was for someone to tell me when to push! Within 3 pushes, I was at 9.5 centimeters. I don’t know how!
Originally I wanted to have the baby at home. A water birth maybe. I wanted a mid-wife. Then things changed. Because it was our first, we just wanted everything to be safe. I wanted a doula (A birth doula is a continuous care provider for labor) but the doula [we chose] wasn’t available during that time.
My [obstetrician] was so informed about the Bradley Method that the doula told us that we wouldn’t need her if we had him as our doctor. We’d never had a baby, so at that moment everything goes out the door that you’ve learned. You’re just trying to remember the breathing and the relaxing and the water and the squats. At that point she was fine.
I cried. I didn’t feel her [being born] and I’d gone through so much pain, having no pain medication. And then in the end not to feel her come out because of the drugs [I was given] at the last minute. I didn’t get to see her [being born] either. Alejandro saw her and he helped deliver her. I wanted that shared experience of seeing her and feeling her, but I didn’t [get it] and that made me really sad.
In the end she was born vaginally. Everything was perfect and they gave her to me right away. [Kimaya] was born 7 pounds and completely healthy. [She was] 19 inches and 9.9 on the apgar scale. Within a few minutes she was breastfeeding. It was great. Because of our birth plan they knew they couldn’t give her a pacifier and that they had to give her to me right away. They knew they couldn’t separate me from her. I was never away from her.
Which hospital did you choose to have Kimaya in?
That’s another thing you learn. We originally chose Cedars Sinai, but went to Good Samaritan because of the doctor [we chose]. [Previously] we had a great doctor, just great but …. I didn’t want an episiotomy or an epidural and he [performs] 90% epidurals and I don’t know what percentage of episiotomies.
The next doctor [we chose], Dr. Dwight, was more into the natural birth, so we went that way. But you never know, you make a choice with each baby. In the end she was born vaginally. She was born completely healthy.
And you were so well-prepared, I mean Iyari you had a birth plan! I’m listening to you thinking, “Birth plan? What the hell’s a birth plan? My only plan was ‘Get this baby out of my body. Now!’’
[We laugh] I didn’t know anything. I had never been at a birth. I didn’t know what an episiotomy was; I just had to learn all this while I was pregnant. I would go online or I would go to classes. I had to educate myself.
I read
You were researching it all on your own. Where did you receive your best information?I really recommend the Bradley classes; [they] were really great. We learned so much there, from breastfeeding to how to get the dad involved in the birth process. The Bradley Method is all about you and your husband delivering your baby and having the least medical intervention possible. One thing leads to another and [the doctors] take control completely and we didn’t want that.
Another great, great group was La Leche League. We went to a few meetings while I was pregnant and you learn something at every meeting. It’s a difficult thing, breastfeeding. Not only do you have to learn, but the baby has to learn and there are struggles, you know?
There are so many issues that can arise with breastfeeding and many women just give up because they don’t know what to do or they’re not educated or informed [about breastfeeding techniques]. So the La Leche League, you can call them 24 hours a day. They’ll even come to your house to help you. They are great.
What was the epiphany you had with breastfeeding, when you realized, "This is important to me and this is the path I’m taking?”
I always knew I wanted to breastfeed [my daughter] because my mother had breastfed me my first year and I’ve always been super healthy. The more I educated myself, I realized this was how the baby got all its antibodies [from breast milk] and that there is nothing else out there that comes close to it. It just doesn’t make sense not to breastfeed if you can.
Many people think, “Oh my milk dried up,” or “It hurts too much.’ Yeah, it hurts like hell! For about a week I would cringe and curl up my toes and cry when I knew she was hungry thinking, “Oh my god, I have to breastfeed.” It was so painful, but it does go away. I didn’t know it would. But it does. You just have to be persistent, decide that’s what you’re going to do and stick with it.
Now Kimaya doesn’t want anything but the breast. She won’t take a bottle which can sometimes be hard. I wish my husband could help me feed her in the middle of the night. We’ve tried every bottle out there. Even the [brand] shaped more like a breast and the texture is [more like a breast], but no, she doesn’t want it. She realizes it’s not me and she’ll bite it and spit it out.
It’s tricky. If you introduce a bottle too soon, then it’s easier for them to drink from a bottle and they don’t want the breast. But if you introduce the bottle too late they just want the breast. That’s why it’s good to go to these meetings that the La Leche holds each week.
Do you have a problem breastfeeding in public or are you more of the mind, “I need to do it wherever I need to do it and that’s how it is?”
At first it was hard for me. [Kimaya] doesn’t like to be covered so that was hard and I couldn’t position her in just any chair. It gets easier, but it was hard. I would set up my whole little breastfeeding station at home with pillows. I’d do the football hold because another position wasn’t working, and then it was “She hates this side [of the breast]” or then “I have too much milk coming from [this other] side’” you know — what do we do?
There were a lot of little issues we had and it was even harder in public. So I didn’t breastfeed in public for the first couple of months. But now it’s great! I don’t mind. I’m discreet about it. I cover myself and I cover her. You can’t really even tell [I’m breastfeeding]. I don’t just pop out my boob anywhere, you know what I mean? I’m not to that extreme.
When people have been aware that I’m breastfeeding they have been very respectful and discreet. I’ve only done it a few times in restaurants and it’s easier to do as they get older. When she was younger I didn’t go anywhere because I knew she would have to eat. So yeah, I’m a big advocate of breastfeeding.
Any other books that you read while you were pregnant that really helped you?
I liked one that a friend gave me that I think was called Attachment Parenting. It was by Dr. Sears. William Sears I believe — any book by him is good. And the “Bradley Method” book as well. That educated me about the body, what’s going on, how the baby is being formed, how contractions work and the uterus. That was great!
Are you doing any classes together yet? Like mommy and me yoga or any of that kind of thing?
Not yet. She’s still too young still, but it would be great and I would like to do all that. I went to one pregnancy yoga class.
Does your daughter co-sleep with you now? Or do have her in a crib or bassinet in your room?
We had her crib set up and everything, but she’s never once slept in it. We got the co-sleeper and that’s been great! She’s right next to me, I can grab her, breastfeed her and put her back in the co sleeper. She turned 5 months yesterday and she still sleeps in the co-sleeper. When I breastfeed her it convenient because I’m [reclined] and she falls asleep. Then I don’t want to wake her because she tends to wake easily now. So I leave her there with us.
That’s so sweet. My daughter’s eight and I still love when she sleeps next to me. Nothing better than watching your peacefully sleeping kid. They’re the best.
They are. The other day my husband was on the couch. I woke up and put the baby in the co-sleeper and said, “Come to bed.” Because when the baby and I fall asleep we take up most of the bed and he ends up going to the couch because he doesn’t fit [on there with us]. We’ll fall asleep sideways surrounded by pillows and suddenly were taking up the whole bed. He’ll say, “There’s just not enough space for me.” He’s very sweet.
Tell me about the baby’s personality.
Kimaya’s personality? Super feisty. I don’t want to say “feisty” but, she is really feisty and really sweet [too]. One of my friends calls her “little Jalapeño” because she fires up. She yells and she’s very dramatic. Kimaya’s our little drama queen and only 5 months old. It’s hilarious.
She smiles at everybody and all the time. If you smile at her, she smiles back. She’s super social. She touches everything. She is starting to be aware of animals and wants to touch them. She loves kids, absolutely loves kids and she likes
to observe children playing. She’s a really happy baby.She’s also very strong, muscular and very toned. She could be a gymnast. She stands up on her Dad’s hands and balances there. She’s like a little angel. She has something special.
She has undoubtedly has that special spark and she’s gorgeous! Is she an active baby or more on the mellow side?
When she’s hungry and tired I have to walk around the house. She gets bored so easily. We walk her around the block and she loves to pick flowers. We’ve been so active with her, not only through the pregnancy but since she was born and she’s used to that. She loves going out, loves going where there are a lot of people, she loves going where it’s really noisy.
My friend had a “P” party, where you had to go as something beginning with the letter P. She was the only baby there. I had a baby chick outfit I put her in, and in Spanish [chick] is pollito. So we took her as a little pollito. People were laughing and there was loud music. She slept through the whole party.
So were you the first in your group of friends to have a baby?
No, no, I have a girlfriend with twins who are now 20 months old, actress Mina Olivera. She’s my closest friend with babies and the person who threw my baby shower. [Mina’s] great, and a great inspiration and role model. I love her family and her husband. She has a little boy and a little girl. She’s Brazilian — beautiful inside and out. I totally look up to them as a family. I look at them and say, “Wow! That’s how I want to be.” [The Oliveras] go to Brazil every New Years Eve and we were thinking we would do that next year as well.
Speaking of your baby shower, were there any gifts you received or purchased that you loved? Or that you wish you had?
The co-sleeper I love. I love your line [Crib Rock] of onesies I received from the producer of my last film. The London Bridge thermal is wickedly cute and the material is so yummy. I love our green Stokke Tripp Trapp high chair.
I’m not happy with any car seats. I have one of course. It’s so cute. I did all this research on car seats to find the best one. This one comes from Italy but it’s just not comfortable for her.
But you know what else I love? I tried to do the whole baby wearing thing and I started to get together with a group called Koala LA, a group of moms that get together once a week and they have a library of baby carriers; everything from the Baby Hawk to the Baby Pouch. They lend them to you for a month so you can try them out. They even teach you how to use them. It was [helpful] because I couldn’t find the right baby carrier because she doesn’t like slings and doesn’t like to be covered. I went to the Baby Expo and bought like three of them and she hated them all. The only one she’s liked so far in the Baby Pouch.
What is it about the Baby Pouch that makes Kimaya feel so comfortable?
It’s really stretchy so it’s not tight on her. I can pop her head out; I can pop her legs out. She’s not restricted or too tied in. She likes her legs dangling. As an infant it was hard to carry her because she didn’t like to be smushed or bent. It was hard for a while.
What about booties or socks? Will she keep them on her feet?You know those little booties, Trumpette? I love those socks. I went out and bought every color. She doesn’t really like things on her feet like shoes, but those are comfy. You know what I’m looking for though? Tiny baby tights, not like panty hose, the thick kind, like stockings. I can’t find those.
Trumpette makes those now too, with the same cute designs all over the feet and up the legs.
Really? I haven’t seen them yet!
How do you typically like to dress Kimaya? All cotton? Are you more of a casual mom? Kitson Mom? Little European dresses mom?
I like all cotton and I like her to look girly. I put a jean skirt on her the other day with striped stockings. Oh — she was so cute! She’s still a little young for a jean skirt. She barely pulled that off. You want them to look like babies. You have their whole lives to dress them up in cool stuff. Sometimes it’s hard to find cool stuff where they still look like a baby.
I got one shirt for her by Ooh La La Mama … cute shirt. I’m not into skulls at all, but it has a skull on the front and lots of flowers. It’s cute. Stuff like that.
I like layers too. She has a long sleeve onesie that has blue and green and pink, and I put a tee over that that says “I love Mommy,” with sweat pants and stockings underneath, paired it with her little Trumpette socks.
I also bought these little hairclips from the Baby Expo for about $10 each or something?
Are they the “NoSlippy Hair Clippys”?
Yes! I spent hours while I was pregnant looking at her wardrobe and matching outfits to clips. The clips were too big on her head when she was born so I’m just putting them on her now and they look really cute. She doesn’t like it when I pull her hair back, but she has to get used to it. She has all that hair!
I told you I had a dream my baby was walking right? Because she has so much hair people always think she’s older. She was month or two months and even my husband’s mom would send her 9-12 months clothes and got upset because the baby was never wearing any of the outfits in pictures. I said, “You know the baby’s only eight weeks.” And she would say that she looked “big” in pictures. But that’s just her. She photographs older than she is. It’s all her hair.
What’s your stroller of choice?
Our car seats came with a stroller, but we’re not happy with it because it doesn’t have any compartments. They’re cute, but I don’t know that they’re that practical. It’s more for shopping or the grocery store — you don’t want to go to Disneyland with it because you can’t put anything in it you know?
So you’ve already taken her to Disneyland?
Yes! [Laughs] She was around 4 months. I took her on [one] ride, some kind of safari on a boat. I have pictures. She loved it.
I bet. That’s why they call it “The happiest place on earth.” So being a new mom and fitting in your career as an actress, how does it work?
It doesn’t really work. [Laughs]
You’re funny.
Yeah, I think it’s a choice you have to make. Because I breastfeed and I’m committed to being with her one hundred percent of the time — which I wouldn’t change for anything — my ca
reer has got to take a little…Hiatus?
Yeah. And I don’t mind. I always wanted to have kids and I was ready to have kids. I never wanted to have [children] too early and then [feel] resentment towards my kids about something I didn’t get to do or accomplish in my life. I’m so happy and content with my baby because I’ve lived.
You’re perspective changes when you have a baby. Like right now, we’re [conflicted] should we stay here? Should we go to Mexico? Things would be different if I didn’t have a baby, I’d be like “Who cares? Let’s do it!” But [with a child] everything changes. Your decisions are different. You don’t take risks as you would if you weren’t a mom.
It’s interesting for me, the difference; who I was before having a baby and who I am now and how I make my decisions which are completely different now. I’m really glad I did all that [traveling] before.
I knew once I had kids they were going to be one hundred percent [the priority]. And I feel great; like I did everything I wanted to do in my career. Of course I’d love to do more, but I’m content with what I’ve done and I have this little jewel in my life.
If I never did any [acting] again just to be with [Kimaya], that would be fine with me. As long as she needs me, she’s my priority. If I need to feed her and she wants to eat and will only take the breast then I guess I’m not going to work.
So I guess that answers my question, “Are you doing the nanny thing?”
[Laughs] No.
So how long, in your mind, would you foresee staying home as a full time mom? Or have you not thought that far in advance?If I got a job, a good job, I would probably try to pump and have someone come with me and feed her, but if I don’t get a job, I’m fine. I’m open to possibility, but my baby comes first. I want to breastfeed for at least a year. That’s my goal. She’s eager to try food and I’ve already given her a little bit of banana. She just wants it. I think she’ll start eating in about another month.
And you said the other day she was trying to pull up already?
Yeah, yeah. She’ll pull up, sit up and of course she’ll fall over because she’s so little. She hates to lie down in her car seat she doesn’t even like being a little bit slanted. She wants to sit up. It’s amazing how one day they wake up and they want to touch everything, observe everything. She’s completely gotten to this new stage.
So who is the pushover parent in the household?
I don’t know. I’m more of a disciplinarian and he’s more of a spoiler,. I have more of the aggressive personality and he has more of the passive. He’s more patient and I’m more, “Boom, boom, bam! This is how it is. This is how it’s going to be.”
But you know, I don’t know. We’re coming across little things [in which] he’s stricter. I’ll say, “But she’s crying.” And he’ll say, “Put her down she needs to cry — she can’t get used to being held all the time.” But I’m here to hold her!
So I don’t know if it’s that she’s a baby and I believe she’s deserves anything she wants. But I think [my husband and Kimaya] are going to have such a tight relationship it will be like, “[Whisper, whisper] don’t tell Mom.” You know what I mean?
Any plans to add to the family in the near future?You know, we have been talking about it. I think we’re leaning more towards, yes. Soon. I wanted Kimaya to be able to help choose when she got a new brother or sister, but you don’t want them too far apart. She’s so drawn to babies and to little kids that I don’t think she’d have a problem. She’s really independent already. I don’t think [a sibling] will be an issue as far as jealously or all that.
So I think it’s a good idea when she’s maybe a year I’ll get pregnant again. But we’re so happy with her, we’re more than content.
What’s the best parenting advice you received that you would give other new moms?
The best advice I think I’ve gotten is to enjoy every second of your baby because it goes by so fast. People have been telling me that since the day she was born — everywhere — in restaurants, in public, from people I know, my close friends. So, I really took that to heart and I’ve been with my baby every second of her life, as my husband has.
Now she’s five months and I look back to when she was born and I think, “Oh my gosh, look at her, I miss her.” And at the same time I think, "Thank God I’ve been able to be with her every second." That’s the advice I’d give any new mom, is to spend as much time with your baby as you can because they do grow so fast and you never get that back. Every new thing that they do is awesome and if you miss it, you miss it. It’s gone.
Like I was with her the first time that she passed gas. [Giggles] It was hilarious because she got scared and looked up at [us] like “Was that me?” Just hilarious. They’ve got these brand new little bodies and everything is starting to work on its own. She’s getting accustomed to her body how it works and I love being a part of that.
They’re never going to be babies again, newborns again. I’m so, so happy about all the time I’ve spent with Kimaya. That’s been the best part of it. I have pictures galore, hundreds of pictures of her — almost every day of life.
She’s going to grow up, get married; she’s going to make her life and go off and do her thing, but I’ll always have those memories of when she was mine. When I spent every second with her. I couldn’t imagine if I’d gone back to work or [given her] to a nanny. I can’t imagine it. I’m so very thankful that both my husband and I have been able to be with her every day of her life.
Photography: Jennifer Parris of Gabbeli Photography; personal snapshots courtesy Iyari.
Hair/Makeup: Douglas MartucciFiled Under:
I can relate to her on so many things, and I totally agree on the hair. My first child was born with tons of hair and everyone always commented on how much older she looked, then my second was born with no hair and still at 2 barely has what my first was born with LOL everyone always gets so surprised when they find out how old she is, they usually guess she’s quite a bit younger
