My son was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder when he was 2 and a half years old.
I took a week to cry, get p***ed off,cry some more, get more p***ed off and then I decided to deal with it however I could. I grabbed on to any help I could get and took one day at a time.
My son is now 9 and is a happy, social boy, doing incredibly well in mainstream school.I have learned over the years to appreciate each milestone we have achieved and am continually reduced to tears of pride by things he does. He has been learning to play the clarinet and has just started learning guitar. He loves sport, especially football and his current obsession is memorising all the player statistics from every team. His other great passion at the moment is learning to play golf.
Autism and all, I couldn’t imagine my son any other way. When he comes over and hugs me and tells me that he loves me bigger than the whole Solar System, I hold him tight and thank God that he is mine.

Dear Missy, Your spouse and you are doing wonderful things for Owen and Sammy. Those of us who do not live with autism cannot imagine the struggles that those who do endure. You have put beautiful words to it that make it very real to us.

I hope and pray that his appointments and therapy continue to bring progress. I also want to say that you shouldn’t give up hopes and dreams for him. I have found that no matter the circumstance, we shouldn’t limit those around us whom we love by merely accepting the expectations of others, or ourselves. Also, don’t let Owen’s condition cause you to second guess your decision to have another. They are both precious gifts to you, your husband, your family and your friends. Each child comes with built in struggles, but many, many more smiles than tears.

Thank you for sharing. Thank you for so eloquently allowing each of us a glimplse into the world of children with autism. Thanks to you and your husband for being role models in your care, attention and love for your children.

Sonny

You have written a story of hope. I recognize that you are traveling a journey we forged many years ago, as our son with autism is now 20. I am awed by your wealth of knowledge and encouraged that you have utilized therapies that were merely ‘ideas’ when we pioneered our child who was alone in this process.
I recently shared our story that was recently published in The Philadelphia Inquirer.
http://www.philly.com/inquirer/opinion/20080424_A_path_into_the_world.html

Always remember to look back and see how very far you have come.
Best wishes and thank you for sharing your personal trials and tribulations that we as parents of autism endure.
Regards,
Robin H. Morris

Dear Heart: I have known you all your life, and even before you were born. Your seeking mind, your incredible intelligence, and your ability to articulate your thoughts and put them on the page, your sense of fun, and your heart for whatever you put your mind to, all add up to one super-special mother for Owen and his future. While I have always enjoyed our exchanges about the world and its many facets, I have always admired the complexities of your many, many skills. Owen and Samuel are part of us. Their value to your family is equivalent to all the children we hold dear. What you can rest in is the certainty that each of us who love you (and that is all of us) support you in your every decision, pray for all your needs, and hold great hope for the future of your special boy, for it is clear to everyone who knows you, to everyone who has read this site and now know your story, that Owen is blessed to have such loving, caring parents. I tell you this in such a public way so that others can know that to us, Owen is a perfect boy with a very difficult diagnosis, but who has every edge in the parents he has, and who is well loved by every member of your family. Consider how much it means that God has entrusted him to you. It is perhaps a measure of how valuable God thinks you really are. He is not wrong. Even when you are exhausted, when you don’t know what to do next, when you are all out of ideas, know He has provided great resources in your family members. Just remember to ask. By the way, your writing prowess does us all proud. (Your Aunt Barbara)

Missy-
thank you for sharing your story with such honesty. Owen is very fortunate to have you and your husband on his team….
I am a parent of a son with autism as well. I recently founded an online society community for families with children on the spectrum to help parents to connect, support and encourage each other. Please feel free to join and share at http://www.foggyrock.com

Missy,

I have always enjoyed your CBB posts and admired the way you write. However I had no idea that in your life you would be such a strong person and such a loving mother.

My mother’s godson, who is now in his late twenties, is autistic. His parents love him more than anything. They were blessed with two more children, who are now both in university and completely healthy.

From what I have seen from them, they love their big brother endlessly and they have sincere compassion for anyone going through any similar situation.

Please do not think that your little son will have a skewed definition of what normal is. Think that him being blessed with his older brother, he will get to know firsthand what it is to love somebody no matter how he is, just for who he is and what an emotionally mature and compassionate boy he will grow to be, having such an amazing and nurturing older brother. I have seen this happening before my eyes, in the family mentioned above, and it is something to be admired.

I wish you and your family all the best.

Missy,

I admire your ability to focus your life on such a heartbreaking situation in hopes that your sacrifice will pay off for Owen and for other parents, friends, and family who love someone with Autism.

Great article. You and your husband are great parents. I can tell from the way you describe your kids – the giggles in the morning, the running towards the door to greet dad at night. I know it’s impossible, but try to not worry so much. Everything will work out. It sounds like you are doing everything you can and it sounds like Owen too is growing up as best as he can. Also, if it’s possible, try to get 1 or 2 hours out every month to go do something fun for yourself, whether it be a massage or lunch with your girlfriends – everyone needs to decompress once in a while.

Wow…Owen sounds textbook for biomed after all of his antibiotics and illnesses as an infant.

My son was extremely healthy, no ear infections or antibiotics as an infant and has responded fantastically to dietary and some biomed interventions.

We’ve worked hard and committed to his remediation and we now have our family back on track (we also have an older son and younger daughter)
We have alot of hope for our son.

Thank you for sharing a very personal story. And thanks also for the series on Autism! We can use all the awareness we can!

wow…your story bring tears to my eyes…my heart goes out to you…thanks so much for sharing! a friend’s son is autistic and as a sub for special services, I sometimes work with autistic children…even though they all have the “same” diagnosis…they are all so different. there is one little girl who is in the first grade (though a little older than the average first grader)and though she doesn’t write well, she reads great and completes work on her own. you never know what God has in store for you or your family, I just say hold each other tight and don’t give up on your dreams…live for each day…and in the meantime, your dreams may come true
*sometimes the dreams that come true are the dreams you never even knew you had*
God Bless!