CBB Exclusive update: Inside Trista Sutter's baby shower

07/17/2007 at 02:20 PM ET

CBB Exclusive update: Trista Sutter has read your comments on her baby shower post, and would like to address the c-section quotation that has caused a debate among CBB readers, stressing that she did not say she will be having a cesarean — simply that her doctor has prepared her for it being a possibility due to the factors Trista outlines below.

In fact, she told Conceive magazine,

I’d like to try a very natural childbirth using visualization and meditation to deal with the pain. But if I’m at the point where I can’t take it, I won’t have a problem asking for an epidural.

Trista tells us,

Thanks, Sarah, for giving me this opportunity to shed some light on the quote that seems to be causing much debate for many of you out there.  I’m always sad to see judgments placed on people based on a sentence or two published in a magazine or shown as a bleep on a television program, but realize that the magazines don’t always have the space to go into more detail and that this is a hot topic that has been the cause of debate for many years. 

As a student of physical therapy, I actually interned in a field known as "women’s health", focusing on the treatment of women with obstetrical, gynecological, and urinary problems that often resulted from unnecessary c-sections, so please know that I don’t take this possibility of my own delivery lightly. 

In addition, I would like to say that my doctor is wonderful and would NEVER automatically jump to a c-section unless it was absolutely necessary for my health, or that of my baby.

When asked about a birthing plan and my delivery in my interview with US Weekly, I explained that although I know some women like to try to plan out all of the details, I find that having no expectations besides completely trusting in my doctor is the best route FOR ME. 

I would love nothing more than to give birth naturally, without even the need for medication, but also live in the real world and know that my extremely low pain tolerance may require an epidural.  I also know, based on conversations with my doctor, that the possibility that I will need to undergo a c-section is higher than normal.  This is due to the fact that I am of relatively small size, Ryan was 9 1/2 lbs when he was born (leading us to believe that due to genetics, I may be having a big baby), the baby has measured big, and I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. 

Due to all of those factors, especially my recent diagnosis, my doctor was merely preparing me for the possibility that I may have to have surgery to deliver the baby because, as she explained, if the shoulders get stuck in the birth canal, the baby could be in serious jeopardy.   

Bottom line, my hope is that my baby will come into this world in the least stressful situation and that the delivery will go well and I will be doing whatever my doctor medically recommends to me to make sure that that happens. 

Thank you for your comments and thanks again to CBB for allowing me to clarify what was printed.

Click below for the original post.

Originally posted June 28th: Friends and family, including mother-in-law Barb Sutter, threw reality star and expectant mom Trista Sutter a baby shower on June 16 in Beaver Creek, CO, where she and husband Ryan reside. Trista received lots of baby clothes, including outfits from A Pea in the Pod,and supplies for her first child due, she says, on August 23, and sheis all ready for the arrival (she and Ryan are not finding out the sex).

Everythingis picked out [for the nursery] and ready to be shipped. I’m a hugeplanner…but even more so I’m a fan of surprises, so my love ofsurprises outweighed it.

One thing Trista hasn’t done, though, is much clothes shopping.

Because we don’t know the sex it’s not like I’m seeing cute little girls and boy clothes and feeling like I have to have it.

As she’s previously revealed,her favorite part of being pregnant is feeling the baby kick andTrista, who’s also experiencing Braxton Hicks contractions, is gettinga lot of those these days.

Thebaby is kicking right now, and I absolutely love it! I’m a worry-wartby nature and when it kicks, especially in the morning and before I goto bed, I think ‘Good, you’re in there and you’re ok.’

One of the main reasons she doesn’t mind? She’s happy to be expecting at all.

It took us a long time to get pregnant so it makes it that much sweeter. It’s my dream to be a mom.

As for coming up with a specific birthing plan and choosing herpreferences for her delivery, Trista says she’s not concerned, becauseshe thinks she may have to have a surgical birth anyway.

My doctor said if the baby is big because I’m so small, she’ll have to give me a c-section.

Source: Us Weekly, July 9 issue, pg 24-25

5181cuTrista wears an embroidered dress by Lily Pulitzer ($295).

Christalcollectibles_1956_23696822Here, Trista opens an EIEIO Cow Clothing set by Mud-Pie Baby ($25; available in horse set  also). The brightly colored tank tops are from Hot Moms Club ($24). Additionally, the baby rain boots she’s shown holding in a previous photo are from Gap, but are no longer available.

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brass on

Who are these two?? Is she an actress?

Sarah’s note: They met on the reality show The Bachelorette and have since been married for years and are now expecting.

brass on

Who are these two?? Is she an actress?

ix on

Anyone else think she looks like Kerry Katona in the first pic???

Doreen on

Trista appeared 1st on The Batchelor years ago and then she was on The Batchelorette, (where she met Ryan Sutter)!! πŸ™‚ They married in 2003. I’m sooo happy for them!!

Missy on

It’s disheartening to hear that she is planning a surgical birth if the baby is big and because she is so small. Her body is going to give her what she can handle. I’ve heard so many times doctors say “oh, the baby is going to be so big and he ends up weighing 7 or 8 lbs (average weight!)”. I think women love to hear that their baby is going to be so big and they don’t realize that having a c-section is no fun. It’s harder to breastfeed (however can definetely be done),you are not back on your feet as quickly, and you’re body takes longer to recuperate. Look at how awesome Keri Russell looked just 1 week after giving birth. I am so sure she had a natural birth.

Sarah’s note: Keri had said she was planning on a midwife-assisted hospital birth, so most likely!

Andrea on

What design is on the tank tops in the first picture?

lele on

breastfeeding was easy with my c section … not true at all that it is harder. the tough part is the first day you walk but how does that effect breastfeeding? my section was a pleasant great experience and i was walking around just like miss russell three weeks later! the anti section stuff is so strange to me. i’ll trust my doc.

Natasha on

I would not trust any doctor who told me that I needed to have major abdominal surgery because I looked small and the baby “appeared” to be big. Obviously there are times when a c-section is needed…but honestly…how did our species ever survive to this point without the almighty OB performing c-sections at the whim of a hat???

Missy on

I didn’t mean to sound anti-section (having a c-section myself), however I would have preferred to have a natural birth. My milk took an extra few days to come down, and my body was in pain/discomfort for the first week after giving birth. That’s why I say that it is harder to BF, but definetely do-able (I BF for exclusively for 13 months!). I was also back to normal a few weeks later. Lele, I am glad that you had a positive c-section experience ,however I just feel that doctors push c-sections too often nowadays. To anyone else that I may have offended by my post, I apologize, no harm intended.

Tiff on

*It’s disheartening to hear that she is planning a surgical birth if the baby is big and because she is so small. Her body is going to give her what she can handle.*

She did not say she was planning on having a surgical birth, just that she expected she might. As far as your body giving you what you can handle, not always true. My son was 9 lbs 7.5 oz and I was 5’1″ 95lbs prior to getting preggers. I spent nearly 40 hours in labor with a baby that couldn’t fit through my hips with his head. I breastfed with no problems and looked awesome within a few weeks. I went back to school (college) within 2 weeks and waiting tables at 6 weeks. Circumstances occur.

Tara on

I too find it disappointing when a woman says she is going to have a c-section because the baby MAY be big. Maybe if she has gestational diabetes, but I don’t understand woman that don’t want to feel even a little bit of labor or what is going on with their body. My friends with C-sections had such horrible recoveries. I know that is not the case with all women, but it is still surgery. I too am small, 5’2″ and 100lbs. I pushed for less than 15 minutes. Yes, I was lucky and yes, I am bragging a bit. My baby was 7lbs.

KF on

Does anyone know where Trista’s yellow dress is from? I think it’s really cute, and it looks great on her!

Principesa on

Amen, Natasha! (crowd goes wild!)

dragonfly on

I’m 5′ 5″ and weighed 110lbs before I got pregnant with my 4th baby. She was born at home and weighed 10lbs 4oz. Large baby does not always equal the need for a c-section.

Erin's Mom on

I’m only 5’1 and about 100lbs (not pregnant, of course) and I delivered a nearly 9 pound baby just fine. Well, nearly four hours of pushing, but everyone made it through! I’d be nervous of a doctor would be that quick to order a C-section.

kelli on

I am a nurse, and yes Dr’s sometime do jump to c-sections too soon. But I’m sure the doctor is just preparing her for the possibility of having a section.
Maybe her baby is larger than normal right now, and yes she is small- but it is much better to be prepared for the possibility of having a c-section than having the baby stuck under the pubic bone because the shoulders are too large to be born.

Your body doesn’t always give you what you can handle, and thank God we are able to perform c-sections because before the women would die in childbirth. 1 out of every 4 women would die.

tink1217 on

i had a cscection with my first. I am 5’2″, narrow hips and my daughter was 8lbs 5oz. After 22 hrs of extremely painful labor she was stuck. My doc told me a few weeks prior that he thought I might need a csection due to my size. He was right. Its NOT always true that your body just does what it is supposed to do. I don’t care what anybody says….a csection does not mean you failed or that you are too posh to push or that you are any less of a mother. I know 2 women who SHOULD have had csections and ended up with emergencies and babies in the NICU because of it. A healthy mother and baby is the most imoprtant thing.

angela on

Who knows if she is “too small” or not (I’m not a dr., so I have no clue about the medical aspects of her pregnancy), but I can tell you that I am a pretty “small” person, and I handled my “big” baby boy just fine naturally.

This was even after I was totally freaked out by my mom who told me about a million times that she had difficulty with MY delivery because she was “small”; when I mentioned my concerns to my dr., she pretty much just smiled and said, “you’ll be fine!” πŸ™‚

tink1217 on

missy, I had 2 csections and “bounced back” within a week to 2 weeks jjust like any other woman. Lots of my friends had vaginal births and it took the same amount of time for them.

Amen, Tiff!!!

Jean on

1 of every 4 women would NOT die in childbirth. I understand the section rate is that high right now, but the *medically necessary section rate is NOT that high. And a surgical birth is not “no big deal” to mom OR baby. Just issues nursing is the beginning of it. Possible infections, baby having oral issues from deep suctioning, breathing problems and prematurity issues from scheduled sections (no natural labor hormones to prepare baby), intestinal flora not properly colonized from not coming through the birth canal causing digestive issues later in life, longer recovery times, greater instances of PPD…. the list goes ON. C-sections are NOT “no big deal” – they go “well” for some with no lasting issues but should be a last-resort option, not something that’s quick to jump to. I know plenty of small women who had no trouble birthing bigger babies (especially those with no pain meds able to move around to help baby down and out). I know larger women who needed sections with tiny babies. You never know until you try.

Kerryann on

I’m 5’3” and 100lbs. My first daughter was sunny side up and 7lbs1oz. Because she wasn’t positioned right, I never got past 5cms and had an unplanned c-section. It wasn’t bad and I recovered quickly and well. My second daughter was 3 weeks early and positioned just right, and I had a successful VBAC. I had no problems with my c-section, but I have to say giving birth naturally was so much easier. I could get up immediately after and do everything on my own. My stomach was flat in a week rather than 8 weeks. It was amazing how much easier everything was. And if I had a third, I don’t have a preference for the type of delivery. However, I think women and doctors are too quick to try and predict things. Let your body do what it wants to; and then if you need help, be grateful doctors are there to do c-sections. Don’t be so quick to do a c-section. Every birth is different.

tink1217 on

so jean, after having a section with my 8lb 5 oz daughter who got stuck for hours I should have “tried” to have my 10 pound son naturally??? NO WAY!!! I WILL NOT put my baby in jeopardy for a natural birth. Yes, all of those things you mentioned are possible, but BOTH my kids and millions of other babies are perfectly fine after csections. And, my 2nd was planned, a week before my due date. My recovery time was about 10 days total, and I was out shopping at 5 days post partum. I had no PPD at all…in fact…I felt great!

Lets just say..NOT every womans body is the same. NOT every small woman can have a large baby and NOT every woman in general can get through labor and delivery naturally. Some need help and it is NOT always for selfish reasons or scheduling reasons (for patient or doc). CSections happen and I am VERY glad they can be done. I would much rather have a healthy and safe delivery WHICHEVER way my baby comes into the world.

Natasha on

I don’t think anyone is disputing that c-sections are sometimes necessary. The problem alot of us have is that many OB’s book c-sections based on assumptions that a child will be too big to deliver naturally. I can tell you from personal experience, my daughter was estimated to be big and was born only 6lbs10oz. With my son I consistantly measured 3 weeks bigger than I should have and he was only 6lbs2oz. I think it is reasonable to expect a doctor to wait and see in these types of situations instead of needlessly telling a woman that she will have difficulties when it is very possible that all will be well.

Leyna on

Ladies–just because YOU had a vaginal birth with a big baby doesn’t mean EVERYONE can do so safely. And, YES, women used to die much more frequently in childbirth than they do today, even if 1 in 4 is not the correct statistic. Conversely, doctors ARE doing more c-sections than are necessary, and the rates are slightly alarming and discouraging, considering women’s bodies are designed to carry and birth children. Everybody is partially correct and there is no such thing as 100% “right”–why all the arguing???

JR on

I find it disheartening that she’s expecting a surgical birth for a reason not recommended by the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. If her doctor paid attention to the ACOG’s recommendations, he or she would know it is not appropriate to advise a c-section for suspected big baby. Late-term ultrasounds are frequently +/- two pounds – they are notoriously inaccurate. And barring a prior severe pelvic injury or a rare disorder or deformity, very few women are unable to vaginally birth their babies.

But I suppose that’s what birth culture is in the U.S. It’s unfortunate that so many women are unaware of the true risks and benefits of birth-related procedures and unaware of their options in birthing.

I hope she has a positive experience regardless of whether it’s a vaginal or surgical birth.

yogadaisy on

Yikes! Trista, question your doctor on that call. She (or he) cannot possibly know that at this point. I would run out of any doctor’s office that told me that.

Please read some empowering books and learn how your body works during birth. Your body CAN birth your baby.

Good luck to you! May you have a heathy rest of your pregnancy and beautiful birth and baby.

tink1217 on

JR, so when my baby girl got stuck, was sunny side up, and I did not dilate past 5cm after 22 hr of labor during which I started running a fever from my water having been broken fir so long I should have continued on?? Or my body must have been deformed in some way?? I have never had a pelvic injury either. These comments are what lead women to question themselves and consider themselves failures if they have a csection.

charsmom on

As a mother of two beautiful, healthy, happy girls that were born via c-section, I am saddened to hear so much “anti c-section” bashing on this webiste. Yes, a vaginal birth is what most of us strive for when we are pregnant, but sometimes our birth plans don’t work out as we hope. I don’t think it is fair that others try to make those of us who have had c-sections feel guilty about our birth stories.

My girls and I are alive and healthy; that is the most important thing to me. I have the same wish for Trista and her baby.

Christine on

Such negativity in this topic tonight, not that I should expect any different. Anytime someone is interviewed whether it be about breastfeeding, midwives, c-sections, natural delivery there is always such negative feedback!!! Here’s an idea: how about we let Trista have the delivery the way she would like to, wish her luck and not judge her or her doctors…. you don’t hear me judging any of you for your choices, do you?? Having said that, congrats to the happy couple,e love Trista’s dress and what do those tank tops say???

terri on

Doctors are most concerned with being sued, so if it looks like the delivery is going to be anything but easy breezy then they’ll section you. Sometimes it’s necessary, sometimes not. Thank goodness that we have the option now. Used to be woman would just die in childbirth.

I think she looks beautiful in that yellow dress. I love yellow.

If you don’t recognize her it may be because she used to be blonde, to whoever asked who she is.

Annoynomus on

I just want to state that I am glad that is at least not going to have an elective C-section. Like she said, if she has one, it will be because the doctor thinks it’s neccesary.
That said, I agree with the posters who have stated that doctors tend to do unnecessary C-sections way too much! I personally have nothing against C-sections, as long as they are neccesary!
Unfourtanetly, I think that many women forget that they have the right to refuse an unnecessary C-section. Let me tell you, if I were pregnant and my doctor recommended an unneccesary C-section, I would give birth at home before letting him or her give me a C-section!

morgan on

Ive had no babies, but im very upset by all the comments in here. Mostly by the way the C-section mommies are being put-down. I would think that if id been pregnant for 40 weeks, in labor for an excessive amount of time, in pain, tired, scared, and excited i would probably agree with the professional on the best way to deliver my baby. If he said “this is how it has to be…its SAFER for you and the baby” i wouldnt think that i would second guess him. I would think that i would want a healthy happy baby.

I do agree that there are far too many “planned births” My cousins was scheduled in months before she was due, because thats what she wanted. I dont believe that was what Trist was saying, and i dont belive that any of us women should every give anyone else a hard time about the way THEY handeled child birth. A good friend of mine just gave birth and decided to not breastfeed for whatever reason. Every woman who saw her gave that baby a bottle had something negative to say to her. It was very sad. Ive always looked forward to joining the “mommy-club” but in here it doesnt always seem as welcoming as it should.

That said, i with Trista a safe birth πŸ™‚

gianna on

Sounds like she is already planning on having a c-section. Looks like she is carrying a boy to me.

Diana on

I don’t understand why so many are up in arms over this. First of all it doesn’t sound like this decision is set in stone. It sounds to me at least that they are going to see how it goes? It just sounds like the doctor is preparing her for the possibility, but it doesn’t sound like a planned C-Section so I don’t get what the problem is.

But even if it was planned, who’s business is it but hers? No I personally would not CHOOSE to have a C-section, that freaks me out more than giving birth, but if my doctor thought that I may have trouble giving birth naturally I would hope that he would prepare me for the possibility.

It blows my mind how many people seem to think that they have a right to comment on such a personal decision like this. If the majority of women gave birth by C-section how does that effect you in any way?

A woman should have the right to choose decisions like this about their body, as well as breastfeeding without everyone putting their two cents in.

KA on

OBs do c-sections 25% of the time.
Midwives do them 8% of the time.

You better believe there’s a lot of unnecessary belly-cutting going on by these OBs.

JR on

First, I want to say that none of this commentary is in any way a put-down of women who choose c-sections or are told erroneously by their doctors that they need one. Women are ill-informed about birth, and it is the doctor’s responsibility to handle the birth appropriately AND provide complete information to women so they can make informed choices.

Tink, I would like to address your comments to me so I can explain what I’m getting at:

“JR, so when my baby girl got stuck, was sunny side up,”

Did you know that most of the time, you can avoid having a posterior baby prior to labor? There are many ways to prevent this positioning earlier in the pregnancy and achieve more optimal positioning. However, posterior positioning alone should not, nearly all of the time, automatically lead to a c-section (although it frequently means a longer and more painful labor, and thus often an epidural is more likely).

“and I did not dilate past 5cm after 22 hr of labor”

That is not a reason for an automatic c-section either, although it may be a reason to consider an epidural if mom is exhausted. If mom has already had an epidural, that may be slowing the body’s progress. Positioning during labor is also critical. If mom is free to walk, labor as she finds most comfortable, etc. she is more likely to have a labor that does not stall. The epidural can stall the labor, and so can being stuck in bed and unable to move (because of the epidural). That’s not always the case, but it’s a risk women should be informed of before deciding to have an epidural so they can make a fully informed decision.

“during which I started running a fever from my water having been broken fir so long”

The first question is whether your water ruptured spontaneously or was ruptured by your doctor (AROM). AROM creates an artificial condition in which the cushion protecting the cervix is removed (the bag of waters acts as a cushion). This often makes the contractions much more painful. It also increases the risk of cord prolapse, which is a very dangerous condition for the baby and requires an emergency c-section. Most women aren’t told this by their doctors, either. Also, introducing foreign objects into the birth canal during labor increases the risk of infection. Even if your membranes ruptured spontaneously, the reason for the fever (if from infection and not from the epidural, which also can happen) was probably the fact that your doctor or the nurses were checking your dilation before and after your membranes ruptured. This greatly increases the risk of producing an infection and for this reason, cervical checks should be minimized or not performed at all (cervical checks are not necessary during labor, but may be of interest to mom and the doctor, particularly if it’s a long labor). You may also have had continuous fetal monitoring, which has been shown to NOT improve outcomes, but does again increase the risk of infection by introducing foreign material into the birth canal and directly to the baby (an electrode is screwed into the baby’s scalp in order to obtain the readings).

“I should have continued on?? Or my body must have been deformed in some way?? I have never had a pelvic injury either.”

No. You were not given the information you needed to make an informed decision about what aspects of care were best for you. You probably were never told that there were many things you could do in the months leading up to delivery to prevent a posterior baby. You were probably never told that an epidural carried risks of stalled labor, more difficult vaginal delivery (because you had up to 30% less space to birth your baby while lying on your back – your tailbone swings out of the way and greatly increases the pelvic outlet when you are squatting, standing up, on all fours, or even side-lying). Or that the epidural carried a risk of a fever, which might indicate infection or might indicate a reaction to the epidural, but would have to be treated as an infection. You were probably never told that SROM would make your labor much more physically difficult or carried a risk of cord prolapse. I could go on and on.

“These comments are what lead women to question themselves and consider themselves failures if they have a csection.”

No one should feel that way. My point is not that a c-section is a failed birth, because it isn’t. My point is that healthcare providers fail their patients by not practicing evidence-based medicine and by not fully informing their patients of the risks and benefits of the medical procedures they are recommending. Women should be empowered to make decisions about their own healthcare, particularly when something as important and potentially physically life-altering as birth is going to happen.

If a woman has all the information and chooses an elective c-section, I see nothing wrong with that. The problem is that doctors don’t give women the information they need to make the decisions that they would feel are best. Women believe, based on erroneous things their doctors have said, that they are or were incapable of vaginal birth, when much of the time it simply isn’t true. That’s what I’m passionate about. I want to see all women have the opportunity and knowledge to make truly informed decisions about their own care and the care their babies receive, and it makes no difference to me what they choose, so long as they were not misled by their healthcare providers. No woman “fails” at birth by having a c-section. But sometimes, much more often than it should be, their healthcare providers (be it doctor or midwife) fail them. And that simply should not be.

lisa on

I really hate seeing the whole natural vs csection debate. Whats important is the safe and healthy arrival of babies. We do not know what her body is like, there may be issues that she doesn’t wish to go into in a public forum. The end result either way is hopefully a healthy baby.


Jamie on

I think the ultimately her doctor is going to do what is best for her and her baby. And thats all Trista and Ryan want is for their baby and Trista to be healthy, my cousin is in Med School right now studying to become an OBGYN and they do not just go in and do surgeries just cause, I also remember Trista mention on Dancing With The Stars that she has two herniated disks in her back, if her back is still like that, that also might be going into her doctors decision to do a C-Section. Ultimately its up to her and her doctor.


Kristina on

As to the assertation by a nurse, no less, that 1:4 women would die without the option of cesarean, I challenge you to back up that statement. You’re making it on your credentials and it is VASTLY over exaggerated. The World Heath Organization, looking at births the world over, has deemed that a cesarean rate over 15% is *too high*. Are Western women just built inferior to the rest of the world, with our prenatal care and vast mounts of clean water, food, and sanitation?

What women are not told in this country is that they CAN give birth. Large babies come out of teeny, tiny women, and ensuring that the baby is lined up in an occiput anterior position before the birth will help prevent cesareans because the baby is ‘too big’ to come out. It’s not always about size, it’s more often about the baby’s position, a head that is facing transverse or posterior or asynclitic. It is about women who lie in bed at the insistence of their nurses, get their epidurals the second they start to feel the urge to vocalize in labor, and lay on their backs, being rolled on their sides now and then like rottiserie chickens. That is not how we are meant to give birth, and that is a valid REASON for why our cesarean rate is abominably and unjustifiably, I would daresay, CRIMINALLY high.

Get this:

A higher cesarean rate does NOT equal better outcomes.

There is no reliable way to measure the weight of a baby before it is born. Ultrasounds can be off by as much as 33% of the baby’s weight. And how will Trista feel if she has a surgical birth, has complications, breastfeeding tanks and the doc pulls out a 7# baby? It happens to women all over the U.S. because of this terrible condition called “Failure To Wait.”

Trista is an example of how women accept whatever we’re told far too often because someone has a credential after their name. She’s willing to accept *major abdominal surgery* without a second opinion?? I hope that she reads these comments and reconsiders her options.

Christine on

just curious, where exactly did that last quote (about the possible c-section) come from?? I have the new US and didn’t see it in there? just wondering

Sarah’s note: The US website. You can click the source link for it.

lisa on

How do you know she hasn’t had a second or even a third opinion? As someone else mentioned she has mentioned back problems in the past. Maybe that too is a factor in her choice. As I stated before i’m sure she doesn’t feel the need to disclose her entire medical history. As for reading the comments here and changing her mind, I would hope that no woman would change her mind about something that serious by reading a message board comments section.


Christine on

thanks sarah.. i finally found it after i googled, and it took me to another site that had even more pictures, but now i can’t think of what the site was, 😦 sorry

bennean on

I am sorry that so many are up in arms about this topic. I am sorry that so many of the c/section moms on this board seem to think they are being attacked. I don’t think that is really the case.

Let me say, I had a c/section with child #1 and had a “normal” recovery…but still ended up with child in NICU for 4 days due to complications from delayed milk supply – yes, from the c/section. From the surgery itself (bowel problems) and the drugs (vomiting and incessant itching). Sorry if this is TMI but remember this is considered NORMAL for a c/section recovery. Mine was in no way considered exceptional. Of course, this doesn’t happen to everyone, for many it’s worse and for a few it’s better. Great if your experience was better…you are lucky!

My guess is that most of the moms who are anti-section…probably had a section themselves. I was never anti-section until I had one. I am certain that (at least most of them) are not judging anyone that had one…because probably most have had one themselves. They are just trying to get the word out so others don’t have to go through what they did…or if they do, it will be TRULY necessary and they will have been informed beforehand.

Also – c/sections do NOT mean healthy babies or healthy moms. Why is the USA so far down in the infant survival rates? I’ve heard we’re like 20th at the high end and 40th at the low end. I think just ahead of Cuba. We have the highest section rate in the world…if sections made for healthier babies, wouldn’t we be #1? Countries like the Netherlands with mostly natural childbirth are in the lead in this respect. Maybe fewer women are dying in childbirth these days due to better hygiene and nutrition, not more sections. Many babies born by elective section are born premature, since they did not get to select their own birth date. BUT…it keeps the NICUs in business.

Anyhow, this is not meant to offend anyone with a section. I am a member of that club. BUT, my doc didn’t tell me that a breech baby COULD be turned or birthed vaginally. I wasn’t given enough info to make an informed decision. He also didn’t tell me that my choices if I wanted a VBAC would be limited to fighting the hospital to move around during labor or having a homebirth. And that it would be very difficult to find a doctor that would attend a VBAC. He also didn’t tell me my section would increase the rate of complications such as miscarriage and placenta issues. My thing is – I don’t care what you choose, as long as you’re informed. I just hope the women who are reading these posts and still have a chance to make that decision, get informed before they make their decision. Section is in no way a failure…some are truly necessary and many that are unnecessary the mom did everything she knew to do. Not knowing is not the mom’s failure…it’s their caregiver’s failure. The ones I want to prevent are the ones that aren’t medically necessary, because it really can cause complications and limit your future options.

Anyhow, hope this discussion opens up some eyes. I wish someone had said this to me prior to mine…but I TRUSTED MY DOCTOR. Not sure I would have listened. BUT wish I would have known and listened.

Hope you all have a good day…and wishing Trista a healthy birth.

Bella on

Why does there have to be c-section vs vaginal, bottle vs breast debates so often? I am not saying that the discussions are not important in themselves but really why are people so very quick to judge on something that is NONE of their business? Mothers should be supportive of what facilitates the best outcome for other mothers and their children. You may have had a different experience and that’s fine but you don’t know the experiences of other people and what’s with piling on all the mummy guilt?

Morgan – I definitely agree with your comment – “Ive always looked forward to joining the “mommy-club” but in here it doesnt always seem as welcoming as it should.” I’m happily in that club but mothers are the most over critical people on the planet, especially of each other. It is sad really.

JR – I get the feeling you are trying to educate but I comes accross as lecturing. I don’t think that you need to pick tink1217’s comments apart.

And I don’t think it is c-section mums being over sensitive. I had a vaginal birth and I find a few of these comments a bit much.

terri on

I haven’t had a natural birth or a c-section and I don’t know why some are feeling attacked. I welcome the information and discussion. I like being informed because it means you can make better decisions in the future. Just because people are curious about the mention of a possible c-section and opening up dialogue about it, doesn’t mean that they’re judging her or you. I don’t get that feeling at all.

Jurnee on

Everyone needs to relax! Every birth is unique. Every child and parent is different and the physical and psychological aspects of birth differ greatly for everyone. Some small women have wider hips- some big, tall women are actually quite narrow. Some babies are positioned in a poor way to birth naturally, others may be in distress… there are so so many variations. What’s important is that mother and baby come out healthy and uninjured. Sometimes a c-section is medically necessary, other times, depending on a variety of factors, it is not.

I am 5 feet tall and my child was over had a 10lb. – I needed a c-section. The recovery was painful, breastfeeding was incredibly difficult with the incision and lack of movement I could make, and I needed months of physical therapy to recover. Certainly I would have preferred a natural birth had it been possible. Let’s not judge each other.

cheermama on

I just had to put in my 2 cents…

I am one of those moms who have had both- I had an emergency c-section with my 1st, and had a successful VBAC with my second son. I have the luck (if you can call it luck) to have experienced both. I will say first, that every mother’s body is different, and every birth is different. We should not be lecturing each other on what’s better- every one has a different opinion and we are entitled to that opinion. We don’t know the circumstances surrounding each birth, so I don’t feel that we can lecture. I do agree however that moms should be more educated about their choices. My section was done without me being educated as to the outcomes, and the risks, and I must say it was very hard for me to recover from it ( the docs left 4 sponges in me and had to go back in to remove them, lost a lot of blood, etc!). I did not “bounce back” 5 days later- it took me a good long 4 months to “feel” normal again (I however do not have sensation on the bottom part of my stomach still, and that was almost 4 years ago). My recent VBAC however, was the most empowering experience of my entire life. It hurt like hell, and I did end up getting an epidural at 7cm’s, but it was SO worth it! I felt better afterwards, I wasn’t groggy from drugs, and I was able to take care of my son right away (nursing was difficult with my first- the section prolonged the milk, and he didn’t get a first chance to nurse til about 5 hours after the birth, and babies should nurse within the first hour of birth…) I did so much research on the VBAC from the moment I found out I was pregnant, as well as research on repeat c-sections. I chose a VBAC because I want to have more children, and each repeat c-section increases your risks for complications later in life, as well as carrying risks to future fertility. I think we all have to remember that every outcome is different, every body is different, and that circumstances always change. No one is right or wrong for their method of childbirth- the goal is to have healthy babies. I myself chose a VBAC the second time around, and I also hired a doula (best money I spent on the whole process….look into it!) But I also read everything I could get my hands on (or could type into the computer) and started really looking at the pros and cons of each procedure. Only after reading and talking and asking questions did I come to my decision. Educating yourself is always the best, because then you have the power to decide for yourself what is best for you and baby, and don’t have to solely rely on the doc’s word alone. I was fortunate to have a doctor that would let me try for a VBAC (alot of docs don’t support them) and I asked questions the whole pregnancy. Research, research, research, and then make your informed decision. (sorry for the novel!)

Amanda on

I just want to say congratulations to Trista and Ryan, on the upcoming birht of their baby. I have followed Trista since she was on the Bachelor. I also followed her on the Bachelorette, I knew she would pick Ryan. For them you could tell it was love. I also watched their wedding when it aired on tv. I cried along with them. I am so glad they are finally having the baby they wanted. I wish them all the luck and joy.

Shannon on

I am really upset to see so many women on here attacking and counter-attacking each other. I have been fortunate enough to experience both vaginal and c-section births. I gave birth to my daughter vaginally and had a wonderful birth. She took less than 9 hours and 20 minutes of pushing. She was 8 lbs 5 oz. My water ruptured at hoome to start my labor, so there was no AROM. I also had an epidural at 6 cms. I recovered well, and brestfed until I had to go back to work and was no longer “allowed” to. (Whole different story on the inability of jobs to adapt for new mothers.) Three years later, I was pregnant with a son. My son was breech from 6 months gestation on. Nothing we did could turn him around. After going over the pros and cons of attempting a vaginal breech birth or a c-section, I opted for the latter. I can say also that this was a great experience for me. Yes, it was more convenient, with being able to schedule. I was fortunate to have no compications from the surgery, and was back up and walking around that evening, my milk came in at the same time it had with my first baby, and I had lost ALL of my baby weight by my first doctor’s appointment, 2 weeks post-partum. So I can’t give a horror story about either one. I had 2 very different, but both wonderful births, I feel in no less way a woman because of a section, when I have another, I don’t know yet which I will choose.

For those of you throwing around that every birth can be vaginal, and no one should have a c-section because there is always something that can be done to prevent it, that is not so. A lot of the time there are very logical and medical reasons that deem a section necessary. And I hate to point out to you, that more often than not, c-sections go just fine. All of these people on here who are talking about how so many things always go wrong must be a minority, because I have never known anyone who had a c-section with any problems. And I have known a lot of c-section moms.

Katherine on

Those tank tops are from the Hot Mom’s Club. Here is the link:


Natalie S. on

Trista ~ Congrats on your new/future bundle of joy!! Shannon I agree with you 100%, seems the majority of everyone is so judgmental and assume just because of their experience or ect.. they seems to “know it all”. I understand it’s everyones right to their own opinion but if Trista has opted to have a c-section then really who cares because it’s none of business but Trista & Ryan’s. I wish them nothing but the best!!! Congrats again!

ashley on

Who cares how she delivers her baby. Is it really going to matter afterwards? It’s nobody’s business but hers and her doctor’s. All this discussion over something thousands of women do daily. Get over it.

terri on

I don’t think anyone was being judgemental. It opened up a very informative discussion. I welcome being educated about all the options.

tink1217 on

i am so glad Trista chimed in on this!! Congrats again to Ryan and Trista! I hope her birth experience is wonderful REGARDLESS of how she gives birth!!!

Cathy on

When I was a child, there was a woman who lived on our street. She was hunched over until she was practically bent in half and my brothers (kids can be cruel) used to make fun of her, thankfully not to her face. My mother scolded them, and told them that she was like that due to complications experienced during childbirth. She had a home birth with a midwife, but when the large baby wouldn’t come out after a long time, the midwife wanted to call a doctor. The woman’s old-school husband refused to let a man “see his wife like that” so she had to push and push until the baby was born. The little girl suffered from lack of oxygen, and had difficulty walking and had a tube in her throat; still does. I know it was a long time ago, but it still happens. Also, my friend, who was obsessed with the idea of a vaginal deliver, would not let her doctor perform a c-section. She labored for over 24 hours but thankfully everything turned out ok (except that her recovery was longer and more painful). We can’t get all hung-up on our preferred means of childbirth. Every woman, every baby and every doctor is different. Successful delivery and the health of mother/child are all that matter.

mdterp on

I just want to say congrats to Trista and Ryan! I loved watching you guys on the bachlorette! How you are having the baby is a very private matter bewteen the two of you and your doctor and it isn’t for anyone else to judge. I just read an article from Conceive magazine about the struggles Trista and Ryan had getting pregnant. This baby is such a blessing no matter how it makes its entrance! Let’s all remember that and also that we shouldn’t judge others. Congrats to the both of you! You both have been waiting a long time for this!


mom to a beautiful 3 year old daughter and in the process of adopting from China!

k. on

Anna Nicole Smith.
What was she again? hmmmmm under 7 lbs if I remember correctly.
Run Trista run… if you truely care about your baby, your health and your life… Run.
at least get a doula.
And seriously people… if c/s were SO great and SO safe…. wouldn’t doctors stop harping on tying your tubes after two? How many women have their childbearing decisions made for them from this safe lovely abdominal surgery? Cover thine own ass is more like it, safety is in the eyes of the doctor.
I’ve had a c/s and two vaginal births… one with a fourth degree tear. I’ll take the tear over surgery ANY DAY!

Kaapsemeisie on

Wow, she actually had to come back and clarify?! What business is it of anyone’s how she CHOOSES to deliver HER child? Man, people are so judgemental. My first child was HUGE (let’s just say that the delivery wasn’t pretty), and with the second (who was slated to be big as well due to genetics & GD) I chose to have a c-section. My business, my body. I wish anyone had said anything to me that was negative!! Grrr. My son was healthy after his c-section delivery, and his mama was happy. End of story. Good luck with your delivery, Trista. However it happens for you;-)

lizzielui on

It’s such a shame that Trista had to take time out of her life to set the record straight to a bunch of judgemental folks whom she doesn’t even know. People make decisions that they feel are important to them, based on the circumstances they are experiencing in their lives. WE SHOULD ALL RESPECT THAT. As women we should stop being so hard on one another and be supportive and hopeful that both mother and child have a happy, healthy birthing experience.

Twin_mamma on

The whole “baby is too big for you” thing is a cop-out. Unless the head is actually measured as being too large to fit through the mother’s pelvic inlet, a big baby is not an actual medical reason for a C-section…sheesh. I guess there is a reason we have the highest C-section rate (at 30.2%) when most other countries are much, much lower. The World Health Organization states that there is no justifiable reason why the rate should ever be higher than 10-15%.

Carrie on

Wow – despite Trista being conscientious enough to explain her statements (which don’t, frankly, need to be explained just because a bunch of know-it-all strangers threw a fit), she’s still getting criticized! We can all write reasons we’ve heard of through personal or through-the-grapevine experiences on why C-sections are unnecessary or put people in needless jeopardy, but there’s nothing wrong with a woman being mentally prepared for any and all possibilities on delivery day. And a doctor who keeps an open mind and helps mentally prepare a woman for all of the ins and outs and variables of delivering a baby is a more responsible one than the one who insists on only the one absolutely natural road, and when that patient has to have the dreaded C-section for one “medical reason” or another, that woman is embarrassed, disappointed, and preoccupied with her “failure” rather than the miracle needing her attention from that point on. Let’s stop all of the proselytizing and just appreciate the good news of Trista and Ryan, and hope for a smooth delivery for all, and MOST importantly, a healthy baby.

ap on

Good for her! Hopefully her comments will make some readers think twice before jumping to such unbelievably judgmental and self-righteous conclusions. Wouldn’t that be nice?

Loralee on

After having three c-sections (first-breech and large 9 lbs 4oz., second attempted vbac and third repeat c-section due to transverse position-he wouldn’t turn) at some point you have to trust your doctor. There may be medical reasons for a possible c-section that only Trista, her husband and her doctor know. I wish her a safe and healthy delivery no matter how the baby is delivered. Whether you have a baby vaginally (w or w/out medication) or via csection or via adoption we are all mothers and should respect that and stop judging each other.

yogadaisy on


Thanks for your comments. I enjoyed watching your courtship with Ryan on The Bachlorette and was rooting from him from the start! You got a great guy.

I was one of the original comments that expressed concern over your doctors comments. I hate to see something planted so early on that might predispose your birth to go a certain way. I do understand being educated about the many things that may happen during birth, although I feel that epidurals are mostly to blame for c-sections. If the mom cannot move around during contractions, walk, wiggle her hips, lean over and make room for the baby to descend the birth canal the baby often gets “stuck”, necessitating surgery. Especially if the baby is large to begin with.

I think your best chance for a natural birth (or anyones!) is to practice pain management, hire a doula, and avoid an epidural. I know everyone is different but I will tell you that I am quite petite myself (5’1″, 100 lbs pre-preg) and birthed four babies naturally, one of whom was 9.3!

You can do it! Blessings to you and Ryan on your upcoming birth.

BB on

I have always really liked Trista & Ryan. They seem like a very nice couple & it’s awesome that they have found such happiness. I must say that although debates are always informative & everyone is entitled to an opinion, it really makes reading the posts much less enjoyable to have people acting like such know it all’s & so judging. I’m sorry that Trista even felt for a second that she had to justify her personal healthcare choices to anyone else, but she sure did handle it in a polite & classy manner. Maybe there should be another spot on CBB to debate such topics? so that those of us that are really not interested in being exposed to such blatant negativity don’t have to be. Also, one of the other posters mentioned an interview with Ryan & Trista regarding their trials getting pregnant that was featured in conceive mag. Any chance of seeing any of that interview? Thanks so much.

Sarah’s note: I linked the Conceive mag article up top for you and others who are interested. We may run a piece on it soon focusing on the fertility issues.

As far as having somewhere else on CBB to debate, we have thought of a message board but decided it would not be a good idea as we would not be able to moderate as we’d like to.

In the past two weeks, (after this original post was put live on the site) we’ve been much tougher on comments, but if people want to debate their points and are able to express themselves maturely without insulting other posters, that’s something we will allow.

We do wish people were more able to say, ‘I think’ ‘I feel,’ ‘In my opinion,’ ‘such and such study says’ rather than the blanket judgmental statements that often come across.

That said, many of readers have told us they find many debates informative. We’re always happy to hear anyone’s feedback at tips@celebrity-babies.com

Veroncia on

I don’t usually comment because my opinions are mine alone and I don’t feel the need state them everytime I read soemthing that I don’t agree with. I think it’s sad that Trisha felt she had to come here to defend the way she MIGHT give birth to HER child to a group of people don’t know her or anything about HER SITUATION. There are too many people in the world that don’t have anything better to do than judge others, and try to force their small-minded beliefs on anyone who would listen. Let the woman alone, and get a life.

MMM on

I agree with lizzielui, but pretty much stopped reading all of these posts after the 4th one about how tiny people are (really, are weight and height necessary on a public board, or are you just bragging?), how they had a big baby, how their birth experience was the best, and how their choice was superior to everyone elses. That may not be how they are trying to sound, but that is how a lot of these posts are coming across.

It is sad that we have to be so judgmental to a stranger about their birthing experience that she hasn’t even had yet. She never said that she wanted a c-section or that her doctor wanted to give her one so that they could then go play golf. Ugh, come on ladies, let’s play nice.

By the way Trista, I live in Denver if you want to have a playdate:)

Allison on

Trista, Congrats on trying the “natural route.” I hope it works for you. It did for me.

I am a small woman, my husband is 6’4″ and 250lbs, and I managed to deliver a 9lb baby with no pain medication or epidurals. I also am a redhead and have a very low pain tolerance. If I can do it, anyone can.

The difference for me was hiring a doula to support me during my labor and delivery, plus to help after delivery with the breastfeeding and latching on.

I HIGHLY recommned hiring a doula to be with you when you give birth. My husband was initally against it, but after the birth, he told everyone that the $500 we paid the doula was the “best money” he ever spent!

Another bonus of natural delivery: since I had no epidural or pain meds, I was up walking around 1/2 hour after giving birth. I could go the bathroom by myself (no catheter) and care for my son quite well. I still felt sore and tired, but was happy I could move around so quickly.

Best of luck to you and Ryan!!!

yogadaisy on

MMM, Regarding your comment about the reason posters have stated their height and weight, perhaps you missed it but Trista stated, “…the possibility that I will need to undergo a c-section is higher than normal. This is due to the fact that I am of relatively small size,…”

So, the reason I stated my height and weight was to show that it does not matter how small one is, one can most definitely vaginally birth a 9+lb baby regardless of size. I added that avoiding an epidural greatly increases the odds of avoiding a surgical delivery because I believe that is the MOST important factor in the increase in surgical deliveries.

I also want to add to those who have stated that it doesn’t matter how the baby is born just that Mom and baby are healthy. If so, why do so many Moms hope for a vaginal delivery? Of course, the ultimate goal is a healthy baby and Mom but a satisfactory birth experience makes a huge difference in Moms emotional and physical recovery and studies show that women delivered surgically suffer from post-partum depression more often that those with vaginal deliveries. It’s important!

Jenne on

I would like to thank Trista for her kindness and generosity in opening up her life to strangers (several times now!) Welcome to the great mommy debates! People will try to tell you that if your actions don’t match their beliefs, that you’re ill-informed or your doctor is incompetent, but as you already know, you and your doctor know your body the best. All you need to worry about is your health and your baby’s health and have a happy pregnancy! It’s such a miraculous time!

Jessica L. on

I find it very unfortunate that Trista felt like she had to defend herself to a bunch of nit-picky blog readers. I can understand why she did it and I don’t fault her for it, but women are so damn judgemental of one another sometimes it makes me sick. Especially those women who are mothers. Worry about your own pregnancy and your own children and don’t try to dictate to others how they should go about things just because you think you know what’s best for them based on your “research” or your own personal experience.

Everyone’s birth experience is different, obviously. I chose to have an epidural with my daughter after going through 17 hours of labor and deciding I didn’t want the pain anymore. The catheter was removed before I started pushing and was never replaced and I didn’t need a bed pan or anything afterwards, I made it to the bathroom on my own. Since I had her at 9:30 at night, I slept ’til 3am before I had to use the restroom and I got up on my own and walked unassisted to the bathroom. Not every woman is bedridden for hours after an epidural.

I just think we need to be more supportive of one another as women and mothers and not be so critical. We’d all probably be a lot happier in the end.

millie on

I can’t believe how judgmental some of the comments are. I had two kids vaginally but I WISH my second was a C-section. I was overdue and after 3 months of bedrest, the baby’s head was in 95th percentile and after 2 hours of pushing (and 20 plus hrs of labor) I wasn’t able to get him out. I was running a fever (baby ended up with a fever as well) and my ob-gyn had to use a vacuum to get him out in the end. I suppose, according to some of you, I failed as a woman. This wasn’t the worst part, however. I ended up with a back injury (due again to the baby’s head passing though the birth canal), in tremendous, incapacitating pain for months.. several months of physical therapy eventually helped but I wish someone thought of a different route. Bottom line: who cares how the baby is born as long as both mom and baby are fine in the end.

KarenC on

Really it is nobody else’s business how someone delivers a baby. It is her body and
her recovery.

Lauren on

yogadaisy, I have no idea why you feel so compelled to judge Trista and mothers who have c-sections the way you do, but you really need to stop. You have no problem complaining that you and other moms who breastfeed in public get unfairly picked on, yet here you are making presumptuous comments about Trista and her birthing plans. From her very clear, outlined statement, it sounds to me like Trista is more than aware of all of her options and has her baby’s best interests in mind. My mother’s godson would have likely died had he not been born via c-section, as would his mother. I suppose his mother is a failure because she didn’t deliver him vaginally? Do you suppose she would have had a better “emotional and physical recovery” had she had a natural birth and lost her son?
I have no idea why it is so important to you that some celebrities you don’t even know have natural, medication-free births. You have made it perfectly clear that you had several, med-free births; why are you not content to be satisfied with your own experiences and acting like it’s your way or the highway? Are you a doctor of some sort? Because you tend to make very blanketed statements without any hard proof to back them up, and it gets old fast. I apologize for singling you out, but you do this sort of thing all the time.
I am completely sick of this natural birth vs. c-section debate, and I know many others are also. The high and mighty attitudes displayed by some people are pathetic. Trista, if you’re reading this: don’t worry about what other people say. Focus instead what is most comfortable for you and your baby is. Best of luck!

Why not? on

Nature and hundreds of years tells us that womens bodies conform and allow for babies of ALL sizes to be born…safely and successfully. Studies show that epidural, no movement during labor and inducing can lead to the baby being unable to labor down correctly resulting in csections.
Why just let it ‘be’? Why not get FACTUAL information out there? This attitude of “do whatever is right for YOU, no matter what” is SICKENING. It’s an ignorant thing to think and to continue to perpetuate. I know it’s hard to believe but sometimes people aren’t educated and never thought TO be. Doctors are not gods….they are fallible human beings. Size has NOTHING to do with a woman being able to give birth. There is no such thing as ‘small bones’ and ‘big bones’. Fat and muscle make the difference in size, not bones. My uterus and pelvis expanded to house my child. I am barely 5 feet and 100lbs. I birthed an 8 and half pound child with a head size in the 99 percentile. I did not tear. I had no episotomy. It wasn’t not due to luck. It was due to correct labor practices and knowledge.
I don’t think anyone is saying ending up with a csection makes you a “failure as a woman”. Obviously, the health of the baby is most important. One mother is not “better” than another because they toughed it out and did it natural…versus someone who got the epidural straight off. However, every mother owes it to herself and her child to be educated and not rely solely on what a doctor says. Ask questions! Read! Do not except an answer because “they said so”. You are your only advocate.

caroline on

“I am a small woman, my husband is 6’4″ and 250lbs, and I managed to deliver a 9lb baby with no pain medication or epidurals. I also am a redhead and have a very low pain tolerance. If I can do it, anyone can.”

How does the color of your hair have anything to do with your threshhold for pain?

IRS on

Wow, I am so sorry that there is so much hostility on both sides. I did have an unnecessary section with my first for ftp fast enough for my midwife. I think the thing that makes me saddest is the fact that once you research the history of birth you find that now and for some time mothers and babies have both been robbed of the joy of a painful and empowering birth experience. I hope that these dialogs instead of drawing a line the sand against the ‘other’ side we, as mothers learn to stand together to not just accept what ‘birth specialist’ say to us about OUR bodies, our children and corner us to base decisions on fear. Fear of a big baby, fear of a painful or unbearable experience, fear of surgery, fear of losing control, fear of loss of life, etc. If one feels that surgical birth is the best for them – I will not judge but please make sure it is not because a doctor put fear in your heart that you couldn’t do it. Remember being healthy means being emotionally healthy too. Lets use our voices to honor each other and our birth experiences. As for my personal opinion – We are all perfectly designed to birth our children. Allow us not to believe the lies that we cannot!

tara on

to the person who made the comment “Nature and hundreds of years tells us that womens bodies conform and allow for babies of ALL sizes to be born…safely and successfully”, sorry but this is untrue. Modern medicine has greatly increased the survival rate for both pregnant women and the babies they are carrying. In the past if a woman had a baby that was in a position or too large to be born, this could cause either the woman or the baby to die. Sorry to disappoint but “natural” isn’t always best…some women HAVE to have medical intervention (ie C-sections). And honestly, who cares what way a baby comes into this world, whether it’s through the “all-natural” way or through a c-section.

Also, if a woman feels that she doesn’t want to experience all the pain of giving birth then so be it, if she wants to have an epidural or pain medication via IV then go for it, same with if you want to feel everything and have no pain medication what-so-ever. A woman’s body is her own and she has the right to do with it what she will.

Also, as someone who comes from a family of doctor’s I assure you that a doctor 9 times out of 10 will do what is best for their patient and their patients unborn child. Why put the child at risk if it isn’t necessary, women can’t labor for 2 days after their water has broke, the more time that passes the higher the risks are for both baby and mother. This goes the same for pre-eclampsia (sp) which is a condition that is life-threatning that is only solved by giving birth, or should we let nature take it’s course and have the mother die while laboring away because god forbid she have a c-section.

I was born via c-section, had I not I would have died. My mother wasn’t vain when she opted for the c-section, she wasn’t uninformed, she wasn’t shirking off the pain of childbirth either (as anyone who has ever had a c-section can tell you it’s no picnic)–she and her doctor made the decision that was in the best interest for both her and for me. I am thankful for that decision.

Jody on

I’m so excited for Trista & Ryan. It was a neat experience to watch the two meet, fall and love and get married. I hope they share some pics of the baby when s/he comes. Best of luck to Family Sutters.

ivey on

this is a tough debate because their are multiple reasons for a possible c-section vs vaginal delivery. If we a debating the size of the woman vs the size of the baby then enough said, women died very often in childbirth, before c-sections, because of the baby being to big. It has nothing to do with how tall you are either.

I would love to discuss/debate other things such as midwife vs. hospital delivery.

Or the water breaking by the doctor, or on its own.

Anyway I’m like the 700th post here, so this will probably slide right through.

women should be allies on

We women are our own worst enemy. We will pick at another woman (with our comments) until we make her bleed. I see this all the time on threads about Britney Spears, Angelina Jolie and most recently Heidi Klum and now with Trista. Some of you take a celebrity’s comment, edited by a magazine writer, and then go on to make some of the most judgmental assumptions. Trista shouldn’t have to defend her birthing experience. It is HER experience afterall.

Abbey on

Geez, you people do not know how to read. She simply said her doctor was preparing her for the POSSIBILITY. I fail to see anything in there about a planned c-section. Emergencies happen (I was an unplanned c-section). My father was 10 lbs when he was born and my grandmother told me the vaginal birth horror story. I’m sure she wishes she had the option of being cut open by someone who knew what they were doing rather than having a baby completely tear her up. You just never know. To each her own, anyway. Do what you want in your birth and let whoever do whatever she wants in hers. It’s a personal experience. People should do it the way they want. Just be supportive of life.

sg on

Congratulations Trista!! Though I am not a mother I will share stories from my family’s experiences.
My cousin was never told about the possibility of a c-section, was wholeheartedly prepared for a vaginal birth but ended up having a c-section and completely freaked out and panicked! So I’m glad Trista’s doc has made her aware of ALL outcomes just in case so there are NO surprises. My BF gave birth vaginally but used an epidural and she wiggled her hips and lifted her legs and was completely NOT immoblile in her bed. She was up and moving around like NOTHING right away. My other friend was in labor for over 24 hours because her baby was stuck, she pushed, walked around, switched positions but nothing. Since her baby was not in distress, the doc would not do a c-section. Clearly, doctors do not jump at the chance to give them because my friend suffered until a vacuum was finally used to get her baby girl out. She had such a horrible experience that she will NEVER have more babies. This was over 4 years ago.

The point I am trying to make is that every situation is different and yes people should be informed and educated but at the same time you cannot shove advice down people’s throats. In the end all you can do is share YOUR experiences and knowledge and wish people the best in THEIR situation.
While there are many things that can be done to help in labor, there is no certainty that it will be smooth.

If our bodies always “knew” what to do we would not be dying of cancer or any other diseases that are out there. I am glad that doctors spend the YEARS they do educating themselves for the benefit of humankind and while I agree mistakes are made, I will always respectfully value their advice whether I agree with it or not.

Sorry it’s so long, got carried away!

PSB on

bennean –

Sorry, but I had to address one aspect of your post – the reason why the infant mortality rate in the US is higher than other developed countries is not because of c-sections, it is because we have more older (40+) moms having babies through fertility drugs than other country and also more “higher risk” births in general (people who normally would not be able to get and stay pregnant to term or who have a history of genetic defects/diseases).

With the increase in fertility drug/procedure usage, there is also an increase in early labor from older moms and moms who have had early labor in the past or conditions such as preeclampsia, etc.

I am ALL for women having babies whatever way they possibly can at any reasonable age (my personal preference is for women to stop in their late 40’s, but who am I to judge?), but there is ALWAYS a bigger risk of early labor with higher risk pregnancies. The fact that in the US we are able to keep many of these babies alive shows how advanced our medical system is here.

I’m sorry, I just hate when statistics are taken out of context.

As for c-sections—I don’t think any woman actively wants to have abdominal surgery, but we should not be made to feel bad about it if it happens. I am a c-section mom who hopes to have a vbac next time, so I am definitely in support of research and being your own healthcare advocate. However, we need to keep the eye on the prize. The prize is the baby! In a perfect world we would all conceive easily and naturally and have drug-free, quick and healthy births, but this is not an ideal world.

Victoria on

I weighed 120 pounds before getting pregnant and am 5’5″. I had a VERY difficult time getting my two children in each birth through the birth canal and under my pelvic bone, vacuum assist and fundal pressure for both required to get the baby out! Both of my children were average weight.

I have a good friend who is 5’2″ and probably weighs about 100 pounds soaking wet and gave birth quite easily to pretty big babies! She has, according to her OB, a pelvic bone PERFECTLY suited for childbirth. Most often it depends on the actual shape of your pelvic opening (the bones), rather than whether you are “big” or “small”. It’s also very often a matter of a few centimeter difference in the pelvic bone opening that will predict whether you have an “easy” delivery or a “difficult” one. All the other stuff (tissue, muscle, ligaments,etc.) just stretch (or unfortunately tear) no matter how big or small framed you are.

Myself, an average sized woman, has a pelvis not favorable for childbirth. Many doctors don’t take the time to do the simple measurements to determine your pelvic bone size.

Also depends on the presentation of the head of the baby. Some presentations are more difficult, some easier.

wavybrains on

I’m due in September like Trista. I’m also totally committed to a vaginal, drug-free, midwife assisted childbirth. But, also like Trista, I’ve got diabetes and a family history of big babies as well as some other medical issues. As much as I *want* to and *plan* to have a “natural” childbirth, I’m also well aware that there are plenty of situations where a c-section is the best option. Any birth scenario that ends in both the baby and I alive and healthy will be “success” in my book. It only makes sense for all first time mothers to be educated about pain meds, c-section, interventions, even if you plan a drug-free birth. I’m glad Trista’s doctor gave her the chance to talk about the possibility of a c-section. Education and communication are key. Trista, I hope we both have the births we hope for, but I’m also glad we’re in good hands if things don’t go according to the ideal. I wish the other commenters could be as flexible and well-educated as you seem to be. My respect for you increased 100-fold with your statement. You rock.

sil on

“Really it is nobody else’s business how someone delivers a baby. It is her body and
her recovery.”
I totally agree with this comment!!!
and I think is kind of boring to read all this loooong comments, I mean it’s ok to say what we think and is interesting to read what other people think, but this is too much for me, it sounds like people get mad here! Come on, is not a big deal how this woman is going to have her baby, she is a grown up and inteligent person, so she can decide whatever is better for her or her baby. Is much better if we just wish her luck and all the happiness for her and her family.

Diabetic mom-to-be on

Trista has gestational diabetes. When you develop a condition such as that, your labor and delivery wishes can get thrown out the window.

We are very fortunate today to have many medical advances in the care of diabetic pregnancies, such as glucose monitoring, ultrasounds, non-stress tests and growth scans to monitor the baby’s development. However, just 30 years ago, babies of diabetic mothers frequently DIED IN UTERO OR DURING CHILDBIRTH WITH NO WARNING.

Today, doctor’s take extra special care with diabetic mothers to ensure this does not happen. The sacrifice, however, is that diabetic mothers don’t always have full say in their birth plans. They are usually induced around 38 weeks, due to placental deterioration or other complications. And regardless of how well a diabetic woman controls her diet and blood sugar during pregnancy, there is the potential for the baby to be large.

While a nondiabetic woman may CHOOSE to have a C-Section based on the potential size of the baby, with a diabetic mother, the standard practice guidelines in the US call for a C-Section if the growth scan at 38 weeks measures 9 pounds, 6 ounces or more. It is not the mother’s choice, it is the decision of the doctor and the hosptial, who are ultimately liable if they do not follow these established guidelines and the mother or child are harmed.

Trista has said she would like to have as natural a birth as possible, but she trusts her doctor to make the right decision for her. If you are not in her shoes, you cannot possibly understand what it has likely taken for her to be OK with this decision.

Nicole on

I have to put in my two-cents because in all honesty the things people are saying on this site are hurtful and rude.

Trista is PREPARING for the POSSIBILITY of having to have a c-section due to a large baby. I can understand her doctor telling her that there may be a possibility of the baby being big. As a small woman too, I can’t imagine that I would be able to handle the vaginal delivery of a large baby. I had enough trouble getting my little 7 pounder out.

Birth is not a race… it is not a competition with the rest of the female child-bearing gender. It is an experience unique to each person, yea, we’re all having babies, but in the end that is likely the only similarity. Who cares how the baby gets here as long as once it is here, he or she is healthy and happy and in the arms of the people who worked so hard to get him/her here? You aren’t getting a medical for a natural birth, you aren’t getting punished for having a c-section instead of delivering vaginally. The only true reward at the end of this process is a baby, YOUR baby. Birth is your experience… and if things don’t go as planned and you have to have a c-section, get an epidural or whatever, then go with it.

It’s not a race people… nor is it a competition. Let her deal with this in her own way, and with her doctor, who obviously knows her history better than people on a website do. I’m sure that the doctor wasn’t trying to scare her or anything, but more trying to make her aware of what could happen, and that to me is better than a doctor who pops into the laboring mother’s room and says ‘oh yea, your babies too big, so we’re gonna do a c-section,’ and gives no warning ahead of time or gives the mother a chance to prepare.

We all have choices to make… and in the end, the only people who matter in those choices are the mother, father, and the doctor, as they are the ones working together to achieve the ultimate goal of a happy healthy baby.

TwinMom on

Maybe I lucked in, but when I was in labour with my twins, I ASKED my OB to do a c-section. I’d been having contractions for more than 24 hours (I was induced), but because I wasn’t dilating and the babies were handling it very well, the OB opted to wait. I’m glad now that he said because everything fell into place and I gave birth vaginally. I was warned early on in the pregnancy about the high possibility of requiring a c-section… which is also why they advised me to take the epidural… so in case I need a c-section at the last minute, I would actually be awake. I found that (in my hospital anyway!) they tried to avoid a c-section.

As for big babies, I was 10 lbs 5 oz and my mother gave birth to me vaginally with no epidural. She said I was the easiest birth of all 3 children. But I can understand a very large baby posing a problem for a smallish woman. For example, my brother is 6′ 5″ and his wife is 4′ 11″. Both her babies were 8 lbs + and required a section because of their size and the fact that my S.I.L. had gestational diabetes. Sometimes it’s necessary and I don’t know why some people freak out over OTHER women possibly requiring a c-section. They act like it’s the most horrible thing in the world.

Jennifer on

I too am tired of women beating up on each other! Since when is there only one “right” way to do things. I had an emergency C-section with my first child (he weighed 9 lbs. 11 oz. and got “stuck” as I have a small pelvis bone) and everything was fine for me. I had an elective C-section with my second child and again everything was fine. The C-sections are what was right for me at the time given the circumstances. Giving birth is a personal experience and I’m tired of women giving other women a hard time about C-sections. Why can’t women just support each other?

Allison on

I participated in a groundbreaking study in the city that I live in regarding “natural redheads”, their need for anesthesia, pain tolerance and need for pain medication. It was performed at the U. of Louisville medical school.

Results from the study showed that natural redheads, esp. women, have a lower than normal tolerance for pain, need 20% more anesthesia during surgery, and require 20% more pain medication than people of other hair colors. Go figure!!

The study has been replicated a couple of times and and the results are the same each time.

Melissa 7/7/78 on

Hey Whynot? I’ll be sure to ask for YOUR opinion for the birth of my next child rather than my doctor’s opinion.

anonymous on

Here’s to hoping that you are able to do some proactive healthcare research on how maternal size doesn’t affect ability to give birth vaginally and that gestational diabetes is one of the most commonly overdiagnosed conditions during pregnancy and isn’t based on research whatsoever. If your doctor has already opened the discussion for cesarean then that is already one foot in the door. Nice doctor or no, once women are in labor the malpractice insurance protocols make their appearance. A doctor who will mention the possibility of a c-section before a woman has had a strong trial of labor is not a doctor who is supportive of natural childbirth.

Diana on

I am very very impressed with Trista’s response and have great respect for how she responded. I personally would have had something not very nice to say if people had the nerve to comment about how I choose to give birth. ITS NO ONES BUSINESS! Its her body and should be her choice, even if she WAS choosing to do a C-section just because she wanted to, than its HER RIGHT!! But she wasn’t even SAYING THAT, even before she came to clarify I already knew she was saying that she was preparing for the POSSIBILITY of a c-section, she said that it in the first place. But so many jumped on her saying that she was having a planned C-section.

I don’t understand how someone else choosing to have a C-section, or even just Possibly having a c-section concerns anyone else??? People need to mind their own business.

Melissa on

Why is everyone so concerend about HER decision? Does it matter HOW her baby comes into the world? No wonder women that have c/sections feel like falures when it is other women themselves pushing all natural childbirth or you are not a good mom. Give me a break! I have had 4 c/sections and each one was great! I had no issues and I am NOT a failure- my kids are just as healthy, smart and beautiful as the next and my mothering skills are not dependant on how my children entered this world, mearly how I parent them in it.
I was a labor and delivery nurse for 4 years and I saw MANY women that ended up with problems delivering for large babies and small pelvis’. Anyone that says your body will only give you what you can handle is dead wrong as childbirth used to be the number one killer of women in the world prior to modern medicine. Sure, many women can do it just fine but there are those that don’t and can’t for various reasons and they are no less of a mother or woman because of it.

gigi on

My only advice to pregnant women is this:
Never listen to anybody’s labor stories. Intentions are good, but for a woman to hear horror stories does no good. Yours will be unique to you. Best of luck. (Ryan is adorable, love him!)

Kaley on

People need to stop being so close-minded on the idea of c-sections. I don’t condone people having elective c-sections just because they are scared of pain (like Britney Spears) but some women are really small down there and their babies are big. Some people need to stop being so judgmental.

twin_mamma on

The problem with celebrities sharing their birth plans (which more often than not include planned C-sections out of convenience) is that it gives young, ill-informed Moms-to-be the idea that a C-section is a good option for them as well. Not saying that there aren’t actual medical reasons to have them, but they are WAY over-preformed.

sage on

I gave brith naturally to my daughter and one of my closest friends had a c-section.Well we were with a bunch of ladies and we were sharing our birth stories, she didn’t say a word. I asked her why and she was afraid that someone was going to judge her make a rude comment like why on earth would she ever have a c-section. Sometime I think women who had natural births feel superior to those who don’t. The reason is that people want to feel that their decision was the best choice, and being closed minded and her another mother along the way.

C-section no c-section just remember that doesn’t determine how good a mother you are

Devon on


Do you want to tell that to my Grandmother who lost her child during childbirth because he was too big for her tiny frame? The doctor didn’t want to do a c-section, which she was asking for, and she was forced to give birth to a stillborn baby boy who weighed over 10 lbs. Maternal size does affect your ability to give birth.

After this incident, the doctors swore they would never let another one of my Grandmother’s children get to be that size before delivering. Well, the same thing almost happened again when my uncle was born. He was 10 lbs plus and she almost lost him but a c-section was performed and he survived.

The baby who died during child birth would be alive today if my Grandmother’s doctors weren’t idiots and had given her a c-section.

Trista is entitled to have her baby the way she wants to. It’s her baby.

mmsangel on

actually I’m surprised she even addressed this. shocked. as for the ‘small frame’ line, do your research, the actual percentage of people who are CPD (or unable to birth babies due to small frame) is very very small statistically and can not come close to accounting for the increase in unnecessary cesarean surgeries. Also, when looking at the maternal and fetal death rates in the 70’s, when the c-section rate was around 5% there is no explanation for why our c-section rate lingers around 30% now and the maternal and fetal death rates are not statistically much different.

J on

My aunt is 4’9″ and almost died delivering her 10 pound son. She had to have an emergency C-section and it ruined some major organs and now her body drains through tubes in her armpits. I’m sure she’d love to know that her body should have been able to handle it. Untrue and insensitive, wow.

txgal on

“It is not the mother’s choice, it is the decision of the doctor and the hosptial, who are ultimately liable if they do not follow these established guidelines and the mother or child are harmed.”

I just have comment about this, it is always YOUR CHOICE, you may CHOOSE to take the advice of your doctor, but ultimately you make the choice and ultimately you must live with it. Everyday in this country women are unnecessarily cut open, because they think they must blindly do whatever the almighty doctor says. It is your responsibility as a mother to research the risks and benefits of a procedure and MAKE A CHOICE. The research is there for everyone to see, look at it.

madam pince on

I’m sorry, but the anti-csection posters have just gone off the rails. Trista was very clear that c-section was a possibility, not a definite decision. Although my daughter was born vaginally, I’ve had friends who had c-sections for various reasons. Only one knew in advance, and hers was because of a pre-existing health condition. The rest found themselves unable to push their babies out, or the babies were in distress. Women and babies died in labor when c-section wasn’t available, so don’t look back so fondly.

Laura on

It really amazes me how judgemental many mothers can be. I had an elective c-section and it really was a great experience. I didn’t have to experience contractions or traditional labour. This was exactly what I wanted. Not all women are the same in their desire to have a vaginal birth. I had my c-section and was up and walking the next morning without any major problems. I recovered within a few days and was able to walk several blocks in less than a week. I can also barely see my incision. I live in Toronto where there are OBs who will perform c-sections by request. Because of my positive experience, two friends of mine also had planned c-sections and we’re pleased with the end result. C-sections are more difficult to recover from when they are emergency ones, not when they are planned like mine. People should live and let live and mind their own business. What matters most is the health of the baby and mother.

All that said, I think Trista sounds completely reasonable, and foresees that it is likely she will end up with a c-section due to genetics. It’s smart to prepare for the possibility of a c-section for whatever reason, because the more informed you are as to vaginal and c-section births, the quicker your mental and physical recovery. All the best to her and Ryan!


Sharon on

Dear Trista, I’m a 30 year old single woman, from Israel. Your shows are aired here in the holyland, And you have been a big insperation to me, in my search for a soul mate. Mostly the way you have handled yourself in “The Bachelorette”, being a woman of the 21st century, while maintaining your traditional values. Also the fact that you were able to keep an optimistic attitude, about finding the one.

I wish you a safe delivery & a healthy baby, plus much joy for the years to come.

Courtney on

It seems like there is a negativity towards c-sections. Are all c-section needed? No. But there are some neccesary due to complications arising with the mother and the baby.
I had my son at 30 weeks due to pre-eclampsia. Additionally, he had the cord wrapped around his neck, was losing amniotic fluid, and his heart rate was continuously dropping. My blod pressure was around 205/115 when I had him and that was with plenty of the mag. in me.
To this day, knowing he will be the only son I will ever be able to have, I feel like I didn’t do the right thing and try to wait it out and have him vaginally. But, so many risks outweight that. He could of died, or I could of died in the process of trying to tough it out.
There are instances where a c-section is medically neccesary and I think thats when the life of the mother and the life of the baby is in danger.
On the day he was released from the NICU, there was an adorable 10lb baby girl admitted because she was born with a broken collar bone because vaginal delivery was attempted.
Again…I think that is something the OB shoud have forseen.
I don’t see the point in have a c-section for it to be an easy way out…because it isn’t. Also, recovery from a c-section is different for every woman who has it done. I heard horror stories from my aunts, and friends. Needless to say I was up and walking the next day and healed up quickly.

Jay on

I think that her doctor was more so preparing her for the chances of a c-section. Mine did as well for the same reason, not that they werent’ planning on trying EVERYTHING first, but for giving me time to come to the terms that it might not go the way I wanted.

I was in and out of the hospital having induction after induction, finally after 3 failed ones they admitted me and started drugs to make the cervix softer and eventually break my water. After several hours I never progress anymore than 4cm. It was then, practically 3 days later, they called a c-section. I was calm and ready, BECAUSE I had been warned. Going into any surgery is stressful, and no one wants a pregnant woman stressed in that situation.

I think her pregnancy and birth are between her and her doctor. I would assume they try everything first, and it sounds like thats the plan.

A on

First of all, I don’t get all the angry reactions, it has been stated clearly by Trista that she might have to have a c-section due to medical reasons. Who are you people to judge that?

It seems that this disucssion has moved into some kind of competition as to what is a better way to deliver your child. We all have our opinions, and we’re entitled to them, so there’s no sense in arguing.
Where I come from (Iceland) there is no such thing as an elective c-section without medical motives. It is simply not an option. C-sections are only performed if there is a medical indication that the health of the baby and/or the mother is protected better by having the surgery. The condition of both mother and baby during pregnancy are considered, as well as possible genetic complications and the family’s medical history. And of course, emergence c-sections are performed when needed.
I respect everyone who opts for a c-setion because of the family’s medical history or other related reasons, but I have a big problem accepting c-sections that are performed because of convenience only. I know people who planned c-sections for the births of both of their children because they wanted them to be born on the same day. Another family planned a c-section so that the grandparents could be present (they were going away on a holiday). This I just don’t get.

But I guess that people are allowed to do things their way, and who am I to get upset? It’s their body and their child, so the decision is entirely theirs as well.

ps. I have natural red hair and a friend of mine (who is also a redhead) was involved in a research that found that (some) redheads are actually very well equiped to handle pain. I often don’t notice it when I’ve hurt meself until someone points out to me that I’m bleeding or have a bruise. So not all redheads have low pain thresholds πŸ™‚

TR on

Who really cares how Trista Sutter or anyone else has their babies? As long as she has a healthy baby and she is doing fine afterwards, that is all that really matters people!!

Kate on

Just a comment about size…

My OB said that the size of a woman does not matter when it comes to childbirth. I’m a great example – I’m 5’1″ and 103 lbs and gave birth naturally to two girls – both around 8 lbs. They actually were both out in 3 sets of 3 pushes – 5 minutes at most!

Stephanie on

I think, like many, that c-sections are being done more often than they need to. I am a fairly small woman (just over 5 feet, and always a size 0) and just had a baby boy in February. He was large and looking back my doctor said he should have took that more into consideration. I had a natural birth and I had a 4th degree tear…it was rough. But, I will never schedule a c-section because of that. I am expecting my second child in February (two under the age of one!! eek!) and do not plan on having a c-section. However, a doctor should be trusted in matters such as these. If her doctor feels a c-section might be necessary it is for a good reason. In the end it really is about the health of mommy and baby.

Dee on

It must be incredibly surreal to have complete strangers commenting on your impending birth. I guess that is one of the prices of fame in this culture of celebrity obsession. And hey, Trista, if you are bothering to even read the rest of these comments… I wish you the best of luck in the birth of your baby. You sound incredibly educated about it all! And…trust your body.. it knows what to do. Here’s to a happy, healthy, safe labor for you and your little one.

tanya on

i think its a great thing for trisha and ryan to be having a baby.i am so happy they made it they are a buetiful couple and there going to have a buetiful baby trisha you made the right choice ryan is HOT

Deborah O'Neal on

c-sections are just fine to have, I had three of them and didn’t feel like I missed anything. I was awake for all three and enjoyed every minute of my childrens birth. I was out shopping within a week. Everyone is different, but there is nothing wrong with having a c-section.