Violet is 15 months old not 2 years old. She is fine wearing those shoes.

I remember when my children were small, I got this strong urge to buy all these stuff, toys and clothes, and I found out that I was only trying to rediscover and relive my own happy childhood. It was a totally selfish urge. The child doesn’t need all these things. The child would be better off with one teddy bear, one doll and just enough clothes to get by. You must grab your arm, and keep that credit card in your wallet, though the urge is so strong. And if the child’s room is starting to look like a toy store, a children clothing store or a Tivoli, you have already gone too far.

Not that you need advice – you are doing just great! If you keep on giving her the large amount of love and time and attention you are giving her now, you will not have any problems with her, at least not until she becomes a teenager (they are by nature always difficult, but as long as you don’t take it personally and show a lot of understanding and empathy, that will be painless as well). The largest fault parents should avoid is not having time for their kids, kids need time. You don’t have a 9-16 job, so you will not experience the stress in the morning or afternoon that I believe is a big danger, because when you are all stressed up you tend to yell – never, never yell, not even if you got afraid. Remember you are the leader in the parent-child relationship and the child should not be allowed to get doubts about that. You must talk about how you both will bring her up, so you do and say the same things to her. And keep on loving each other, and showing it. Be a good example. But I think you both just have a natural talent for parenthood, you have the right values in life, so you will succeed with out a doubt. Remember that she will also value love, affection, care, time, peace of mind and joy much more than the materialistic things in life.

Many pediatricians recommended that babies wear soft-soled shoes until they reach two years old, then switch to hard-soled toddler shoes.

More can be read here: http://www.pediped.com/Home/softsoles.aspx
http://www.cutebabyshoes.com/index.php?action=whysoft

Have her work along side you. Show her how to pick up her toys, put her diaper in the garbage, put her dirty clothes in the hamper, etc. Let her “help” do the dishes. This will give her a sense of self worth, and develop work ethic. she’ll never know she’s working – she’ll be spending time with mom!

Another tip is to use positive terms for “no”. For example…no running in the house– Lets use our walking feet inside. Jen seems like a really level headed woman so I think she will be just great.

I just made my husband watch an episode of Oprah from this past week on the subject of spoiling children. This generation is America’s most spoiled in history and it is ruining them…. work ethic and being thoughtful of others is completely going down the drain. It is a constant struggle in my family, my son’s grandmothers want to spoil him and yes so do I but in the end it will harm him. Spoiling teaches profound materialism which kills many morals and values that we’d all want our children to grow with. My son is now 3, he just got a wallet and he gets very small amounts of money for “chores”. When we go to the store, if he wants something, he can only have it (on a non-special occasion) if he has the money for it, or he can choose to save it for something better another day. It seems to be working well. I like nice things but I am not into keeping up with the Jones’, there is a line to draw.

I think that Jen is grounded enough to realise what to do and to realise when her daughter has enough. I work as a private English teacher for one of the worlds richest families and its something I struggle with everyday. I mean does a 5 year old need 10 pairs of $200 Armani Jeans? No of course not. Common sense goes a long way. Learning to say no also helps and not just for big things, ie no, its not ok to eat 5 cookies 10 minutes before dinner.
I could go on for hours on this topic!!

The best thing is moderation. Buy the kid treats and toys every once in a while, but not every time she asks. The most powerful weapon you can have is the simple word “No.” I also think it’s fine to make the kid earn rewards, like for good grades. It offers incentive to work hard, and doesn’t create a sense of entitlement.