More Affleck babies on the way – but not for awhile!

Jennifer Garner tells Marie Claire UK in it’s April issue that she and Ben Affleck are definitely having more kids – but not for a bit. Daughter Violet Anne is 15 months. She says,

I’m assuming we’ll have at least one more, but not for a while.

Jennifer also discusses the difficulties of raising a child in Hollywood when neither she nor her husband were – Jen is from West Virginia, and Ben was raised in Boston. They want to give her what the didn’t have, but walk a fine line to avoid spoiling her. Jen says,

It’s tough, I do love to buy little girls’ clothes. Ben would buy her anything. So we’regoing to have to pull back when she realizes what we’re doing. If anyone has any ideas, let me know!

Ben added that,

Jen has an incredible work ethic, not taking anything for granted. We want that so badly for [Violet].

Jen also discussed the emotional changes that come with motherhood, saying,

Since having my daughter. I feel both happiness and anxiety more deeply.

Source: People

So, since she asked, got any advice for Jen to avoid material spoiling?

Comments

The best thing is moderation. Buy the kid treats and toys every once in a while, but not every time she asks. The most powerful weapon you can have is the simple word “No.” I also think it’s fine to make the kid earn rewards, like for good grades. It offers incentive to work hard, and doesn’t create a sense of entitlement.

- Naughty Cal on March 9th, 2007

I think that Jen is grounded enough to realise what to do and to realise when her daughter has enough. I work as a private English teacher for one of the worlds richest families and its something I struggle with everyday. I mean does a 5 year old need 10 pairs of $200 Armani Jeans? No of course not. Common sense goes a long way. Learning to say no also helps and not just for big things, ie no, its not ok to eat 5 cookies 10 minutes before dinner.
I could go on for hours on this topic!!

- elisha Rose on March 9th, 2007

I just made my husband watch an episode of Oprah from this past week on the subject of spoiling children. This generation is America’s most spoiled in history and it is ruining them…. work ethic and being thoughtful of others is completely going down the drain. It is a constant struggle in my family, my son’s grandmothers want to spoil him and yes so do I but in the end it will harm him. Spoiling teaches profound materialism which kills many morals and values that we’d all want our children to grow with. My son is now 3, he just got a wallet and he gets very small amounts of money for “chores”. When we go to the store, if he wants something, he can only have it (on a non-special occasion) if he has the money for it, or he can choose to save it for something better another day. It seems to be working well. I like nice things but I am not into keeping up with the Jones’, there is a line to draw.

- Kori on March 9th, 2007

Another tip is to use positive terms for “no”. For example…no running in the house– Lets use our walking feet inside. Jen seems like a really level headed woman so I think she will be just great.

- Isabell on March 9th, 2007

Have her work along side you. Show her how to pick up her toys, put her diaper in the garbage, put her dirty clothes in the hamper, etc. Let her “help” do the dishes. This will give her a sense of self worth, and develop work ethic. she’ll never know she’s working – she’ll be spending time with mom!

- amy on March 9th, 2007

An advice for Jennifer: please Jen, buy to Violet shoes with soles. A baby of her age, cannot go with those shoes without soles. She needs boots that hold her ankles, so her feet won’t be deformed.
Violet already walks and this is very important for her feet.
Kisses!!

Many pediatricians recommended that babies wear soft-soled shoes until they reach two years old, then switch to hard-soled toddler shoes.

More can be read here: http://www.pediped.com/Home/softsoles.aspx
http://www.cutebabyshoes.com/index.php?action=whysoft

- Eve on March 9th, 2007

Not that you need advice – you are doing just great! If you keep on giving her the large amount of love and time and attention you are giving her now, you will not have any problems with her, at least not until she becomes a teenager (they are by nature always difficult, but as long as you don’t take it personally and show a lot of understanding and empathy, that will be painless as well). The largest fault parents should avoid is not having time for their kids, kids need time. You don’t have a 9-16 job, so you will not experience the stress in the morning or afternoon that I believe is a big danger, because when you are all stressed up you tend to yell – never, never yell, not even if you got afraid. Remember you are the leader in the parent-child relationship and the child should not be allowed to get doubts about that. You must talk about how you both will bring her up, so you do and say the same things to her. And keep on loving each other, and showing it. Be a good example. But I think you both just have a natural talent for parenthood, you have the right values in life, so you will succeed with out a doubt. Remember that she will also value love, affection, care, time, peace of mind and joy much more than the materialistic things in life.

- Mom of 2 on March 10th, 2007

I remember when my children were small, I got this strong urge to buy all these stuff, toys and clothes, and I found out that I was only trying to rediscover and relive my own happy childhood. It was a totally selfish urge. The child doesn’t need all these things. The child would be better off with one teddy bear, one doll and just enough clothes to get by. You must grab your arm, and keep that credit card in your wallet, though the urge is so strong. And if the child’s room is starting to look like a toy store, a children clothing store or a Tivoli, you have already gone too far.

- Mom of 2 on March 10th, 2007

Violet is 15 months old not 2 years old. She is fine wearing those shoes.

- Robyn on March 10th, 2007